


Fanning the Flames

by princess_smudge



Category: Sea Patrol (TV)
Genre: Everyone is there, F/M, Firefighters and Paramedics, Gen, No Navy AU, Past Rape/Non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2020-01-23 21:58:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 40
Words: 90,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18558697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princess_smudge/pseuds/princess_smudge
Summary: They say all great relationships start with a spark...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I have really tried to do my research for accuracy but it's kind of hard to find references that are Australian so anything that's wrong... totally my bad.

Kate always hated moving as a child. It was hard enough being  _that_ girl, the daughter of  _that_ woman in  _that_ house. She hated the fact that her whole life could be condensed into a few cardboard boxes, hated making a friend only to have to say goodbye. She hated having to introduce herself in front different classes, hated being told " _wow, you're so lucky to have seen so many amazing places!"_

The trouble was that all the places were all the same. There was nothing different or special about each little country town she and her mother found themselves in. There was always a pub, where her mother spent far too much time. The houses were always small, the lawns reduced to dirt. The swings at each playground were broken or tangled, the teachers reciting the same facts straight from textbooks. Each bedroom was the same, boxes piled in the corner because there was no point to unpacking.

Because worst of all, they always left town in the end.

And now here she was, just clinging to twenty-nine years old by her fingertips, and standing in front of another group of people she's expected to introduce herself to, feeling exactly like she had at nine years old. It's not hard to guess what they're thinking. She's small, and blonde, and young. Not to mention very obviously the only female. She doesn't belong here.

"I'm Kate McGregor." She begins, because there's no other way to start an introduction than a name, is there? She turns her gaze upon each person in turn, but none of the men cloistered around the table make any motion to move. She hesitates for a moment. Knowing that it gets easier isn't exactly encouraging when she feels like a sideshow at a circus. "I... uh... I'm your new transfer."

"Oh." One of the men say, and Kate blinks in his direction. He looks barely older than twenty, and Kate fights the urge to roll her eyes at the obvious  _male_ response. ' _Oh?'_ _Had he actually said that?_

"Well, I know I'm not exactly people's first pick for a firie." Kate tries to muster every ounce of confidence she has, peering at the man. "What with me being five-foot-six and blonde. But, hey, I've got the experience."

The 'oh'-er has the good grace to look embarrassed. She feels a small twinge of satisfaction, although she hates that this is even something she needs to justify. She knows that if a man had walked in, they'd have been welcomed with open arms. And, hell, she'd done her training.  _Always the boys club,_ she thinks ruefully. One of the more senior looking guys lean forwards slightly, propping their chin up with a hand. "You been in the service long?"

"Seven years this July." Kate answers promptly, because information is something she's good at. She's always had a great ability with facts, has been able to recall obscure dates and names at the drop of a hat. Of course, this is simply information about herself, but it gives her a purpose, and she jumps on it. "I've mostly been based rural for the last few years, so suburbia is kind of new to me. But I'm more than up to the challenge."

"Well..." He holds out a hand, and Kate takes it. She's not naive enough to believe she's been accepted. Not yet, anyway, as all eyes are still fixed on her. But she's determined to prove herself, so she doesn't let it worry her. Not yet. "You're just in time to help us do our checks." He rises to his feet, standing over a head taller than her. Kate forces herself not to step back. "I'm Buffer." He looks her up and down once more before turning back to his cards. "Morning briefing in ten minutes."

"Right." Kate nods, wondering if that is it. "Well, could I trouble someone to help me find somewhere to dump my stuff?" She tugs at the strap of her bag. Buffer doesn't even look up from his cards as he waves a hand lazily.

"Spider. Show her the lockers." He orders, before dropping a handful of poker chips to the table, and Kate understands herself to be dismissed.

"Uh, in here then, Ma'am." The kid that rises from the table looks barely eighteen. If he was a dog, Kate was sure his tail would be constantly wagging, as his face turns to hers, full of eagerness.

"Don't call me Ma'am." Kate shakes her head, following him.

"Right. Sorry." He nods nervously. "Ah, that's the comms. RO - ah, Robert usually looks after that. And we all take turns with the cooking. Kitchen's in there. Boss' office..." He gestures to each door as they pass. "And locker room is in here. So... ah, you can have this one." He points to an open locker, fingering the door nervously. "Ah, you need anything else?"

"Yeah." Kate nods. "Where's the briefing room?"

* * *

Kate has only heard about Station Commander Steve Marshall by reputation, but as she sits opposite him she realises that all of those stories had never quite done him justice.

"You may have noticed..." He begins, peering around at his station, "...that we have a new transfer with us." He has a knack of keeping each and every member of his team quiet and attentive. Even the 'oh'-er is straight backed and still. One of Marshall's hands gesture in Kate's direction, and she feels every eye turn on her. "I expect you all to make her feel welcome." His stare sweeps around at the crew assembled, his gaze adding a silent  _or else,_  before turning to a tall blonde man. "I'm assigning her to you, Dutchy."

The man nods but says nothing, and Kate feels her confidence fracture just a little, but she smiles at him nonetheless. A moment later a scraping of chairs announces the apparent end to the briefing as people begin moving in all directions. As Kate stands and tucks her own chair in, she sees the tall blonde man walking towards her. "I'm Dutchy. Dylan Mulholland. Ah... this way." He jabs his hand towards the door. "I'll show you around." But just at that moment, a loud, klaxon-like sound echoes through the room. "Or not." He adds, grinning apologetically and pointing towards the trucks. "Come on."

* * *

"So, you scared?" Kate turns to face the man who had broken the silence. It was the 'oh'-er, younger than her, with a wide boyish grin and blonde hair. Kate's gaze flicks towards his name tag - Kosov-Meyer - and she immediately recalls the nickname. 2Dads. "Plenty of people are. Not to many automobile accidents in the sticks." Kate shakes her head but doesn't elaborate. She knows how the game is played, knows that it's common practice to try and suss out the new recruits, to scare them. But she's far from a new recruit. "Yeah, we see some gruesome stuff, don't we?" He calls to the truck at large. "Why, Spide, why don't you tell McGregor about that croc attack we had last week?"

Spider is a nasty shade of green, and his nerves seem to calm Kate down. "Ease off, 2Dads!" Buffer orders, and the truck falls silent, or as silent as a vehicle with sirens and screeching tyres could be. She can tell that Buffer and Dutchy have seniority and bravado on their side, and that they're both quite similar, in terms of brawn at least.

Kate leans back against the seat of the firetruck, peering at 2Dads closely across Dutchy. Dutchy had basically dragged her to the truck the moment the call came through, shoving overalls and boots in her direction and then throwing her into the seat next to his. But she's far from surprised by this unfriendly welcoming, and smiles softly. "Actually, I was based in Warrimoo, on the edge of the Blue Mountains. And we backed onto the Great Western Highway, so... quite a few accidents."

2Dads blinks, having the good grace to look abashed. However, he rallies quickly, and Kate can tell he's going to be a pain in the arse - at least for the first few weeks. "Mountains, eh? So you're a cockroach? What brought you here?"

Kate knows that no story she could tell would ever satisfy him, so she adopts a dreamy gaze. "Oh, a psychic told me I'd find true love here." Kate tells him. Several eyes turn around to face her, and she waits a full ten seconds before rolling her eyes. "God, you guys are easy! You actually fell for that?"

"Ah, so it's gonna be like that, is it?!" 2Dads grins, a goofy smile on his face, and Kate just knows he's the practical joker of the station.

"Oh, 2Dads." Kate chuckles as they pull up to the scene. "You ain't seen nothing yet."

* * *

As Kate stares around, assessing the scene, she feels adrenaline flood her veins. Of course, she's no stranger to emergencies, but a desperation to prove herself has her peering around, making doubly sure she's not missing anything. 3 car accident. Car One - barely affected, driver out, no passengers. Car 2 - Driver pinned. No passengers. Being treated. Car 3 -  _shit._

"Get a winch. We need to secure it ASAP!" Buffer yells out, already commanding the situation and directing each member to different areas. "Charge, Spide, get extinguishers on Car Two. 2Dads, bring the jaws over. Dutchy, you've got McGregor with car three! ET, get it secure!"

"On it!" Dutchy shouts back, gesturing to Kate. The two of them jog to the spot where the third car is hanging upside-down, the ground beneath it crumbling as it slowly slides down towards the water below. The water isn't exactly deep, but it's still a drop of at least four metres that could do some serious damage to anyone inside. Right now, it seemed the only thing keeping the car from falling are the tangled wires of the broken guardrail. "So, protocol-"

"I know the protocol." Kate interrupts. "I've done this before." She knows she's being rude, but she also knows that disaster strikes in seconds, not minutes. "We secure the car first." She adds, more to satisfy his confidence than anything else. Kate hooks a cable around the tow-bar, checking it first, before handing the other end to ET. "Tow bar seems strong enough to hold it. You right to hook it up to the truck?" ET nods and dashes away, and Kate turns to Dutchy. "Send me down. I'm lighter. Less likely to disrupt the balance of the car."

"Okay." Dutchy hesitates for a fraction of a second before he throws a harness Kate's way. She steps into it quickly - years around the bush and rocky mountains have made her an expect at harnesses. "You ready?"

Kate nods, and starts to move downwards. The driver is hysterical, one arm flailing blindly behind her. She catches sight of Kate and starts to move even more, bloodied fingers fumbling with the seatbelt. "Oh God."

"Ma'am, it's okay." Kate calls out, raising her voice so that she can be heard from behind the thick windshield. "My name is Kate. I'm with the firies, and we're going to help you." Cut on her head. Blood. "What's your name?"

"J... Jasmine..." She whimpers. Her breath is coming fast, and Kate realises the woman is hyperventilating. "I... my-"

"Jasmine, are you hurt?" Kate tries to bring her back, knowing that simple questions are better at bringing someone back to reality.

"My... just my head." She raises a hand to her forehead, her fingers coming away bloody.

"Yeah, you've... you've got a bit of a cut. I'm sure we can get that fixed in no time. Okay, Jasmine. It's just very important that you don't move, okay? We're going to get you out of here, but I need you to remain calm."

"I... I can't-" Her eyes roll back into her head and she falls still.

"Shit." Kate curses. "Dutchy, she's unconscious and hyperventilating. I'm breaking a window." Digging through her pocket for her window breaker and smashes the window. The glass falls to the roof of the car, glinting like crystals. Kate reaches in and feels for a pulse. "Okay, she's alive but unconscious! Breathing is a bit shallow but-" But Kate stops as a new sound fills her ears. "Shit." Kate repeats, glancing into the back seat. "Guys, we've got a baby in here!"

* * *

She's standing in petrol, its pungent smell stinging her nostrils and raising bile in her throat. She's always hated the smell of fuel, even as a child, her head spinning every time she'd gone with her mother to fill up the car. There's no time to dwell on the scent though, as Kate finds herself peering in through a cracked window. The baby is wailing at the top of his lungs, and as much as it pulls on Kate's heartstrings to hear it, she's glad. If it's crying, it was breathing.

"Have you got eyes on the kid?" Dutchy calls through the radio.

It's there, strapped into its carseat and thrashing wildly. "Infant, approximately three months old. No injuries that I can see." A new smell is filling her lungs. "Dutchy, I smell smoke, and I'm standing in fuel! Where are the paramedics?!"

"Still two minutes. Spider, I need extinguishers. Quick! McGregor, can you get to the kid?"

Kate examines the scene for a moment, then keys her radio. "I think I'd have to go through the rear windscreen."

"Can you handle it?" If it had been her old team, Kate might have been offended, but she knows he has to ask. After all, he has no idea what she's capable of, what she can handle.

"Yes." And with that, she moves to the rear windshield. "I can handle it."

It's not the first time she's had to crawl through a windshield at work, but it's the first with a baby screaming, and Kate feels every cry tear at her heart. It's harder still, because there's no way to get to the baby through the front windows, and the rear window expands upwards towards the roof. But it's already smashed, and Kate manages to slip in, perching precariously on what had previously been the roof of the car. "Hey." She coos. "Hey, sweetie." His little face is red with a combination of screams and blood rushing to his head, and Kate longs to just cuddle him and tell him everything is going to be okay. "You're going to be okay." She whispers, as she quickly checks over him. There's a minor glass-cut on his cheek, but aside from that he looks fine, and Kate's fingers move to the buckle of the carseat that had saved his life.

"Just use the seatbelt cutter!" Dutchy calls, and Kate's ears are keen enough to hear the note of urgency in his voice that tells her time is limited. "Get the kid out. I'm sending Spide down to help."

"Okay." Kate calls back, making short work of the carseat. A moment later, the squalling infant is in her arms, and Kate feels relief flood her. "Here." Spider calls, his arms moving through the broken window towards Kate. "Give him here."

"Support his head, yeah?" Kate reminds him, and Spider nods. Loathe though she is to let him leave her grasp, she passes the baby over, watching anxiously as Spider carries him up towards the waiting paramedics.

"2Dads is going to come down with a spinal board for the driver." Dutchy calls through the radio, and Kate forces herself to get her head in the game. "Let's get this done."

* * *

"So, first emergency?" Buffer murmurs, approaching Kate as she stands in front of her locker, hair-brush in hand. She jumps at the sudden entrance, her thoughts still back on the baby. "How do you feel?"

Kate glances up and sees that Buffer isn't the only one looking at her. Spider, Dutchy, Charge and 2Dads are all standing there too, peering intently at Kate. "Any news about the mother and bub we pulled from the car?" Kate enquires, ignoring his questions about her well-being for the moment.

"Yeah, Chris, one of the paramedics, said they were doing well when they got them to the hospital." Dutchy informs her, and Kate nods, feeling a weight lift from her shoulder.

"So you know the paramedics well?"

"Eh, well enough." Dutchy shrugs. "ET's dating one of them, so we see them a fair bit. And they're based not far from us. Same district and all."

Kate glances around and realises that ET isn't with them. "Why do you call him ET?" Kate frowns, a small smile across her face. She doesn't want to think about the other stuff, about how she'd been so scared she'd wanted to cry, or how glad she was when she held that baby in her arms and he was fine.

Spider chuckles. "The amount of girls he was getting a week? That was an other-worldly power. Least until he met Nikki. But the nickname stuck, even if the lifestyle didn't." The guys chuckle, and even Kate grins at the joke.

"Pretty intense first shift with us." Buffer agrees, nodding. "But you handled yourself well. Dutchy gave you a glowing review, and between you and me, he's not impressed easily." Kate gives a small smile at his compliment, even if Dutchy averts his gaze and busies himself with his own locker.

"Well, thanks." Kate nods. "To... to all of you."

Charge grins and claps a hand on Kate's shoulder. "Well, we were all just headed out to the pub. End of shift, you know? Feel like joining us? We'll give you a proper welcome to Cairns?"

Kate closes her locker and turns to the group at large. "Thanks for the offer, but, uh... I got someone waiting at home. So another time?"

"Sure." Buffer agrees. "Another time. And Kate..." She turns back to face him. "Welcome to the team."


	2. Chapter 2

"I am late. I am  _so_ late!" Kate's voice is almost a song as she dashes through the apartment in search of her bag. "Bee, where's my bag?!" She turns and very nearly trips over a cardboard box. Not even bothering to see whether it's in the right room or not, Kate nudges it none-too-gently with her foot, sending it skidding into the opposite wall, and spies her bag on top of a blanket box. She transfers a piece of toast between her teeth and rummaging around for a moment, searching for her keys, all the while chanting  _late late late_ over and over in her head.

Tugging the toast from her mouth once more, Kate raises her voice once more. "Bridie! Come on! We've got to go!" She hates yelling, hates feeling like she's the bad guy, but this is the fourth time she's announced that they need to leave, and her patience is running thin. "Bridie Mae! We need to  _go_!"

The ten-going-on-fifteen-year-old dashes down the hall, her wild blonde curls flying all over her face as she shoulders her schoolbag. "I still need you to make me lunch, Mum!" Bridie grumbles, definitely not a morning person. At least she's dressed now though, although Kate notes that one sock is taller than the other and her hair is a tangled mess. "And I can't get my hair to unknot."

"Urgh. Head down." Kate grips the toast between her teeth once more as she scoops Bridie's long blonde hair into a messy bun atop the young girl's head. "We'll tackle the knots later. That's tonight's job. And..." Kate rummages in her bag once more, extracting her wallet. "Canteen?"

"It's not open Tuesdays and Thursdays." Bridie points out, hands on her hips and looking every bit as stubborn as ever.

"Of course it isn't." Kate rakes a hand through her own hair, ushering Bridie out the door. "Let's just get going, and we'll grab food from the servo on the way. But we need to go! Car!"

"I'm running low on socks too." Bridie calls out as she slides into the back seat. "And I need you to iron a school dress for me for tomorrow. And can you find some of my pyjamas so I don't have to sleep in your clothes?"

Kate nods distractedly, running a hand through her hair once more. "Yeah, I know, Baby. Sorry. I need to unpack the rest of our clothes and... and hopefully I can get a load of washing on when I get back tonight."

"You said that yesterday." Bridie mutters as Kate starts to drive.

"Well, I was expecting Cal home." Kate grumbles. "But once again..." She trails off. "Look, let's just get to where we need to go on time. And we'll sort out the rest later."

* * *

Kate's car skids into the carpark twenty minutes later, inwardly cursing. Of course, she was usually so punctual, but today it seemed her good luck had run out as she found herself faced with a broken alarm clock, a grumpy daughter and an uncooperative hot water system. She scoops her bag up, glancing at her watch, and breaks into a run as she skids into the building. If she just managed to get her bag down in time-

"Sir!" Kate exclaims, just managing to avoid crashing into the imposing figure of Steve Marshall, their unit captain. She has to throw a hand out to the wall to steady herself, just managing to keep her feet before she pulls herself into a somewhat dignified standing position. "Uh... sorry. I was..."

"Five minutes late for your shift?" He finishes, glancing pointedly at his watch.

"I'm sorry." Kate winces. "It won't happen again, Sir."

He shakes his head. "See that it doesn't. In the meantime..." He jabs a hand towards the garage. "You can clean the gear."

* * *

"Late on your third shift. Not a good start, McGregor." 2Dads clucks in mock admonition, crunching an apple between his teeth. "And nearly crashing into Marshall along the way..."

"Piss off, 2Dads." Kate groans, scrubbing at a stubborn piece of dirt on the side of one of the helmets. In terms of punishments, it's far less than what she had been expecting, but her ears still burn at the inescapable feeling of failure, and 2Dads' shit-eating grin is almost too much to take.

"So what had you running late anyway?" He presses, taking a seat opposite her and grinning. Kate squeezes the sponge and resists the urge to toss it at his head.

"Urgent appointment with my nail technician." Kate grumbles, though the corners of her mouth twitch as she sees 2Dads' eyes widen, just a little. A moment later, he seems to pick up on the fact that she's teasing him, and rolls his eyes. Kate clears her throat and grins. "What'd I miss at the pub?"

"Uh, Dutchy met a girl. Robert was insufferably boring as ever. And the boss was in a foul mood." He grins. "As evidenced by... this. At least he didn't make you scrub out the toilets.  _That's_ a favourite punishment of his."

"That's a Navy punishment." Kate corrects.

2Dads' brow furrows. "And how would you know that?" He presses.

"I was in the academy. Dropped out though."

"What?!" 2Dads looks as though Christmas has come early. "Why?"

"I flipped a coin. Stay or leave."

"You're kidding." 2Dads narrows his eyes. "That's a joke, right?"

"Of course. But, hey, it led me here. Just working with fire instead of water."

"That's..." He frowns. "I can't picture you in the Navy."

Kate smirks. "Well, I-" But Kate is interrupted as a siren rings out. "Duty calls." She mutters.

* * *

"You guys actually get called out to tend to stuff like this?" Kate frowns as she peers at the cat stuck in the tree.

"Well, I'd say we're here more for the guy who is dangling by his belt buckle trying to rescue the cat, but yeah." Dutchy grins, as he watches Charge position the ladder, Spider readying himself to climb. The kid looks terrified, and Kate wonders if he's one of those new recruits who didn't quite think through how a fear of heights could affect his new career choice. Of course, he's nowhere near as terrified as the man hanging face-down from the tree-branch.

"Can one of you please help me?!" He shouts down at Kate and Dutchy.

"Help's on the way." Dutchy calls back, before turning to Kate. "So, are you ever going to join us for a night out? It's not all drinking until we pass out." He peers towards the spot where the two team medics, Nikki and Chris, are waiting. "Might give you the chance to get to know more of the team."

"Look," Kate exhales heavily. "Things are..." But she's cut off as her mobile rings. Glancing at the caller ID, she sees the name  _Cal_ across it once more. "Finally! Sorry, I've got to take this. You right for a second?"

"Sure." Dutchy nods. "But you should get one night off every once in a while, shouldn't you?"

* * *

Kate is beyond frustrated, pacing in tight lines against the fire truck. "Cal, you have to expect I'm going to get worried when you don't come home! Can you just-" Kate cuts herself off as she spots Dutchy walking down the hall. "Look, I'll call you back. I need to get back to work." She hangs up the phone and turns to face Dutchy, plastering a smile across her face. "Hey."

Dutchy grins, bumping Kate's shoulder lightly. "You all good?"

"Yeah." Kate nods, shoving her phone into her pocket.

"Boyfriend trouble?" He presses.

"What?" Kate mutters distractedly. "No."

"Oh. Sorry. It just sounded like-" He trails off. "Don't worry. So... uh... tonight?"

"I can't make it. Sorry." Kate gives a regretful smile. Dutchy's brow furrows as they watch Spider successfully freeing the man from the tree and help him onto the ladder, but he says nothing more about her going out with them for the rest of the call.


	3. Chapter 3

"You want to put the siren on?" The young boy sitting next to her grins eagerly and nods, sitting up a little straighter. His plastic fireman's cap slides down so that it's a little lopsided, but this only makes him look even more adorable.

"Yeah!" He nods eagerly, so that his hat slides even further over his eyes. Kate laughs and fixes it for him, lifting it back up, before moving her hand to hover over a switch.

"Alright. Flick this switch and-" The siren blares. Kate lets it ring for several seconds before switching it off again, leaving a deafening silence in its wake. The boy's smile widens. "Cool, right?"

"This is the best day ever!" He agrees, his grin wider still.

"So, you guys do this often?" Kate enquires as she escapes the crowds of young families to take a swig from her water bottle. "The open days?"

"Eh, every six months or so." Dutchy shrugs, smiling as they watch several children skipping around an unimpressed-looking Robert. "Good for public relations. Community spirit and all that." He lowers his voice conspiratorially and adds, "Plus, if we're good, the boss lets us on the jumping castle at the end of shift."

Kate very nearly chokes on her water as she imagines the team bouncing on a Frozen jumping castle. In particular, the image of Charge and Robert causes particular amusement, and Dutchy has to give her three hard blows to the back. When she's recovered, spluttering slightly, Dutchy presses his favourite question upon her.

"So, pub tonight?" He adopts a puppy dog expression as Kate remains stony-faced. "Come on! You've gotta come out with us once! Spend some quality time with your favourite firies!"

"And I will. One day. But I have plans tonight." Kate flashes an apologetic smile. "Hey, I'm living out of cardboard boxes at the moment. I need to get my place in order." She glances around, checking for eavesdroppers and spies, before she lifts up the hem of her pants to reveal odd socks, one rainbow and stripey, the other purple and fluffy. "I'm down to bed socks. Odd bed socks at that."

Dutchy snorts in amusement, although hurriedly stifles his laugh as he catches Marshall's unimpressed gaze. "Oops. Better get back to greeting the community." He leans closer to Kate. "Did you know there's a little boy who wants to be a firefighter when he grows up?"

"Who'd have thought it, hey?" Kate winks back, twisting around to the crowd once more. "See you on the other side?"

He gives her a mock salute and disappears.

Somehow finding herself roped into the facepainting table while 2Dads takes, in his words, a well-earned trip to Point Percy, Kate finishes yet another child's painting and waves goodbye. Spider approaches, eyes darting around nervously, perhaps on the lookout for the group of twelve-year-old boys who had decided to make it their days' mission to chase him around. "I am exhausted." He mutters. "Can I hide here for a bit?"

"Look busy." Kate mutters, not looking up from her paints. "Boss is watching."

"Dammit." He mutters. "You need a hand here? Uh... I can paint spiders?" For something to do, he shuffles the paints around aimlessly.

The next kid in the queue, a young girl decked out vibrantly in brightest pink, crinkles her nose. "No!" She shakes her head, pointing to Kate. "I want the girl to paint me. I don't like Spiders."

Kate grins. "Sorry, Spi. Fresh outta luck." Kate turns to the girl. "And what would you like?"

"Whoa." 2Dads grins, returning to the table with an impressed look on his face. "Did you paint the dragons? They're wicked!" He takes a seat next to Kate, fanning himself with a pamphlet on smoke alarms. "It's hot in here, hey!"

"Only cause you've been hiding out in the aircon for fifteen minutes." Kate frowns, holding out the paintbrush. "You gonna take over again?"

"No way, Mozart. You look like you're doing smashingly."

Kate rolls her eyes as she begins on the butterfly design the girl had requested. "Mozart is music, not painting." She points out, but 2Dads merely shrugs, taking a gulp of a Coca Cola can.

"Eh. Whatever it is, you've got the knack for it. I'm gonna..." He trails off before he's even bothered to give an excuse, melting back into the crowd, and Kate rolls her eyes once more, working dutifully on the different designs until Dutchy approaches.

"I'm hiding." He reports. "But I tell you, there's some desperate housewives out there."

Kate snorts, looking up in time to see several women eyeing Dutchy with interest. "You love it. Bet you applied for the calendars and all."

"So what if I did?" He defends, waving a hand over his body. "Some people deserve to see perfection."

"Hmm... Mister October." Kate grins, just as the next child steps up to the face paints.

"Mum!" Kate's head snaps up and she finds herself face to face with Bridie, her blonde curls a lot neater than they had been the other day, secured in two pigtails.

"Bridie!" Kate sits up and wraps her daughter in a hug. "I didn't think Cal could bring you?"

"Surprise!" Bridie grins. "Can I get face paint? Batman?"

"Sure. Only because you've queued up. And this means we've gotta wash your hair tonight." Kate pats the seat, before catching sight of Dutchy. "Oh, Bee, this is Dutchy. I work with him. Dutchy, this is my daughter Bridie." A woman with shoulder-length indigo hair comes to stand behind Bridie, and Kate's eyes narrow. "And this is my sister Cal, who I am absolutely going to strangle-"

"Hey, it wasn't my fault." Cal fires up at once, holding her hands out in mock surrender. "We were peaceful!"

"And yet you still got arrested." Kate finishes, beginning the Batman mask around her daughter's eyes. "Can you please try not to get arrested when I need you to take Bee to school?"

"Certainly wasn't my intention." Cal winces, readjusting her nose ring.

"You don't think it's your face full of piercings and bright hair that makes you look more threatening?" Kate presses.

"Always at me about the piercings. Geez, Kate! And I've seen photos of the stuff you used to wear when you were bartending! Don't lecture me!"

"Wait?" 2Dads frowns, popping up out of seemingly nowhere and gesticulating wildly to Kate. "I mean, we'll come back to those photos later, but... Cal's not your husband?"

"No." Cal spits, raking a hand through her hair. "What gave you that idea?"

"Uh, her getting angry on the phone?" Dutchy suggests.

"And the name." 2Dads adds, tipping his head. "Typically, Cal is a male name."

"Oh, that." Cal grins, and they catch a flash of a silver tongue piercing. "Well, it's actually short for Callista, but no one calls me that."

"But... you're young." 2Dads turns to Kate, who is still dutifully finishing the face painting. "You're too young to have a kid! I mean..." He flushes, apparently realising how rude that sounds.

"I was nineteen when she was born, if that's what you're trying to calculate." Kate raises an eyebrow in his direction. His face goes, if possible, even redder. Bridie grins.

"She likes to keep me a secret." She giggles. "So..." She admires her face paint in the mirror. "You gonna show me around?"

"It's bigger than the last station." Bridie muses, peering around curiously and taking in the different equipment and vehicles around. "More people, I guess?" Kate nods in agreement, and Bridie smiles softly. "You like it better?"

"It's... different." Kate settles on eventually, which is the truth. She still misses the closeness of her old team, but she can't deny the excitement of the different calls are thrilling here, not to mention that she doesn't have to worry about her car engine freezing over in the tropics. "But... it's good."

"Dutchy's cute." Bridie adds, peering at Kate closely as if trying to gauge her reaction.

Kate rolls her eyes and turns to her daughter. "He's so not my type. And I don't date firies."

"You dated Lachlan." Bridie points out, raising an eyebrow in Kate's direction.

"Yeah, and look how that turned out." Kate waves a hand, before her eyes narrow. "And you weren't supposed to know about that!"

"Mum, I'm almost eleven. The time you could tell me you were going out for work drinks with a special friend have long since passed." She slows down and catches her mother's eye. "It would be nice to actually meet one of these guys."

"Well, I... I'm not introducing anyone to you unless I'm... sure." Kate bumps lightly into Bridie's side, and the young girl clicks her tongue.

"Sure?"

"Look," Kate rolls her eyes. "Can I just show you around the firehouse without you trying to set me up? Where's your aunt anyway?"

"She was flirting with someone." Bridie shrugs her shoulders. "Same old."

"So, you have a kid." Dutchy muses, moving to stand beside her. The crowds are thinning out now, with most families heading home. Most of the remaining families are cloistered around the jumping castle, trying unsuccessfully to coax unwilling kids off, or else chatting to other parents.

"Why is that such a big shock to everyone?" Kate laughs, holding her arms up. "I mean, do I look sterile or something? Or do I have the gaze of some eternal virgin?"

Buffer overtakes them. "It's just usually something you tell people when you meet them, is all." Dutchy says nothing, but points goodnaturedly, as though in agreement with Buffer's words.

"Well..." Kate hesitates, then rolls her eyes. "Guys, I'm the only woman joining a firehouse where no one knows me. Being a short-arse is one thing, but a single mother is another. I... I didn't want to give you guys any more reason to think I was weak."

Buffer says nothing, but keeps walking. Dutchy, however, gives a sad sort of smile. "So you are a single mother, then?"

Kate lets out a dry laugh. "I thought you'd gathered that by my sad living conditions with my baby sister?"

"Eh." Dutchy grins. "Not sad. Not by a long shot."

She opens her mouth to argue as they make their way into the garage, but a shout distracts her. "Help! Help, please!" Kate and Dutchy exchange a glance before they both start running, already halfway to the man before anyone else has moved. His eyes are wide and terrified as he clutches his daughter in his arms, and Kate does a quick mental assessment. Girl, maybe 11 or 12. Blue lips. Limp. "Please, someone help! My daughter's not breathing!"

"Okay, put her down." Kate commands, and the man lays the girl down onto the concrete. Kate leans down, listening for breath sounds while she feels for a pulse. A second later 2Dads skids to a halt beside them. "What's her name?"

"R- Rose. Rosie. We... we were just standing outside and... she just started having trouble breathing and I didn't know what to do." He's panicked, but Kate doesn't have the time to calm him down right now. She knows he'll be okay, as long as his daughter is. So she works on the girl.

"Dutchy, do a nose-to-toes." Kate turns her gaze to the man. "Sir, did she take anything? Eat anything unusual?"

"No." The man seems genuinely bewildered, eyes wide as his gaze is fixed on his daughter. "We were just standing... Rosie!"

"Got a sting here." Dutchy murmurs, indicating a red mark on her upper arm. "Bee sting?" He turns to the man. "Is she allergic?"

"I... I don't know. She's never been stung."

"I think she's going into anaphylactic shock. 2Dads, grab-"

"On it." 2Dads finishes the thought for her, dashing off and returning a moment later with an epipen. Kate takes it from him and uncaps it.

"One, two-" She stabs the epipen into the girl's thigh, holding it there. "Come on." Kate mutters. "Come on."

A gasp of breath, and Rose's eyes fly open. "Rose, can you hear me?" Kate asks. "Squeeze my hand if you can hear me." A tiny increase of pressure. "Good girl. An ambulance is on its way, okay? You're going to be fine."

She turns her gaze towards the man, who's still standing there, and she touches a hand to his shoulder. "She's going to be fine."


	4. Chapter 4

"You lot are back early." Marshall observes by way of greeting, arms folded, as they clamber one by one out of the truck. He cuts an imposing figure, hovering in the doorway, and even though she knows she's done nothing wrong, Kate finds herself hesitating, running over all the things she should have done in her head to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything. Judging by the looks on everyone else's face, they're having the same reaction as she is; Spider looks on the verge of strapping himself back into the truck.

"Ah, it turned out to only be a small stove fire, Boss." Buffer informs him, breaking the tense silence of the crews. "Got it sorted out pretty quickly."

"Well, good." Marshall nods curtly, his gaze raking over them all. "In that case, drills in five minutes."

* * *

"I hate ladders." Spider mutters from his spot several rungs above Kate.

"Don't you dare fall on me." She growls back, already feeling tense enough due to Spider's ever-shaking legs. She's been on tenterhooks the entire climb, expecting Spider to fall at any moment.

"Well, obviously it's not my plan for the day." He spits back, his leg wobbling as he climbs another rung.

"Come on, guys! McGregor! Webb! Enough chatting! This is a drill! Seconds make all the difference!" Marshall calls from below, and Kate sighs. Spider picks up the pace, and Kate feels her unease increase, but mercifully they both reach the top of the roof unscathed. Spider looks about ready to simply lie on the ground and whimper, so Kate takes the lead, moving towards the ropes and harnesses.

"Why did you become a firefighter if you're scared of heights?" Kate presses, as she winds the harness around her and begins tightening the straps to fit her.

"I'm not afraid!" Spider spits, as though she's suggested he still sleeps with a nightlight or something. "I just have a... healthy respect... for them."

"Right." Kate rolls her eyes, checking her line is secure. "Sure."

* * *

By the end of the day, Kate is sore, itchy and filthy. Between rescuing their drill dummy - affectionately dubbed Nelson - from a variety of different situations, she longs for nothing more than a bath and a bottle of wine. Her hair is matted to the back of her neck with sweat, and she sinks into the hot water of the shower to freshen up. She's glad at least that she can go home and relax, but as she remembers that Cal had promised to take Bridie to the movies, she reflects she'll probably end up restless and find herself cleaning or unpacking.

It's as she's walking out of the building that she spots the man, walking towards them all, and it takes a moment or to to recognise him as Rose's father. He looks nervous as he approaches, but as he catches Kate's gaze, he seems to gain more confidence, and directs himself towards her. He stops just in front of her, and gives an awkward wave. "Hi, I... uh don't know if you remember me, but I'm-"

"Rose's Dad." Kate finishes for him, and he seems to relax just a little. "Yes, we remember. How's she going?"

"Good." His face lights up. "Great, even. Ah, we've been taught the ways of the Epipen and we're doing well. I just wanted to come down and say thank you in person. She'd have come herself but she's at her grandparents this weekend and... well, I couldn't wait. I just had to come and say thank you." He holds out his hand to each of them in turn, and they all shake.

"There's no need to thank us." Dutchy assures him. "We're just glad we could help, Mate."

He nods in gratitude and runs a hand through his hair. "Well, I was actually wondering if I could shout you all a round at the pub to say thanks? I would have brought chocolate or something but... well, I know after a long day a beer is often preferable."

"We can't let you shout us, but you can certainly join us if you want." Dutchy interjects, smiling warmly at the guy. "We're just headed to the local for a few. Kate, you going to come?" He peers questioningly at her, and after a moment, Kate nods.

"Sure." She agrees, because it at least beats sitting at home by herself.  _Nothing to do with how blue his eyes are._ As they turn and start to walk down the street, she turns to the man. "Sorry, I didn't catch your name?"

"Oh, it's Mike." He tells her, as they fall into step. "Mike Flynn."


	5. Chapter 5

She was supposed to have stopped making reckless decisions. She was supposed to have stopped making  _stupid_ decisions. And yet, here she is, fishing her bra out from underneath a stranger's bed and praying Mike Flynn doesn't wake up. And what does it matter that his house is clean and neat? That's not the mark of a good man. In fact, it could be the mark of a  _married_ man.

 _Didn't think that one through, did you Kate?_ She shudders, and scoops up her jeans, trying to turn them back in the right way as silently as she can. He definitely didn't have a ring; she would have noticed that. But not all men wore rings now anyway.  _And he has a daughter,_ she thinks.  _That means there was a woman, at least somewhere along the line._

She's half-way through pulling her jeans back on when Mike opens his eyes, and she freezes, torn between guilt that he's caught her trying to sneak out, and a defiant internal justification that she doesn't owe him anything. In truth, part of her is already furious at him, as if it had already been confirmed that he was all of those  _worst nightmare_ things - a married sociopathic kleptomaniac with a foot fetish. For his part, he doesn't look hurt, or upset that he's just busted her in the act of her escape. If anything, he looks annoyingly amused at her apparent unease, rolling over and smiling lazily. "Sneaking out?" He accuses, a smile twisting his lips.

Mike's amusement puts her at ease though, and she rolls her eyes, part of her pleased to find that at least he was a bit of a jerk. The knowledge stems her guilt, but she says nothing, simply turning away from him and pulling on her shirt. It's only when she's dressed that she faces him once more, and suddenly finds herself saying, "I... I don't normally do this."

Immediately, she regrets it. She hates sounding weak. "Do  _what_?" Mike presses. He stretches lightly. Kate forces herself to keep her gaze off his chest. "Have sex? Run out before they wake? Get dressed at five in the morning?"

"You're not going to make this easy for me, are you?" She deadpans. It's not that she  _wants_ to be rude. But the unapologetic humour in him is rubbing her the wrong way. "Glad to see you're enjoying this."

"Hey, you seemed to be enjoying yourself last night." He muses, ducking as she lobs a balled-up pair of boxers at his head.

"Just... can you get dressed or something?" She's finding his chest distracting, not to mention the first hand knowledge that he is naked under the sheet that just seems to be hanging in there...

"You know this is  _my house,_ right?" He presses. She only raises an eyebrow in response, and he sighs in a long-suffering sort of way, but thankfully begins to dress.

She waits until he's at least somewhat decent before clearing her throat and blurting out the question that's been pressing in on her since she realised what she'd done. "Are you married?"

"What?" It's obviously not the question he's expecting. It seems to stem the stubborn smirk in any case.

"Well, you've got a kid. It's not  _that_ big of a stretch. And this place..." She waves a hand around, indicating the quilt that matches just a  _little_ too well with the rest of the furniture. It's not just that, or the cleanliness of the environment, but the simple evidence of history. She's always had terrible taste in guys.

"I'm a widower." He says simply, and Kate finds herself mixed with a cocktail of guilt and relief. She wonders how many times he's said it before, whether he has in fact  _ever_ said it, because the words sound foreign in his voice.

"Sorry." She realises just how hollow the condolence sounds, but she can't  _not_ say anything. "Oh, God." She rakes a hand through her hair, muttering to herself. "This is  _beyond_ unprofessional and kind of frowned upon-"

"I want it known I did  _just_ want to buy you all a drink, you know." Mike supplies, holding his hands up in apparent surrender. "To say thanks. I didn't mean for... this... to happen." He gestures towards his bed, the bedclothes scattered across the room, in clear indication of what  _this_ entails. His movement sends two empty foil packets fluttering to the ground. For a moment they both stare at them, before Kate turns away.

It's all too much. She feels distinctly claustrophobic, trapped in a closed room with a man she barely knows.  _And knows too well,_ she adds silently. "I... look, can we talk later? I need to get to work." It's a lie; she's not rostered on for another 36 hours, but she needs to get out of there.

"Yep. Traffic could be bad." Mike muses drily, peering pointedly through the blinds at the spot where the firehouse is visible. He cups his hands around his eyes like binoculars, before giving a low whistle. "Looks like it'll take you a good thirty seconds, at least. You'd better head out now before the conditions get worse."

"Are you always this much of a smartarse?" Kate snaps, scooping up her bag.

"Are you always this snappy?" He counters. "Because you haven't exactly been a ray of sunshine this morning."

"I... I was going to leave my number." She mutters.

Mike glances around at the surfaces in the room. "Well, I don't see it."

She hesitates for a moment longer, before slipping her hand into her pocket and pulling out the piece of paper. "I'm not looking for a relationship." She adds, almost as a warning.

"Neither am I." Mike counters. For a moment they stare at each other. Then Kate shoulders her bag.

"See you around." She mutters, before darting out into the morning sun.

* * *

"Ooh, and here we have our lovely Katie McGregor sporting yesterday's clothes for the Walk of Shame!" Cal grins, accompanying Kate's entrance with jazz hands and a wide smirk.

Kate groans. She'd been hoping that Cal would be asleep, as she usually is at five-thirty am on a Sunday morning, but as she catches the grin on Cal's face, she knows that her sister had been waiting for this, for the game of twenty questions that was sure to come. "Can you... shhh! I don't want Bridie to hear!" Kate pushes her bag against the wall and moves into the kitchen, setting about making herself a coffee.

Of course, she's not naive enough to believe that this simple movement will be enough to rid herself of her younger sister, but the sight of Cal sitting herself on the kitchen bench and smiling a grin worthy of the Cheshire Cat, Kate groans. "So... who's the guy?" Cal draws out her words, so that she sounds like a toddler on a playground. "Do I know him?"

"No!" Kate shakes her head. "It was... no one."

Cal rolls her eyes, leaning forwards. "Oh, come on, Katie, come on! My love life is pathetic. Can I at least live through you?"

"Oh yeah, because my love life is fantastic." Kate mutters sarcastically, peering critically at Cal's face. "Did you get another piercing?" In response, Callista simply waggles a pierced eyebrow and grins. Kate rolls her eyes, turning back to her coffee. "So how are your assessments going?"

"No,  _Kate_!" Cal drags a hand over her ears. "I have three more days of uni break! Let me procrastinate in peace! And stop changing the subject!"

"Okay! But you need to-"

"Focus on my studies." Cal finishes. "Yeah, I know." She slides across a piece of toast. "And before you ask,  _no,_ Bridie did  _not_ notice you weren't in bed when we got home."

"Cheers." Kate takes a gulp of the coffee, sighing as the liquid warms her throat.

"So, are you going to see him again?" Kate doesn't answer immediately, finding herself thinking about the days of yesteryear. Cal leans forward and, as though she knows exactly what Kate is worrying about, claps a hand to her shoulder. "Katie, one of these days you're going to find a man who's worth meeting your daughter."

"But I haven't yet." Kate finishes. "And  _he_  is not it. Bet you ten bucks he doesn't even call."

* * *

But of course he does call, and it's so bloody infuriating hearing his voice, even if it  _is_ just a voicemail. He sounds every bit as cocky and teasing as he had that morning. She doesn't finish the messages, finds herself stabbing the delete button out of pure irritation, unable to believe that she could have been so stupid.

"Sister trouble again?" Dutchy enquires goodnaturedly, as he catches her dropping her phone into her bag once more.

Kate hums in a noncommittal fashion and locks away her bag. "Better get to it. The boss'll kill me if I'm late again."

* * *

She bypasses irritation and heads straight to fury as she turns around, waiting for the school bell to ring, and spies Mike standing ten metres away from her, leaning against a tree. So she knew she  _probably_ should have called him back, strictly speaking. But he was just so smug and persistent and maddening that, seeing him now, she knows it was the right call. If he'd follow her here after  _one night,_ what wouldn't he do for more?

She storms up to him, angrily kicking a small rock, and jabs him in the chest. "So you're following me now? Is that it?" She demands, scanning his face for any sort of reaction.

He raises an eyebrow coolly, smiling softly. "Hey, I'm just going about my business here. No stalking intended. But if you ask me, it seems  _you're_ the one that's following me. I mean, I  _was_ here first." He shrugs lightly.

Kate scoffs and rolls her eyes, not believing a word. "Oh, come on! You expect me to believe you  _just_ ended up here on some leisurely stroll?"

"Well, no." He gestures towards the school, where the bell is now ringing. "I'm actually here to pick up Rose. You know? My daughter? See... this is her school." He leans closer, pointing up the hill, and adopts a look of enthusiasm worthy of a children's television presenter. "And if you squint  _just a little,_ that is her classroom."

Oh.

Rose.

Of course.

"The real question is, why are  _you_ here?" He presses, folding his arms. "Unless of course, it's you that's stalking me?" He tips her an enormous wink. Maybe he  _does_ think she's followed him.

"I..." To tell him about Bridie is too much information. But he's standing here, and what other possible reason can she have for standing outside a school? Before she's made the decision either way, however, she spots Bridie dashing down the hill towards her.

"Mum!" Bridie calls out, giving her a quick hug, just as Rose crashes into Mike. She doesn't look at him. She doesn't want to see the look on his face, whatever it might be. Because there's no  _good_ emotion. Either fear, or shock, or interest, or amusement. And none of those are what she wants. But Bridie is pulling away, moving towards Mike and Rose, and Kate has to fight the urge to pull her back, as though Mike is a crocodile about to snap. "Mum, this is my friend Rosie!" Bridie grins. "Can she come over one afternoon? I mean, if it's okay with her Dad?"

She delays for five long seconds, before she realises that she has no choice but to look at him and take in his amused smile. "So..." He gives another low whistle. "Your daughter is the famous Bridie McGregor."


	6. Chapter 6

Kate folds her arms as she leans against the firetruck, watching the sea of thousands of people all clad with signs and banners chanting. "They're determined, I'll give them that." Buffer mutters as they watch a group of women who seem to be chivying up the group, one clutching a megaphone. Between the frequent chants of  _what do we want?_ and the answering calls of the crowd, not to mention the stamping feet, clapping hands and the million other sounds all crashing together, Kate finds herself wishing she'd had the foresight to pack some painkillers for her ever-growing headache.

"Well, it will be a serious blow to the environment if it goes through." Kate concedes. "I can't blame them for protesting."

Buffer throws a sideways glance at her. "Since when were you a Greenie?"

Kate squints, searching the crowd for her sister's latest hair colour. "Since Callista's probably out there somewhere, probably dragging Bridie along for the ride." She shrugs. "Hey, with my sister's strong principles, we're kind of a Greenie household."

Kate's phone beeps, and she digs it out of her pocket, half-expecting it to be Cal texting some obscure fact, or resuming the argument they'd had that morning about how it was Kate's  _duty as a global citizen_ to encourage a station-wide strike and join the protest. However, as she glances down at the phone, she catches sight of Mike's most recent message and rolls her eyes.

_I hear we're chaperoning the school disco together. Should I coordinate my tux to your dress?_

Letting out a sound halfway between a scream and a groan, she shoves her phone back into her pocket.

* * *

"What kind of school has mandatory parent volunteer hours anyway?" Kate demands of Bridie, reaching her hand into the washing machine and tugging out a stubborn sock. "I mean, I'm all for helping out the public education system and all that, but seriously... do they actually still need parent chaperones? I thought that was just an American thing?"

"Apparently they ' _encourage parents to familiarise themselves with all aspects of the curriculum_ '" Bridie recites, the quote sounding straight from some sort of information pamphlet and begins unfolding the clothes-airer. Kate watches in amusement as Bridie continues her habit of matching the clothes she's hanging up to the correspondingly coloured pegs; she's the only person she knows who has black and brown pegs in amongst her collection. "And anyway," Bridie continues, as she secures Kate's navy-blue bra with a matching peg. "Rose's Dad will be there, won't he? He seems okay."

Kate hums in a noncommittal fashion, but says nothing more, and Bridie turns to her, giving her a searching look that Kate doesn't much like. "Look," Bridie continues. "I know you have a hard time making friends and stuff. But he seems okay. Rose said her Mum died when she was a baby and he's kind of seemed a bit lonely ever since. Maybe it would be good for the two of you to get to know each other." Kate gives an involuntary shudder, dreading Bridie ever finding out just how well she  _had_  gotten to know him.

"I don't need to get to know anyone else." Kate rolls her eyes, passing over the uncomfortable thought and pegging up one of her t-shirts. Bridie pointedly swaps out the clashing pegs and reattaches them with blue. "Look, I'll... be civil to him." Kate adds. "But... he's a bit..." She can't quite figure out exactly what it is about Mike Flynn that rubs her the wrong way, other than the simple fact that he does.

"Okay." Bridie claps her hands together. "So, once the washing is hung out?"

"We're going out, little one." Kate finishes.

* * *

"Okay, that guy there? The one with the blue shirt and the glasses? With the laptop?" Kate fakes a stretch and turns, soon spotting the man Bridie had pointed out. He has the appearance of a stereotypical computer geek, although something about the feverish pace of his keystrokes gives the impression of great urgency.

"Yep." Kate murmurs as she twists back to face her daughter.

"Well," Bridie leans in close so that they can not be overheard. "He's a hacker, and he's stealing the cafe's free WiFi to access top secret NASA files and recode all the computers at Houston to play  _Can't Stop the Feeling_ every time they start up."

Kate snorts with laughter, although quickly stifles it at the curious faces turning to them. She takes a gulp of her coffee to cover the awkward moment, before scanning the people around the cafe herself. "Okay, well that couple there with the same pancake brunch and the matching his-and-hers collared shirts? The wife is secretly plotting to poison her husband  _just enough_ so that he gets sick and can't go on the cruise they've booked for the next month, because she thinks she'll have more fun with her best friend."

"Hmmm..." Bridie nods thoughtfully. "Dark family. At least my stories were lighthearted and cheery."

"What can I say?" Kate shrugs, before leaning closer and adopting a mock-serious gaze. "I struggle with internal darkness."

"Oh, come on!" Bridie rolls her eyes. "You're the biggest softie I know!"

"Well, then I'm an enigma." Kate settles on, draining her coffee and grinning. "Wanna hit up the aquarium?"


	7. Chapter 7

Every bone in Kate's body is aching as she closes the front door behind her and shuffles into the lounge room to find Cal perched on the lounge and digging into a bowl of ice cream. "You smell like smoke." She says by way of greeting, muting the television and shifting to better face Kate. Kate flops down on the lounge beside her sister, sinking into the cushions. Like pretty much all the furniture they owned, the lounge is second-hand, one Kate had bought at a garage sale and reupholstered. She picks at a loose thread with disinterest. "So, house fire?" Cal guesses, sniffing the air.

"No, it was a warehouse." Kate presses her face into her t-shirt for a moment and inhales, before wincing. Evidently the half-can of deodorant she'd sprayed all over herself wasn't enough to mask the smell of the fire. Barely suppressing a yawn, Kate closes her eyes and leans back. "We're pretty sure it was arson."

"Shit." Cal groans. "Anyone hurt?"

"Thankfully no. And we managed to get the blaze under control before it threatened other businesses so..." Kate trails off, taking a swig from a mug on the coffee table. "How was your day?" When Cal doesn't reply, Kate opens her eyes once more in time to catch Cal throwing a disgusted look over at Kate. "What?"

"You know that coffee you just drank has been on the table since you made it about 24 hours ago?"

Kate shrugs, closing her eyes once more. "The caffeine content is more important than the temperature." Kate defends. "Did you finish your assessments?"

"Yes! I tell you, psych is weird. But it was an interesting class today. It gave me lots to think about, which I am now suppressing with bad TV and ice cream." Cal beams. "You want to join?"

The honest answer is yes. Kate would love nothing more than to sit on the lounge for as long as she possibly can, but now that Cal has mentioned it, all she can smell is smoke. Perhaps a long bath, and then she'll treat herself to comfy pyjamas and junk food. "I think I need a bath first."

"Good call." Cal nods, before calling after her retreating back. "But don't forget Rose is here. Her Dad's going to pick her up in about half an hour so... make sure you're decent."

"What?" Kate groans. "Today?"

"Well, unless we decide to kidnap the poor kid, then yeah." Cal flashes Kate a look somewhere in between incredulity and amusement. "I don't know what your problem is with the guy." Cal turns back to the TV once more. "Truth be told, I kind of think he likes you, Sis."

* * *

She's not washing her hair for Mike Flynn's benefit, and she especially didn't shave her legs for him, or put on moisturiser and just a dash of perfume. No, she's earned the right to a little luxury, after the day she's had, and just because Mike Bloody Flynn has decided to insert himself into her life... well, it doesn't mean she can't pamper herself just a little.

She has just emerged from the bathroom when he knocks on the door, and even his bloody knock is annoying, an irritating  _rat-a-tat-tat_ that seems to drag on forever. Kate wrenches the front door open and glares at him, his fist poised in the air.

She has half a mind to leave him on the front doorstep, but she knows from experience that Bridie will manage to squeeze out another ten or so minutes of friend time before Rose has to leave. "Hi." He greets cheerfully, before adopting a frown on his face. "It's Kate, right?"

If she bumps him with the screen door as she opens it, it's completely unintentional, and it's with a small twinge of amusement that she watches him rub at the spot on his leg as she ushers him inside. "Coffee?" She's far from playing the dutiful house warmer; rather, she knows that if she at least has something to do, she won't have to talk to him. He nods, and she moves into the kitchen to flick the kettle on, not caring whether he follows or not.

"This is a nice place." Mike muses, looking around. She can't imagine just what he's complimenting - most of their decorative possessions are still packed in the boxes all pushed against the walls. But then he fingers a photo pinned to the fridge of a much younger Callista, cradling baby Bridie in her arms. She has to fight the urge to tug the photo from his grasp.

"Sugar?" She asks, in a sugary sweet voice, adding her usual three scoops of coffee to a mug out of habit.

"One, please. And,  _my word,_ that's a lot of coffee." He leans closer, peering into her cup. "I mean, you're barely tall enough to pass as an adult. I bet you still get carded at bars! And you're injecting what is, to put it mildly, a very severe heart attack of caffeine into your body."

"I work shift work." Kate answers simply, making sure to keep his gaze as she tips two scoops of sugar into her mug.

"Ah, see that's why I like being my own boss." Mike still looks distinctly concerned as he peers at Kate's coffee mug, but continues talking all the same. "I get to work whatever hours I choose."

"Sounds relaxing." Kate quips.

"You say that like it's a bad thing." He accuses, and Kate supposes it  _had_ been made to sound like it. "I guess I was just never one for following other people's rules."

"And why does that not surprise me?" She murmurs in a sing-song voice.

He grins, leaning slightly closer to her and lowering his voice. "And let me guess? You were that annoying kid in school that reminded the teacher about homework?"

"No." She doesn't shy away from his closeness. On the contrary, she takes a step forwards, so that they're nearly toe-to-toe, and despite the fact that she's a head shorter than him, he gulps and takes a step back, hitting her bench top. "I was the kid that punched out kids like you."

He tries his best to recover. "Ooh, anger issues as well. How cliched. So tell me," He leans back, looking too damn relaxed for her liking. "How does a woman like you end up a firefighter?"

"It was in my horoscope." Kate answers, almost immediately. She's used to giving answers like this, really. Used to the questions about  _why_ someone like her would choose a career like that. At least he hadn't called her a  _girl._

"Fine." Mike looks unaffected. "Then why did you move to Cairns?"

"The weather was nicer." She deadpans.

"See?" Mike jabs a hand in her direction. "You don't even  _try_  to be nice."

"Well, maybe I just don't want to make small talk with you." She points out. She pours the water into the mugs and sets his down perhaps a little too heavily upon the benchtop, before passing him the carton of milk from the fridge, taking her own coffee black.

"Would it be such a crime to get to know each other?" He adds the milk and stirs, before blowing on his mug to cool the liquid.

"Fine! What do you do, Mr I'm-my-own-boss?"

"Well, Miss I-pick-up-men-in-bars-and-punish-them-for-it-" Kate turns her head around quickly, making sure that the kitchen is free from overhearing ears, before glaring at him. "I make boats."

"Boats?" Kate repeats. Of all of the career choices, this is the last one she expects. "Like... model boats?"

"No. Like... real boats." He shrugs. "Have a warehouse in Manunda. I mainly make kayaks - they sell the best. But wooden dinghys as well. I mean, it's mainly a hobby for now. Although I do get paid. But for a job I own a fleet of pleasure craft and rent them out for charters."

"That's... interesting." Kate concedes.

He holds a hand over his heart. "Why, Kate McGregor, that's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me. And, I mean, it's a bit less interesting than chasing after pyros and sliding down poles but hey, I like it." He grins at her. "So... your sister? Is her head always wrapped in cling wrap?"

"Seems like it." Kate shrugs, used to Cal's frequent hair colour changes. "She's dying it who-knows-what colour."

"You should do yours." Mike grins, flicking a lock of hair over her shoulder. "Bit of turquoise and purple at the ends, you know?"

She pulls away from his touch, glaring. "Oh, so you're one of those guys who thinks it's okay to just touch a woman without her permission."

He holds his hands up in mock surrender. "I truly apologise, dear Kate." He flashes her a wink. "You haven't been returning my calls, by the way."

"Well, you're not saying anything I particularly care about."

"But what colour corsage will I get you for the school dance?" He makes a show of blinking innocently up at her. Kate rolls her eyes, before calling down the hall.

"Rose! Your Dad's here, honey!"

"Kicking my family out?" Mike presses, grinning as though this was the outcome he'd been aiming for in the end anyway.

"Oh, Mike..." Kate takes a step closer to him. "Rose is welcome anytime."

* * *

"So, are we going to talk about it?" Cal uses the giant stuffed bunny she's holding as a puppet, adopting a squeaky voice and moving the rabbit's head.

"Talk about what?" Kate tries to direct her question towards her sister, but finds the stuffed toy blocking her gaze. Kate finds herself wishing she'd just stopped playing the game when she had the chance, but it was so satisfying to shoot the toy ducks (and maybe imagine Mike's face on them), and Bridie had been more than thrilled to claim the prize. "Can you get that thing out of here?"

"Hey, you won it, not me!" Cal protests. "I'm just holding it for Bridie." They both watch as Bridie swings around, feet kicking joyfully in the air on the swing ride. "And anyway, don't change the subject. You were flirting with Mike Flynn!"

"No, I wasn't." Kate protests, batting away the bunny's accusing arm. "He's obnoxious and rude and really annoying."

"And kind of cute, in a let's-make-love-on-a-houseboat-in-the-middle-of-a-deserted-river kind of way." She hoists the bunny onto her hip, before poking Kate in the arm. "Come on, Katie! You deserve a little fun." Watching Kate's face glow in the light of the dozen amusement rides around them, she adds, in a decidedly more serious tone, "They don't all turn out like Patrick, you know."

"I know that." Kate snaps, rather harshly.

"Do you?" Cal presses. "Because every guy you've seen since Patrick, you've kept at arms length."

She doesn't want to get onto the subject of Bridie's father - not now, and probably not ever. So instead she shakes her head. "I... I don't have time for a relationship."

"You do. You're just stubborn about it." The swing ride slows, and Kate shakes her head.

"Look, I don't... I don't want to talk about this now, okay? Right now, I just want to settle into work and... and have fun at a carnival with my family, okay?"

"Okay." Cal nods, before suddenly wrapping an arm around her sister. "You know I love you, right?"

Kate grins and ruffles her sister's hair. "I love you more, Kiddo." She grins, before turning to the other amusement rides. "Roller coaster?"

"Adrenaline junkie." Cal mutters under her breath as they make their way towards the ride.


	8. Chapter 8

"Whoa!"

Kate groans and drags a hand over her face, steeling herself. She squares her shoulders and takes a deep breath, before turning to the group at large. She'd been hoping to escape unnoticed from the locker rooms, but of course fate is against her, and Dutchy's cry of amusement and humour draw the team's attention as effectively as if she'd been holding a slab of beer. Holding her arms out, she does a slow turn, prancing as though she is on a catwalk, before turning and grinning at them all.

"Okay. Let's get this all over now." She deadpans, allowing them to take in her ludicrous outfit. Of course, it had been beyond ambitious to expect to be able to sneak out in the brightest outfit she's ever worn, and she curses whoever decided the theme for the school disco would be fluro.  _Mike Flynn, probably._ "So, as you can see, I have coupled a fluro pink skirt with fluro leapord print tights, a neon green singlet and my lovely fluro boots. Finishing the look I have some fluro makeup, purple arm warmers and have secured my hair with neon ribbons in varying colours. Okay! You have 120 seconds to make fun of my appearance, and after that I'm leaving."

Instantly, the group begin talking all at once. 2Dads in particular looks like Christmas has come early. Only Robert looks disinterested, turning his back and continuing his walk towards the car.

"I'm loving the pink tutu."

"And the bright pink lipstick!"

"Where did you get the shoes?"

"And the skirt!"

Kate gives them their two minutes of appraisal before she holds up a hand for silence and fixes them with the look she uses when Cal takes her car without asking, feeling satisfied when they all quieten. "Okay, enough. I need to go chaperone a kids disco." She turns on the spot, her boots clicking satisfyingly on the ground. "And Dylan Mulholland, I swear if that was a shutter click I just heard, I will kill you."

* * *

"Well aren't you just the cutest." Mike quips, tossing a handful of glowstick bracelets in Kate's direction. She manages to catch several deftly, grumbling as she is forced to stoop to pick up the rest as they clatter to the ground. Straightening up, she sees he has threaded several around his wrist - moreover, they appear to be the exact same colours as the ones he's tossed her. "I was going to get you a corsage, but thought the glowsticks were more appropriate. Nice tights!"

Of course, she is forced to grudgingly admit (only to herself) that Mike  _does_ look good, and she finds herself wondering just how many men she knows that would look good in a pink fluro monstrosity like he was wearing now. It doesn't make him any less of a dick though, and she speaks the first words that occur to her. "I hate you."

"I know." Mike grins, as if she'd just declared love for him rather than the opposite. "Where's Bridie? Is your cling-wrap-headed sister bringing her later?" Kate gives a grudging nod and he beams even wider, before clapping his hands together and gesturing to the entrance of the hall, which is already decked out in fluro streamers and lights. "Now, Barb, Fiona and I sorted out the decorations before, so it's either manning the BBQ or selling tickets." He peers critically at her outfit, and she tugs the hem of her skirt lower. "You right to sell tickets?"

"What, because girls can't cook?" She demands, firing up at once.

"No. It's because - ironically, given your career - I think most of the clothes you're wearing look highly flammable, and I don't want you to set your pretty little fluro tights on fire. But, hey, you want to take the risk, go ahead. I'm sure there's legally got to be a fire extinguisher somewhere? Hey, did you check if the school was up to code before you enrolled Bridie here?"

Kate rolls her eyes. Of course, she  _had_ made sure it was, but she's not about to admit that to Mike Flynn. Instead, she settles herself behind the ticket table, watching as Mike struggles to light the BBQ. And she's not staring at his arms. Or the light stubble on his chin. No. She's only staring because... "See something you like?" Mike smirks at her.

"No." Now it's Kate's turn to grin. "But you've got to turn the gas on, Mike." She points out. Mike flushes, but otherwise says nothing as he heeds her advice and manages to light the BBQ. Soon, the smell of cooking sausages and onion wafts over, and children start arriving, all dressed in fluro clothes that all look, in Kate's opinion, as if they've come straight from their parents' wardrobes. She can't remember ever seeing anyone wearing this much fluro, even when it was popular, and the effect is quite overwhelming.

"Hi Kate!" It isn't until she's served close to fifty kids that she hears a familiar voice, and looking up, spots Rose beaming at her, dressed in a neon yellow singlet, with matching tutu and wings. "You look awesome."

"Thanks. You too." Kate catches sight of the earrings, and smirks at the bumblebees. "And you're a bee."

"Hey, they're still my favourite animal." Rose defends, shrugging lightly and fingering her stripy singlet. "Might as well promote them through  _dance!_ "

The older woman behind her chuckles, and Kate turns to examine her. Those same blue eyes and the wide smile leave her in no doubt who the woman is. "She almost dies of anaphylaxis and it's the bee she felt sorry for." She shakes her head. "And you're the famous Kate. Michael talks about you all the time. And I'm hearing amazing things about Bridie too. I'm Lillian Flynn. Michael's mother."

"Oh, hello. It's lovely to meet you." Kate takes Lillian's hand and shakes. The woman has a surprisingly strong shake for a woman of her age.

"Well, I'm just here to drop her off." Lillian turns around. "Good heavens, what is your father wearing?"

Rose follows her gaze and snorts with laughter. "He looks like Patrick from Spongebob!" She giggles, and Kate can't help but laugh too. Now that she looks at him, it's hard not to see it.

"Right, darling, I'm going to head off. I'll see you on the weekend probably." She presses a kiss to Rose's cheek before turning to Kate. "Nice to meet you." And before Kate can fully process the hurried greeting and farewell, Lillian wanders off, shaking her head.

"Oh, there's Bridie now." Rose grins, as she dashes off and returns a moment later with Bridie and Cal by her side.

"Cool, Mum." Bridie grins appreciatively at her mother's outfit.

"Geez, already coordinating outfits." Cal observes, as she takes in Bridie and Rose's matching outfits.

"We've got to look out for the bees." Bridie grins.

"Exactly." Rose agrees.

* * *

The disco itself goes smoothly enough, and Kate is left to deal with nothing more major than breaking up a game of glowstick soccer in the girls bathroom and a Year 3 girl with a broken shoe, and for the most part, she doesn't have to talk with Mike, what with the music blasting from all sides. At the end of the night, Rose and Bridie dutifully help to clean up the school hall (Barb and Fiona both mysteriously have  _other plans_ and have to leave Mike and Kate to clean up) before the four of them make their meandering way towards the carpark.

"Hey, can we go get some dinner?" Rose asks, broaching the question in such a casual way, though exchanging a significant look with Bridie that tells Kate they've been plotting this for a while. "I mean, it's Friday night, so it's not bedtime yet."

"You had a sausage sandwich." Mike points out. "A  _terrific_ sausage sandwich cooked by an absolute spunk."

"Yeah," Rose rolls her eyes, but says nothing, obviously used to Mike's antics. "But... Dad, can we please? All four of us?"

"Oh, Mum, can we?" Bridie adds, turning between Kate and Mike in turn. "Please!"

* * *

Twenty minutes later sees Kate feeling very self-conscious in her fluorescent get-up, pressed between Mike and Bridie in a burger bar. She's painfully aware of the easy conversation flowing between the girls, and the awkward silences between herself in Mike, but she keeps her gaze fixed on the menu, even though she knows exactly what she's ordering. She wishes she'd thought to pack a change of clothes in her bag; there's something all too cosy about her and Mike and the two girls all dressed the same.

"So, any plans for the weekend?" Mike grins, in that same, painful Mike Flynn way she swears she'll never get used to. "Or are you spending your days running around checking fire hydrants?"

"I was thinking I might ignore some of your calls." Kate raises an eyebrow. "You?"

"Oh, I might call you." Mike shrugs. "You know... leave heart-wrenching messages on your voicemail. Recite poetry... sing  _Careless Whisper._ You know. The usual."

"We're going to go to the lagoon on Saturday." Bridie chimes in, twisting in her seat to get a better look at Mike. "You and Rose should come, shouldn't they Mum?"

Kate rolls her eyes, nudging Mike's shoulder. "Alright, can I get past? I'm just going to run to the bathroom."

"Right." Mike adopts a heartbroken look, placing a hand on her arm. "But tell me this! Am I going to find you like all my dates? Halfway out the bathroom window?"

Kate twists around to face him, flashing him an enormous wink. "Only if you follow me."

* * *

Of course, she doesn't really need the bathroom. Just a time out to reevaluate what the hell she's doing. Is Cal right? Is she flirting with Mike Flynn?

"Get a hold of yourself." Kate hisses, splashing cold water over her face and examining her reflection in the mirror.  _Okay, you look like a fluro dork,_  Kate tells herself.  _Now get back out there and-_

It's then that she hears the sob coming from under the bathroom sink, and peering underneath, she quickly spots a young boy, maybe two or three, looking terrified. "Hey, are you okay?" Kate turns to the little boy. Instinct kicks in, and she crouches in front of him, smiling encouragingly. "It's okay. I just want to help. Can you tell me if you're hurt?"

He nods, then points to the locked cubicle, and his voice is so quiet, Kate has to lean closer to hear him. "Mummy's sick."

As if on-cue, the drier in the adjacent bathroom stops, and Kate catches the low whimpers from the cubicle. Kate moves towards the door and knocks, feeling the hairs on the back of her neck standing on end. "Ma'am? Are you okay?" She receives nothing but a low moan in reply. "Ma'am, do you need any help? Bang on the wall twice if you need help?" There's a louder, more gutteral cry.

Then a scraping of the lock being undone, and Kate comes face to face with a terrified looking woman, cradling her round stomach. With her eyes wide, the woman manages to gasp, "I think... baby's coming."

Kate doesn't have time to think. Kneeling in front of the woman, she starts to rub her back, the other smoothing back the woman's hair. "You're going to be alright. I'm a firefighter, okay? My name's Kate, and I'm going to help you. What's your name?"

"R- Regan." God, the girl looks terrified, clutching her belly, and she can't be older than twenty-five.

"Okay, Regan. I'm going to leave you for a minute so I can-" But the rest of her words are cut off by a scream, and Kate feels the woman grab her hand. "Okay, give me a second." Kate picks up her phone and hurriedly sends a text to Mike.  _Send help bathroom_  "Okay, Regan. I know this is uncomfortable, but I need to take a look-"

"Mummy?" The little boy is nearly in tears, rocking backwards and forwards, and his mother looks no better. She's still moaning, but permits Kate to lift up her skirt and look.

"How far along are you?" Kate asks.

"35 weeks." She whimpers. "I think I need to push."

The whole scene is chaos, and never in a million years did she ever imagine she'd find herself here, in the bathroom of a burger bar, coaxing a woman through labour.  _Come on, Mike,_ she thinks. In some distant part of her mind she imagines him opening the message. Would he think it was a joke? Maybe he'd chuckle, lock his phone, thinking vaguely of her comically stuck halfway through a window.

"Well, I need you to try your best to hold off for a bit." Despite the worry in her mind, she's able to keep a clear head, and the woman's panic seems to steady Kate. "We'll get you somewhere nice and comfy."

The door clatters open, so hard it bangs off the opposite wall, and a woman bursts through the door. "I was told someone needed-" She cuts herself off, staring in horror at the scene, and it's then that Kate notices the pinkish stains on Regan's dress. Her waters, probably.

"I have a woman here in active labour." Kate tells the waitress, not willing to waste any more time. "The baby is crowning. I need you to call an ambulance and I need some people to help me get this woman to... I don't know... do you have an office? Also, we're going to need clean towels, a sterile knife, gloves, and some warm water." The waitress looks barely out of high school, and her eyes widen. "Listen," Kate glances at her nametag. "Marlene, I'm a firefighter. I know what I'm doing, but I need your help."

"Okay." Marlene whimpers. She casts an anxious eye over the still sobbing boy.

Following her gaze, Kate gestures towards him. "Can you take this little guy with you? Get him some colouring in or something? Maybe some juice." Kate turns to him. "I'm going to look after Mummy, okay?"

"Go with her, Benji." Regan manages to choke out. "I'll see you soon, Baby."

She can't sugarcoat the situation for Regan, and turns to her as soon as Benji is out of the room, catching her gaze. "Now, listen honey, the bad news is we're not going to make it to the hospital. But the good news is, you're going to have a baby in your arms very soon."

"I can't have it here!" Regan whimpers, before her words turn into another cry.

Regan reaches out and grabs Kate's hand once more. Kate squeezes. "Have you got anyone else here?"

"No! My husband is away! I... I'm here with my son."

"Benji is going to be fine. He's about to be a big brother." Two strong looking men make their way into the bathroom. "Quick." Kate commands. "Help me get her somewhere she can lie down."

"Kate!" Mike calls as soon as she leaves the bathroom, but Kate is too preoccupied to talk, instead following as Regan starts to shake, supported by the two men.

"I can't do this here."

Kate grins, and points out the booth where Bridie is seated next to Rose, both looking panicked. "Regan, can you say that girl with the blonde curly hair? That's my daughter, Bridie. And she was in such a hurry to meet me, that I gave birth on the side of the road halfway to the hospital with a ten year old in the backseat."

"Bet your husband was freaking out!" Regan pants. "God, everyone's staring."

"It's okay. We're going to get you somewhere private." The men help her into the office and Kate hurriedly shoves the table against the wall, before laying down the towels. "Okay, Regan, I'm going to have another look. Okay?" She looks up. "How far out is the ambulance?"

"They reckon another five minutes." One of the men gabbles.

"Okay." Kate winces. "Okay, Regan, you're going to have to do this now. Okay?"

"But I can't!" She protests.

"Hey," Kate locks eyes with her. "We can do this together. Alright? Now, on your next contraction, I need you to push."

* * *

"Geez, I take you out to dinner and you deliver a baby?" Mike grins, bumping into Kate's shoulder as Regan, Benji and her newborn baby girl are loaded into the ambulance.

"Yeah, jumping into burning buildings not enough for you?" Nikki demands, as she claps Kate on the back. "Loving the outfit by the way."

"Yeah, where did you get the shoes?" Chris presses. "Because my daughter would really love-" Nikki rolls her eyes, shutting the ambulance doors and drowning out his voice.

"His kid is a year old." Nikki rolls her eyes.

"It's sweet." Kate protests. "I'll text him the link."

"Whatever!" Nikki calls back, walking to the driver's door. "But good job, McGregor."


	9. Chapter 9

Kate has only just finished putting her uniform on when the sirens come on, and Kate listens to the announcement as truck after truck are called into duty. "Shit." 2Dads mutters to himself as they all pile in the truck. "Sounds like a bad one. Why are so many trucks being called?"

Kate grips the seat of her chair, feeling her heart hammering in her throat. Something is wrong, and even though she's not sure why, she feels on edge. But it's Buffer that answers the question. "Because it's an aged care home."

* * *

By the time the truck pulls up, smoke is billowing from several broken windows. As they scramble down from the truck, Kate spies a team preparing to vent the roof. Her radio is already crackling, and it's not just Marshall's orders ringing in her ear, but other teams too. "Remember your callsigns." Dutchy reminds her as they don their gear. "Team Alpha, attack party. Team Bravo, we're primary search on the east side of the building. Let's go."

And then...

Her thoughts are just fragments.

Smoke.

Poor Visibility.

And the ever present Darth-Vader-like sounds of her own breathing through her mask.

And this is far from her first fire but...

A body, just to the right.

There's a body in front of her.

And it's far from her first body either but...

_But keep going. Keep going._

A door.

Not hot on the other side.

Break it down.

Empty.

Check under the bed.

In the wardrobe.

None.

Move on.

Again and again.

People.

A woman.

Light as anything.

Dutchy carrying her out.

And Kate...

Dragging another man.

Adrenaline spurring her on.

Get him out.

And do it all over again.

* * *

"Today was a hard day." Marshall's voice rings out as they lean against the truck, downing bottles of water and simply staring at the smouldering ruins. The survivors had long since been taken off to hospitals, or else triaged at the local church and plied with sandwiches and tea.

The dead had been put into bags.

Eleven people dead.

Burned alive.

Another five critical.

And Kate can still hear screams in her head.

"We may never understand this senseless tragedy." Marshall's words drone on in her head, and she's only vaguely aware of Dutchy's hand on her shoulder. "But I want it known here and now that I am extremely proud of everyone's efforts today. Counselling will be made available to everyone. But for now, let's clean up and head back."

* * *

"Evidently 3 o'clock means different things to firies, Eh?" Mike quips as he pulls open the door and spies Kate leaning against a veranda pole. "It's all good. Not like I was working anyway. Just answered your sister's call when the school called her, and collected your girl. Have you called your sister back? I think she was a bit worried you were barbecue meat." Then he catches sight of her face. "Shit. Kate?"

She doesn't want to cry in front of him. She can't. She's not even aware she  _is_ crying until Mike's face falls, and  _she can't break down here._ She turns and makes to run down the front drive, but has barely made it past the road when she feels sobs wrack her body, and her legs crumble. And every fibre of her body is telling her to run, to get away, because she can't stand to think about just how many people did get  _barbecued_  today, and Mike's words are just reopening the box she'd tried to shut tight when she left work.

"Hey, hey." She feels rather than sees Mike kneel beside her, and after hesitating for a moment, his hand starts to rub circles on her back. "It's okay. You're safe. Bridie's safe. Everything is okay. Shit."

She can still smell smoke, even though she knows she sat in the shower for almost half an hour scrubbing at her skin.

She can still hear screams and sirens and  _eleven bodies._ Eleven bodies of people who couldn't run and hide and get to safety, and-

She doesn't even realise she's hyperventilating until Mike grabs her, and he pulls her back towards him, so that he's sitting behind her in some bizarre parody of him spooning her. His hands encircle her wrists, and he moves them, tugging her limbs so that she feels nothing more than a children's doll, twisting and turning. "Okay, Kate, can you feel your heart beat? It's here, okay? We're going to focus on your heartbeat. It's under your hand right here. You're here, right now, with me. We're going to breathe in, and you're going to smell the... the grass, and the dirt, and... and onion, because I was just cutting them. Can you smell it?" He's talking nonsensically, but it's helping. "And we're going to breathe out, and you're going to feel your stomach move. And we're going to go in... and out. Breathe, Kate. Just breathe."

She doesn't know how long they sit there, in the middle of the road, and it's a miracle no cars come by, and she can't believe that it's  _Mike Flynn_ actually helping her. Eventually, though, she becomes aware of her surroundings once more.

She's tired.

She needs Bridie.

She wants to run.

She wants to stay.

"You okay?" Mike whispers, slowly releasing her arms. They fall, like limp noodles, to her side. She doesn't have the energy to answer. Or the words. Is she okay? "Come inside." He murmurs, helping her to her feet. "Come see your daughter."

* * *

"You want to talk about it?" Mike doesn't invite her to dinner. He doesn't ask her to stay either, but somewhere along the line he'd nudged a bowl of pasta towards her and unfolded a camp bed in Rose's room for Bridie. The girls had been tucked in and now Kate found herself huddling under a blanket on his lounge, while the TV drones on pointlessly in the background. She turns to look at him, not used to the concerned look in his eyes. "If you don't, we can just sit here and watch TV. Or, I can tell pointless stories. Or, I can make fun of you a bit if you want more... normal?"

She feels the ghost of a smile on her face, but it fades quickly. She's not sure whether she wants to do this. She likes the illusion Mike has of her, of a woman who simply goes and points a hose at a fire. She's not sure she can handle anyone else knowing the ugliness and the darkness she faces. Especially not him.

 _Especially_?

No.

Feeling are confusing.

Especially today.

"Want a cup of tea?" Mike asks. "I'd offer you coffee but not entirely sure whether that's wise or not? Uh, hot chocolate? Beer? Wine? Milkshake? It'll bring all the boys to the yard?" This time, she does actually smile, and he seems to take it as an invitation to lean closer. "I'm... I'm not entirely sure how I can help you, or... or even if I can. And I guess, even if I'm not a person you want to talk to, did you... did you want me to call someone who can? Uh... a coworker or... or Cal?"

"No, I'm..." She clears her throat. "I've... we've got counselling tomorrow." She ducks her gaze. "There was... there was a fire. At... at a nursing home." He nods, slowly, and she wonders whether he'd seen it on the news. "People... people died." She looks up, waiting for him to say something. But he's just looking at her, and she finds the strength to keep talking. "We were on primary search. We got a lot of people out, but... but the fire took over and we had to evacuate. And once the fire was out... we were retrieving bodies." She feels tears trickling down her eyes and covers her face once more. "Some... there were people three doors down from where we were searching when we got called out. If I could have-" She trails off and closes her eyes. She can still hear the roaring of the flames, the cracking of glass and popping of wooden joints. And then Marshall at the debreifing, assuring them they'd all done their job.

"There's always going to be the what-ifs." Mike whispers, and as Kate looks up at him, she is surprised to see tears in his own eyes. "Especially when you lose people..."

Kate wonders, as she has before, about Rose's mother, and as she looks at Mike she knows instinctively that she's not the only one in the room to watch someone die. "I don't know what to do. Please just tell me what to do."

"I don't know either." Mike admits. "But I'm here, okay Kate?" His thumb brushes against the top of her hand as he smiles at her, a fierce determination in his gaze. "I'm here for you."

She doesn't plan to kiss him. Doesn't expect to feel that same pull towards him. She doesn't expect the comfort she feels as she presses her lips to his, but it's nice to feel something,  _anything_ but this guilt inside of her. Until he pulls away.

And just like that, she's back to earth.

Just like that, she's made a fool of herself again.

"I'm sorry." She gabbles, pulling herself to her feet, one hand covering her lips. "I'll grab Bridie and-"

"Kate, don't-" His hand reaches out and closes around her wrist. "I... stay. But...  _that's_ not what you need right now. You... you don't need to worry about anything else right now."

"Shit." She curses. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I-"

"Hey, it's okay." He protests, wrapping her in a hug. "I promise, you're going to be okay."


	10. Chapter 10

Kate wakes to her phone buzzing somewhere near her sleep-muddled head. Muttering something unintelligable, she rolls over and finds herself tumbling off the edge of the lounge, landing heavily on the tiled floor. "Ow! Shit!" Kate curses, disentangling herself from the blanket and fumbling for her phone.

"Such profanity!" Mike's cheery voice snaps Kate to reality. "My ears are not a toilet!"

_The fire. Crying. Mike._

Kate pushes her hair from her face and sits up, blinking rapidly around at her surroundings. "So, evidently, you're not a morning person?" Mike quips from his spot in the kitchen. Now that she's awake, Kate can't see how she'd slept through the sounds of sizzling and scraping, or the hissing and grinding of the coffee machine, not to mention the bright light streaming in through the open blinds. "Got you a ridiculously potent coffee on the way." He smiles. "Feeling better?"

She has no mirror to take in her appearance, but judging by the light tickling around her face and neck, her hair is flying in every direction. She stifles a yawn, before securing her hair in a messy bun. "Sorry." The apology tumbles from her lips. She's not exactly sure  _what_ she's apologising for - crying all over him, or sleeping on his lounge, or...  _oh, God, she'd kissed him._ "Thanks for..." Again, she lets the sentence hang.  _Thanks for actually being human? For not taking advantage of me?_

"No problem." Mike nods. "Ah, here's a coffee. Breakfast should be ready in a few minutes. The girls are just getting dressed."

Bridie. "Crap, school. We need to-"

"Don't stress about it." Mike cuts her off. "Rose has a spare uniform she can borrow and the lunchboxes are sorted." Kate catches sight of Bridie's lunchbox on the bench next to Rose's, already packed. As Kate cranes her neck, she notes that there's not a plastic package in sight. Somehow, she can't quite gel together the image of Mike baking what looks like muesli slice and making fruit salad. "She said she wasn't allergic to anything. Now," Mike claps his hands together. "Would you like pancakes, or bacon, or eggs? All of the above?"

"Why are you doing this?" Kate blurts out, before realising just how rude that seems. "I mean, not that I'm not grateful, but..."

Mike shrugs and busies himself with the fridge, pouring juice into glasses. "You were having a tough time. You looked like you could use a little help."

There's a clattering of feet, and the girls appear. Bridie smiles as she catches sight of Kate, wrapping her arms around her mother. Kate returns the hug with just as much enthusiasm, breathing in that sweet smell of her girl. As Bridie pulls away, Kate plays with the end of Bridie's hair. "Look at you!" She exclaims.

"Mike braided my hair." Bridie reports, as she fingers the bright yellow flower on the hair tie securing the end of the braid.

Kate looks to Mike. The idea of him cooking and preparing lunches was one thing, but him actually  _braiding_ hair? She raises an eyebrow, but Mike gives an embarrassed sort of smile. "YouTube teaches many things." He winks at Rose. "I can also do all the dance moves to  _Let It Go."_

Partly to cover up her complete bewilderment with the ridiculously domestic situation she's found herself in, Kate glances at her phone and sees a text from Marshall.

_Counselling session at 10.30am._

"Full disclosure, I did look at your phone to grab Cal's number, just to send her a message that you were okay." Mike slides a plate across at her. "And while I was there I did happen to note the  _interesting_ contact name you've assigned me."

 _"_ I..." Kate hesitates for a moment, then shakes her head. "You're bluffing."

Mike raises an eyebrow and picks up his own phone. A moment later, Kate's screen announces an incoming call from  _Arsehole._

Bridie leans over and giggles. Kate stabs moodily at her eggs. "Thanks." She mutters sarcastically.

Mike gives her a sweet-as-pie smile. "Anytime, Kate."

* * *

When she arrives at work the next morning, Kate sees that the rest of the team don't seem to have had the best night either. Not entirely comfortable with spending the morning with Mike, she heads to work straight after dropping Rose and Bridie from school (because,  _dammit,_ even though Mike's done everything else, she can at least insist on dropping the girls off at school), and so arrives almost an hour before her allotted time slot. Buffer shuffles his feet moodily as he waits, both he and 2Dads looking distinctly puffy-eyed and hungover. As Spider emerges from his appointment, he too looks quite battle-worn. Dutchy arrives with barely two minutes to spare, tossing his motorbike helmet angrily onto the lounge and walking into the office as though the counsellor had personally tortured him. With each exit from the office, each person remained silent, barely pausing to exchange a nod before carrying on.

When Kate is finally called, she doesn't sit in stony silence, but she doesn't share her entire life either. This is hardly her first mandatory session; she remembers after severe bushfires back in the mountains, they'd all been instructed to attend, and she has no issue with them. She says how she's feeling, explaining what happened, and then she takes the advice and reassurance. It's not going to change her life, but it's not exactly making it worse either. The woman - Siobhan - talks to Kate about how life is fleeting, about the limitations of the job, and about Kate's own physical limitations. Then she talks of faulty fire sprinklers and poor organisation, as though she actually knows what she's talking about.

By the time she finally emerges, mercifully cleared for duty and a feeling a little less volatile, she makes her way straight home, thinking of nothing more than a warm bath. A note on the fridge reveals that Cal is at uni, and that there's leftovers in the fridge if she's hungry, before a tacked on,  _call me if you need me. Love you Sis._

* * *

She's not exactly sure  _when_ she and Mike became texting buddies - at any rate, he seemed to have abandoned his long-winded sarcastic voicemails in favour of multiple pictures of the kayaks he is building, or himself Titanic-ing on the bow of one of his houseboats. In between work, and sleep, and spending time with Cal and Bridie, she very rarely finds the time to reply; and realistically, what possible response is there to a video of him, sliding down a pole at the local playground with the caption  _training to be just like you._

But his current message is almost... normal, with no hint of his usual grating sense of humour.  _Movies tonight with Rose and I?_ No sooner has the thought entered her mind, then another message comes through, completely demolishing Mike's newly-achieved mature persona.  _Movie is strictly PG, so you'll have to refrain from getting handsy with me during the pre-movie ads. Just in case that's a deal breaker._

Now  _that_ sounds more like the Mike she knows. Somehow, the joking makes her feel more at ease, especially after his period of acting the solemn and serious friend. Acting? No, being. And  _friend_?

Is he becoming her friend?

And why doesn't she feel more apprehensive about that?

* * *

"You're crinkling." Kate observes as she settles herself in the seat beside Mike.

"Shh!" Mike rolls his eyes. "Narc." Looking around carefully, he seems to check for any workers around before extracting a bag of maltesers, a bag of skittles and a tube of Pringles from the inside pocket of his jacket. Kate can't help but burst into laughter, and Mike shushes her once more. "If you get us busted, McGregor, so help me..."

"You snuck all of that in?" Kate scoffs incredulously. Mike raises an eyebrow and gestures towards Rose, who gives a tired look, but extracts several more packets of junk food from her own clothing. "And here I was wondering why you were both wearing jackets."

"Hey, you'll be singing a different tune when you decide you want some snackage." Mike grins, before thrusting a packet in her direction. "Choccy?"


	11. Chapter 11

"You awake?" Kate cracks one eye open to peer at Cal's silhouette in the doorway. It's not exactly unusual to see her younger sister hovering in her doorway; after all, Cal had suffered from sleepless nights and terrible dreams for as long as Kate could remember, usually up until after midnight before sleeping until noon unless woken. Truth be told, Kate had suffered from them too - for a long time, only feeling safe if she had Cal with her. But now, they were both grown up, and the nighttime wake ups were few.

"Yeah. Come in." Kate murmurs softly, rolling over just in time to see Cal make her way to the edge of the bed and sink onto Kate's mattress.

"Urgh. I don't know how you can stand to sleep under all these blankets. It's hot just being above the sheets." Cal fans herself dramatically with a hand. Kate rolls her eyes, even though she knows Cal won't see; they've had this same conversation at least a dozen times in the last few months alone. "Anyway, how are you?"

Kate squints in the direction of the glowing red digits of her alarm clock. "And you're seriously coming into my room at one o'clock in the morning to ask me that? Is this really the time for the cosy little catch-up?"

"Well, since we struggle to actually have a conversation about the heavy stuff without Little Ears listening in,  _yeah_!" She shuffles closer to Kate, her hair tickling Kate's ear. She swipes a hand at it. "I know you had a tough time of it lately. Are things... better?"

It's easier to talk in the dark. She's always found that. Easier to spill her darkest secrets and fiercest worries. And of course, this would have weighed on Cal for a long time too. Callista, the worry-wart. "It was... a really bad fire. And I kind of... just needed to process. You know how I get sometimes." Kate bumps her shoulder into Cal's. "I'm sorry I didn't call you, Squirt."

"It's okay." Cal hesitates, then murmurs, "I didn't put my foot in it, did I? Calling Mike? I just knew you'd had Rose over here before and... well, you guys have been hanging out a bit lately. And I couldn't get there to pick her up."

"No, it was... he... he was actually pretty good."

"So... so you trust him then? I kept thinking afterwards I should have... should have left my classes and cancelled at work and just gone to get her. I mean, she must have been scared anyway, and-"

"I trust him." Kate cuts off Cal's ranting. "I mean, he's... he's an arrogant, sarcastic pain in the arse sometimes but... but he's a great father to Rose and... and when it comes to the serious stuff he's... he's pretty good." Somewhere in her mind, she can almost see the smug look on Mike's face that would surely eventuate if he ever heard her say that, and vows never to tell him.

"Good enough to be something more than a friend?" Cal presses, in that annoyingly sing-song voice she has whenever she suggests Kate start to date again.

Kate's voice is muffled slightly by her pillow as she moves. "I don't date friends, Cal. You know that."

"Kate..."

"No." Kate shakes her head. "I... I don't want to talk about... about things in the past. I just..." Kate sighs, trying to bring her heartbeat back to normal. "Enough about me, anyway. What's got you awake at this hour?" Cal ducks her head slightly, and Kate keeps talking. "I know sometimes, a lot of the responsibility falls to you to help me with Bridie. Sometimes... well, I wish you could just be a normal twenty-year-old sometimes."

"When have we ever been normal?" Cal quips drily.

"Yeah, well..." Kate chooses her words carefully. "I just... I don't want what... what happened to me to... to stop you from making friends."

There's silence for several long moments. Then Cal says defensively. "I have friends."

Kate knows that she's not exactly being tactful, but she can't hide her worry. "Friends that you see outside of class? I mean, you're either working, or protesting, or at school or here with Bridie and... I just want you to have fun, you know? More fun than flirting with people and then just running away when they actually show an interest."

"Kate, when you were twenty, you were raising a ten year old and a baby." Cal points out. "You've been caring for me since I was born. You're hardly one to lecture me on a normal childhood."

"I know. I just... I want you to be happy, okay?"

"I'm okay, Kate." Cal stretches her arms above her head and yawns widely. "Can I stay here tonight?"

"Sure." Kate murmurs, brushing Cal's hair with her fingers in a routine sort of way. "But I'm leaving my blankets on."

* * *

When she wakes, it's to see that Bridie has also crawled into her bed halfway through the night. Careful not to wake them both, Kate slips from the bed and pads towards the bathroom, socks slipping on the tiled floor. After getting changed and making a super-strong coffee she climbs into her car and drives the short distance to the station. Her car is one of the first of their team's in the carpark, and she makes her way straight to the gym, intent on burning some of her excess energy off.

To her surprise though, she's not the only one in there, despite the early hour. As she enters she spots Buffer in the corner, lifting weights that look to be about Kate's own weight with absurd ease. Feeling a little self conscious but determined all the same, Kate makes her way to the treadmill and keys in her preferred speed. Neither of them talk as Kate runs on the treadmill and Buffer continues with his own workout, until finally Kate finishes her half an hour of running and begins to slow down to a walk.

"You going to have enough energy for the day now?" Buffer enquires as she swipes several sweaty clumps of hair from her face.

Kate eyes him suspiciously. She still didn't know what to make of Buffer sometimes. Half the time, he was an annoyingly sweet guy, but other times (generally when he declared he was quitting smoking), he was quite difficult to get along with. "Is this another loaded sexist comment because I'm the newbie?" She frowns.

He puts his hands up in defence. "Hey, I come in peace! Just... trying to make conversation." He clears his throat awkwardly. "I know, we didn't exactly get off on the right foot. I'm... I'm not used to working with women."

Kate shrugs, knowing the comment isn't intended to be an insult. "Well," She declares, "I'll have a shower, then hit up the coffee place down the road and be good to go." She grins.

Buffer nods, a grin adorning his face. "Ah, so does that mean you'll have enough energy to come out with us tonight, or are you blowing us off again for your new boyfriend?"

"What boyfriend?" Kate adjusts her shoes, knowing full well who he's talking about. "I... I don't have a boyfriend!"

His smile slips somewhat. "I... I just thought... you'd been seeing that Mike guy that was around here a few weeks ago. I thought you guys were an item." He shrugs. "I... I guess I got that wrong?"

"Well... we're not. Our... our kids are friends, that's all."

"Oh... okay." Buffer hesitates for a moment, then stands up, and Kate guesses that whatever progress they'd just made had been stunted once more. "Well, I'd... I'd better get ready."

And as he exits the gym, Kate feels her good mood dissolve.

* * *

She ignores Mike's texts. Mercifully, it's the weekend, so at least she's spared Bridie and Rose's plotting at school, but she still has to contend with message after message from him. Truth be told, she's not entirely sure  _why_ she's ignoring him, except that something in the way Buffer had called Mike her boyfriend had made her feel... what? Weak? Foolish? Stupid? And it's not as if Mike has done anything wrong. She just can't stand to have him assume that this friendship is going to turn into anything else. Because it can't. And it won't.

She's let the lines blur too much in recent weeks, and now she needs to regain control, needs to put some distance between herself and Mike. Forcing her gaze away from her phone, she turns back to the truck. She'll message him after work, she reasons. A hasty apology for not being able to reply, a reminder about her intensive work hours, and a vague promise about some sort of future outing. Strictly professional, of course.

She can't date him. She can't.

"Whoa!" 2Dads gives a low whistle as he watches Kate scrubbing bitterly at a stubborn piece of dirt on the truck. "Someone's pissed off. Sister trouble again?"

"What?!" Kate demands, spinning around and fixing him with an intense glare. She's satisfied when she sees 2Dads recoil slightly and take a step back.

"Uh..." He mumbles lamely. "I just meant... well, you seem a bit..."

"A bit  _what_?!" Kate challenges, taking a step closer.

"Nothing." 2Dads backs away. "As you were." As he turns away, she just manages to catch his muttered  _what's her problem_?

She knows of course, that this is a short-lived victory. 2Dads will, inevitably, tell everyone he can about her personal problems (usually inventing the issue of his choosing) which will in turn shoot her in the foot, but in the here and now, it's at least somewhat satisfying to see him wary of her.

* * *

Of course, she'd known she couldn't avoid Mike forever. He's stubborn, and determined and annoying, and  _of course_ he's come to confront her here at work, when she can't run away from him. But she had been expecting at least a day or two before he'd show up looking for her. And of course he shows up  _now,_ just as she's stopped her manic day and taken her break with a coffee and a deck of cards. Moving just short of the table, he raises an eyebrow. "You've been avoiding me."

"I've been busy." She replies coolly, all-too-aware of Buffer's gaze in their direction. She wonders vaguely whether Mike being here is adding to the story 2Dads has no-doubt strung, or whether Buffer is genuinely curious. Either way, she can't find the energy to talk to Mike right now.

"Yeah, you look it." Mike nods sarcastically at the stack of cards in front of her. "You look bloody flat out. Can you spare a second to trade insults with me, or should I book an appointment with the guy at the front desk?"

"What do you want?" Kate crosses her arms against her chest, but regrets it a second later as she sees Mike flinch as though she's yelled at him.

"Came to see if you wanted to grab a coffee? Split a danish? If you're good, I'll even shout you an icecream." His smile slips somewhat. "Have I done something wrong?" She doesn't want to look at him, doesn't want to see the hurt and confusion in his eyes, so she keeps playing her game of Solitaire, successfully putting away a two of spades and a three of diamonds before he speaks again. I thought we were... were good. And then now you seem to be avoiding me like the plague and I don't know what I've done."

"Not everything is about you." She knows she sounds like a bitch, but she can't stop herself.

"Well, then what? Are you okay?" He presses, effectively ensuring that everyone in the room is looking at her. Kate curses softly, then grabs his hand and drags him outside towards the side of the building, away from the suffocating stares of her team. "Geez. Gentle!" Mike folds his arms.

"You can't just show up to my workplace and expect me to share jokes with you." She snaps, jabbing an accusing finger in his direction.

"I... I just thought... if you were able to take a break-"

"Well, I can't." She shakes her head and takes a step back towards the station. "So if that's it-"

"Okay." Mike shrugs, plastering his boisterous grin back on his face. "I... what about dinner, then? My shout."

"I'm not a charity case!" The words tumble from her without conscious thought. Mike looks taken aback.

"I didn't say you were."

"Well then, why do you suddenly want to hang out all the time? I'm not some lost little puppy on the street corner!" She can't even explain to herself why she's angry. She just needs him to go, can't have any more complications in her life.

A twisted smile flits across his face. "Well, if you were, you'd bite." Kate rolls her eyes, and Mike coughs. "Oh, come on, Kate. Do I really have to say it?" Mike leans closer. "I like you. And I want to spend time with you."

This is the last thing she'd been expecting, even after all the talk of Mike being her boyfriend. "Why?" She demands.

"I don't know." Mike shrugs. "I... I like the little things. I like arguing with you. I like seeing you roll your eyes and laugh. I... I just like you, okay?"

She feels her stomach clench. This is exactly what she'd been afraid of. Him, feelings. Unless...

But no.

No.

She doesn't feel the same.

Does she?

Before she's even contemplated a possible reaction, let alone a response, Mike catches her gaze, staring at her with an intensity she's never seen before. Then, not taking his eyes off her, he gets down on one knee.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" Kate chokes, moving to grab his arm before someone else sees and very nearly sending them both crashing to the ground. "Mike!"

"Relax!" Mike winks, fiddling with his shoe. "Just tying my laces." He flashes her a truly wicked style that tells her he knew exactly what he was doing.

"You did that on purpose, didn't you?" She accuses, trying to smother the laughter on her face.

"Maybe." He grins. "So... the next time you have a day shift off, maybe... maybe we can have lunch together? You can even pay if you want."

"Lunch?" Kate hesitates.

"Yeah, it's a meal between breakfast and dinner?" He rolls his eyes. "And in case  _that_ needs to be spelt out, Kate, I'm trying to ask you out on a date." He grins at her.

"I..." But a distant alarm sounds, panicking her. She can't do this, can't date another friend and lose him too. Before she's had the chance to run through every complex emotion of this wholly unexpected scenario, she realises that the bells aren't just in her head, and Kate turns as she hears everyone gearing up. "I have to go."

"Okay." Mike ducks his head. "Go save the world, Kate."

* * *

"Well, someone looks happier." Dutchy quips as he catches sight of Kate. "Look at you, grinning to yourself."

"Oh, piss off." The truth is, she can't quite figure out this whole situation, can't fathom that Mike has just asked her out.

But it's not that simple. If it were an equation of Mike plus Kate, then the answer would have been yes. But it wasn't. There was Bridie and Rose to think about, not to mention Cal and Kate's work and Kate's million other hang-ups still affecting her today.

 _Push it out of your mind, Kate,_ she tells herself as the truck slows down.  _Focus on what you've got to do._

For a moment, it's all she can do to take in the scene. Then she realises that the tiny car is wedged tight between the truck and the concrete bollard of the side of the road, and she finds herself suddenly immersed in the emergency.

"Okay, Kate, Dutchy, 2Dads, ET, get the truck secured and check out the driver." Marshall commands, splitting them up. "Buffer, Charge, Spider, we're going to try and get the people in the car out. Everyone good?"

* * *

It's a miracle no one is seriously hurt. From all reports, the truck driver seemed to have fallen asleep at the wheel, nudging a sedan into the left-hand bollard before braking so hard his engine seized. Mercifully all four passengers in the car were unharmed, apart from a few bumps and bruises, but were severely wedged until they managed to tow the truck out.

"Are you sure they're okay?" The driver pleads for the hundredth time, trying in vain to catch sight of the family next to him.

"Yes, they are Jorge," Kate assures him. "I promise, they're okay. They're all good. Just a bit stuck. But they're fine. We're almost ready to tow the truck out, and then we'll be able to get them out too."

He nods frantically, and Kate claps him on the shoulder, ready for this day to be over.

* * *

"You guys almost ready to go?" Buffer asks as Kate jumps down from the cab door.

"Yeah, just about." Kate nods. "Driver's fine too. Everyone's just a bit stuck. Jorge's door is jammed shut too." She catches sight of Buffer's face. "What's up?"

"Oh, nothing." Buffer shrugs, as he watches 2Dads and Spider securing the tow rope. "Just... the guy looks familiar somehow. But I can't pick it."

"Must be one of those faces." Kate muses, as 2Dads gives the thumbs up. "We ready to go?"

* * *

"I need to apologise to them. God, I could have killed them." Jorge is still babbling as he sits on the stretcher in the ambulance getting checked out. "Are they okay?" He catches sight of Buffer leading four people towards them, and sits up straighter. "Oh, guys I'm so so sorry! Ah, are you sure you're okay?" He catches sight of the two teenage girls lingering. "Oh, God, I almost killed you all. I'm so sorry-"

"It's okay." The man assures Jorge. "No harm done. Bit of an eventful start to our holiday but I'm sure we'll get over it." And then he spots Kate and freezes. And this isn't real.  _He_ isn't real. This is an old nightmare, with those black eyes peering at her while she stands, frozen, trying desperately to make him disappear. Because he's not really here. He can't be.

But it's his wife who spots her, and her eyes light up as she rushes over, already gabbling excitedly. "Kate? Katie, is that you?" She's suddenly enveloped by warm arms, and she needs to get away, needs to be away from him. "It's so good to see you, honey."

Buffer looks between them, frowning. "You... you guys know each other?"

"Of course!" Maddie smiles, wrapping an arm around Kate. "This one was like another daughter to us." Maddie's smile is too wide, her kindness and happiness too genuine as she turns to her husband. "Right, Patrick?"


	12. Chapter 12

Kate stands with her back to the truck, hands digging into her thighs as though it's the only thing stopping her from spinning away into the universe. She'd grown, toughened up since she last saw them, but something in the way they looked at her has her feeling barely a day over eighteen.

_I've seen the way you look at me._

He's here. He's here, in her safe space. Here, in the same town as Callista and Bridie, and she wants nothing more than to pack up all their possessions and run again. He's talking to her coworkers, and his voice is that same gravelly murmur that sends the hairs on her neck on end.

_We both know it would kill Maddie to find out what we did._

He's here, barely thirty metres away, laughing and joking while the illusion of safety shatters around her.

_It'll be our little secret._

"Kate?" Kate jumps at the nearby voice, letting out an involuntary gasp of shock, her water bottle slipping from her grip. It hits the tarmac with a heavy metallic thud and rolls away from her. 2Dads stops it with a boot, stooping to pick it up and hold it, a little scratched, back to her. "Crap. Sorry! Didn't mean to scare you." 2Dads peers tentatively at her, and Kate deduces that he's still a little wary after she told him off that morning. In terms of experience. "Ah, Dutchy wants to know how much longer you reckon before we get the road cleared up?"

Work. Work is a safety ring keeping her above water. At least she can focus on that. Because she knows how to be a firefighter, knows how to clean up fuel spills and organise the removal of broken glass and whatever else needs to get done. Sucking in a deep breath, Kate takes in the scene. The vehicles have been towed away, but the detritus of the crash still laden across the road. They'd managed to open up the second lane of traffic again, and cars were steadily streaming past, all slowing to goggle at the scene. "We could be here a while." She muses.

2Dads nods glumly. "Yeah, I guessed as much. Oh well..." He flashes a wink in her direction. "I guess I didn't become a firefighter just to get the girls."

Kate rolls her eyes, but the comment brings a smile to her face anyway, and she feels some of the tension ebbing away. "The family from the car... are they still here?" She's not entirely sure she wants to hear the answer. All she knows is, she'd felt safe in this town before he'd appeared, and now it felt as though she'd missed a step going down a staircase.

2Dads looks at her, and there's a shadow of concern on his face. "I think the woman wanted to hang around and wait for you, and I think the rest of them are there waiting for an Uber or whatever." 2Dads catches her expression and frowns. "Is that a problem?"

"I... I just..." Kate shakes her head. "I..."

"I'm not completely oblivious." 2Dads leans closer, so that as Spider approaches to collect something from the truck, he can't hear. "You didn't seem all that keen to see them. I can get rid of them if you want."

"I..." Kate runs a hand through her hair. "I can't... I just..." She feels her breathing start to speed up. "Dammit." She turns around and starts walking, one hand on her heart. She's not entirely sure of where she's going, only that she needs to put as much distance between herself and Patrick.

There's a scuffing of boots, and Kate knows that 2Dads has jogged after her, and she can't even begin to feel embarrassment that he's seeing her come undone like this, or that she's freaking out at work. And then she stops, quite abruptly, and a memory of herself at eighteen echoes in her mind, of frantically stuffing possessions into her car. And Cal, poor sweet Cal, asking where they were going. She can't let him run her out of another town.

2Dads stops several paces behind her, and Kate wonders if he's worried she'll start to scream, or cry, or attack him. Then a crackle of the radio tells her 2Dads is keying his two-way, and she freezes. For a moment, Kate is sure he's about to announce that she needs help, or else to tell Dutchy to keep Maddie and Patrick away from her, and she doesn't have enough breath left to stop him. But a moment later, 2Dads says, "Hey, Buff. Kate and I are just walking up the road. I think I saw a damaged stop sign further up that looked unstable. If so, I might need some help to get it moved."

" _Yeah, best double check that."_ Buffer agrees a moment later.  _"Does she want the family sent on?"_

"We could be a while." 2Dads reasons. "Probably better for them not to spend any longer in the sun after the shock they've had."

" _I'll grab a contact number and send them on their way."_ Buffer says back.  _"Keep hydrated. The heat's a bitch today."_

* * *

"You didn't have to do that." Kate murmurs, aiming a kick at a rock. It skids across the bitumen, eventually coming to a stop just outside the breakdown lane.

"You looked like you needed help." 2Dads shrugs, shielding his eyes to look back at the scene behind them. "I'm not a monster."

They continue walking idly up the road, meandering slowly, and Kate can't stop the question that bubbles from her. "Did she tell you anything?"

" _Mrs-O'Flanaghan-Please-_ _Call-Me-Maddie_?" He shrugs. "Well... yeah, she did. I mean, she just said that you lived with them for a bit. You and Cal. And that you used to work at the pub the old man used to run."

"She didn't... say anything else?" What else could Maddie say? After all, he'd made sure she didn't say anything, hadn't he?  _It'll be our little secret._

"Aside from what a sweet girl you were and how much she missed you after you left town? Not really." He shrugs, then presses tentatively. "But I think she genuinely wants to speak with you. From the sounds of what she said..." He hesitates for a moment, then ploughs on. "Well, it seems as though she was a bit unsure about why you left town."

"Yeah, well..." Kate kicks the rock once more. "Some things are better off not knowing."

* * *

"How was work?" Cal flops back onto the lounge and wiggles so that her feet rest on Kate's lap. Kate ignores the blatant invasion of personal space and simply stares at her sister, her red hair bright against the muted paint of the wall. "Anything exciting happen?"

"Not really." Knowing that she'd have to give Cal something, or else she'd needle until Kate revealed something, Kate shrugs. "Uh, there was a car versus truck. But no one was hurt."

"That's good, I guess." Cal grins. When Kate says nothing, she looks up, confused. "It  _is_ good, isn't it? I mean, it wasn't a carload of serial killers or Liberals, was it?"

"No, it was... it was good." More for something to do than any real need for food, Kate fiddles with the block of chocolate on the lounge next to her and snaps off a square.

Cal eyes Kate suspiciously. "Kate, I know when you're lying. I can tell." She leans closer, lowering her voice. "So spill. What's going on?"

She'd intended to tell Cal gently, if at all. But the words tumble from her in a rush, and Kate blurts out, "Patrick is in town."

" _What?!"_  Her jaw drops and she sits up so quickly that as she swings her foot around it very nearly clubs Kate in the head.

"He was... in the car. With Maddie and the girls."

"Shit." Kate can already see Cal's eyes darting around the house, no doubt mentally cataloguing whether each door and window were locked. Kate can hardly blame her; she feels like she's checked them at least ten times tonight already. "Have you told Bridie?"

"Of course not." Kate snaps.

"Well, did he say anything?" Cal presses. "Did he threaten you?"

"No!" Kate shakes her head, laying a steadying hand on Cal's shoulder. "He... he didn't have the chance. Maddie was... Maddie. I mean, she doesn't know and... and  _fuck,_ what's he doing here?"

"Well, we can't wait to find out, can we?" Cal stands up, and Kate knows that if she doesn't stop her younger sister, she'll soon find herself barricaded inside the house and armed with kitchen knives. "What if he followed you here?"

"He didn't." Kate closes her eyes for a moment, kneading at her forehead with her knuckles. "Cal, just... just sit, honey."

"How do you know he didn't?" Cal steps towards the blinds, peeling it back and peering out into the dark night beyond, as though expecting to see his face pressed against their living room window.

"Because I've been driving around town for an hour before I came home and no one followed me." She hadn't felt terror like that in years. And, God, she just needs him to leave. Kate can't stop the anger from filling her as she throws her hands into the air. "Cal, I'm dealing with it! I shouldn't have even said anything-"

"So... you admit it. You're scared too. Kate, you need to go to the cops! Kate, he's a psycho-" Kate pushes herself up off the lounge, cutting off Cal's words with a hand.

"Cal, we're safe here. Okay? He left the scene before I did, and he doesn't know where we live. And... and he wouldn't try anything. Not like this. It's not his style."

"So now you're defending him again?"

"Of course not! I... I just..." She rakes a hand through her hair. "Look, I need to check Bridie's still asleep."

"So that's it?" Cal slaps a hand on her leg. "We're not even going to discuss this?" She aims a kick at a fallen lounge cushion, sending it skittering across the floor.

"Discuss  _what_? I... I'm done, Callie. I'm tired. I just... I don't want to think about him."

"He..." Cal splutters. "We had a home, Kate! We had a home with Maddie and... and Sierra and Lila, and then he- he wrecked all that!"

"You think I don't know what he's done?!" Kate snaps. She's beyond irritated now, regretting saying anything at all. "But... God, I just can't go through it all again tonight. I just want... I just want to hug Bridie and sleep. It's just... I don't want to think about the past tonight."

"But it's not the past, is it?" Cal interjects, jabbing a hand towards the hall. "When his daughter is in the next room and-"

"What?" Bridie's voice cuts through the conversation, and both of them whip around to see Bridie, tousle-haired and pyjama-clad, standing in the doorway.

"Bridie!" Kate gasps, taking a step closer to her daughter and stretching out a hand. "How long have you been there?"

"Long enough." Bridie murmurs. "I... I've asked you about my father a million times, and you'd always tell me this story about how he was a good man..."

"Bridie-"

"But you lied to me, didn't you?" She takes a shaking step forwards, looking between Cal and Kate. " _Both_ of you lied to me?"

"Bridie-" Kate takes another step closer, reaching out for her daughter.

"No!" Bridie snaps. "Just... just get away from me!"


	13. Chapter 13

Kate opens her locker and tugs her bag from it, relishing in the fact that the day is finally over. Not that the afternoon sure to follow will be much better, with Bridie still refusing to speak to her, or even stay in the same room as Kate for longer than it takes to throw her a dirty look. As it has every time, Kate's eyes dart over the small piece of paper, Maddie's curly handwriting followed by her number. But Kate can't call her. No. She'd closed that chapter of her life for good. Now she just had to fix what was going on now.

Resigning herself to another paranoid afternoon of flitting between watching daytime TV and triple-checking the locks on her door, followed by a drive home with a moody and sullen daughter, Kate shoulders her bag and makes her meandering way towards her car. She's just touched the handle and tugged however, when her phone starts to ring. Glancing at the caller ID, she spies an unfamiliar number.

 _It's him,_ she thinks, heart pounding in her chest, and she hates how just a simple phone call can send her into a panic.  _It's him, and now he has her number-_

She stares, transfixed at the phone until it stops ringing, but no sooner has it indicated her missed call than it starts to ring again. How many times will he call her before giving up? And what could he possibly want to talk about? Their last meeting had been far from pleasant, after all. The second call rings out, and Kate breathes a sigh of relief when it doesn't immediately ring again.

Was this all he was going to do? Call her phone until she cracked?

A beep, and she sees a text from the same number come in.  _Don't open it,_ she thinks.  _You don't need to waste any more time on anything he might have to say._

But she's always been the type who needs to know, and she opens it with shaking fingers, expecting threats, or insults, or, worse, the pretence that nothing had happened. But the message is not at all what she's expecting, and Kate feels a new kind of panic rise up in her.

**_its rose i need help please call me Kate!_ **

* * *

Kate makes it to the school in record time, very nearly twisting her ankle as she dashes up the front drive and into the office, coming face to face with the same snooty receptionist who had handled her registration of Bridie. She barely suppresses her eyeroll, remembering how decidedly unhelpful the woman had been then, and instead plasters a sugary-sweet smile on her face. "Hi." Kate greets. "Uh... I'm here about Rose Flynn?"

"We didn't call anyone about her." The woman looks down her nose at Kate, and she remembers the snide comments about how young she was to have a daughter Bridie's age.

"No. Well, she called me." Kate explains, peering down the hallway. She's almost on tip-toe, trying to crane her neck and see beyond the woman, hoping to catch some glimpse of Rose, but the woman steps in front of Kate, effectively blocking her view.

"Mobile phones are not to be used during school hours." The woman recites the rule as though it is practically law, shuffling some papers on her desk in a routine sort of way. "And I'm sorry to say that if Rose has given you some elaborate story explaining why she needs to go home, then she's fed you a fairy tale. The girl is simply having an emotional afternoon."

"Well, I'd like to see her and be sure of that myself." Kate presses. And, dammit, she's tried to play nice, but she's a bloody firefighter and she's sick of being pushed around. "In fact, I rather insist upon that."

"Well," The woman purses her lips. "I'm afraid I simply can't allow that. First, Rose is refusing to give us any sort of reason as to why she needs to be out of class in the first place, and secondly, without parental permission-"

"Well, perhaps Rose simply doesn't feel comfortable enough to divulge her reasons, but knowing her, I'm sure there is one, and I intend to find that out. And as for permission, I'll call her father right now." Kate taps at her phone for a moment, before pressing it to her ear when a new kind of worry hits her. Perhaps Mike will drop her call, as she's been doing to him for the last few days. But apparently her worries are baseless, as she hears Mike's jovial tone greet her.

_"Kate? Thought better of our potential dinner-"_

"Hey, Mike." She cuts him off, not wanting to alarm him and yet needing to see Rose. "I'm... I'm actually at the school. Um... Rose called me. She says she's not hurt, but she just really needs to talk to me."

 _"What?"_  Predictably, Mike's panicked voice cuts her off.

"Um, the school doesn't want me to see her though without permission. So I'm calling you-"

_"Yeah, yeah. Put me onto them."_

* * *

Five minutes later sees Kate walking through the door to sickbay. The moment Rose sees her, more tears start to trail down her cheeks, and Kate takes the next few steps at a run, wrapping the girl into a hug. She barely registers the vaguely sarcastic comment the secretary mutters before stalking off. "Oh, darling. What's wrong?" For several long moments, Kate simply holds Rose as she sobs, her tears steadily soaking through Kate's shirt. And despite her focus on her current predicament, Kate finds herself wondering whether Bridie had cried like this after she had fought with Kate. For several long minutes, Kate holds the still sobbing Rose, who says nothing except the odd apology every thirty seconds or so.

When the tears starts to slow, Kate gently pulls the girl away so that she can look into her face. Her eyes are still red and her cheeks blotchy, tears clinging to her eyelashes in tiny drops. "Rosie, hon. What's going on, Sweetie?" She brushes a clump of damp hair off of Rose's face. "What's made you so upset?"

"I - I just-" Rose chokes out, her breathing ragged. "I-" One hand fidgets with the necklace around her neck. "I - I didn't - know who - who else to - to call."

"That's okay. I'm here. I want to try and help, Rosie." Kate perches herself more comfortably on the sick bed, peering at the girl. "Did someone hurt you?" Rose shakes her head. "Okay. Um... are you hurt?" Rose hiccups and mumbles something inaudible. "I didn't catch that, sorry Rose. Hey, it's okay, honey. You can tell me anything."

"Don't - tell- Dad."

Kate winces. She doesn't want to scare Rose, but she knows that to lie straight off the bat is not the way to gain her trust. Besides, there are a million different ways a conversation beginning with  _don't tell Dad_ can go, and none of them seem comforting to Kate. "Look," She begins. "I did have to tell him I was here. They wouldn't let me see you otherwise. But all your Dad cares about is that you're okay, alright? He's not mad, or upset. He just wants you to be okay." Rose nods solemnly, and even though she looks more upset, the next words she speaks sound a little clearer.

"I... I'm sorry - for - for calling. It's just... Dad gave me your n-number. If I need help and-"

"Hey, you don't have to apologise. Okay?" Kate smiles at her. "I'm glad you called. But I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong."

"I think -" Rose hiccups, and lowers her voice even more, ducking her eyes to her knees. "I..."

Rose's eyes dart to the door, as though expecting someone to come bursting through at any moment. Kate squeezes Rose's hand. "Do you need to go home? I can drive you home if you want. If you'd rather just talk to your Dad-"

"No! He'd... he'd..." Rose turns watery eyes to Kate. "He's trying so hard. And he's always there for me. I just... I... I need... help."

"Okay." Kate nods, her brain still running in overtime, trying desperately to work out what is happening.

"I..." Rose falters again, then says in a rush, "IthinkIgotmyperiod."

"Oh." Kate feels a weight fall off her shoulders. This, she can deal with. This is simple compared with all the other scenarios flooding around in her head. "Okay. Well, your Dad gave the school permission for me to take you home, if you want. So how about we sit here until you're ready to move, and then I can help get you all sorted out and explain everything you need to know, okay?"

"I... it's so embarrassing." Rose turns to Kate. "I didn't even know what was happening to me and I just... just hid in the bathroom at recess! I didn't know what to do. I started crying like an idiot and one of the year six girls brought me here. Bridie found me and I told her and she said it was a period but then she had to go back to class and I... I didn't want didn't want to tell  _her,_ " She jabs a thumb in the direction of the receptionist. "So I just... I put toilet paper in my undies but I don't really know what's happening and... and I couldn't tell Dad. I'm sorry!"

"It's okay!" Kate smiles at Rose. "And I know it sucks, but what's happening to you is completely normal. Okay?" Rose nods shakily, and Kate stands up, peering around at all the shelves. "Hmm..." She glances behind her quickly, before checking in the drawers as quietly as she can.

Immediately, Rose's eyes widen. "What are you doing?" The young girl looks more alarmed than ever, as though Kate is going to start stuffing medical equipment in her handbag and clean the entire sickbay out.

"Ha!" Kate tugs a pad from one of the drawers and grins, handing it over to the girl. "Now, this will work a bit better than toilet paper. If you go to the bathroom, you can just unwrap it and the sticky bit goes on your undies. Are you okay with that?"

"I..." Rose nods, looking as though she's readying herself for battle. "I think..."

"I know... I know it's scary, Rose. And right now you probably feel completely terrified and confused. But I promise you, we'll do this, I'll go sign you out. And then, I'll take you out for the biggest hot chocolate you've ever seen, and we'll buy the things you need, and I promise you, you're going to feel a lot better."

* * *

By the time they pull up outside Mike's house several hours later, Mike has already spotted them and has run out the front to meet them. Rose, who had up until that point returned to her normal cheery self after an afternoon of shopping and conversation, during which Kate did her best to answer any of Rose's questions about what was going on with her body. Although she had been embarrassed, to the point of looking mortified as Kate explained the differences between pads, tampons and cups, by the time they had returned to the school to pick Bridie up, she had warmed up immensely.

Spotting her father however, she pales slightly, scooping up the shopping bag at her feet and making a beeline straight for the front door, with Bridie, still refusing to speak to Kate, following. Mike looks as though he is about to follow her but Kate stops him with a tiny shake of the head. The front door has barely closed behind them when Mike turns to Kate.

"What happened? Is she alright? You've been hours! Is she hurt?"

"I told you, she was okay." Kate holds a hand up to quieten him. She turns around to make sure that Rose is definitely out of earshot, before lowering her voice and moving closer to Mike. "She got her period today."

"Oh." Mike drops his head in his hands, and it's clear that this is the last thing he'd expected to hear. "I... I didn't think that happened til she was like thirteen or something?"

"Well, she was a little freaked out. But I've explained things to her, and we've bought everything she needs for at least a few months. But I've got a whole bucket of information to dump on you too."

"Okay." Mike nods, his jaw set. "Then you should come in. Coffee?"

* * *

Ten minutes later, Mike looks distinctly overloaded by information, but nods all the same. "Well, that's a whole lot of stuff I didn't know." He shakes his head. "I probably should have done more research beforehand. I just... she's still my little girl." He stares vacantly at a spot over Kate's shoulder.

"Yeah, well growing up with two women, Bridie kind of learned too much too quick." Unable to reign in her curiosity, Kate glances over her shoulder and sees that what Mike is staring at is a picture of a smiling brunette. As she turns back to face Mike, he nods absently in the picture's direction.

"See, Sarah would have known exactly when to tell her all this stuff. Rosie... she wouldn't have had to go through all that at school." It's the first time Kate has heard him explicitly talk about Rose's mother, and she has no idea what to say to it. "When she got sick, she made me promise to help her with all that stuff. She wrote letters for Rose, even when she was in so much pain she could barely function."

"She sounds amazing." Kate concedes.

"She always wanted to be a Mum. We were going to have more but then she got diagnosed and-" He cuts himself off. "Here you are, crushing single-parenthood, and then there's me-"

"No." Kate shakes her head. Mike couldn't be further from the truth. "Bridie hasn't spoken to me in three days. I'm always working, or... or rushing around trying to get things done. I'm barely scraping a 'D' at single-parenting."

"Ha." Mike gives a dry humourless laugh, bumping her lightly with an elbow. "No one tells you how hard it's going to be. There's so many... decisions all the time. So many things to protect them from." He sips at his coffee, turning to Kate. "What's got Bridie upset?"

Kate swallows, feeling her pulse quicken, and she can hear  _his_  voice inside her head.  _You're okay. Just relax, Kate. See, we're having fun. It's okay. You're fine. Let's just relax._ But she doesn't even know where to start. She's not even sure she really wants to. After all, she can't stand for Mike to look at her and  _know._

"Um, I should tell you..." Mike continues, and Kate glances up. "When Bridie was hear the other day, the girls were on the computer. She was looking up a name. Patrick O'Flanaghan."

"Shit." Kate mutters, dragging a hand through her hair. She's tired. She feels beyond drained, ready to crawl into bed and sleep for a hundred years. "So I guess you know more than you're letting on."

"Look, the girls shut the page when they saw me, but later I went through the history. There was just some local news article about him coaching the local football team. But I guess the name means something to you? And to her."

"I don't know how she found his last name." Kate drops her head into her hands, kneading at her pounding headache for a moment. "Just spit it out, Mike? You want to ask."

"It's none of my business. But Kate..." Kate looks up in time to see Mike tip his head. "Look, you shouldn't... shouldn't beat yourself up. You just... if you were hiding it from Bridie... I mean, it's nothing to be ashamed of. So... so you had an affair. So what? She could still... maybe get to know him? I mean, if he's her father... well, it doesn't mean he's a bad guy-"

"What?" Kate pushes herself to her feet, feeling panic and fury welling in her again. "Is that what you think? That I'm ashamed because I had an affair?"

"Well..." Mike backtracks. "I thought..."

"You... you've got no idea." She has no energy for an argument. She feels as though she's been fighting this battle for years and years, and now there's nothing but a weary sort of resignation.

"Okay." Mike holds his hands up. "We don't have to talk about it. Listen... ah, how much do I owe you for today? You probably spent a lot and-"

Kate looks away, trying desperately to keep her tears in. "Just... keep your money." She mutters darkly. "I'm going to grab Bridie and... and we're going to go."

"You don't have to leave." He reaches out, catching her arm. "Listen, Kate, we don't have to talk about her Dad, okay-"

"He's not her Dad!" Kate wrenches her arm from his grip. It was infuriating to her that she could still feel like the bad guy. "He's never seen her! He never will! You  _earn_ being a Dad, okay?" Kate snaps.

"Okay." Mike shakes his head. "I'm sorry." He rises to his own feet, taking a few tentative steps towards her. "Is her finding out who he is really that bad?"

Mike flinches as he catches sight of the unshed tears in her eyes. "It's worse." She murmurs.

Mike nods, his jaw set. Then he holds out his hand. "Come sit?"

* * *

"My... my mother was abusive. She drank too much and she... she liked to pick fights. Usually with me." She can't look at Mike, can't stand to see the pity on his face. She's heard enough whimsical stories from him about his own childhood to know that he had lived a relatively happy life, so far from Kate's life. "When Cal was born, it was like... like I was her mother. She didn't change. I was the one up late feeding the baby, running home from school to check on her. I was the one that rocked her and sang to her and changed her. It was just... my job." She shrugs. "I raised her and went to school and... and I tried hard. I was smart. I got into ADFA and... and I remember feeling so free, knowing that I was going to get out from the prison of my house and... and make a home for Callie. And then... my Mum died. It was a car accident. She got drunk and drove her car into a tree and... and all of a sudden I was in a custody fight trying to keep my sister with me."

"You didn't have anyone else? Your dad?"

"I don't even think Mum knew who our Dads were. I was just seventeen, and all the money from the house went into paying Mum's debts. We had nothing. I was underage and pretty soon we both went into the system. Until we went to live with Patrick and Maddie. They were both foster parents, and they agreed to take both of us, even though they already had two daughters. Patrick... I got on with him the best. He was my friend. He was my best friend. He and Maddie looked out for us when no one else did. He cared for me. He... he had my back. He let me work, even though I was underage. I wouldn't... I wouldn't have been able to keep her otherwise. They were like parents to us. He was... he was my hero. Even after I'd turned eighteen they looked after Cal for me when I was at the academy." Kate sighs. "It was... it was Christmas. I'd come home and... and we'd just had a nice Christmas. Like a family. I mean, it was just the best day ever. We had the morning at home and then... Patrick and Maddie used to open the pub and give free meals to anyone that needed it. I was there helping. We spent all day there. And afterwards, Maddie took Cal and the girls back home to sleep and I stayed to help clean up. And then..." Kate closes her eyes. "He said we should open a bottle of wine, to celebrate. That I hadn't gotten a proper eighteenth present yet, and that it was Christmas. And I had some, and we were just talking." Kate gives a dry laugh. "I remember, we were talking about the Navy. I was excited about getting some practical experience when I went back for my second year. And he... he kept filling my drink. And I was really tired but the wine tasted nice and pretty soon he opened another bottle. And... well, I guess you can tell how the story ends. He... he tried to kiss me. And I remember pulling away and just being so... so genuinely confused. But he was bigger and stronger and..."

"Oh, Kate." He swallows, looking as though he's fighting back the urge to be sick.

"He was supposed to be my friend." Kate says through her tears. "And... and the worst part is, I didn't say no. I didn't fight him, or scream or kick. I just went numb. I... I stared at a scuff-mark on the wall while he pushed me against the bar. And then after, he just... just told me we should probably head back home, and I remember sitting in the car next to him just... just thinking that I must have imagined it, that it had been a nightmare or something. He... he sang fucking Christmas carols on the way back. And... and he asked me why I wasn't singing too."

"Kate, I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"How could you? No one knows. I... I left in the new year to go back to Canberra and... it wasn't until... until it became too hard to do up my ADFA uniform that I realised I couldn't keep telling myself nothing had happened. I... I dropped out of ADFA, I... I grabbed Cal, and put all my stuff in the back of the car, and we just... left. And I spent most of my time before Bridie was born working as much as I could so that I could save up. And then... and then I have to hear her asking about her father! And I told her some story about how he was a good guy because I couldn't tell her anything else! And now she heard me and Cal talking about him, and she's furious with me!"

"Kate-"

"And he gets a life. I had to say goodbye to Maddie, who was... she was like a mother to me. And... and she wants to know why I left town. And I can't tell her I was pregnant with her husband's baby! And Bridie! She... she can't know how stupid I was! She can't hear about him-"

"You weren't stupid."

"I trusted him. I let him into my life and he..." Her voice catches in her throat. "And then I see him and his family and... and he's still got those daughters, and the wife, and he's... he's free from it all."

"Hey," Mike shakes his head. "He'll get his, Kate."

"I was so stupid."

"You were just a kid." Mike assures her. "Okay? None of it was your fault."

"I drank with him. I... I must have said something-"

"Agreeing to drink wine with someone doesn't mean you consented, Kate. He did the wrong thing."

"I..." Kate swipes bitterly at her eyes. "I can never tell her. I can't tell Bridie the truth." She turns to the other side of the house, where she knows Bridie and Rose are, and feels her resolve strengthen. "She'll never know."


	14. Chapter 14

"Bridie, Cal! Dinner!" Kate punctuates her words with a thump on the wall, glaring at the bowls of spaghetti bolognaise on the bench top as if they were personally responsible for all her problems. Scooping a handful of cheese into her own bowl, she stabs at her food moodily with a fork. "Come on, guys! The food's getting cold."

She takes her seat at the table and picks at her food. Truth be told, she's not really that hungry at all, but she knows she needs to eat something or else she'll be up at 2am digging around in the fridge. Footsteps alert her that at least one of the girls is moving in her general direction, and a moment later Cal takes her usual seat opposite Kate. "Yum! I'm starving."

"Did you see Bridie?"

"Hmm..." Cal nods, her mouth full of food. When she's swallowed her spaghetti, she adds, "Yeah, she asked if she could borrow my laptop to look up something for a project. Said the desktop wasn't connecting?"

"Yeah. Because I grounded her and disconnected it." Kate drops her fork back into her bowl and resisting the urge to simply throw it across the room.

"Shit." Cal freezes, her fork hovering halfway to her mouth again. "I didn't know, Kate."

"It's not you I'm mad at. I'll be back in a sec." Kate pushes back her chair and makes her way down the hall. As Cal had said, her laptop sits neatly on Bridie's legs. Bridie lets out a squawk of protest as Kate lifts it from her. "Dinner's ready. And the rule was no internet."

"I'm not hungry." Bridie grumbles, choosing to completely ignore the second part of Kate's words.

"I don't care." Kate interjects swiftly. She's so done with being the bad guy, done with being ignored, or drowned in sarcasm and eye rolls. "I called you for dinner time. We're a family, and we're all sitting together." Kate glances at the computer to see what Bridie has been looking up. Patrick's name heads the search bar. "And I thought I told you to drop...  _this_." She waves vaguely in the direction of the computer screen.

"Well, you're refusing to tell me anything about him. So why shouldn't I want to know?" Bridie stalks from the room with all the attitude of a teenager. Kate growls in frustration, pausing only to place the laptop on the bench-top as she follows.

"Bridie," Kate addresses the back of her daughter's swishing hair. "I wasn't finished talking to you-"

"Well, I'm done talking to you." Bridie snaps back, eyeing Kate malevolently as she pushes her bowl away from her. "I've got nothing else to say to you until you stop being such a selfish cow and start telling me about my own damned family, unless it's to say how competely hypocritical it is of you to say we need  _family time-_ " She frames the words in air quotes, "-when it's you who's always got some excuse not to be here-"

"Hey," Cal slams her fork to the table with a loud clatter that makes both Kate and Bridie jump. "You don't talk to her that way!" It's the angriest Kate has ever seen Cal. In fact, she'd spent most of Bridie's life constantly begging Cal not to let Bridie get away with murder, as she normally did. It was always Kate who did the disciplining. But now Cal stands, arms crossed firmly across her waist and cutting an oddly intimidating figure. Her bright red hair seems to crackle with electricity as she jabs a finger in Bridie's direction. "You don't know the first thing about what's going on. Did it ever occur to you that we had good reasons for lying?"

For a full ten seconds, Bridie looks completely taken aback by her aunt's words. Then she seems to recover, folding her own arms in much the same way as Cal. "Oh, give me a break. This wasn't a tooth-fairy lie. He's never been arrested, and everything I've read about him says he's a good guy. Tell me there's a good reason for lying to me?" Kate says nothing, and Bridie leans closer. "See! Even  _you_ can't give me a good reason-"

"Enough!" Cal demands, just as loudly as before. "I don't even recognise you, Bridie! You have no idea what your mother's gone through-"

"Cal-" Kate interjects, her voice low as she turns to her sister. "It's alright-"

"No." Cal shakes her head, and as she looks up, Kate sees that there are tears in her eyes. "I'm not going to sit here and let her speak to you like that. Especially when-"

"Don't say anything!" Kate warns, her anger fading somewhat to be replaced almost instantly with fear. Bridie can't hear the truth blurted out to her in the middle of an argument.

"Why not?" Cal's fury seems to be billowing out at both of them now. "If she's going to speak to you like Little Miss Know-It-All-Brat, then-"

"Not like this!" Kate swipes impatiently at a tear running down her cheek. Her voice softening somewhat, she turns pleading eyes towards her sister. "Please, Callie. You promised." Cal still looks furious, but it seems to soften somewhat as she sees just how upset Kate is. For a moment, the two sisters simply stare at each other, and Kate wonders if Cal too is playing a million different memories of the two of them in her head.

"See!" Bridie protests, bringing Kate crashing back to reality. "More bloody lies! I just want to know the truth!"

"Bridie-" Kate reaches out, tearing her eyes away from Cal, but Bridie stalks past. Cal half-rises out of her chair, and Kate's not sure if she's going to keep yelling, or confess everything, or something equally as crazy. Kate uses her outstretched arm to touch Cal's elbow instead. "Just leave her, Cal."

Cal looks for a moment as though she's going to protest, rocking on the balls of her heel. But then she nods solemnly and resumes her seat, stabbing moodily at her spaghetti once more. "I can't say I blame her, Kate." Cal murmurs after a while, eyes still fixed on her plate. "I mean, he's an unknown entity, isn't he? I guess it's normal that she'd... I don't know... dress him up to be some fantastic guy. Remember how I used to do that? I mean, I used to tell you stories about how my dad was an astronaut or a policeman or something. She knows you, but he's this complete mystery and..."

"You tell me how I'm supposed to tell her." Kate cuts across Cal's words, instantly regretting it as Cal drops her fork once more. Kate runs a hand through her hair. "I'm sorry. I'm being a bitch to you, I know. I just... I mean, should I have told her? It seemed like the right decision when she was a preschooler begging to know why her Daddy wasn't ever at the Fathers' Day afternoon teas. It was easier to spin some story about how he was a good guy who had to live very far away. But now... now she's not a kid anymore."

"She's got the attitude of a teenager." Cal muses drily.

"Eh. So did you." Kate shrugs, a small smile flitting across her face. "I remember you telling me that I was stupid to call her  _Bridie_ because it sounded like 'bride' and marriage was an  _arcolic_  tradition. I  _think_ you were trying to say  _archaic?_ " Kate looks up just in time to see the embarrassed eye-roll. "She's always been a good kid. But this... it's knocked her around. I mean, if I had have  _told_ her. But... she overheard us talking about him. That's..."

"Yeah, I know." Cal drops her chin into her palm, looking glum. "It was all my fault. I was pissed off and yelling-"

"It's not your fault." Kate cuts her off, drawing her knees up to her chest and hugging herself. "It's mine. I should have eased her into it, maybe... I don't know, told her that her Dad wanted to be with me but I didn't want to be with him... or something."

"And then who'd be the bad guy? You!"

Kate shakes her head, and her vision blurs. A moment later, she realises that fresh tears are welling in her eyes, and she can't suppress herself from voicing her greatest fear. "Do you think she'd have been better off? If I'd given her up for adop-"

"No." Cal, who'd been slumped and glassy-eyed, looks suddenly wide awake, sitting up perfectly straight. "No. You're an amazing Mum, Kate."

"I was nineteen." Kate runs her hand through her hair again, her fingers catching on split ends. "Maybe... maybe it was selfish to keep her. Maybe if I'd-"

"How can you even think that?" Cal abandons her seat in favour of crouching in front of Kate. "You were a better mother at ten than... than  _she_ ever was. You raised me. You took me in, gave me your food when you were starving. You took my hits so I wouldn't get hurt. You kept me safe. You sacrificed everything for me. And you've fought every single day to make sure Bridie has the best possible home."

But Kate can't agree with that. Not now that everything is so screwed up. Not now she's hurt her daughter so badly she's not sure if Bridie will ever forgive her. "I was too young to have her. I was... I was nineteen. And... and the only support I had was my ten year old sister. I mean, I was going to give her to a family that could actually care for her. I wanted her to have parents and... and siblings and a Mum who wasn't screwed up. But I just saw her and I loved her so much. But... it was selfish. I... I was stupid to think I could do it-"

"Bullshit, Katie, you  _did_ do it. And, yeah, you thought about giving her up. But I saw you when you had your first ultrasound, and... and you were happier than I'd seen you in months. And when you first held her all I could think was...  _she's a mother. She looks like a mother._ " She leans closer. "It's not selfish to love your daughter. Please,  _please_ believe me, Kate. You are not the person in the wrong here. It was him. It was  _always_ him. He... he violated your trust and he made you question everything about yourself. But Kate, you are the best mother for her, and... and sometimes, especially now, you might not be the mother she thinks she wants. But you are the mother she needs. Please believe me."

Kate can't look into Cal's eyes. Even though her words  _are_ making Kate feel better, she can't silence the voice inside her hissing that she had broken her daughter beyond repair. She hates it, the endless cycle of fear and doubt and anger and confusion that has plagued her every night since that damned night. Especially when she knows he would feel none of it.

 _He_ wasn't lying awake at night tormenting himself with memories.

 _He_ didn't wake up screaming, feeling as though his weight was crushing her once more.

 _He_ didn't have to struggle with what to tell his children, or his partner or friends or family or... or anyone.

"You told Mike?" Cal begins, tentatively, and Kate looks up, twitching her head slightly in affirmation. She hadn't even stopped to consider Mike in amongst all of this. Well, in actual fact, she'd shoved him to the furthest corner of her mind, because every time she  _did_ think of him, a fresh wave of regret filled her. "How did he..."

"I shouldn't have." Kate shakes her head softly. "It was stupid." She pushes herself up from the table, heading to the kitchen and retrieving a bottle of wine from the cupboard. Just as suddenly, she replaces the bottle in the cupboard and slams the door shut. She doesn't want to be like her mother, doesn't want to use alcohol as a crutch. As she returns to the table, it's to see Cal has settled herself on the lounge again. She pats the seat next to her, and Kate takes it obediently, leaning heavily against the fabric.

"Why do you say that?" Cal challenges. "Mike's been a good friend to you."

"Oh, come on!" Kate feels herself growing irritated again, and pulls at a loose thread in the lounge. "Something like that? It changes everything. He's not going to be able to look at me without seeing me as some disgusting victim who-"

"That's not always what's going to happen."

"That's what happened when I told Lachlan-"

"Lachlan was a fuckwit from the start, anyway." Cal dismisses Kate's ex with a wave of her hand. "You were always way too good for him." Kate says nothing, simply twitching her nose, and Cal lowers her voice. "You said that you were okay with breaking up with him."

"Well, it was... it was easier, being with him. I didn't have to-"

"Feel?" Cal scowls. "Look, Lachlan was... he was an okay guy, I guess. But he was... he wasn't the birds-singing-all-the-songs-make-sense guy for you. And you never liked him enough to introduce him to Bridie."

"I never introduced anyone to Bridie."

"Except Mike." Cal points out. Kate chooses to glare in favour of pointing out to Cal that it was only because of Rose that Mike knew Bridie. "Look, all I'm saying is... this might be the first guy of yours I don't think is beneath you, and-"

"So you're saying I'm beneath him?" Kate interjects.

Cal gives a cheeky smile. "Look, you do whatever sex positions you want, but-"

"Oh, piss off." But Kate can't smother the smile that rises at Cal's words. "Thanks, Cal." For a second, she closes her eyes. At this moment, all she can fathom doing is simply sinking into the fabric and sleeping for a thousand years. But she knows that she can't stay there forever, and pulls herself to her feet. "I... I think I need to speak to Bridie."

"And what are you going to tell her?" Cal presses.

Kate sucks in a deep breath and turns to face the hallway. "The truth."

* * *

Kate can't help but look around Bridie's room as she opens the door. The room is small (although Kate and Cal's are not much bigger), but Bridie has well and truly decorated it to her tastes, and it's Kate's favourite room in the house. One wall is painted a bright golden yellow, the others a light grey, but in amongst the room are pops of bright yellow; her pillows, the photo frames on her wall, the shaggy rug in the middle of the floor. Bridie is visible only as a lump underneath the bright yellow blanket, and makes no effort to move as Kate perches beside her.

She has no idea where to start. After all, the story is such a long and complicated one. But as she rests a hand on her daughter's back and feels her steady in-and-out breathing, Kate feels a sense of calm wash over her. "I've... I've told you bits and pieces about mine and Aunty Cal's mother." Kate begins, and the lump twitches, just a bit. "Mainly that she wasn't a good mum. But the whole truth is that she was an addict, and an alcoholic. Most of the money she got, she spent on drink, or drugs. I was shunted aside and Cal... well, Cal barely had her attention at the start of her life, let alone in the throes of Mum's addiction. She was... she was bad, Bridie. Worse. Most of the time it was just cruel words she threw at us but sometimes it was... more. She... she broke my arm once with her bare hands. Just... grabbed me and wrenched." Bridie says nothing, but the blanket slips a little lower, and Kate catches a glimpse of her bright eyes through the messy hair. "She was using drugs when she was pregnant with Cal, so she was in the system before she was even born. But... for the most part, we were okay. Cal was born healthy, thankfully, and I was able to look after her well enough. But we were in and out of the system. And when I was sixteen, Mum died. She crashed the car into a tree while she was drunk, and we went into the system. Not many people want a teenager, and we were separated. And Cal... she didn't cope well without me. She'd... she'd scream and cry and throw tantrums, and I was the only one that could calm her down. So when we got offered a placement together, I was... I was so excited. No matter what sort of place it was, I could cope, as long as I had Cal with me."

Almost absentmindedly, Kate brushes a hand against Bridie's head, sweeping the hair from her face. Bridie, her eyes wide, doesn't shy away from Kate's touch, and she takes it as a good sign. "They were... were nice. They had a couple of kids around Cal's age, so she had someone to play with and I was... well, the father was kind to me. He and his wife owned a pub, and he'd let me work there, let me serve meals and tally up the till. And I know that doesn't sound like much. I mean, it was a job, right? A bit of money. But... when you're the daughter of... of someone like our mother, you get labelled as dumb, stupid, untrustworthy. And he  _trusted_ me."

"Why..." Bridie's voice is hoarse, and she clears it. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you wanted the truth." Kate says simply. "And... and I'd rather you hear it from me, than anyone else. Because I... I need you to know how much I love you." Kate swipes at the tears and continues. "I... I have never loved anyone as much as I love you. Even when you say you hate me, and you're hurting. All I want to do is protect you, Bridie." She takes another deep breath and continues on with her story. "So we got really close to them. It was like being part of a family, finally. Cal was so excited to have  _more sisters,_ and I was... I was glad I didn't have to be the parent all the time. And they were like parents to us. They... they listened to all our stories and soothed our nightmares. I loved Maddie like a mother, but him... he was my favourite. I told him... I told him all of my secrets, my fears. He was like a father and a best friend all rolled into one."

"What... what was his name?" Bridie asks, and her voice quavers. "Mum?"

Kate suspects her daughter has already figured it out, but says it anyway. "Patrick. Patrick O'Flannagan."

As soon as she says his name, she feels a revulsion so strong it's almost like nausea. It's something akin to blasphemy, to say  _his_ name in her daughter's room. Like a curse. Like she's just summoned a demon. Like, the moment his name left her lips, he'd burst through the window.

"Mum?" Bridie's voice shakes slightly. "What... what did he do?"

Again, she's sure Bridie has already guessed, but she needs her to know, to understand, to hear it from Kate. So she licks her lips and ploughs on. "It was late one night, when we were all alone, just the two of us. I was eighteen, I'd moved out and was back for the holidays. And he... he just changed. He held me down and forced me to have sex with him." Kate says the last few words in a rush, forcing herself to lock eyes with her daughter. And Kate can smell that awful dishsoap he used on the glasses staining the hand he clapped to her mouth, can see that disgusting watermark on the roof, can hear the faint Christmas carols from the other room. But she can't scar her daughter with those details. Not now. Maybe not ever. "After that," Kate continues, "I... I didn't trust anyone. I applied to get custody of Cal and as soon as I did I... I just ran." Kate clutches at a fistful of blanket. "I think I knew I was pregnant long before I... I accepted it. After all, I... I had no idea how to be a mother. I was terrified. For myself, a bit, but mostly for you. After all, how could I be a mother to you? After the only parental figures I'd known had put me in such horrific situations. And I decided I was going to give you up for adoption. Because you... you-" Kate's voice cracks, and she sees that tears are in Bridie's eyes too. "Because you deserved the best family! Parents and siblings and a happy, healthy, stable home. But the moment I held you in my arms, I... I've never felt love like that. And I wanted to protect you from everything that had ever hurt me, or Cal. And I couldn't give you up."

Bridie sobs, and reaches out to squeeze Kate's hand. "So my father... he's... he's a monster." She manages. "He's a rapist." Kate flinches. She hadn't known Bridie even knew the word. "And he's half of-"

"No." Kate cuts across her. "No, he's not half of you. You are  _you_."

Bridie shakes her head, tears staining her sheets. "I'm the daughter of a monster. I'm the... the result of a crime."

"No!" Kate says again, and she thinks she'll soon have spilled enough tears to fill a swimming pool. "No. This is... this is what I need you to know. You're  _my_ daughter, Bridie. I don't see any part of him in you. He has never seen you and he never will. He's not a part of you, and he hasn't had a single thing to do with you." Kate lays down next to her daughter, pulling Bridie to herself. "I never wanted to lie to you. I just... I just couldn't ever fathom telling you this."So when you started to ask about... about  _him,_ I had no idea what to say. Because you... you were the best thing given to me in the worst possible way."

"I'm sorry." Bridie sobs. "I'm sorry. I was so horrible-"

"I love you." Kate smooths down Bridie's hair. "I just wanted to protect you." She presses a kiss to the top of Bridie's head, and she thinks she'd be happy if she just never let her daughter go again. "I love you so much."


	15. Chapter 15

She doesn't sleep that night, not that she'd really expected herself to. After all, her brain is spinning with everything that has happened in the last few days, so that every time she's even still, it's just a cacophony of noise.

I'm the daughter of a monster.

Bridie's words echo in Kate's head, over and over again, until she wants to tear her hair out. She wants to dig her fingers into her brain, wants to gouge off her skin, something, anything that will just make it stop.

She runs.

She's always been fast, always light and speedy, and she relishes in the burning in her chest, at the way her lungs work, the way her toes push her off the ground with each step. She runs, because she knows the truth doesn't set anyone free. Knows that she's just transferred the greatest burden ever onto her daughter's shoulders. She runs, because there's more to the story.

She has no clear destination in mind, instead moving on instinct, taking corners at random until finally she skids to a halt in time to see a sign proclaiming HMAS CAIRNS.

She slows to a walk, not wanting her body to seize up, but at the same time finding herself struck by the letters. That she might have found her way here, in another life, has her completely transfixed, and for a moment she touches the 'C' of 'CAIRNS', closing her eyes as she recalls the shrill whistles of morning PT, and the smell of boot polish. She'd wanted that life for herself. She'd loved every minute of the academy, had relished in the discipline, the routine. She'd thrived in the environment. For the very first time, she'd been respected, appreciated for what she could do, who she was, rather than the family she'd come from.

And then she'd gotten pregnant.

No.

Then he'd gotten her pregnant.

She forces herself to keep running. She can't afford to get caught up in all these memories, because there's no way that she'd ever wish away her daughter, but she still can't deny the yearning and nostalgia for the life she'd once had. For one year, one measly year, she'd been at ADFA, and she'd felt as though she truly belonged, felt as though she had a purpose.

And then she'd had to leave.

And she is just as much a scared kid today as she was when she'd put in her papers.

"Well don't you just look like a ray of sunshine this morning?" ET grins down at her as she finishes the last of her coffee, perched stiffly on the edge of the bench top. She'd skidded into the station just before daybreak, taking her frustrations out on the punching bag in the gym before resolving to nearly drown herself in the showers, all the while downing coffee after coffee. "Seriously, what's your secret? You look so cheery it's as if you should have woodland creatures singing around you and butterflies-"

"Do you ever shut up?" Kate snaps, refilling her mug and taking another gulp. "Between you and 2Dads and all of your bullshit-"

"Whoa!" Charge wanders in, holding his hands up in surrender as though he'd just walked into the middle of a gunfight. "It's all happening in here this morning. Did they switch you to decaf again?"

Rolling her eyes, Kate fixes him with a glare so severe that Charge quickly leaves in the same direction as he'd come from, and Kate returns her attention back onto her mug. She's in no mood for small talk or pleasantries today. Right now, she needs action.

"Well, you do look tired." ET defends, plucking an apple from the bowl next to Kate and taking a large bite. "Big night at the pub? Drank more than you could swallow?"

"Those are some mighty strong words for the guy whose nickname stands for Extra-Tipsy." Kate points out. "And didn't your family ever teach you not to poke a sleeping dragon?"

"Okay, okay. I'll leave you alone." ET takes another bite, chewing thoughtfully. "But... you're okay?"

"Brilliant." Kate jumps down from the bench-top, rolling her eyes sarcastically. "Splendid." She hisses. "Just... fighting the urge to break into song." She starts in the direction of the shed, jabbing a thumb. "I'm gonna go do some cleaning."

The last thing she expects to find is him, leaning against the truck and looking utterly relaxed. His face breaks into a wide grin as he looks at her, and despite the fact that the rollers are wide open, the weak light of daybreak filtering in from the street beyond, and she can hear the voices of the guys in the other room, she feels hopelessly, undeniably trapped. Her eyes immediately dart around, searching for escape routes, and she bites down on her tongue to stop herself from yelling out.

"You hadn't called us." His voice is the same, cheerful, a slight frown in his eyes, as though there was no reason he could think of as to why she would be avoiding his calls. She remembers that. The same way he'd been in the car after, and the next few days, making her feel like she was crazy, imagining things. "Maddie was so excited to see you the other day, so I thought I'd pop on over and say hi. Make sure you got the messages."

She says nothing, stilling ten metres away from him. And for a moment her eyes close, and she remembers the day she'd returned to the academy after that Christmas, and how she'd unloaded bullet after bullet into silhouetted cardboard figures, imagining it was him. "I hope you're doing better, Kate."

"What are you doing here, Patrick?" She hates the wobble in her voice, hates the way her fingernails are digging into her flesh and her legs are turning to jelly. But most of all, she hates the nonchalance in his voice, as though he genuinely has no idea as to why she would be upset at all. "You need to leave."

He ignores her words, not giving a single sign that he'd heard her, still moving ever closer to her. "The last time we saw you I was so worried about the girls and Maddie. And I know you were too. I know Maddie especially means so much to you. You wouldn't want to see her hurt." He keeps his voice light, but she can hear the threat behind it. "After all, I know you and her had a special bond. Such a shame the way you took off without so much as an explanation-"

"Is that what you told her happened?" Kate challenges, drawing herself up.

"I just want to be sure you're getting the help you need. You were... well, you were always such a troubled child. After everything that happened with your mother and that boyfriend of hers-"

"I told you to get away from here!" She balls her hands into fists, and she longs to sink them into his flesh. "Whatever happens from here on out is my decision, not yours. And I won't be threatened by you anymore."

She wants to make him leave, wants him to feel some fraction of the pain and fear that she's felt for years and years. But he gives a soft, humourless chuckle and steps closer. "Threats? Katie, I'm not here to threaten you. I just wanted to see you. After all, I know everything... everything that happened to you when you were a child. I read your file, you know? Before we took you and Callista in. Kate, are you still having delusions? Because if you are, honey, you need to get help-" His hand reaches out and circles around her wrist. "After all, you've got a history of lying to the police. I just wouldn't want you to hurt anyone else by spinning any more of your fairy-tales."

"You raping me is a fairy-tale?" Kate hisses.

His smile turns to a snarl, and his grip on her wrist tightens. For a moment, she's back in yesteryear, and he's pinning her wrists above her in one hand, while the other- "That old story again? First Ed, now me." He tuts, shaking his head. "You'll realise that your stories benefit no one."

"Get the fuck away from me!"

"Hey, Kate!" 2Dads' voice rings out clearly, and Patrick lets go of her arm as though she'd suddenly burned him. In one fluid motion, he takes a step back, so smoothly she wouldn't have seen it if she hadn't been looking. 2Dads strides up towards them both, eyes darting between them. "You good?"

"She's fine. We're just catching up-" Patrick begins, turning his charm on 2Dads, and she hates how effective an act it is. The same one she'd fallen for all those years ago. "We go way back, don't we Kate-"

2Dads doesn't take his eyes off Kate, completely ignoring Patrick. "Buff wants to see you. Something about the harnesses?" She knows his words are nothing more than an excuse for her to leave if she wants to, but before she can open her mouth, Patrick claps a hand on Kate's shoulder.

"She'll be there in a minute."

2Dads doesn't budge. "Actually, Sir, I'm afraid you need to leave. No civilians in the truck shed."

Both men are smiling, but it's clear that the grins are anything but joyful. Patrick's tongue flicks out briefly to lick his lips, before he says delicately, "I'm catching up with my daughter." He throws an arm around Kate's shoulder, and she physically recoils. "Surely there's an exception for family?"

"Afraid not." 2Dads clicks his tongue and steps closer, so that he's barely a metre away from them.

For a moment, Kate is about to shout out a warning to 2Dads, because she doesn't know what Patrick is about to do, but he has that same dangerous look in his eyes. A second later though, he holds his hands up in defence. "Okay. No problem. I'll be seeing you, Katie. Think about what I said."

Kate doesn't turn to watch him leave, keeping her gaze firmly on the truck. And she remembers being in labour with Bridie and gritting her teeth, imagining horrific punishments being inflicted upon Patrick. She longs to run him over with the truck. A moment later, she feels rather than sees 2Dads move closer to her. "He's gone." He whispers softly. Kate says nothing, her gaze fixed firmly on her shoes. She can't believe what had just happened, that Patrick would dare to come here. After what seems like a lot of hesitation, 2Dads touches a hand gently to her shoulder. "You want me to call the cops?"

"No." She comes out of her reverie, shaking her head. "No. No cops." Of that, she's certain. One hand absentmindedly rubs the spot on her wrist where he'd grabbed her, jabbering feverishly. "I'm... I'm okay."

2Dads looks unconvinced, and for a moment Kate wishes that this was the Navy. Then at least, she could order 2Dads to leave her alone. He leans a little closer, muttering hesitantly. "Listen, I... I don't know what I'm supposed to do or say, but... I heard what you said. What he did." 2Dads hesitates. "Kate, you need to-"

"I don't need to do anything, okay?" Kate snaps, because they're the same things that Cal had told her, the same things Bridie had said. As if filing a report would do her any good. As if telling anyone had helped her last time. "Just... just forget it, okay?"

"But-" He's cut off though, as a loud alarm rings through the shed, and the sound might just have been sent down by the angels, so welcoming is the harsh sound to her.

"I don't know what you thought you heard, but just drop it, okay? Let's just get to work, okay?" She cuts him off as they move towards the truck, pulling their boots on. "Don't mention it again."

"It... must be a big one." Spider muses, leaning forwards slightly in his chair to get a better view through the window. "I mean, so many teams are en-route." Kate sees him square his jaw, and briefly recalls her own days after first starting. Of trying to look tough, while inside you're terrified.

"Not yet. And hopefully not at all." Dutchy chimes in. "Just do what you need to do, and don't waste time thinking about other stuff." He reaches over and claps the kid on the back, but Kate isn't entirely sure he's finding Dutchy's words at all encouraging.

"Look, we have a really volatile situation going." Buffer agrees, and they all fall silent. "We've had a petrol tanker lose control and crash into a service station. We've got fuel everywhere and a very real risk of fire at any moment, plus people trapped in a building with a risk of structural damage. At the moment, it seems like it's not a question of if the building comes down, but when. Team Delta are going to assist with the evacuations while Team Bravo are going to be working on securing the rig and stemming the flow of fuel. We do not want an fuel-fed fire. We need to work quickly, and we need to stick together!" The truck skids to a stop and they all start to move. "Ready?"

She's used to walking into husks of buildings, used to battling through smoke and heat and landscapes that look as though they could be from hell itself, just to rescue people. She's used to seeing twisted, horrific scenes, used to the smell of smoke clinging to her with each step. It's things like this that make her worry. Scenes that just look normal. She knows that danger hides in the unseen, but the apparent openness of the well-lit shopfront is setting her on edge.

"Those that can walk, make your way to the back of the building, and you'll be escorted out through the emergency exit!" Dutchy calls in his commanding tone, gesturing in the direction they'd come from. The front exit is blocked by the fallen tanker, broken glass coating the ground like glittering crystal.

For the most part, everyone seems to be okay. The early hour had meant that the shopfront is mostly empty, save for a handful of early commuters, perhaps stopping in for some petrol and a morning coffee. Kate's eyes rake over the scene, taking in the mess of chip packets and soft drink that are all over the floor after one of the shelves have tipped. Rounding the corner, she comes across a woman crouching next to a man. "Ma'am, are you hurt?"

"I'm fine. But he's stuck." She gestures towards his feet, and Kate sees that the shelf has fallen on them. "I thought I could lift it, but-"

"Okay, no worries." Kate's eyes scan him briefly. Maybe broken ankles, cuts, bruising. "We'll have him out at any moment. Do you know his name?"

"I don't know him." The woman shakes her head. "He kept muttering Alex, but I don't know if that's his name."

"Okay." Kate nods. "You head towards the exit." Kate gestures in the direction, before turning her attention to the shelf. It's heavier than she'd expected, maybe weighted at the base to reduce the risk of it falling. "Shit. 2Dads?"

A sudden wave of heat sends them both off-guard, and a moment later Kate hears the clattering of several pieces of ceiling falling to the ground. Almost immediately, Buffer's voice sounds in her ear. "We have active fire, and I don't know how much longer this building will hold. It's crumbling. Get out."

And then Marshall's voice. "Evacuate! Team Delta, get out!"

Kate glances around. Most of the team are already out, assisting the walking wounded. Only 2Dads remains, seeing one final woman through the door. "2Dads!" Kate calls again. "Now!" 2Dads rushes over and, with their combined strength, they lift the shelf up. There's definite crashes and bangs now, not to mention the frequent calls through the radio in her ear.

We're losing control of this blaze

Worried the tanker is about to go

How's that perimeter?!

Are they out of the shop yet?!

"We need to get out of here." Kate says, running a cursory glance over the man's leg. There's blood, probably from the metal shelf, and one of his ankles is twisted, maybe broken. "2Dads, you get him out! I'll do a final sweep and-"

"Alex." The man mutters, eyes still closed.

"Who's Alex?" Kate presses, eyes darting over the rest of the mess, making sure there's no one else. "Is that you?"

He shakes his head, almost imperceptively. "Baby." It's only then that she catches sight of the dummy, lying innocently next to him.

As if on cue, there's a soft mewling cry, and Kate curses. A loud crashing to her right, and Kate just manages to move as more of the roof falls. "Shit! Get him out, I'll-"

"There!" 2Dads lunges forwards, leaving Kate to support the man, and just manages to tug the baby capsule from its spot, half-hidden amongst twisties and cheezels. The baby in it is dusty and screaming, but Kate takes it as a good sign. He's breathing. "Kate, let's get out of-"

Kate sees the scaffolding fracture, and acts instinctively. Pushing the man off her, through the door, Kate grabs 2Dads arm and shoves him forwards with all her might. She has a brief flash of the baby capsule, still dangling off his arm, before the world around her crumbles, and she knows no more.


	16. Chapter 16

"I'm alright." Kate makes to swat away the hands all over her, but regrets it a moment later as pain shoots up her wrist. She tries to hide her wince in amongst a severe stare, but knows she hasn't exactly been successful as Nikki cocks an eyebrow.

" _We'll_ be the judge of that." Nikki clucks, shining her torch in Kate's eyes, before turning back to face Chris. "Pupils are a little sluggish. Possible concussion." She slaps a hand on Kate's back. "Looks like you're having a CT scan!"

"I don't need a CT scan!" Kate protests, dragging her good hand over her face. "I just want to go home and sleep." Over Nikki's shoulder stand most of the crew. "Isn't there a fire to fight or something?" She mumbles lamely.

"Are you always this terrible a patient?" Chris presses. "You're worse than my daughter when I have to put a bandaid on her." This time, it's Kate's turn to raise an eyebrow. "Look, you're going to the hospital anyway. You need your wrist x-rayed and probably set in plaster."

"And Charge has got a line on the fire, as have the guys from the South Station  _and_ Smithfield, so don't worry about that." Dutchy chimes in.

"You guys don't need to baby me."

"You narrowly escaped being crushed in a collapsing building. I'd say we're allowed to be a little concerned." Dutchy shrugs. "Saved 2Dads' bacon at any rate."

Nikki shuts her notebook with a snap and turns an appraising eye towards Kate. "So, you want the stretcher, or are you going to sit?"

"I'm not going in the ambulance!" Kate exclaims, sitting up straighter and wincing again as the pounding in her head increases. "Look, all I need is a couple of panadol and I'll be fine."

Nikki throws her hands up in exasperation, turning to Marshall, who's standing, arms folded, behind them. "You're not driving yourself to hospital. So it's ambulance or you get someone to pick you up. And they take you straight there! Okay?"

* * *

"You don't actually need to take me to the hospital." Kate frowns as she sinks deeper into the passenger seat, her eyes closed to protect her pounding head from the harsh sun's rays streaming in through the windshield. Even so, she can feel Mike turning to look at her.

"We're going to the hospital, Kate." His tone is curt, not like the usual jovial tone he usually uses with her, and she's curious and concerned enough to peek through her lids at him. His hands are white-knuckled on the steering wheel, his jaw clenched. He looks furious.

Her head gives another severe throb and she squeezes her eyes shut once more. "I'm... I'm sorry I called you."

"Well, I'm not." Mike spits, still in that measured, abrupt voice. "Otherwise I'd probably never have heard from you again. You'd have changed your name and moved to Tibet or something."

She digs the fingernails of her good hand into her thigh. "I... I would have."

"Would you?" He presses. "Because I'm starting to feel like a bit of a stalker, Kate, pleading to your voicemail."

"Mike, that's... it's not that simple." She forces her eyes open and reaches forward to touch his wrist. He pulls away from her touch, jerking the steering wheel in an irritated fashion, so that the tyres squeal slightly as he rounds the corner. "Mike, I called you today. I... I  _wanted_ to call you..."

"That's bullshit, Kate. You would have tried everything you could to get out of calling anyone. And I  _don't_ know why you called me. I mean, you run bloody hot and cold. And just when I start to think you're opening up to me, you disappear again! So, no, I have no idea why you called me. Perhaps it was because you sensed my interest in you was fading compared to my irritation at how you're constantly pushing me away. Or is it just because your sister wasn't available?"

"Mike, that's not..."

"So, what  _was_ the thought process? You were into me, and then the moment you discovered that I  _actually_ liked you, you bailed. Our daughters become friends, and you don't want to speak to me, but then you flirt with me. You tell me about your bad days, cry all over me, try to kiss me, and then you won't speak to me again. And then you tell me  _that,_ and I tell you I want to be there for you, and you don't drop my calls until you're nearly killed in a fucking tanker explosion?!" He slams a fist into the steering wheel. "So tell me, Kate, because I don't get it?"

Her head is pounding, and she has no explanation, because he's right, there is no excuse, and it's all she can do to shake her head. "I..."

A light ahead turns red, and he slams his foot onto the brake so suddenly she's jolted forwards, the seatbelt catching her before she smacks face-first into the airbags. "You know what, Kate? You're going to push away everyone who loves you, then fine! But you're going to end up a sad, lonely old-"

But Kate doesn't hear the rest of his words. All she knows is that the world is suddenly red, and her head is splitting open, and she can barely breathe, let alone formulate a response. She tries to speak, tries to tell him that she's sorry, that he's right, but she just can't wrap her mouth around the words. And then... nothing.

Mike stops his rant as Kate suddenly slumps forwards, head lolling pathetically like a rag doll. "Shit." He leans over, hands grappling with her, trying to lift her up, to feel for a pulse. Anything. "Kate?" She recovers slightly, eyes rolling, mumbles something unintelligible, and falls again. "Shit." He curses again. "Okay, Kate, we're almost... hospital. Shit, just hang on, okay?"


	17. Chapter 17

Mike bursts into the emergency room, Kate limp as a ragdoll in his arms. "Help!" He's not aware of the panicked looks, barely conscious of the people half-rising to help him, or the fact that he's left his car unlocked, passenger door thrown ajar. All his thoughts are focused on the woman in his arms. "Someone! Help! Please!" He can't stop his voice from shaking, can't hold in the fear in his voice. "Please!"

He doesn't really want to let her go, but within a few moments there's faceless, nameless medical staff surrounding them, scooping her from his grip. And he knows they're better equipped to help her than he is. "What happened to her?" One woman demands.

"She... she just collapsed." He swallows hard, forcing himself to focus as hands peel Kate's eyelids back, and check for a pulse. "Uh..." He can't take his eyes off of her. "She was injured at work. A... a firefighter. She's... she's a firefighter. She got hit with some debris in a collapsing building. And her wrist-" Her damaged wrist seems to be the least of their problems now.

"What's her name?" She's pale. Too pale. He can't even tell if she's breathing.

"Kate. Kate... ah, I don't know if it's short for anything. Kate McGregor?" He makes to follow them as they make to move her, but one of them puts a hand up to stop him.

"Sir, you need to stay here. Let us do what we can for her." And with that, she's dragged away from him, while he stands in the doorway, watching the stretcher trolley wheeled away from him.

* * *

He thinks time might just cease to exist. He has only the vaguest memory of heading out and moving his car from its spot in front of the emergency doors, has no idea where he's put his parking ticket and can barely recall what he'd said to the woman who'd called to check Kate  _had_ gone to the doctors. All he knows is, as soon as he'd mentioned  _emergency,_ she'd hung up and gotten into contact with Cal, who in turn had called Mike.

And all the while, he's torn between worrying about Kate, and thinking about yesteryear. Because hospitals never seemed to hold good news. At least not for him, or the people he loved.

Bitterly, he pulls himself to his feet again, with half a mind to go and beg the nurse again for an update on Kate. Something, anything. Because, no, he knows he's not her family, but he cares about her, doesn't he? He... he might just love her.

 _Love_?

But no. No. Because she's stubborn and annoying and, anyway, she doesn't love him, couldn't love him. And it's a bloody cliche to decide that you love someone when their life is hanging in the balance and-

No.

 _No_ , her life isn't on the line. It can't be. He won't let it be. Not when the last thing he'd said to her was in anger.

There's a clattering of feet, and he jerks his head up, grateful for the distraction, just in time to see three people dashing towards him.

"Dad!"

"Mike!"

" _Mike!"_

He barely has time to take in the harrowed look in Cal's eyes as she tugs Bridie by the hand before there's a flash of brown and Rose runs ahead and throws herself into Mike's arms. For a moment, he just buries his face into her hair, before looking up into the wide eyes of Cal. For a moment, he's taken by the similarities between her, Kate and Bridie, something that he's never noted before, what with Bridie's wild curls and Cal's ever-changing hairstyles.

"Mike!" Cal demands, her voice severe, and he wonders how many times she'd called his name before he'd registered. "What happened? Where's Kate?"

"She..." He swallows hard, trying to clear his throat. "Th-they... they took her."

Cal takes a step forwards, and even though her eyes look wide and terrified, there's something so composed in the way that she demands information. "Took her  _where_?"

"I... I don't know." He admits, eyes turning to the doors that had swallowed her. "I... we're not..." They're not family. They're not related. They're not anything. He looks into Cal's eyes, so like Kate's, and opens his mouth with no idea what he's about to say. "Cal, I... I tried." He hates the neediness in his voice, hates the way he's so desperate for her to know that he isn't just here because he feels bad about the things he said, or out of some twisted sense of duty. But she turns her head away from him, apparently dismissing him as useless.

Heels clicking on the linoleum floor, she makes her way up to the reception counter and taps her nails impatiently on the desk. "My sister, Kate McGregor, was brought in here. I'm after an update."

Mike doesn't hear the words that the nurse is saying, or Cal's response. Instead, he finds his gaze drifting towards Bridie, who's staring at him with a hopeless look on her face as though begging him to fix this. Their eyes lock, and he can't stand the tears welling in those young eyes. "Bridie-" He reaches forwards, not exactly sure what he's supposed to say or do. But before he can act, Rose has wrapped her friend in a warm hug.

"Hey, Bee. She... she'll be okay." Rose looks up in time for Mike to catch the uncertainty on her face, begging her father to agree.

* * *

If her foot wasn't twitching, he might think that Cal was asleep. Her face is hidden in her hands as her elbows rest on her knees, her spine bent almost in a 'C', so that she's barely sitting on the hard plastic chairs. He can't look at the clock, can't bear to see how much time has passed, because surely someone should have said  _something_ by now. It's the not knowing that's the hardest. The silence. He remembers that all too well from years ago.

It's all too familiar, memories from yesteryear intermingling with the present, and for a moment, he's dwelling on the health of two women, not one. Shaking himself from his thoughts, he turns to Cal, keeping his voice low. "I... I can call my mother. She can take the girls. If... if you want." He throws half a glance towards the spot on the chairs where the two girls are curled up, heads resting on balled-up jackets. How he envies their ability to sleep through this.

Cal's body gives away no indication that she's heard his words, but a few moments later her voice comes through her fingers, slightly muffled. "Have you told her yet?"

"Told who what?" Mike frowns. Truth is, his head is foggy and confused, with no idea what he's supposed to be doing. He can't shake the feeling that he's intruding on something private, like he shouldn't really be here and that any moment, Cal will demand he leave.

"Kate." Cal answers simply, sitting up straighter so that, for the first time in hours, he can see her face. Her eyes are keen and inquisitive; only the slight hitch in her voice betraying her fear. "Have you told her how you feel about her yet?"

He doesn't bother to deny her observation. Instead he drags a hand through his stubble. "She... she doesn't feel the same way."

Cal gives a wry smile. "I know my sister." She inclines her head. "And she does. Feel the same, I mean."

Mike closes his eyes, hating himself for clutching at Cal's words like a talisman, for so badly wanting to believe in them. His voice is shaky as he forces himself to confess. "I... I was yelling at her."

"Yeah, I do that a lot too."

"No." Mike shakes his head, needing her to understand. "When it happened. I... I was yelling at her."

"And you think that this is all your fault?" Cal presses. "So your words have superhuman strength, and you caused her to pass out?" Mike says nothing, glaring at the woman, and after a moment Cal drags a hand through her hair. "Look, you don't need to stay. I've got this. Get Rose home. This isn't..."

"I... I don't want to leave her." Mike turns his head back towards the doors they'd dragged Kate through, and crumples. "God, I don't want her to die. I just..." He hesitates for a moment, then shakes his head. "I hate hospitals. And  _this_ one especially." He admits. "When Sarah got sick..." He trails off, and Cal says nothing, instead reaching out her hand to squeeze it reassuringly. "When Sarah got sick, it took so long... too long. There were... there were times when we were just... just praying for it all to be over, because she was in so much pain. And then other times when everything just seemed so unfair. Like time was running away from us, slipping away. And now, I'm here again, and I know it's not about me but-"

"Hey, you're allowed to have feelings, Mike." Cal cuts him off. "No one is going to begrudge you that."

"I need her to be okay." He whispers. He blinks, trying to clear the fog from his gaze, and realises that he doesn't quite know what he'll do if Kate dies. With Sarah, there'd been time. So much time that it had almost been cruel in a way, the slowest goodbye in history. Completely incomparable to this. "Can I ask you something?" Mike breaks the silence once more, turning to Cal. "Something that might... might be a totally insensitive question or... or be none of my business and... and if that's true, then just say, but... why didn't she report him?"

Cal looks up at him, but there's no anger or irritation in her eyes. Instead, she gives a sad smile. "I guess... in order to understand that, you need to know about Kate and I. I mean, I know you know the basics about our mother?"

"Kate said she was an alcoholic."

"Well, that's putting it mildly." Cal gives a wry smile. "She was... horrible. She was never equipped to be a mother, but she kept us. But all she cared about was herself. I mean, I... I think she loved us, in a way. But she wasn't the type to take responsibility for anything or anyone. Kate was basically my mother, from the very start. She looked out for me and cared for me. And I probably resented her a little for that. After all, I had Mum telling me I could have ice cream for dinner and Kate saying 'no, you need to eat the stir-fry I made for you' or... or whatever. But it was always her that looked out for me. Her that... that gave me bandaids and changed my nappies and... and worked so we had food and clean clothes and all of that sort of stuff. But most of all, she protected me. I mean, some guys Mum dated, it was... I mean, they were just in it because of her, because... because she was easy, or fun. And they never lasted long. But then there are other men out there. Men that date women like her to... to get to the kids."

Mike feels sick, and for a moment he has to fight to urge to get up and run, to attack every single person who had hurt them. Dizzying, sickening images rush into his mind, and he actually screws up his face, hoping to stop them.

"For the most part, I... I didn't know. Kate made sure none of them even looked sideways at me. She... she kept me safe. I didn't even know anything about it until... until I was... maybe seven? Kate was sixteen and I walked in and found..." Now it's Cal's turn to screw up her face. "I remember the look of terror in her eyes and... and afterwards, when he realised I'd seen, he... he just spat on Kate, still lying on the kitchen floor, and told her to sort it out. Kate... Kate took me and let me cry all over her and... and even now I feel so guilty. Because it should have been me helping her but instead it was the other way around. It was always the other way around but I just didn't know what was happening. But she just kept telling me to forget it, but I guess... he figured that now I knew, he didn't have to hide it as much. And he... he kept hurting her. I... I was young and confused and I... I went to school and told my teacher. Because I didn't really quite know what was happening, but I knew it was bad and I just wanted it to stop."

"You... you reported them?" Mike frowns, because it's not the end to the story he's expecting.

Cal nods sadly, scraping her hair off her face. "I remember when Kate came to pick me up from the school, like she always did, two policemen met us and took us both to the station. I was scared and Kate kept squeezing my hand. And then we got separated and they wanted to talk to us alone. They kept asking me what I'd seen, and whether anyone had hurt me, and... it seemed to go on for hours." Cal picks at her fingernails, scraping along them, so that fragments of chipped black nail polish falls to the ground. "I found out later Kate broke down. He was... was the third guy to take advantage of having a young girl in the house. The first time she... she was ten."

Ten. A child. Ten.

"When it was all over I remember just... just running into Kate's arms and crying. They'd said we'd go somewhere safe and I was just so grateful until... until they pulled us apart. We got... separated and then all of a sudden we were in foster care. And without Kate..." Cal gives a sad shake of the head. "We were apart for over a week. I was so scared I was wetting the bed each night and sick all day. And of course, that didn't help me settle in when you're the baby bed wetter. I'd cry to Kate on the phone every second night when I was allowed to call, and beg her to come and get me. I'd planned to run away and find her. Until... one day we got sent home. Just like that."

"You..." Mike frowns, not quite understanding. "To your Mum?"

Cal gives a small nod. "To them both. See, Kate went to the cops and told them that she'd made it all up."

"But..." Mike's jaw drops. "But why?"

Cal ducks her eyes, and there's such a look of shame on her face. "Because she knew I needed her. Because... because being together in a shithole was better than being apart. And because she's always looked out for me."

"But... I still don't get it. I mean, Kate was an adult with Patrick. She could have-"

"Patrick had Kate's file. The file that detailed all about how she went on the record to say she lied to the police about being sexually abused." Something seems to click in Mike's mind and Cal nods sadly. "He told her no one would believe the girl that's already cried wolf. And that if she told she'd never see me again. He got in her head. So it was easier for her to keep quiet and just... just get me instead."

"He... she could still have told. She-"

"Mike, you... you're a man, okay? And I know you care about her but... you're still a man. You don't  _get_ how it is to be a woman. To be scared of men everywhere, to deal with sexist comments and catcalls and... and not even feeling safe just walking the streets after dark. And add onto that a complete lack of anyone else caring for you and... me I get why she did it. I mean, I want nothing more than them all to pay for what they did but... she trusted Patrick. I think that's what hurt her the most. That she trusted him enough to tell him all of this and then he abused that trust in the worst way." She shakes her head at Mike. "I get that you're standing here not able to understand why she didn't. And I know you might be feeling as though she's taking the easy way out. But... it's not easy. If she reported him, it wouldn't just be what he did against her. It would be Kate's entire life. Every... every time she ditched school to look after me, every mistake Kate ever made, every relationship she's ever had. And especially that withdrawn report."

Mike turns to look at his clenched fists. "I want to hurt everyone that hurt her." He murmurs.

Cal meets his gaze and nods. "Yeah." She agrees. "Me too."

They both look up instinctively as a doctor approaches; they've been doing it all night, only to be faced over and over with them moving past. However, the doctor clears her throat and looks around. "I'm after Callista McGregor?"

"That's me!" Cal pushes herself to her feet so fast she stumbles. Mike reaches out instinctively to steady her, but she manages without his intervention, straightening up. "How's Kate?"

"We've managed to stabilise her for the time being. After her injury, she's been suffering from brain swelling, which we've been trying to reduce by a combination of fluids and medications, as well as putting her on a respirator and sedating her to try and let her body heal. For now, it's a bit of a waiting game. I'm afraid we won't know the extent of the damage done until her swelling goes down."

* * *

He finds himself leaning against a concrete garden bed outside the hospital, knuckles white as he grips the concrete beside him. All around him is a bustling hive of activity; people on their way to work or school, cars streaming past, or else strolling idly past. The area is filled with the scent of cigarette smoke too, as everyone blatantly ignores the signs plastered all around the entrance to the hospital, and he feels as though the toxic fumes are choking him from the inside. He wants to run and scream at all these people. Don't they realise how fleeting life is, how quickly it can be taken away?

He lets out a shaky breath and pushes off of the surface, not knowing where he's going but not content to sit by anymore. Fuck cancer. Fuck traumatic brain injuries. Fuck hospitals and grief and every single bad thing that is happening right now.

"Mike?" He looks up at the sound of his own name and, for a moment, is about to shout out to Kate. Then, his brain catches up with his eyes and he sees that the flash of blonde doesn't belong to Kate after all, and he clenches his fists tighter in his pockets.

"Maxine?" He pulls himself up straighter, aware of just how bad he must look. "What are you doing here?" After all, he's not entirely sure  _why_ Maxine would be wandering outside the hospital first thing in the morning.

"Rose called me. Said she was worried about you. I just got back from my shift and... here I am. Well, I mean I've run the maze of the entire hospital first. Found Rosie and she sent me this way." She gives a light shrug before taking a spot on a bench and patting the seat next to her. "You look like crap."

"Cheers, Max." He peers blearily at his phone and finds it is dead.

"It's just after 0830 hours." Maxine murmurs, and for a moment Mike converts the time in his head. As if knowing what he's thinking, Maxine rolls her eyes. "8am, for you." She digs in her bag and fishes out a small device and a cord. "And here's a portable charger. Charge your phone." She gives a light shiver as she peers up at the building. "So... need to talk? I mean, I get a call from Rose completely out of the blue, telling me you apparently are into a woman - thanks for telling your best mate, by the way. And she's got a traumatic brain injury in the same hospital Sarah died in. So... fair bit to unpack in all of that?"

"Harsh." Mike muses, but he has come to appreciate Maxine's brutally honest nature. After all, she knows just as well as he does about how it feels to lose a partner. They'd met at this very hospital pacing oncology, and Maxine had lost her husband Jeff barely a week before Sarah had died.

She gives a shrug and rummages in her bag once more before extracting a paper bag, dropping it in his lap. "Hey, I never claimed to be the most sensitive of friends. I  _am_ however, the one that gets what you're going through. There's a piece of banana bread in there. Eat. Have a bit of a break and then we'll go back in."

He catches her staring up at the building once more. "Are you... right to be here?"

"Well, I mean I guess this place doesn't really have happy memories for either of us, but... I'm more worried about you right now." She picks at a rip in her jeans.

For the longest time, they just sit there, watching the sea of people stream by. And then, slowly, Mike pulls himself back to his feet. "I think I love her, Max."

Maxine nods soberly, scraping her hair from her face. "So, why are you hiding out here instead of waiting by her bedside for a romantic confession the moment she wakes?" She challenges. Mike opens and closes his mouth for a moment, then looks away bitterly.

"What would your squad think if they knew how much of a fan of rom-coms you really are?"

"Hey, is this pick-on-Max day? I just... happen to be a kick-arse cop by day, and a rom-com-loving-Mum by night. But don't change the subject!"

"I... she's... she's a firie. I... I mean, even just this-"

"I get it, Mike."

"No, you don't!" Mike shakes his head.

"You're scared to get attached, because you've got it in your head that her career means she's in danger all the time, and you're not sure how you or Rose could cope with that." Mike looks up, surprised she's managed to hit the nail on the head so succinctly. "Look, I... I can't promise you she's going to be okay, Mike. But... Jeff and I were both cops. And I guess it was always in the back of our minds that it could be... I don't know... a bullet or a bomb or  _something._ And then Jeff got diagnosed. And it doesn't seem right. I mean, Sarah was a fucking librarian! Death... it doesn't discriminate, okay? I guess... you've got to decide whether you love her more than you fear loving her."

Mike shakes his head sadly.

"Hey," Maxine nudges him. "Life is short, Mike." She stands up and pulls him to his feet. "And Sarah would want you to be happy." They both stare up at the building. "So, are you ready to go back in?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:So, for this story, I'm going with the original Season 4 bio of Maxine, where she had lost her husband Jeff and was a widow, rather than the travesty of a backstory they gave her in season 5. It just turned her into the bad guy for no reason, and I will protect Maxine to the end. I know this chapter kind of ends really clunky but I'm not too sure about it.


	18. Chapter 18

He lives in a haze for the next few weeks. Of course, he tries. For the most part, he puts on a brave face for Rose, his little Rosie, trying to act at least somewhat like a coherent, responsible parent. And for the most part, he's okay at it. He's long ago perfected the art of masking fear and grief around Rose, and he's not surprised to see it come back in full force.

Of course, Maxine sees right through it, but she's tactful enough not to say anything to challenge him, instead finding excuses to drop by with meals or else take Rose out for girls' nights or shopping trips that leave him free to sit beside Kate's still figure in the hospital and will her to wake.

He meets the rest of the fire crew properly over the next fortnight or so, from the protective Dutchy and Buff, who stand like bodyguards either side of the door, arms folded, and say very little; to the childish and energetic 2Dads' and Spider (seriously, what was up with these names?). Then there was the talkative Nikki, the solemn Chris, the hesitant ET, even the commanding Chief Marshall, and the awkward Robert, who spends his time spewing out statistics and facts about comas and traumatic brain injury until Cal so very bluntly begs him to stop.

But he's glad they're all here for her, that she has that support network, and he can't stop assuring himself that she must know they're there for her.

She has brief periods of dazed consciousness, but it's barely enough time for someone to call for the nurse before she's slipped back into unconsciousness, occasionally mumbling something unintelligable or else twitching her hands awkwardly. He likes it better when it's just her and him though, and he's free to beg her to wake up, and tell her over and over again how sorry he is.

* * *

"Hey." Maxine pushes open the door for him to enter, and he obliges, moving towards the familiar living room. "Rosie's just upstairs with Ryan. Playing some playstation game together." She casts an appraising eye over him. "I'll heat you up some pasta if you want?"

"No, I... I'm not really that hungry." He hesitates for a moment, then frowns. "Can I ask you... like a hypothetical legal question?"

"Uh... sure." Maxine nods, taking a seat on the lounge and gesturing for him to do the same. "If I can."

"I... I was wondering about... about if there's a... like a statute of limitations on... things."

"Things?" Maxine frowns. "Uh, you'll have to be a bit more specific on 'things', Mike. What happened?" She catches his gaze. " _Hypothetically?"_ She adds.

"Uh... hypothetically, if there was... like a crime was committed. Years ago. And she- they- wanted to report it now. Could they?"

Maxine looks as though she sees right through his 'hypothetical' situation, but doesn't press any further. "Like... an assault?"

"A... a rape?" He hates the question, hates the  _word_ even. And suddenly, he wants to tell Maxine everything, wants nothing more than to see that bastard behind bars, but he knows he can't.

"Well..." Maxine hesitates for a moment, as if she's pondering what to say. "Well, from what I know, up until 2016, child victims had three years from the time they turned eighteen to begin civil action. But now, that civil statutory time limit has been removed."

"But... could he still be arrested? Ah... hypothetically?"

Maxine adopts a pained look on her face. "I... in theory, yes. But... it's hard, Mike. The system is gruelling. Not only does your... hypothetical friend... have to be willing to make a statement, lay charges, but that's just the beginning. Time... it... it fades memories, it destroys evidence. I'm not saying it can't be done, and I'm  _definitely_ not saying that it  _shouldn't_ be done, but... when there's no evidence, or witnesses, it's... it's extremely hard to secure a conviction." She fiddles with a lounge cushion. "Look, it's... the prosecution-legal side of things isn't really my area of expertise. I mean, I walk around Cairns mostly... breaking up bar fights and making sure tourists don't get eaten by crocs." She looks as though she's struggling with something for a moment, before shaking her head. "When Kate wakes, I can always take a statement. If it's... something she wants to pursue."

Mike doesn't bother to deny the identity of his hypothetical friend - Maxine has never been dim.

"Mike, there's a... a lot of trauma involved. And... and that has lots of long-term effects on people. And the decision to report or not to... regardless of how it seems to us, it's an entirely different struggle in any victim's mind-"

"She's not a victim." Mike interjects, his eyes flashing.

Maxine bows her head obediently. "No. No, that was a poor choice of words." She agrees. "But... she has still suffered. And..."

"I'm not telling anyone they have to. I just..." He drags a hand through his hair. "I guess I just needed to know for myself if she could." He pushes himself up off the lounge. "Look, I... thanks for looking after Rosie. Really, Max, you've been amazing. I-"

"Mike, she... she's welcome to stay if you want to-"

"Max, I just need my daughter."

"Okay." She nods, holding her hands up. Again, he shakes his head.

"Look, I'm sorry. It's-"

"I know." Maxine pats him gently on the forearm, before pulling away. "She's upstairs."

* * *

"Did you see Kate today?" Rose asks, running her finger along the zipper of the backpack sitting neatly in her lap.

Mike glances at her for a moment in the rear-view mirror, softening at the genuine concern over his daughter's face. "Yeah. For a little bit." He agrees. "Did... how was Bridie today?"

Rose gives a half-shrug, looking down once more. "She was okay, I guess. Just quiet." Rose falls into silence once more, fidgeting with her zipper. It isn't until they're almost home that Rose speaks again. "How do you know when you're in love?"

"I..." Mike hesitates for a moment, the question completely taking him by surprise. "I... I don't know." He chances a glance over his shoulder at her, rather than the slightly difficult-to-see rear-view image of her, but she doesn't particularly look upset. Just curious. Turning his attention back to the road, he edges the car onto the side of the road and parks, so that he can give Rose his full attention. "Where's this coming from?"

"Well... when did you know you loved Mum?" Rose tries again. And of course, it's natural that she should want to talk about these sorts of things, natural that she has questions, but he can't deny the twinge of sadness and loss he always feels whenever Sarah is mentioned.

"Well... I..." He thinks back. "I knew I was going to marry her the moment I spoke to her."

"You did?"

Mike nods seriously, thinking back. "Yeah. We were in Year 12 at school, and we were both working on our final projects. I was making an end table for my final woodwork project, and she came in to ask about rigging up her own custom-sized canvases. And I just remember watching her sing under her breath as she wrote up all the measurements she needed and I just... I knew. Asked her out to dinner that very night." Rose smiles, and Mike echoes her expression, part-happiness, part-grief. "We got married a year after high school. No point waiting. But... well..."

"She got sick." Rose finishes the story for him.

"Yeah." He agrees. And he knows that, while Rose knows how her mother died, he's never really found the strength to tell her the full story. "We wanted to have kids, straight away. Sarah was working in a garden nursery - she was always so passionate about the environment. Had such a green thumb, your mum. But it was only a year after we got married that they found the cancer. She had surgery, and chemo and radiation and... and it was touch and go for a while. But it looked like she beat it. Only, after that, having a baby was more difficult. She struggled to... uh... to stay pregnant. And it made us both sad but Sarah used to always say that... that things happen for a reason. And I guess they did, because ten years after I first met her, we had a beautiful baby girl." He leans into the backseat as best he can and brushes a thumb against her cheek. "You were the best thing, Rosie. We both loved you so much."

"But then Mum got sick again." Rose murmurs sadly.

"Yeah." Mike agrees. "She... she fought so hard to be with you. To stay and be the mother that you..." He trails off, his voice cracking, and for a moment he has to turn around, has to steady himself, before he can turn around and finish his sentence. "But... by the time they caught it, the cancer had already spread into her blood. And... after that, it was... was all they could do to make her comfortable and make sure it was... peaceful."

"And was it?" Rose presses, and for a moment Mike closes his eyes, remembering nights of Sarah crying out in pain, of her writhing, of her vomiting bile and shoulder-blades that stand out like butterfly wings. The end, at least, had been mostly painless for her, but the middle... that had been nothing but pain. But he can't tell Rosie that.

"Yeah, Rosie." He assures her. "It was."

"So... do you love Kate?" Rose asks, wiping at a tear impatiently on her cheek. "Because... I guess people can love more than once. But... I guess you're also scared."

"I... I don't really know how I feel about Kate." Mike murmurs.

"But... I guess there are different kinds of love, right? I mean, Grandma said she didn't like Grandpa when they first met, and... and Maxine said she worked with Jeff for ages before they got together. And I know that people get divorced. So... love is different for everyone, right?"

"Yeah, I guess." Mike agrees, somewhat dazed.

"Because, I think Kate's nice. And if you did love her, that would be okay, you know? And I guess sometimes adults don't even  _know_ they're in love-"

"Okay! So... I might love her?" Mike declares. "I just kind of imagined if I was ever to say those words it'd be to her first and not to my suddenly love-obsessed daughter?"

Rose gives an unabashed smile. "I knew it." She grins.

* * *

They arrive ten minutes later at the hospital corridor, Rose and Bridie hugging each other as though it's been years since they had last seen each other, rather than simply a few hours. But it's Cal leaning against the wall that panics him. "Kate?" He asks frantically, dashing up to her and pulling her gently, so that they're facing away from the girls.

"They're just doing some tests." Cal assures him. "She's... she's doing better, actually. She's been talking, a bit."

"Well, that's good." Talking was good, right? Talking meant thinking which meant-

"Yeah." Cal nods distractedly, then seems to come to herself. "Sorry. Yeah, it's great news. It's just..." And without warning, she crumples, sinking to her knees and sobbing. Mike crouches quickly next to her, seizing her arm so she doesn't bang her head on the ground. "I could - have - lost her." Cal sobs. "I - I can't - lose - her!"

"I know." Mike murmurs, rubbing circles on her back. "I can't lose her either."


	19. Chapter 19

"Mike?" He can't express in words how beautiful the sound of her voice is, as he steps inside the hospital room and spots green eyes staring at him. It's almost surreal, as though he's going to wake up any second and find it's a dream, taunting him. But the seconds pass, and he's never been so aware of his senses, of the distant rythmic ticking and beeping, of the ground beneath his feet, of the scent of  _cleanliness_ in the air. Every sense is working in overtime, trying desperately to assure him that he is  _here,_ that this is real.

A distant movement in his peripheral vision snaps apart the moment, and he turns in time to see Cal, scraping faded pink hair from her face and edging from the seat. "I'll leave you two alone for a moment." She smiles, leaving the room before he can formulate a response.

For the longest time, Mike finds himself taking in Kate, from the tips of her now-messy blonde hair, to her bare toes peeking out from the end of the blanket. The bruises around her face are yellowing, her wrist now snugly plastered at her side. And at her hip sits a small teddy bear, dressed in a fireman hat and clutching a small cushion reading  _Get Well Soon, Hot Stuff!_  Almost unconsciously, Mike moves forwards and tugs the blanket over her exposed feet, before turning to look at her once more.

He doesn't know how much time he spends just taking in the sight of her, alert and breathing and smiling, before she breaks the silence. "Are they for me?" Her voice sounds tired, but it's still blissfully  _hers,_ as she nods to the bouquet of white lilies in his hands.

He follows her gaze. "These?" He frowns, lifting them up as he moves towards her, pulling a face. "Oh. Awkward. Well, no actually. It's just you've got a cute orderly who's been changing your IV and I'm going to ask her out."

Kate lets out a tired laugh, and it might just be music. "Good." She groans, brushing some hair from her face. "'Cause there's serious vibes between me and one of my doctors. Didn't want to have to turn you down."

He grins, and then drops into the seat Cal had just left, resting the flowers into an empty vase on the table. "You don't like to lose an argument, do you, McGregor?" He lets out a soft tutting noise. "I don't know. You firies. If you can't win, just slip into a coma."

"Well, it was the only way to make you shut up." She points out, mutely holding out a cup of yoghurt for Mike to open. He obliges and places it on the tray in front of her, unwrapping the plastic spoon before she even has to ask. "Cheers." She takes a spoonful of the yoghurt and pulls a face, before dropping the spoon back into the container. "So, Cal said you've been here a lot?"

"I told you." Mike grins. "Hot nurses."

"Well, you're not wrong." Kate agrees. "She also said you've been looking after Bridie."

"Urgh." Mike pulls a disgusted face. "Your sister is painting me out to be a  _gentleman._ " He spits the last word like it's a filthy curse. "I'm telling you, I only took her for the free labour. When I'm making my canoes, those kids can crawl into the small spaces that I can't."

Kate nods soberly. "She also said you got my name tattooed on your forearm."

Mike adopts an embarrassed look and mutters, "Well, that one is definitely true. A fleeting madness. It's your name, and then a picture of your face on a naked mermaid's body." He eyes her hand. "I'll draw it on your cast if you want." They both fall into silence once more. Almost unconsciously, he reaches forwards and takes her good hand in his, and all of a sudden he can't bring himself to look at her. "I missed you, Kate." All the fears he's been holding over her whole bout of unconsciousness is suddenly overwhelming, and he knows he'll completely break down if he looks at her. "I... I was so worried."

"I thought... I wouldn't... wouldn't see Bridie again. Or... or Cal. Or  _you._ I thought I was..."

His only response is a soft sob, and it seems to break the damn for both of them. For the longest time yet, they simply stare at their entwined hands, and let themselves cry. He knows he should be counting his blessings now, dancing on the rooftops of buildings or buying a lottery ticket. But he's completely overwhelmed by just how close a call this was. And he knows that a life with her would mean even more risks, more situations where she puts her life on the line every single day. That he can't simply say a thanks that it just wasn't today and move on.

"It's okay." Her words are barely more than a breeze. "I'm okay." He could never ask her to give up her job.  _Would_ never ask her. But he also knows this isn't something either of them can just brush under the carpet.

Finally, he hiccups himself into some semblance of recovery and sits up straighter, pulling his hands away from hers so that he can wipe the tears from his face. Looking into each others' blotchy faces, they both say in unison, "You look terrible." She gives a hiccuping laugh, and he fingers the yellowing bruise on her face.

"You look beautiful." He murmurs.

* * *

The school holidays arrive, with Bridie and Rose spending most of their time together. Between Mike and Cal, the two of them manage to work out a system so that someone is generally always with Kate while another is with the girls. It's not always ideal - Mike realises that the girls are starting to grow restless spending their time drawing in the hospital room, or else roaming the building, but for the most part, they get by, though not without the help of Maxine and his grandparents, who are always willing to take the girls out for trips to the lagoon, or the aquarium, or the movies.

Mike and Kate don't discuss their... is it a relationship? Certainly something more than a friendship, in any case. But no. The time he does spend with her is usually more of an exchange of quips rather than any serious talk, and as he wanders into her room one afternoon after spending the morning bowling with the girls (who had, of course, beaten him spectacularly), he can't help but laugh at her irritated gaze as she flicks idly through the channels on the ancient TV mounted on the wall.

"Alright for some." He quips, flopping into the chair beside her and dropping a Mars Bar beside her. "I'm out looking after your kid and you're in here catching up on  _Days of Our Lives_ and  _Judge Judy!_ "

"Pfft. No." Kate points towards the screen. "They show  _Dawson's Creek_ reruns on  _Go!"_  She eyes the chocolate on her bedside table. "Is that for me or one of your nurses?"

He tugs it back and begins to unwrap it. "Oh, I see the confusion. Oops. No, it's for me. I'm hungry. Just thought I'd eat it in front of you." He grins and passes it to her. "So, find any decent candidates to give you a sponge bath? Or are they all too scared to touch your sizzling red skin and talons?" He gives a mock sniff. "Evidently the latter, hey?"

"It's a shame the kids didn't drop a bowling ball on your head." She chuckles, picking up the iPad Cal had left on the dressing table and flicking through idly.

"Well, you'd know all about dropping things on your head, wouldn't you?" He smiles sweetly up at her, before gesturing at the iPad. "So... taking some selfies? Trawling through Tinder? Ha!" He nudges her lightly with his elbow. "Get it? 'Cause you're a firie?  _Tinder?_ "

"Keep talking about Tinder and that's what I'll turn your canoes into." She mutters, though she smiles softly at him. "So, Maxine? She your girlfriend?"

"Of course. But, she's very open minded, so..." He gestures between himself and Kate, raising his eyebrows suggestively, before turning back to seriousness. "Nah, just mates. She... uh..." He clears his throat, before forcing himself to keep talking. "She seems to think I might have feelings for you, as it turns out."

"And... do you agree?" Kate frowns.

"Well..." He tips his head. "Yeah. I do." He gives a mock sigh. "Maybe I've got brain damage too. But maybe, when you're out of here, we could try and go on a proper date. You know..." He waves a hand over her, taking in her still-recovering head and her plaster-clad wrist. "To... like a jar-opening factory, or a demolition site? I mean, I'd buy you a hardhat, obviously."

"Hmm..." Kate hums slightly. "Sounds terrible." A smile splits her face. "But yes."

"What the hell?!" A voice comes from the doorway, and both Kate and Mike jump as they catch sight of Cal, holding two coffees in a tray and staring in bewilderment between the both of them. "That was the weirdest fucking thing I've ever seen. Like, are you together now? Or... or are you insulting each other? Should I be kicking him out or hugging him? I don't know!" She turns and walks out of the room, still muttering, with Kate holding her good hand out after her.

"My coffee?" She moans, like a child whose lollipop had just been stolen.

"Ah, it's all good." Mike grins, patting her comforting on her good hand. "You've got me!"

She turns her face to him, and he can't resist tucking a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. "Well, if I've got you... then can you do me a favour?"

"Sure." Mike nods, smothering all the jokes that pop into his head, sensing that now is the time for seriousness. "What do you need me to do?"

* * *

"I don't know why I need a bloody wheelchair to get to the car." Kate groans for the millionth time that morning, looking at the chair in question as though it's a public toilet seat or something equally as foul. She's had her possessions packed into the bag Mike had brought her since that morning; he couldn't resist teasing her just a little, so the backpack in question just  _happened_ to be bright pink, with  _Dora the Explorer_ on the front. When she'd seen it, she'd simply rolled her eyes and sweetly thanked him for letting her borrow his  _favouritest backpack!_ "I can walk perfectly fine!"

"Hospital policy, I'm afraid, love." The nurse pats her comfortingly on her shoulder, to which Kate simply rolls her eyes at when the woman isn't looking.

"Come on." Mike pats the seat eagerly, as though beckoning her to a throne. "I've got the hang of pushing wheelchairs down stairs! It'll be just like a rollercoaster!"

Glowering at him, she takes the seat obediently, but can't stifle her laugh at the shocked look the nurse gives Mike. "He's kidding." Kate assures her. The nurse doesn't look completely convinced, but nods all the same and lets them leave.

"Well, uh... good luck, hon." She stammers lamely.

As they make their way down the corridor, Mike leans down to whisper in her ear. "Damn. She was the hot one."

Turning for one last glance at the easily-70-year-old nurse, Kate waves merrily. "Still reckon you're in with a shot." She grins, her smile widening as Mike serenely passes the elevator, waving merrily, and moves on towards the stairwell. Of course, Mike has to let go of the wheelchair for a second and open the stairwell, before speeding off as the door gives a tell-tale creak. "She's gonna call security on you!" Kate hisses, as he breaks into a jog, pushing her past room after room and reaching a second set of lifts, well out of sight of the reception area.

"Eh." Mike shrugs. "Just having some fun. Besides, you'd bail me out." He stares at the empty corridor. "Reckon we could do a wheelchair burnout? Find another one and do some jousting?"

"As lovely as it sounds, I just want to blow this place." Kate groans.

"Ah." Mike leans over to stab at the  _down_ button on the second set of lifts. "Dynamite. I like your style. But we'd better make sure your sister has the getaway car ready first."

They wait for the lift in silence, and it isn't until he's pushed her in and the doors have closed behind them that she speaks again. "The... the phone number I wanted you to get from my locker. It was... it was Maddie's."

"I know." Mike nods seriously.

"How?" Kate frowns, wondering whether  _he'd_ also called the number.

"Well," Mike adopts a serious, pondering expression. "It had her name underneath it, so I just took a wild guess." He winks at her, before murmuring, "And you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to."

"Oh, I think we're way past that, aren't we?" Kate lets out a shaky breath, but she's determined not to cry. After all, she's already wasted enough tears on that situation. "I... I called her, that night you gave me the number. I told her everything. And... she didn't say much, and then she hung up."

"And... and how do you feel now?"

Kate nods slowly. She hasn't really allowed herself much time to analyse her feelings properly, but she tries her best. "Well, I... I told her. And... and if she wants to see me, she can. And if not..." Kate trails off. "I just... it was time that she knew."

They lapse into silence for several more moments, both watching the digital numbers count down to the basement carpark. "Kate?" Mike begins tentatively after a moment, breaking the silence.

"Yeah?" Kate frowns.

He leans down, so that he's at her level, and lowers his voice, and she wonders for a moment whether he's going to kiss her. When he does speak, his voice is the most serious she's ever heard it. "I realise now we left your bag upstairs. And I think the nurse will kill me if I head up there without you."

* * *

"So... what exactly took you so long?" Cal eyes them suspiciously as Kate makes her way towards the car, having happily abandoned the wheelchair the first chance she could and now pulls the door open clumsily with her good wrist.

"Nurses had to check the stairs first." Mike deadpans, stowing the  _Dora_ bag safely in the boot before taking his spot in the back seat next to Rose.

"What?" Cal frowns, but Bridie, on Rose's other side, simply rolls her eyes at what is apparently a sense of humour she's come to recognise. Cal turns to each member of the car in turn, before throwing her hands up in the air. "I don't get half of what happens between you two!"

* * *

The car ride from the hospital isn't that long, although it certainly seems lengthened by Mike starting a singalong of  _Four-hundred and ninety-seven bottles of beer on the wall._ Why he'd started with that number, or even begun singing that song, Kate isn't entirely sure, unless it is specifically to annoy, which, in hindsight, she supposes it is.

She counters, reciting multiples of nine, louder and louder, until cheering in triumph as Mike looses his count. He just flashes her a winning smile and starts again.

It isn't until Kate and Cal fall into sudden silence, that Mike realises something is wrong. Cal has the car stopped, waiting to turn right into a driveway, but although the traffic is clear, Cal keeps the car still. Following their gaze, he spots the figure waiting outside the door to the house.

"Maddie?" Kate whispers softly, and Cal reaches across to grip Kate's hand.

He's not exactly sure what he'd expected the famous Maddie to look like. He supposes he's demonized her in his head, because honestly, how can someone not know they're married to a monster, and despite realism telling him that she probably isn't walking around with a pitchfork and horns, the woman standing at the door is not what he'd expected at all.

"Cal, we need to move." Kate murmurs. "Cal?" A horn beeps behind them, and they all seem to snap back to earth. Cal raises a hand in apology, before edging the car into the drive, eyes still wide. She doesn't even turn off the ignition, instead slipping from her seat and turning back.

"Stay here." Cal orders. "I'll... I'll see."

Kate makes to ignore her anyway, tugging her own seatbelt off, but Mike calls out. "No. Kate, I'll go. You... you stay with the girls." She turns back to face him, and for a moment their eyes meet. "I'll keep her safe." Mike promises, before he too heads out of the car and follows Cal.

By the time he's reached the front door, the woman is half-running towards Cal. "Callista? Oh! Callista!" Maddie lunges forwards, but freezes suddenly as Cal takes a step backwards instead.

"What do you want?" Cal demands, raising a hand, and there's something uncharacteristically stern in Cal's voice. Her pink hair seems to crackle with electricity, her gaze stern, and Mike realises he's always sort of thought of Cal as Kate's baby sister, when in reality, she is so much more than that. Maddie turns her gaze towards the car, and Mike can see that she's about to run to it instead. In one swift movement, Cal blocks her. "Maddie, you're not hurting her. Okay?"

"Hurt her?" Maddie turns her gaze back to Cal, and the woman seems to crumple before his very eyes, shrinking into her cardigans. "I... I'd never hurt you. Either of you. Please, I didn't know, okay? I..." She covers her mouth with a shaking hand. "Please, Callie. I'm... I'm so sorry. I didn't know. I... I need to tell her. I... I didn't know."

Mike turns his gaze to Kate, and gives a single nod. A moment later, she steps out of the car, and although her gate is slow at first, she soon breaks into a run, and she and Cal fall straight into Maddie's arms.


	20. Chapter 20

It's an afternoon of tears, and apologies and explanations. Mike makes to leave only once, but Kate mutely takes hold of his hand and pulls him back to the lounge, and all thoughts of leaving vanish.

Mostly, though, Kate doesn't cry. And it's almost as if she's cried too many tears over this, to shed any more. He can't help but admire her strength and kindness, because even in the most brutal of circumstances, all Kate seems to want to do is comfort Maddie.

"I didn't... didn't know what to do." Maddie says, over and over again. "I didn't know what he did. I swear. I..." She holds her hands over her face, as though this simple act of hiding can protect her from the horror of what has happened. Eventually, though, she looks up fearfully in Kate's direction. "I found... after you left. I haven't seen him. He... he's away and... and the girls are at friends' houses. I... I just don't know what to do."

Of course, it's so unfair that Kate has to deal with Maddie's anguish and confusion on top of everything else, another added burden, except he knows that Kate doesn't see it this way.

"I don't know what I'm going to do either." Kate admits. "I... I haven't made..."

Mike thinks about Maxine's words, and thinks about Kate's whole life being judged and questioned and needled in a court room. He'd spent time searching the internet too, from the  ** _#meetoo_**  movement, to 'slut shaming' and secondary victimisation. Just reading these stories is enough for him to want to lock Rose away from the world, safe from harm. He can't imagine having to make that choice of reporting, when it could affect a woman's whole life.

* * *

"I'm going over to help Maddie move her stuff out and driving her to a motel." Kate informs him as she returns from saying her goodbyes to Maddie and flops onto the lounge beside him. "I mean," Kate raises her plastered hand, "Obviously more in a supporting role, but..." She trails off. Cal has gone to set the girls up for the night, and Mike has just finished cleaning up the remnants of the dinner no one but the girls ate. Kate still looks sad - after all, this is not the sort of trauma that can be fixed with a few hugs and a cup of tea (or in Kate's case, an extremely strong coffee) But she  _does_ look slightly taller, as though a weight has been lifted from her shoulders, even as she turns her gaze to the door Maddie has just left through. "After that... it just makes me think... if I'd told her sooner..." Kate looks around sadly at the dull lounge room. She's unpacked all the boxes at least, touched the place up with sentimental knick-knacks and photos, but there's no denying it's still a crappy red-brick house, the best she could afford to rent. "I took Cal away from a life with a... a woman that loved her like a mother, you know? I mean, if Cal had stayed..."

"Hey!" Mike interjects. "And deprive her of your craziness?" He leans closer. "Look, I'm obviously a man. I mean, I'm a decent looking and quite charming man-" Kate snorts as he doffs an invisible hat. "-but I am just a man. But I know what makes a mother. A... a mother is selfless. She sacrifices her wants and needs for her children. A mother gives unconditional love. They support their children, they guide them and protect them. They're a role model, a friend. They're a safe place, a sanctuary. And from what Cal told me, that's you, Kate. It's always been you. You've been Cal's mother since the day she was born, regardless of whether you... you know... cooked her personally. She's yours, Kate. You couldn't have left her. And from what I've seen of Cal, you've done an amazing job." He bumps her lightly with his shoulder.

"This... complementing thing feels weird." Kate muses, but she's smiling all the same.

"Good. 'Cause I'm done. And now I'll go back to sarcastic comments and thinly-veiled propositions." He grins. "Now  _why_ are there twenty-eight rubber ducks in your bathroom?"

And Kate can't help but smile. "Well, first off, there's twenty-nine." She grins.

* * *

The next morning, however, she realises she has no idea why she agreed to come. Of course, logically she  _does_ know. She loves Maddie, always has, despite everything that has happened. It's just that, after a sleepless night of curling up next to her sister, or else jogging around town, standing outside Maddie's place,  _his_ place, feels a little like knocking on the den of a sleeping monster.

Maybe she could just run. After all, Cal would surely come to help in an instant, as would Mike.

But no. She's done with running. Done with hiding from her fears and trying to escape and all of those things she's spent years on. She's just done. And it's with a fierce determination that she bangs on the door.

Almost immediately, there's a sound, like a chair scraping along the ground. Then hurried footsteps, and the door opens to reveal a teenage girl standing behind the flyscreen, eyes wide. "Kate?" Her voice is little more than a whisper, and Kate has a fleeting memory of a five-year-old dressed as a fairy, running through a park.

"Claire." Kate takes a step forwards to get a better look at her, mentally calculating. She must be sixteen or seventeen now, her long dark hair hiding her eyes. "I... your Mum sent-"

"You should go." Claire whispers, keeping her voice low. Her head darts over her shoulder, looking at something Kate can't see, before taking a step back, away from the door. "It's okay. We're... we're okay. I'll see you soon."

"Claire, what-" Kate calls out, and Claire freezes in the act of shutting the door. "Is Sav here? Your Mum?"

"You need to go." Claire says again, more forcefully, and there's something staged about the words, as though she's an actress trying to project her voice as loudly as she can without yelling. For a moment they both stare at each other, still separated by the flyscreen. And then she takes another step back. There's a light clicking as her thumb brushes against the wire door before she shuts the wooden one.

Kate waits a full ten seconds before reaching out and pulling the handle of the wire door, not surprised to find it unlocked. Every fibre of her being is telling her to run, to call for help, because she's not sure what's going on, but Claire looks absolutely terrified, and it's clear that something is very wrong. And Kate can only come to one solution. Patrick.

And this time, it's more than knocking on the sleeping monster's den. It's sneaking into it, praying he's not awake inside and about to strike.

And it doesn't feel like it's just her that's risking her life. This time, it feels like she's risking her life, and Bridie's mother and Cal's sister and Mike's...  _whatever_ they are.

But she can't just stand here and do nothing. So she takes a deep breath, and opens the door.

The house is like a museum of the past, of  _him,_ even though she's never set foot in this place. She can't believe how many photos he's in, hates how comfortable he seems in this house with his family. She hates the shoes ever-so-neatly left by the door, and the wide, comfortable armchair in the lounge room. She knows from Maddie that they've long since sold the pub, used their savings to buy a place here, and she can't believe that after all these years of running, they're living barely half an hour away from her.

 _"Maddie, don't be stupid."_  The voice makes the hair stick up on the back of her neck, and Kate actually freezes on the spot, just out of view of the kitchen. She knows that voice, knows  _him,_ can practically smell him already, that disgusting stench of tobacco and beer. " _She's lying."_

Kate closes her eyes for a moment, feeling the weight of the moment wash over her. She's run into burning buildings, fought fires and collapsing buildings and sliding cars, but  _this..._ this requires a new sort of bravery. One she's not sure she has. And even though she'd known, really, from the moment she'd made that phone call to Maddie - really, from the moment she'd first seen them again in that car - that she'd have to come face to face with him once more, it doesn't make the decision any easier.

"Mum, we can just call the police. Mum!" Kate recognises Claire's terrified voice, and it's this that makes her step into view.

She's not sure what she's expecting to see but  _this_ is not it. She's expecting Maddie, maybe pummelled and on the ground, or else Claire and Sav at the mercy of a madman. But not this.

Claire is barely a metre away, Savannah throwing an arm around her and both shrunk against the kitchen cupboards. Maddie is standing in front of them both, arm outstretched. And on the other side, Patrick, squaring off like cowboys in a standoff, a silver knife glinting in Maddie's outstretched arm.

All four of them whip around as Kate enters, and even though she's shaking, she manages to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Patrick makes to step forwards, but Maddie brandishes her knife once more, and he stills, raising his hands to shoulder-height.

"You!" Patrick spits, the moment he sees Kate. "You and your fucking lies! I come home to surprise my wife and I find you've tried to poison her away from me!"

She can feel the panting breath on the back of her neck, hear his voice in her ear.  _It's okay, you're okay, we're fine. It'll make you feel good. It's okay._  And it takes more effort than it ever has, to wrench herself back to the present.

"She told me everything!" Maddie screams, and as Kate edges further into the kitchen, she sees there's great tear tracks running down her face, hands shaking. "Everything  _you_ did."

"Maddie, bloody hell!" Patrick turns around to look at her, his foot slipping on something. Kate looks down for a second, and sees a bouquet of flowers, evidently dropped and forgotten. "You're going to listen to her? She was a little manipulator from the start! I mean, look, we wanted to help her, but you know what happened with her family. How she lied about him too."

"Yeah, she told me about that!" Maddie calls out. " _And_  about why! She was a child! An innocent child brought into our home and  _you_ betrayed her trust. You're... you're evil, Patrick."

"You're a little bitch." Patrick spits at Kate. "Making up these stories. You're going to tear me away from my girls?" Kate throws a glance at Savannah, her arms still around her younger sister, who is sobbing hard. "Look at what you're doing to my family! And for what? Some sick twisted game?" He turns back to Maddie. "Look, Sweetheart. I promise you, she's lying. I'd never touch her. She... she was obsessed with me. But I never touched her."

"I had your baby." Kate cuts in, and, from the way Patrick's eyes widen, Kate can see that this is news to him. "You... you got me pregnant. You were my friend, my hero. And then you attacked me."

"Bullshit-"

"You filled up my drink, over and over again, and then you tried to kiss me, and when I pulled away, you pushed me onto the ground behind the bar. You grabbed a fistful of my hair and pushed my face into the ground. And you raped me. You got me pregnant. And you broke everything in me."

"I-" Patrick begins.

"I went through the office." Maddie spits. "I found photos. Photos of other women. Other girls. Girls crying, and naked. You're sick, Patrick. How many others?! How many?" She digs with her free hand in her pocket and throws a stack of polaroids on the floor. They scatter everywhere, sliding. Instinctively, they all glance down at the photographs. What Kate sees makes her stomach turn. The girls are barely teenagers. One is dressed in a teddy bear-patterned nightie. "You're going to jail! You're done! You're-" But Maddie stops, midsentence, her gaze on the photographs. Then, without warning, she lunges forwards and scoops one of the pictures up with her free hand. Still keeping the knife outstretched, she stares at the photograph, and as Kate catches a glimpse of it, she feels more ill than ever. Though the girl in the photo's eyes are squeezed shut, one hand thrown blindly over her face in an attempt to cover herself, it's clearly a younger Claire.

For a full ten seconds, there's nothing. And then, Maddie steps forwards and thrusts the picture into his chest. "Our own daughters?" She whispers.

Patrick turns a pleading eye towards the girls. "Tell her nothing happened. Girls-"

Kate has to fight the urge to be sick. How long had he been abusing them too? How many others? How many people could she have protected if she'd just spoken up before? The room starts to spin, and Kate is caught. She wants to run, run and never come back. She wants to hug Claire and Savannah and tell them how very sorry she is. Most of all, she wants to punish him for even  _looking_ at them.

"Claire," Kate says eventually, and her voice is quite flat. "Go with Sav. Call the police. They can... they can take him away." If her head wasn't spinning, she'd be surprised at how in control her voice sounds, how calm her words are, even when the very ground she's standing on feels like it's breaking. The girls look up, turning to their mother, clearly as torn as she is. "Go now!" She says, more insistently.

"Girls-" He begins, but Kate turns back to him.

"Don't!" Kate warns. "Girls, go!" They leave, still sobbing, and Kate feels her heart breaking for them. Kate stares at the spot where they'd left, before taking a shuddering breath and facing him once more. Maddie is still shaking, still holding the knife outstretched, barely thirty centimetres from him. "Maddie, it's okay. You can put the knife down." Kate tells her, taking a step closer. "Come on, Maddie. He's going to get locked away. He's going away for a long time."

"He hurt our girls." She mumbles, shaking her head dazedly. "He hurt you." Her grip on the knife tightens. "But he's never going to hurt anyone else again." And before Kate can even open her mouth to shout, she thrusts the knife into his chest.


	21. Chapter 21

For a moment, it's almost like they're play-acting. Like he'll suddenly pull the knife out from under his armpit or something and call out,  _ha, fooled you._ For a moment, Kate remembers years ago, how he used to do magic tricks, finding a coin from behind Cal's ear, or else pretending to pull off his own thumb. This feels the same. This feels staged. "P-Patrick?" She hates his name on her lips. He stands for a moment, hand clasped around the hilt. And then, slowly, blood starts to trickle through his fingers, a dark stain spreads over his shirt. He falls, knees hitting the tiled floor before he crumples like a puppet with his strings cut.

Then the sound starts, a horrible gurgling, rattling sound as he tries to breathe, eyes wide. "Maddie?!" Kate's voice cracks as she turns to the woman, still frozen in front of him, staring down at him as he slowly dies. "Maddie, what-"

She can't take it in. This, on top of everything, is too much. It's too crazy. It can't be happening. Slowly, Maddie lowers her hand, her fingers falling limply at her side. "He hurt them." She murmurs, her voice still sounding dazed. "He hurt them."

"You stabbed him!" Kate squeaks, and she can hear her own heart pounding in her ear. "Maddie-"

Kate falls to her knees, even though she's still metres away from him, travelling the rest of the distance on her hands and knees, skidding to a halt. And she can't stop herself from taking in the finer features of his face; his wide eyes, his perfectly ironed shirt. "Maddie, call an ambulance! And... and get the girls away. They... they don't need to see-"

"'elp... me..." He gurgles, eyes fixed on Kate. "'elp..."

Blood is pooling underneath him, and Kate feels it spreading, staining her jeans. Kate searches around desperately for something to hold the knife in place and stop it moving, but before she can even find something, his hand reaches up and grips the knife tighter. "No!" Kate shouts. "Leave it in. Don't-" But he rips the knife from his chest.

Almost immediately, more blood spurts, dark and hot. Kate claps her hands over the wound, pressing down, as he lets out a choking gasp. "Maddie!" She calls out again. "I need a... a towel. Something-"

"How can you try and save him?" Maddie cries, shaking her head. "After what he did?!"

"Maddie, please!" Kate calls once more.

He's jerking and twitching beneath her hands, still gurgling and rasping. Blood is bubbling at the corners of his mouth. And then...

He goes limp.

It's like a bad movie. A prank, or a trick or...

She puts a hand out to stop herself from overbalancing, but the hand slips along the ground. As Kate glances downwards, she sees the smeared and bloody handprint she's left. "Maddie?" Her voice is barely more than a breath. "Maddie?" Kate calls again, turning to the woman still slumped against the kitchen benches. "Maddie, he's dead." She can't keep the panic from her voice now. "Maddie..." It's almost a plead, and even though Kate knows she's the only one here and now that's still even remotely in control, she doesn't want to be the one to decide what happens next. "Maddie, please. I don't know what to do. Please, just tell me what to do!"

Maddie just stands there, still shaking, arm still outstretched. Feeling just as dazed, Kate pulls herself to her feet. She can't look at him. She doesn't think she'll ever be able to close her eyes and not see him. "He can't hurt them." Maddie murmurs softly. "He can't hurt them."

And despite her panic, Kate runs to Maddie and wraps her arms around her. "It's going to be okay, Maddie." Kate whispers. "He's gone."

* * *

She's sick of talking, sick of making statements, sick of shivering in the thin tracksuit and shirt they'd given her when they'd taken her clothes. She wishes she didn't know the full story. Wishes she hadn't been there in the first place.

She can still see his blood all over her, even though she's scrubbed and scrubbed until her hands were sore and her cast is sodden. She can still smell it, can still smell  _him,_ can still see the look on Claire's face and the look in his eyes and-

She doesn't register falling to the ground, or the voices around her. All she knows is there's not enough oxygen in the world and Maddie is going to jail and there's two more girls out there with nothing and no one. She tries to throw off the hands touching her, trying to lift her, trying to curl up into a ball. She just needs the world to stop, needs everything to stop. Because it's not fair, it's not fair at all. And she doesn't need the hands stroking her hair or trying to comfort her, she just needs Maddie to be free.

_It's okay. we're okay. It'll make you feel good. Can't you just let me make you feel good?_

_Help me._

_You're never going to hurt anyone ever again._

* * *

Kate pulls the phone to her ear and closes her eyes, leaning against the wall. Cal answers on the second ring, her voice high-pitched and panicked. "Kate?! Kate, where are you?"

"I'm..." She goes to brush her hair from her face, then realises that it's her bad arm. Her cast is falling apart from the water; she knows she'll have to get it reset. "I'm at the police station-"

Predictably, Cal's voice is shrill and panicked. "Police?! What-"

"I'm okay." Kate murmurs, fighting tears. "Please, Callie. Can you please just come and get me?"

* * *

"So he's dead?" Cal exhales, her hair flapping with her deep breath.

"Yes." Kate nods, but she feels numb. The news doesn't feel real somehow, as though she's just been deposited into a storyline she knows nothing about. Every step she takes, her head feels three steps behind. She wants to curl up into a ball and forget.

"And... and Maddie?"

Kate shakes her head sadly. "I don't know." She knows, realistically, that Maddie will have to pay for what she had done, regardless of what Patrick had done. But the injustice of it all wells around her, choking her like hot tar in her lungs. Claire, and Savannah. They'd essentially lost two parents that day. "The girls are at Maddie's sister's tonight. She came and got them after they'd-" She cuts herself off, knowing the questions the girls must have had to answer.

"It's not fair." Cal shakes her head. "This whole thing is so bloody unfair."

"I need to go to bed." Kate pulls herself to her feet and moves towards her room, more out of a need to be by herself than any actual tiredness. Cal says nothing; Kate knows her sister is suffering too, but Kate can't bear to add any more burdens upon her shoulders at the moment.

She gives herself five seconds after she closes the door. Five seconds to breathe, to lean against the heavy wood and just breathe. And then she collapses into tears. And it's not just herself that she cries for. It's Claire, abused by her own father. It's Savannah, knowing something was wrong and unable to protect her younger sister. It's Maddie, alone in a cell. It's Cal, for the unfair childhood they'd lead. And it's Bridie, who had no one to call Dad.


	22. Chapter 22

The sun is well and truly up when she wakes. Kate had tossed and turned until nearly four in the morning, plagued with the scenes of the previous day until finally, mercifully, she had drifted into an uneasy sleep. She doesn't rise though. Instead, she tugs the doona over her head and closes her eyes once more, willing her body to return her to the blissful state of unconsciousness so she doesn't have to think about how unfair the world is.

She hates that this is the world that Bridie will have to grow up in - one where she has to constantly watch what she wears, or says. Where she can't go out after dark alone, or feel safe catching public transport. Where people like Patrick get to live happy, normal lives and good people are left with... this.

But no. It's wrong to think of herself as 'good'. Kate's never been good; has been  _damaged_  goods from the moment she was born. A porcelain bowl, continually fragmenting and never quite glued back together correctly.

Bridie deserves better than this wreck of a family tree. She deserves a loving father, grandparents, brothers and sisters and aunts and uncles and cousins galore. But instead she'd gotten Kate, the barely-nineteen year old girl who had shut herself off from everyone but Cal.

"Katie?" As if on cue, there's a knock on the door and a moment later tentative footsteps and a light clinking on her bedside table. "Kate, I got you some toast. And a coffee."

"I'm not hungry." Kate mumbles into her pillow, willing sleep to just claim her again. Her whole brain feels foggy, dim and slow, a lethargic loop of blood and screams and death. She squeezes her eyes shut, willing her mind to rid her of that image.

She hears a shuffling of feet, and then Cal's voice once more. "Kate, you... you need to eat something."

"I'm not hungry, Cal." Kate repeats, her voice more forceful.

There's silence for so long Kate wonders if her sister has left. She knows, deep down, she's being unfair. That she's just left Cal to raise Bridie and hidden herself away from the world but, fuck, can't she just have a day? Can't she just try to forget for a little bit? And then, just as Kate is about to lift her head, Cal speaks again. "Okay. I'll... I'll take Bridie out."

* * *

Her limbs are too leaden to drag herself out of bed. Her arm, recast by a doctor yesterday at the police station, feels stiff and itchy, but Kate ignores it, keeping her eyes closed and willing sleep to take her over.

She's tainted. Broken. Damaged goods.

For most of the day she dozes, hanging in that state of confusion between sleep and consciousness, interrupted every few hours by Cal, depositing another fresh cup and plate on her bedside table and dutifully taking the cold and untouched leftovers. Once or twice, she hears lighter feet and uneasy breathing, and knows that Bridie has entered the room, but she knows if she was to try to talk to her daughter right now, it would make everything too real, so she lies shut and hates herself the moment her daughter retreats.

She hates herself. Hates herself for being this weak, for being the shell of the person the girls need right now, for being selfish and maudlin just like her own mother, but every time Kate raises her head and plans to face the day, her pulse quickens and her head spins, and really, it's easier just to lower her head once more.

The sky darkens outside. Kate has no idea what time it is, or what is going on outside, but she catches snippets of conversation and noise outside; Cal's low murmur, Bridie's excited chatter. When she catches a deep, male voice, Kate slips even lower into her doona, knowing all too well the only man who would drop by now.

Sure enough, barely a minute later, she hears heavy footsteps and Mike enters her room, closing the door behind him and, rather abruptly, perches himself at the edge of Kate's bed. She tenses, waiting for the smartarse comment. Instead, Mike just lies there, and it's Kate that breaks the silence. "I'm not in the mood, Mike." She mumbles. "Go away."

Of course, Mike doesn't go anywhere. Of course he wouldn't, when he's suddenly decided she is his pet sympathy project, or his own personal punchline for his hundred-thousand jokes, or whatever other perverse, selfish reason he wants to know her. But when Mike does speak, his voice is serious and low. "When Sarah died, I... I hid myself in my room for hours. I left Rosie with Mum and I just... hid. And it was excruciating. Because the silence only left me with the sound of my own head and my grief."

Kate swallows hard. Mike doesn't make to touch her, or move forwards any more, instead keeping to his corner of the bed. "I'm not grieving." It's the only thing she can think to say. No. She would never mourn the loss of Patrick.

"Aren't you?" Mike challenges. "Because it seems to be you could be. Just not in the way you expect." Kate tugs the doona from her face and stares at him. He shrugs. "Let me just... assume some things for a little. And I could be way off base but... the way I see it, when you got hurt, you lost your innocence. It drew a line between your childhood, your naivety, and a future where you knew first hand how cruel the world was. And all these years, despite everything that you've said and done, there must have been a part of you that believed one day you could see justice. And now... now that's gone, and you're grieving your innocence, the girl you were, the woman you've become. You're grieving the lack of justice and the life you lost. And you're also grieving the loss of  _their_ innocence. Maddie and Claire and Savannah."

Kate looks away, because she doesn't want to admit he's right. It's odd, that he can put her thoughts into words so easily.

"When Sarah died, I wasn't just sad for myself. But... how fucked up it was that I was all Rose had. That she deserved to have a Mum who was there and loved her and...  _alive._ And I guess you feel the same way about Bridie. But... eventually I learned it was better for Rose to have me just... be the best I could be... rather than feel sorry for myself all the time dwelling on what she  _should_ have had. And it was hard. But I talked to people. And it helped. And maybe it won't feel that way right away, but... but what I'm trying to say is it helps to... to talk and get up and... and it will get better, Kate. You've got to believe me."

"I... I just don't think I can face the world."

"I get it." Mike nods. "But how about, today, we just face your family? We'll get you up, you can have a shower and feel a bit better. Have a bit of food, even if you don't want it. And then we'll watch a movie with Bridie and Cal. And maybe tomorrow we'll... I don't know... walk around the block, and then come back and hide. We'll take baby steps, and things... things will feel better, Kate."

Kate turns to him, tears in her eyes. And then she nods.

* * *

Mike breaks everything down into tiny steps, and it's easier by far to focus on one little task at a time. She has her half a piece of toast, focuses on chewing each mouthful and nothing else. And after that, she showers, one hand encased awkwardly in a plastic bag. But focusing on one thing at a time helps, and by the time she's made it into the lounge room and found Mike already waiting with a movie lined up, she realises she's managed to do a dozen small tasks without breaking down.

For the most part, they sit in silence, and although she can feel Cal's worried gaze on her more often than not, she's able to find the strength to smile reassuringly at her sister, to hug her daughter, and to think about something other than her grief for the first time since everything had happened.

* * *

The next morning, Kate forces herself out of bed, much in the same manner as the day before. She finds it's easier to breathe somehow, taking her day one step at a time, and even though she's still exhausted and jumpy and wrung out, she manages to make her way into her daughter's room. Bridie is flung out in the middle of the sheets, and she finds herself marvelling at Bridie much in the same way as when she was a baby, that this is Kate's girl, her baby.

"Bee?" Kate murmurs, brushing a clump of hair back from Bridie's face. "Bridie, Sweetie, it's time to get ready to school." There's an unintelligable mumbling, then Bridie stretches and sits up, frowning.

"You're... you're taking me?" She mumbles.

"I am." Kate agrees. "If that's okay with you, I... I really just want to spend some time with you."

Bridie grins. "I'll be ready in a bit."

* * *

"Run, run, run, run, run!" Kate laughs, dragging Bridie's hand as they dash across the intersection just as the man flashes red. And it feels good, just to be carefree, with the cold ocean air stinging their cheeks, early-morning commuters staring and Bridie's hair flying in all directions. They slow to a walk as they catch up with the rest of the pedestrians, both laughing. "Oh, I totally should not be teaching you to jaywalk."

"It's okay." Bridie grins, tucking the hair behind her ear and readjusting her bag so that it's sitting better on her back. "It's nice just to see you."

Kate smiles sadly, but tries not to see the confession as her own failure. "Well, I'm sorry it hasn't been more lately. I know I've been... busy. And that's not okay. I just..."

"It's okay." Bridie repeats. "You had a lot to worry about." She hesitates for a moment, opens her mouth, and then closes it once more. Kate, knowing her daughter is holding something in, nods.

"Tell me." Kate encourages, smiling at Bridie. Almost unconsciously, she reaches out and untucks Bridie's collar from where it has flipped underneath her bag strap. "Remember. You can always tell me anything."

Bridie nods. It looks as though she's squaring her shoulders ready for battle. "It's just..." She begins, fidgeting with her bracelet. "I... well, he's dead, isn't he?" Kate doesn't have to ask who 'he' is. She nods, and Bridie continues. "Do I have to go to his funeral?"

The question takes Kate so by surprise she flinches, but forces herself to recover. "I... well... um..." She leans closer. "Did you want to?"

"No." Bridie shakes her head, then winces, as though she's worried she's upset Kate. "I mean, if I have to. I mean, we went to Mrs Nell's funeral but that was because she was our neighbour, but... I didn't know if I had to. I don't know... what's usual. What's expected."

"No." Kate shakes her head. "You don't have to go. And neither do I. We don't... we don't owe him anything. But if it's something you want to do, I... I can come with you. It's your decision, okay?"

Bridie slows, her fingers pressing another crossing button over and over again. "He's not my dad." She spits eventually. "I mean, he  _is,_ but... he's not, you know. He was a monster and now he's dead and I... I should feel bad, but I don't."

"You don't have to feel anything. Okay? You're... you're allowed to feel however you want. It's... it's hard. But Mike's been trying to make me see there's... there's no wrong way to feel."

"So... am I a bad person if I'm happy he's dead?" Bridie's voice is barely more than a whisper, and Kate can tell this has been weighing on her.

"No." Kate says. She stops, pulling Bridie aside and crouching so that she can better look into her face. "You, Bridie McGregor, are not a bad person. You have never been a bad person. And there is nothing you could do that could ever change who you are inside."

For a moment they look at each other, mother and daughter, and then Bridie nods, and she seems to relax a little more into herself. "That's what Rosie said." Bridie murmurs. "When I talked to her."

"She's right."

"It's... it's funny." Bridie shrugs, and Kate finds herself wrapping an arm around Bridie. She'd been getting older, and Kate found she did this less often, not wanting to embarrass her ever-growing daughter. However, now she finds all she needs to do is hold some part of this miracle. "Because I can talk to her and so many of the things we're feeling are the same but... but different, you know? But it's nice to talk to her." Bridie looks up. "Does it help you too, having Mike to talk to?"

"Yeah." Kate agrees. "I mean, he's annoying, but... but he's good."

Bridie smiles. "He's funny." She agrees. "And... and he likes you." Bridie fiddles with her nail polish. "Mum, if you wanted to... to be with Mike and... and have a normal family, that's okay. Or with anyone, really. You... you deserve to be happy."

"Hey," Kate grins, pulling Bridie slightly closer to her. "I am happy, with you and Aunty Cal. You are my... unnormal, normal family. Never forget that, okay?"

"I know, but... but if you wanted... I'd be okay. He's a good guy, Mum."

Kate nods, squeezing her daughter's hand. "Yeah, he is." She agrees. "And I love you, kiddo. More than anything, okay."

* * *

For the next few weeks, Mike and Rosie seem to spend almost as much time at their place as they do out of it, the camp bed permanently set up in Bridie's room and Mike occupying the lounge. And it helps, to have him there, especially when Cal goes back to uni and the girls are at school. He's by her side each step of the way, as she is called in to make follow up statements at the police station, or to wait outside as she visits Maddie in remand, or else to be there by her side as Kate goes to visit Claire and Savannah. And even though she's still overwhelmed by the injustice of it all, she can't help but be glad he's there.

When Kate emerges from the police station once more it's to see Mike, dutifully waiting. He stands when he sees her, raising a cup. "Got you a coffee." He smiles. "Not as strong as your usual, but still..."

"Thanks." Kate nods and takes a gulp, more for something to do than any real thirst. "They've offered to reduce her charge to manslaughter if she pleads guilty. Something to do with voluntary manslaughter by provocation. She's... she's going to take it."

"And... and what does she get?"

"Ten years. Possible parole in five." She aims a kick at a rock on the ground. It skids away. "She told the girls yesterday she was going to take it. They're staying with her sister at the moment. In therapy. I..." Kate trails off and squeezes her hands into a ball. "It's... it's unfair. And I know me saying that means nothing, changes nothing. But... it's unfair. She did the wrong thing but... but she did it for the right reasons and she's suffering and he never had to."

"I know." Mike agrees. "It seems so wrong that someone like her has to suffer when someone like him..." He trails away. "I used to think the same thing. Like why do these... these scumbags who murder and rape get to live, and Sarah didn't. But... but I know that's not the way the world works, as much as I want it to." He turns to Kate. "And... and I like to think things happen for a reason. Even if we don't quite know what those reasons are. It helps, for me, to think there's some... cosmic plan or something. Or stars aligning or... or something."

"I never used to believe in fate. Or destiny or any of that bullshit. But... I think it would be nice for there to be a... a plan." She smiles at him. "And... if I hadn't have had the life I had, I wouldn't have Bridie. I wouldn't have Cal and... and I wouldn't have met you."

They walk down the street, with no real destination in mind, and Kate's sure his thoughts are probably just as faraway as hers are. "Mike..." She begins. "I... I want to say thank you. For being here. And for trusting me with your... your family and... and your memories of Sarah. She... well, I would have loved to have been able to meet her. And Rose is very lucky to have you as her Dad."

Mike turns to look at her, nodding intently. "Well, I'd... I'd say that was almost a compliment." He grins, before reaching out and squeezing her hand. "Any time." He says, in a more serious tone. "And  _I_ just want to say... I don't take it lightly. It's... I feel honoured that you've trusted me by letting me in. And letting me spend time with Cal and Bridie. They're... they're amazing. And just so you know... well, you are too."

"Mike?" Kate begins again. "When all of this is over, and... and I've figured out my head... would you... do you think we could try the whole  _us_ thing again?"

Mike's smile widens, but he keeps his gaze fixed ahead. She rolls her eyes, wondering vaguely what smartarse comment she's going to get back this time, but she finds she doesn't really feel the embarrassment she predicted she might. A moment later, Mike nods. "I'd like that." He agrees, and his hand still clutching hers, they walk back down the street.


	23. Chapter 23

Kate hears her door creaking open and peers through the darkness, catching sight of Cal's distinctive figure almost immediately. A moment later, her bed dips, and she feels it move as Cal readjusts herself.

"Comfy?" Kate frowns, reaching out a finger to blindly poke her sister. It's not that she's annoyed, on the contrary, Cal's been doing this ever since she was a kid, and the best conversations Kate has with her sister seem to be in the middle of the night. Even so, she can't resist teasing her.

"Very." Cal replies, injecting as much dignity into her words while wearing fluffy pyjamas and rattling a plastic bag. "I bring snacks."

"Midnight feast?" Kate grins, reaching up along her wall and flicking a switch. A moment later, a curtain of fairy lights break the darkness. Cal smiles appreciatively and runs a finger along one of the light strings while Kate sets out the Pringles, Maltesers and Gummy Bears Cal has brought with her.

"Hey, when you know, you know. And I  _know_ I'm feeling snacky." She takes two Gummy Bears and sucks on them slowly. Kate can't help but resist the small smile that tugs at her lips. Ever the pacifist, Cal couldn't stand biting into any lolly or chocolate that was shaped like an animal, instead letting it melt in her mouth. At five years old, Cal had told Kate it meant  _the teddies can still play all together in my belly,_ and she hadn't changed her habits since. "So, are we allowed to talk about the elephant in the room? Or, I guess the man in the lounge room? Why is he on the lounge and not in here with you?"

"I knew that's what you came in to talk about!" Kate rolls her eyes and takes a handful of Maltesers.

"Well, you now I live vicariously through you. And he's a pretty good guy. Or he seems to be, anyway. I don't know why you haven't dived in yet. Or... on? Under?"

"Cal, it's... it's not a  _dive in_ situation. You and I are different. You... you love with your heart. I... I love with my head?"

"Weird analogy. But alright, then." Cal rearranges herself primly on the pillows and turns to her sister. "So let's  _Kate McGregor_ this. Your first concern, Bridie. Does he like Bridie? Does Bridie like him? Is he kind to her, gentle, caring? Does he look after her?" Cal turns to Kate. "You know the amount of people you've let take Bridie to school besides you and I? No one. Until Mike. Second concern, your baggage-"

"Alright, you're doing this all wrong." Kate interjects. "My first priority is my girls. Girls, plural. You and Bridie." For a moment, Cal looks as though she's about to cry, but then she opens her mouth. " _And_ I know you like him too, so that's that point still a yes. But just so my darling sister knows, I am capable of figuring this out myself."

"But you don't do anything!" Cal points out. "It's... so much has happened, I feel like we're in bloody... chapter twenty-three or... or season four  _at least._ It's not slow burn anymore. It's... sputtering candle running out of wick."

"And  _that's_ not a weird analogy?" Kate challenges, folding her arms and shifting slightly, accidentally nudging the can of Pringles over. Keeping her faze fixed downwards as she re-rights the can, she confesses, "I asked him out."

"You  _what?!"_ Cal shouts, apparently forgetting it's the middle of the night and the house has three other people sleeping.

"Shhh!" Kate frantically shushes her sister, very nearly poking her in the eye as she goes to place a finger over Cal's mouth. "Do you want to wake everyone up?!"

"Sorry! Sorry!" Cal mimes twiddling a volume dial before turning to Kate. "But you asked him out?! Why didn't you tell me? This is..." She looks around. "Would have saved me $7.20 on the snacks if I had have known that one! Details!"

"There... there are no details. I just... sort of asked him if he wanted to go on a date with me. And he said yes." She shrugs, but she's not able to suppress the smile that splits her face.

"And?" Cal presses.

"And..." She frowns, not sure what else her sister is seeking. "We held hands a little. That's it. And so now you know everything..." Kate shifts slightly, resting her head on her sister's shoulder. "What's going on in  _your_ love life?"

* * *

She hadn't exactly thought through the practicalities of making her own cup of coffee one-armed. After all, she's been surrounded by people everywhere bringing her coffee and food every half-hour or so, but now the house is all asleep but for her and her caffeine withdrawals. She's just wedged the coffee tin between her knees and is attempting to open the jar when a voice breaks her concentration.

"What on earth are you up to?" Mike grins.

Kate jumps. The coffee tin lands on the floor with a loud bang and rolls, the spoon clattering just next to it. "Shit." Kate curses, spinning around and knocking her coffee mug from the bench in the process. "Shit." She curses again, freezing in her spot.

"Graceful." Mike grins, eyes raking down her. "You're barefoot. Stay there. I'll grab a broom. Are you okay?"

"I just wanted a coffee!" Kate half-whines, staring at the mess on the ground, before throwing her good hand up in the air. "And everyone was asleep."

Mike returns to the kitchen, broom in hand, and curses. "Kate, your foot."

"What?" She frowns and looks down at it. There's blood. "Oh." She makes to lift it but Mike shakes his head.

"Stay there!" He repeats. "I'll come to you."

"I can fix it." Kate defends, but a moment later Mike has half-lifted her up and settled her on the bench. "Ouch. Taking some liberties there."

"It doesn't look too deep." Mike reports, taking a damp piece of paper towel and dabbing gently. "Looks like it's just a scratch. You got bandaids?"

"First aid kit is up there." Kate resigns herself to the fact that he won't let her clean herself up and gestures vaguely towards the cupboard under the sink.

"Mickey Mouse?" Mike frowns at the lurid bandaids. "Nice." She twitches slightly as his fingers touch her bare feet. He chuckles, jabbing a finger into her foot. "Ha! You have ticklish feet!"

"Piss off." Kate grumbles, steeling herself this time for his touch. She expects him to take advantage of this piece of knowledge, but to her surprise he applies the bandaid quite quickly and grins at her.

"Well, I think you're going to live." He puts his hands out as though he's about to lift her down from the bench top, but then seems to think better of it. "Oops. Sorry. Force of habit. Usually it's Rosie I'm patching up. Although..." He turns a critical gaze to her. "I don't feel like she's had as many injuries in her life as you've had in these last few months."

"Hmm... ever since I met  _you._  You haven't put a curse on me or something? Or do you just enjoy sweeping in and playing knight in shining armour."

"You're too stubborn to ever be a damsel in distress." He smiles at her, and something in Kate shifts.

For a moment they look at each other. And then Kate leans forward and kisses him, and Mike responds just as enthusiastically, so that for a moment he's nearly lifting her off her feet. A moment later one of his hands comes to rest on her hip, and the shift in weight sends him crashing into her, trapping her wrist between them. He pulls apart.

"Shit. Sorry." He mumbles. "Are you-"

"Fine." Kate cuts him off, pulling him closer once more.

"Knew you found me irresistible." He grins, capturing her lips once more.

"Bastard." She murmurs between kisses. "Chauvinistic. Prick."

"Stubborn." He mutters. "Beautiful."

She isn't sure how long they both stand there, mere oxygen insignificant compared to each other. All she knows is, all of a sudden there's a clearing of someone's throat, and her and Mike whip around to see Cal standing in the doorway, both hands held out shielding Rose and Bridie's eyes. "Well..." Cal drags her word out, a cocky grin on her face. "I will take my  _Cal is right_ presents in the form of confectionery, bath bombs or hair dye, thank you very much. Girls, back away very slowly, or else face therapy." Kate feels her face flush. "Oh!" Cal continues. "When you're finished your little make-out sess, maybe one of you want to clean up the broken glass?"

"I..." Kate croaks, one arm still wrapped around Mike's neck. "I was... trying to make coffee?" She mumbles.

"You make out with all your baristas?" Cal quips, calling over her shoulder, "If you can't be good, be careful!"

Kate turns back to Mike, ducking her head for a moment and willing the redness in her cheeks to subside. "Well..." He begins tentatively, pressing a brief kiss to Kate's shoulder. "Guess we don't have to tell the kids."

* * *

"Was beginning to think you'd moved house without telling me." Maxine's voice calls as she climbs out of her car and walks down Mike's front drive. He lifts a hand in lazy greeting as Rose drops her school bag on the front path and runs to hug her. "Hey, Rosie." Max presses a kiss to the top of Rose's head, before following her back towards Mike.

"We've been... staying at a friends." Rose explains with a tentative look towards her father. "Are you staying for a bit, Aunty Max?"

"If that's okay with your Dad?" Maxine answers.

"Yeah, sure. Of course. Cuppa?" He leads the way back towards the house, Rose dashing towards her bedroom while Mike and Maxine make their way into the kitchen. "Rosie, can you throw your dirty clothes into the laundry?" He calls after her, before turning back to Maxine. "Sorry, Max. Been meaning to call you to organise a catch up. It's just with everything-"

"It's alright." Maxine waves away his apology. "I heard what happened. It's..." She tips her head to one side for a moment, choosing her words. "Well, it's a fucking mess is what it is. But..." She heaves a heavy sigh and takes a seat on one of the bar stools as Mike glances into his fridge.

"Ah... milk's gone off, I'm afraid. Long life okay?"

"It's all good. Black's fine." She fiddles with a strand of hair. "How's Kate doing?"

"She's..." Mike fills the kettle, stalling for time, mulling over her words. "About as well as can be expected, I suppose. Good days and bad, I guess. Like us."

Maxine nods soberly, and for a moment he knows they've both gotten lost in their own minds and the pain of yesteryear. She gives a slight shake before apparently pulling herself together and grinning. "And my sources tell me you two were busted mid-make-out session by some kids."

Mike rolls his eyes, grinning. "Why, your sources spread their news fast." He raises his voice slightly, but receives only a muffled laugh from the direction of the laundry. Returning to his normal volume, he frowns. "And... did your sources tell you if they were okay with that?"

"Are you kidding?" Maxine pats Mike on the shoulder. "She's probably already picked the flower girl dress." Taking one look at Mike's goofy smile, she raises an eyebrow. "And judging by your lovestruck expression, she's not the only one."

Still smiling, Mike places Maxine's cup of coffee in front of her. "We're taking things slow, Max."

"Well, just remember... life's short, Mike. And I'm happy for you." She takes a sip of coffee, and adds. "So... tell me about the famous Kate?"


	24. Chapter 24

"So..." Bridie begins, kicking her legs forwards and backwards to propel herself on the swing. "You kissed Mike. Does that mean he's your  _boyfriend_?" She says the last word in an annoyingly sing-song tone, a wicked grin on her face. Kate, on the swing next to her, rolls her eyes, her own feet moving in rhythm too.

"You're incorrigible." She retorts, sticking her tongue out, every bit as childish as her daughter, before adding tentatively. "Would it be okay if he was?"

"Sure." Bridie says simply. Kate turns to her, raising an eyebrow, and Bridie rolls her eyes. "Well, he's nice, he's funny, he knows how to braid hair and cook and he has boats, which means we can go swimming more."

"I mean, I think the idea of the boat is to  _avoid_ the swimming?"

"Well, I like swimming!" Bridie protests, dismissing Kate with a wave of her hand. A moment later she seems to realise that Kate is making fun of her, because she pulls a face. " _Plus_ he's the first guy you've actually  _told_ me you like, which... must mean he's pretty special.  _And_ if you got married, that means Rose could be my sister."

"Well..." Kate realises that on two moving swings probably wasn't the best place to have this conversation; she's starting to get nauseous twisting around to look Bridie in the eye, not to mention her momentum is slightly off with her only being able to cling to the chain with one hand. "We're not talking about getting married. Just... going out together. Sometimes with you guys and sometimes just ourselves." Kate stops kicking her legs and drags her feet into the bark to slow the swing, waiting until she can get out and stand in front of Bridie (though well out of the way of flying limbs) before she adds, "You know you and Cal are the most important people to me, right? Regardless of what happens with Mike. I would always choose you."

"I know." Bridie nods seriously. "But Mum... I don't think Mike is the sort of person that would  _make_ you choose."

Kate smiles softly at Bridie's character assessment. "No." Kate agrees. "I don't think he is."

For a moment Bridie just swings, pumping her legs so that the swing goes higher and higher, eyes squeezed shut, and Kate wonders vaguely whether Bridie is pretending she's flying, like she used to when Bridie was younger, still stuck firmly in her obsession of Enid Blyton's  _The Wishing-Chair._ Kate leans against the frame of the swing, watching Bridie with interest, remembering the stories that Bridie used to recount of her imaginative adventures with Winx the Brownie, easily her favourite character.

"Mum?" Bridie breaks the silence, her voice soft even as she continues her swinging. Kate hums in affirmation, raising a hand to shield her eyes from the sun as Bridie continues. "Does this mean we're going to move again? Because I think you  _just_ unpacked the last of the boxes. And Rose and I  _kind_ of used a few to make a fort?" Kate can't help but chuckle at the tentative admission.

"Not now." Kate promises. "If and when that happens, it's a decision for us all, okay?"

Bridie nods, kicking her legs eagerly once more. "First one to go all the way around the swing is the winner!" She declares.

Kate gestures towards her plaster, already climbing back onto the swing. "If I break another limb, I think Cal will kill me."

Bridie laughs out loud. "Is it a risk you're willing to take, or are you a yellow-bellied coward?!" She calls in an exaggerated voice.

For a moment, Kate simply stares and marvels that this girl, this beautiful, kind-hearted, hilarious and  _perfect_ girl is hers. A moment later, the musing is interrupted by chicken noises. "You're on." Kate declares, clambering once more onto her swing. "And then, how do you feel about stopping by the firehouse?"

* * *

It's Nikki who spots her first, perched cross-legged on a table, her slinky top and sleek jeans telling Kate she's obviously off-duty. Abandoning her conversation with ET, she grins widely, squealing in delight. "You're back!" She clambers down and makes as though she's about to hug Kate, before seeming to think better of it as she catches sight of the cast. "Oops. Just imagine I'm hugging you. It has been  _super_ dull without you around. And... is this the famous Bridie? I mean, I don't think I've met her properly but she is freaking adorable!"

"Hello." Bridie grins, uncharacteristically shy at Nikki's enthusiasm.

"Bridie, this is Nikki, a paramedic. Nikki, Bridie." Kate introduces, but Nikki has no more time to converse as they find themselves swarmed by the rest of the crew.

"You're back!" 2Dads grins, Spider hot on his heels.

"Not just yet." Kate tips her head. " _Apparently_ a broken wrist rules me out for eight weeks at least. But I was going mad at home. So I thought we'd drop by."

"There's a cat!" Bridie squeals, dashing off suddenly towards the fluffy mass seated in Charge's usual spot on the lounge. "Aww, what's its name?"

"We're not sure." Dutchy pats the cat idly, but Charge throws it the filthiest of looks.

"It turned up here three days ago. And  _someone_ decided to start feeding it." He turns his glare towards Nikki, who rolls her eyes.

"He was skin and bones!" She protests. "Have a heart,  _Andrew_!"

" _Anyway!_ " Dutchy interrupts, turning to Kate. "What have you been up to while you've been slumming it at home?"

"Slumming it?" Kate scoffs good-naturedly. "I have been hard at work, let me tell you. Tell him, Bee."

"Mum, can we take the cat home? Please?" Bridie begs, taking no notice of Kate's words.

Kate says "no" at the exact moment Charge says "yes". She glares. "So what's been going on here?" She asks, trying to keep the subject away from stray cats.

Spider shrugs. "Well, the temporary guy we've got replacing you is kind of cool. Not a patch on you though. But Cliff's a martial arts freak like Buff, so they get on well." Buffer clears his throat and Spider gulps. "I mean, I didn't mean  _freak_ as in..." He trails off.

"What else is happening..." 2Dads hums, trying valiantly to save Spider. "Ah...  _oh,_ we had to rescue some guy actually stuck up a chimney. And... Spider got to do a full-on apartment building balcony rescue." He grins at Kate. "Nikki and ET are  _still_ not getting married, despite making out for nearly an hour here the other day." He dodges ET's hit, but Nikki's slap to the back of the head is well on target. " _Ouch!_  Did you see that, Bridie? Blatant assault of a firefighter."

"You kind of deserved it." Bridie muses, smiling at Nikki.

"What?!" 2Dads scoffs. "I thought we were mates!"

"Uteruses before duderuses." Bridie replies simply.

"You have been watching too much  _Parks & Rec _with your aunt." Kate mutters, dragging a hand over her face. "Last week it was  _treat-yo-self._ "

"Which is why we should get a cat!" Bridie interjects. "Then, I would be spending more time with Catalie Portman and less time watching TV."

"Is that seriously the name you're going with?" Kate frowns.

Bridie hesitates for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, I'm feeling pretty confident about it."

"When are you coming back?" Buffer interjects, speaking for the first time.

"Whenever I am cleared." Kate replies. "I hate being on sick leave. It's so boring. Even  _I'm_ watching too much  _Parks & Rec."_

"You can never watch too much  _Parks & Rec._" Bridie mutters, high-fiving ET, who nods.

* * *

Kate stops in the doorway of Mike's workshop, leaning against the doorframe and taking a moment to admire Mike as he dutifully sands back the sloping wood. From what Kate can see, the canoe he's carving is beautiful, made of a deep red wood and beautifully finished, although she must admit (if only to herself) that it isn't really the woodwork she's admiring.

A moment later, however, Mike turns around, cocking an eyebrow. "Like what you see, McGregor?" He quips, resting his sandpaper block on a nearby benchtop. She simply rolls her eyes, not willing to deal with the inevitable ego-boost that will occur if he knows she was checking him out. Of course, she knows she's not fooling him, but mercifully he changes the subject. "What have you been up to today?"

"Just been around town." Kate sighs. "Popped into work to say hi."

"Should I be jealous?"

"Of a bunch of hot firies?" Kate grins, moving closer to him. "Hmmm..." Something in Mike's gaze seems uncertain, so she leans forward and presses her lips to his, trying to convey without words that he has no need to be jealous. He responds with enthusiasm, however when he pulls away the look is still there. "What's up? I assure you, Bridie was there. It was all very professional. Also, I now have a cat."

"Okay." Mike looks perplexed for a minute. "Passing over the feline part, it's just..." He hesitates for a moment. "I guess... I knew you'd go back to work eventually. But... all of this... it was... it was close, Kate."

All of a sudden she can't look at him, and for a moment she hears the roaring of that building, that gurgle as Patrick took his last breath. "I know." Kate murmurs, turning her head away. Suddenly, the conversation is completely sober. "And... I can't promise that nothing will ever happen. You know that. But..."

"I know. It's who you are." Mike nods. "And I know I'm never going to stop worrying about you. I guess it's just something we'll have to live with."

"We?" Kate challenges, moving closer to him.

"Yep." Mike nods, resting his hands on her hips. "We. I'm going to be overprotective of you and Bridie and Cal, and you're going to be... wildly sarcastic and demanding until I ply you with coffee and chocolate."

" _Milk_ chocolate." Kate adds, moving closer still.

Mike nods. "Milk chocolate." He agrees, as he closes the distance.


	25. Chapter 25

She doesn't bother to knock, instead sending a quick text message while trying to stem the guilt at dropping by so late. It wasn't as if he hadn't told her to do so - many times in fact. But she still had to fight the general feeling of being an inconvenience as she stood on the front doorstep, tugging her cardigan tighter around her.

There's a clattering of locks, and a moment later Mike pulls open the door, holding it open and inviting her to slip inside without comment. The house is dark and he makes no effort to light their way, but her eyes are accustomed to the dark anyway, and she's able to follow him with ease as he leads her into the kitchen. "Watch your eyes." He murmurs, a moment before pressing a button on the extractor fan, illuminating them both in a soft orange light. "Water?"

He's already flicked the kettle on before she can respond  _coffee,_ leaning back against the bench top and peering at her critically. "Nightmares again?" He enquires. "I've told you, I know the giant teddy  _seems_ scary, but he's just a dream, okay?" The quip breaks the tension that's been mounting in Kate, and she feels the weight fall off her shoulders as she laughs. "You didn't have to travel all this way just to see me."

"I ran out of coffee." She murmurs softly, raising a hand to fidget with her necklace in an absent-minded sort of way. "Is Rose asleep?"

Mike nods soberly. "Well, most people are at two in the morning. Have you slept at all?"

"A bit." Kate shrugs evasively, even though she knows Mike would have seen right through her lie anyway.

"Uh-huh." Mike says sarcastically, confirming Kate's thoughts. However, he doesn't press her, and for that, she's grateful. "So, what time does your shift start?"

"Six am." Kate half-laughs as Mike turns to her once more, eyes boggling at the early hour. "Yeah, I know. But we're not all self-employed and able to sleep in 'til noon."

"Well," Mike begins, scooping coffee and sugar granules into a mug. "How about you get through the day, and I take you out to dinner afterwards? And just so there are no awkward misconceptions, I would very much like it to be a date."

Kate doesn't even bother to smother her smile. "Well... I... I guess I'd have to check my diary. You know. I live such a full life and... so many guys to keep track of."

"Well, let me know." Mike shrugs. "Only reason I can fit you in is I had a last minute cancellation. I'm a busy guy. And I'm irresistible."

"With tickets on yourself." Kate bumps him lightly with her shoulder. "And... yes." She tucks her hair behind her ear and adds, "To dinner. Not the irresistible thing."

Mike hands her a mug of coffee and pours himself a glass of water, lowering his voice. "You know, Kate... if you're not ready to go back to work..."

"It's not that." Kate shakes her head, because that isn't the problem. Well, at least, not entirely. "It's... it's just... my head is just so full of noise that every time I try to shut my eyes I'm thinking all this... stuff..." She trails off, making a conscious effort to release the chain of her necklace before it breaks.

Mike sighs and leans against the bench top. "Like why does the penguin in  _Octonauts_ wear a scuba mask?" Mike supplies, nodding seriously. "That show opens up so many questions. Like, the cat I get. But the penguin? I mean, that show was nowhere near as weird as Telletubbies."

Kate snorts with laughter, perching on the bench top and smiling at Mike. She'd known if anyone could get her out of her own head, it would be him. "Bridie never watched it. It weirded me out too much. That baby-sun thing?"

"I know! Like... did the mother breed with the sun to create this half-solar, half-human baby that just giggles in the sky? Did it just appear one day? Is it a harbinger of doom? And let me tell you, there were some suggestible scenes with Tinky-Winky and that vacuum cleaner."

Kate claps a hand to her mouth to stop herself laughing out loud. Catching Mike's curious glance, she explains, "I just didn't think hearing you say 'Tinky-Winky' would ever be a thing I'd need in my life. So was that Rose's obsession?"

"No. Rose's obsession was  _Thomas the Tank Engine._ And let me tell you, heading to the bathroom at one in the morning and accidentally kicking a toy which then starts 'choo-chooing' and whistling and takes off God-knows-where? I mean, not as painful as stepping on Lego but at least Lego doesn't have batteries and take off on you." He winks. "So... what was Bridie's?"

"Well... she watched a few kids shows. Cal got her into  _Saddle Club_ and  _Ocean Girl_ but mostly she just watched whatever we did. Old movies mostly. And anything with fairies in it." Mike rummages in a cupboard above her for a moment before withdrawing a tin of biscuits. Kate takes one, smiling softly. "I'm sorry I'm keeping you up in the middle of the night. I just... needed..."

"Me." Mike finishes with a grin, waving his hand around in a flourish. "Hey, like i said. I  _am_ irresistible." He peers closer at her, his expression softening. "You look exhausted, Kate. Come to bed." He gently extracts the coffee mug from her hands and tugs at her. "Stay here tonight." Catching her gaze, he grins. "I promise to be the perfect gentleman."

* * *

"So... first day back then?" Dutchy grins as he overtakes Kate on her way to the locker room, spinning around to walk backwards so that he can continue to face her. She feels a flash of irritation at the spring in his step, and the obvious health radiating from him when her own body is still stiff and sore, not to mention exhausted by the mere three-and-a-bit hours sleep she'd managed at Mike's last night before she'd had to head into work. "A ray of sunshine as ever. How are you feeling?"

"People need to stop asking me that." Kate mutters, resisting the urge to roll her eyes, feeling it would do very little to help the headache pounding behind her eyes. Realising just how bitchy her words sound, she hastens to add, "I'm fine, honestly. I've been looking forward to coming back for weeks. You know I am now fully unpacked? When we were in the mountains we lived in the same house for four years and I hadn't even unpacked then."

"How domestic of you!" Dutchy smiles. "But am I right in thinking that you might be moving again soon? I mean..." He gestures towards the front of the building. "A casual observer such as myself couldn't  _help_  but notice you arrived this morning from the complete opposite direction of your house. So... anything we should know about? That Mike guy  _was_ hanging around the hospital quite a lot." He blinks innocently at her and Kate rolls her eyes.

"And they say women are gossipy." She grins, dumping her bag in her locker and fishing out her uniform, moving around the corner to change and calling out, "How many girls have you gone through since I've been gone?"

"Believe it or not, I am still seeing Rachel." Dutchy calls back, voice echoing against the tiled walls.

Kate frowns as she pulls on her work shirt. "Which one was Rachel? Was she the one with the tattoo sleeves? Or the one that-" She adopts a breathy, high-pitched voice, "- _speaks like everything is, like, a question?"_

There's a soft chuckle from Dutchy's direction. "Rach is a builder. And you'll meet her if you ever join us at the pub. Maybe with your guy?" Kate rounds the corner to find him dressed and waiting for her. "That's if the boss doesn't have us all killed first."

"What do you mean?" Kate frowns, following him into the direction of the kitchen and, mercifully, the coffee machine.

"Oh..." Dutchy laughs, clapping her on the back. "Pray for an alarm, Kate. The Boss' favourite way of welcoming firies back after sick leave is drill after drill."

* * *

"Urgh. I'm so unfit." Kate groans as she sinks into a spot on the lounge, loosening her ponytail to ease the tension headache now settling there. She'd like nothing more than to lie on the lounge and sleep for the rest of her shift, but she knows it's definitely not an option, not just because Marshall will slaughter her, but also because her hands are still shaking and her pulse is beating hard in her neck, a sure sign she's probably overdone the coffee today. Cursing under her breath, she pushes herself to her feet once more, pacing backwards and forwards. "Break a bone and everything goes downhill."

"Pfft." Dutchy lets out a sceptical noise. "Come on! It's your wrist you broke, not your leg. You should be used to running! Although, I am going to have a massive bruise from bloody 2Dads and his harnessing fail." He groans softly as he rubs a hand over his hip. "And will you sit still? You're pacing like a toddler on red cordial."

"Too much coffee." Kate explains, not stopping her pacing. "And hey, it sure was one wedgie you won't forget any time soon. Is it always like this?"

"Oh yeah." Dutchy pulls his bottle of water closer and takes several large gulps. "Spide and Buff got poisoned once... some woman made them a crab dish to say thanks for saving her and... ultra food poisoning. Like, we were in lockdown thinking it was some weirdo toxin. Anyway, when they got back... it was like we were preparing for the apocalypse. Did everything short of learning to swordfight, I feel. Boss even got someone in to try and teach us parkour. It was brutal."

"What's that?" Spider interjects, walking into the room and wiping his sweaty brow.

"When you and Buff came back off sick leave." Dutchy explains. Spider groans.

"Be grateful you missed that one. My knees were purple for weeks from bruises. Looked like I was turning into a beetroot." He too takes a gulp of water before turning to face outdoors. "Seriously, it's like 50 degrees out there. Why is nothing on fire? Not even a teensy tiny grass fire. Instead, it's drill city."

Kate laughs but is interrupted from responding as Charge walks quickly in, muttering, "Boss is coming, boss is coming."

In an instant, Dutchy and Spider pull themselves to their feet and bustle about, evidently trying to make it look as though they're hard at work. Marshall enters, casting an appraising eye over them all before stopping on Kate and her twitching foot. "We're resuming in fifteen minutes." He reports, before leaving the room once more. Kate barely keeps in a scream of frustration.

Spider curses, and Charge heads to the fridge. Kate turns to Dutchy, muttering under her breath. "I feel like the boss is trying to make me crack or something. I'm so bloody tired."

Dutchy flashes her an  _I told you so_ sort of look. "Are you sleeping any better?"

Kate doesn't look up. "Who says I wasn't sleeping?"

"Well, your reaction for one thing." Dutchy supplies. "Plus, the bags under your eyes  _and_ experience. I mean, you had a freaking building drop on your head. After that, you're either going to be sleeping  _really well_ for the rest of eternity, or not at all."

"Cute." Kate muses, glancing at her watch. "And here I was hoping to actually put out fires. Instead, I get to do endless drills and talk about my love life."

Dutchy flashes her an amused grin. "And people say you can't have it all."

* * *

By the time Kate makes it to Mike's house, she feels about as date ready as if she'd just climbed out of bed. It's not that she doesn't want to see Mike; on the contrary, it's been one of the things getting her through the day. But the thought of going out, of facing other people, is almost too much to bear.

Mike pulls the door open, raising an eyebrow at her appearance. "Stay in and get Uber Eats?" He supplies, inviting her in.

"You're amazing." Kate responds, closing the distance between them.


	26. Chapter 26

The bright glow and the steady rumble of cars outside are the first thing Kate hears when she wakes. For a few minutes, she simply lies there, with the warmth of Mike encircling her, and relishes in the contentedness spreading through her. After a while, though, the pressure in her bladder means she has to move, and she tries to extract herself from his arms. Mike lets out a mumbled protest and tightens his grip on her. "No. Stay." He mutters.

"I'd love to." Kate whispers back. "But, hey, you give birth and then see if you can ignore the bathroom. I'll be back." Mike lets out another unintelligible mumble but releases her, and Kate scoops up a t-shirt on the way through. It's baggy and smells like Mike, falling almost to her knees. As she catches sight of herself in the mirror she can't wipe the wide smile spread across her face.

When she returns Mike is much more awake, smiling at her return. "I... I wasn't sure if you'd try to sneak out again." He confesses.

For a moment, Kate hesitates, then she slides back into the bed. "I'm done running." She murmurs back, capturing his lips once more.

* * *

"Do you reckon they'll have more kids?" Bridie enquires thoughtfully, raising her arms above her head, dodging as Rose extends an arm and pokes her lightly in the sliver of exposed belly as her sleep shirt rides up. "It would be cool to have a little sister too."

"I think so." Rose muses, idly drawing a cartoon baby on their list of ideas, so far only containing a few half-hearted suggestions, all with their own complications, usually money. "Dad always wanted more kids and... well, your Mum is still young too."

"We'd have to get a new house. I mean, our place is tiny and I guess your place would be big enough for us for a while, but if Mum  _did_ get pregnant, there'd be no room for a baby." Bridie gives her head a little shake, returning her gaze to the notebook in Rose's lap. "But we're getting off topic. What can we do to make your Dad hurry up and ask her to marry him?"

Rose chews on the end of her pencil thoughtfully. "Well, we've gotten them this far. I mean, volunteering them both for the disco was a great plan. And then we went out to dinner afterwards... it was just that that woman went into labour. Maybe if we cooked them dinner? Like... all romantic. With the roses and candles and stuff."

"Can you cook?" Bridie frowns, but nods all the same for Rose to write it down. "Because I don't think tacos or two minute noodles are proposal food." Bridie guesses by Rose's defeated look that the girl is no better a chef than she is.

"Okay." Rose chews on her pencil once more, brow furrowed. "Okay. What if your Mum got pregnant? Like... if we took her pill or... or whatever?"

Bridie nearly chokes on her water as she turns incredulously to her best friend. Rose leans forward and slaps her on the back. When Bridie has gotten her breathing under control she says, "I don't even know if she's on the pill."

"She is." Rose answers simply. Catching sight of Bridie's curious face, Rose adds, "She told me when she was explaining... you know... everything." Bridie barely suppresses a shudder. She's heard enough about periods from Cal and her Mum to hope it never happens to her, even though she knows it will.

Passing over her discomfort, Bridie continues. "Well, either way I don't think it's exactly right to trap our parents into having a kid, no matter how into each other they are." She reasons, tipping her head in thought.

Rose nods glumly. "Yeah, you're right." She agrees, crossing  _baby_ off the list. "I thought for sure after your Mum was in hospital it would be an  _I can't live without you_ kind of situation."

"Yeah, me too, to be honest. But hey, they're together now. Just... at snail's pace. And seriously, I don't have any pencils left without your bite marks in them."

"Oops." Rose removes the pencil from her mouth. "Sorry, Bee. So, any other ideas?"

Bridie screws up her face in concentration. "What about a boat trip? Boats are romantic! Plus, your Dad has some, doesn't he? He rents them out or whatever when he's not making canoes?"

"Yeah, except how do we get Dad to take Kate onto one of his boats without  _giving away_ that's exactly what we want?" Rose challenges, simply drawing a boat instead of adding the words.

"Maybe he'd just take her... like, for a date or something?" Bridie suggests tentatively. "I mean, what do adults do for dates?" Rose catches her gaze and Bridie shakes her head. "Aside from... that." They both giggle nervously.

"Okay. At sunset. If they go on a boat trip, it has to be at sunset." Rose declares.

"Why?" Bridie frowns at the sudden purpose in her words.

"Because..." Rose draws out the word, etching a sun on the page. "Everything is more beautiful at sunset. Everything is... is gold and pink and orange and... just pretty." She gets a dreamy look on her face and adds. "I want my first kiss to be at sunset."

The girls erupt into giggles once more. Eventually, Bridie recovers enough to say, "Maybe we should draft Cal in on Operation  _Fanning the Flames_ too."

"What has she got to offer?" Rose frowns. "Besides, like, her awesomeness."

"ID?" Bridie suggests. "She can... like... buy wine and stuff.  _We_ can't do that."

"So we're getting them drunk now?" Rose frowns, raising an eyebrow. "Might work, I guess."

"Hey, that's a good idea. Write that one down." Bridie declares, and the two erupt into giggles once more, only stopping when they hear footsteps coming towards Bridie's room. "Quick! That's Mum!"

"How can you tell?" Rose hisses, tucking the notebook and pencils underneath her pillow before dragging a couple of magazines at random to sit in front of them.

"She walks on her toes. Cal clunks." Bridie murmurs, just before a knock sounds at the door. "Come in."

Kate appears in the doorway, smiling at the two girls. "How are you both?"

"Good." They answer in unison. Bridie gives a nervous glance to Rose before adding, "How was your date?"

Rose barely stifles a chuckle as Kate flushes, her smile widening. "It was... nice. We... um... just ordered takeaway and watched movies."

"What sort of movies?" Rose calls, more excitedly than perhaps the situation warrants. Bridie throws her a questioning look.

"Uh... we watched  _Die Hard_ and  _RED._ " Kate answers, peering curiously between them. "Listen, I'll leave you girls to pack up Rose's stuff and Mike and I will be in the kitchen when you're ready."

As the door closes behind them once more, Bridie aims a pillow at Rose. "What was  _that_ question for?"

Rose grins. "Just seeing if they were watching rom-coms." She adopts a serious look. "But action movies? Dad's in more trouble than we'd thought." Her eyes widen. "But I have an idea."

* * *

Kate returns downstairs, peering at Mike curiously. "Um... our girls are up to something." She murmurs, jabbing a hand in the direction of Bridie's room.

Mike leans forward, obviously torn between amusement and concern. "Okay. What... what makes you think that?"

"Well, they both have never looked more suspicious as when I walked into that room, and... they asked me some weird questions."

"Weird?" Mike frowns, but Kate shakes her head, waving it away.

"Eh, they're probably just talking about us."

"Are we really that interesting?" Mike scratches his head in mock thought, just as the girls appear, Rose's bag at her feet.

"Hey, Dad." Rose moves forward to hug her father. "How was it?"

"Terrible." Mike muses. "Did you know Kate doesn't know how to eat with cutlery  _and_ wears socks on her hands? Crazy!"

"Da-ad." Rose groans. "Stop teasing her, or she'll never go out with you again."

"No, she'll come back." Mike assures Rose, ruffling her hair. "It's all part of my charm."

"Well, while you two are... you know, drinking coffee and all that, can we go for a quick walk around the block? Half an hour at most?"

* * *

"We're going to get in so much trouble if Mum catches us." Bridie warns as they walk down the Esplanade, pulling back slightly to let a bicycle rider past. "They said we could go around the block, not the shops."

"Kate and Dad are both back at yours. Besides, this won't take long, I promise." She tugs at Bridie's hand, leading her towards a wooden-clad cafe.

"Well, can you at least tell me who this 'other interested party' is?"

"All in good time. She's right... there." Rose assures her, catching sight of the blonde woman and walking forwards. The woman looks up and Rose leans forward to hug the woman. "Bridie, this is Maxine. Aunty Max, we need your help."


	27. Chapter 27

"You can't just  _force_ someone to propose, Rosie. You know that." Maxine reasons, falling into step with the girls, and even though she tries her hardest to look stern and serious, she can't help the slight twitch at the corners of her mouth as she thinks about just how intent these girls are, more serious in fact than Maxine has ever seen Rose.

"We're just trying to give them a push, you know?" Rose explains. "You know how pathetic Dad is with real emotions. He turns everything into a joke." Maxine privately agrees, but she resists saying so, not wishing to add fuel to the fire.

"And Mum's no better." Bridie chimes in, and Maxine feels that if this girl is anything like her mother, then her and Kate will get along like a house on fire. "I mean, this is the first guy I've actually  _met,_ and that's only because Rose is in the picture. Otherwise he'd just be another nameless, faceless reason why Mum is sometimes not home."

"They're both too scared." Rose sums up, as though summarising some long-winded speech. "And... we thought maybe if there was an adult, they might actually listen. I mean, Cal's in Kate's ear, but Dad has no one and-"

"I've already been in his ear, Hon." Maxine smiles wider at the incredulous looks on the girls' faces. "What? I'm not allowed to be a romantic? Kate's good for him. But... it is hard to put your heart out there again, especially after losing someone as special as your Mum, Rosie. Especially when you take into account what Kate does for a living." She rests a hand on Rose's shoulder. "You girls are completely on board with this and, believe me, as a parent that means a lot. You've taken care of their number one concern. As for the rest of it, I... I think you just have to let them figure it out." She narrows her eyes for a moment, before gesturing to the road. "Now, I think you'd both best be getting home before your parents freak. And, before you consider it, pretending to go missing is  _not_ the right way to go about it."

* * *

"So... this Kate. Have you said the magic words yet?" Maxine tries to keep her voice as nonchalant as possible, her gaze fixed intently on the tomatoes she's dicing in front of her. And, yeah, maybe she's told Rosie not to interfere, but that doesn't mean  _she_ can't give him a gentle nudge (or indeed, a great big shove) in the right direction.

"What?" Mike splutters from his spot at the frying pan, pausing in his stirring of the onion. "Where did  _that_  come from?"

"Just curious." Maxine shrugs evasively, inwardly cursing that he had seemed to pick today to be ultra-suspicious. "I mean, you obviously  _feel_ that way. Just wondering if you've told her." She chances a glance up at him and smiles at the goofy look on his face. "Look at you! You've practically got heart-eyes every time she's even mentioned."

Mike shakes his head in a 'woe-is-me' sort of way, but returns to his onions without further protest. "Well, no." He admits. "Not yet. I mean, we haven't really been out yet on a proper date. She was absolutely beat from work the other day and her shifts have been all over the shop lately. I've hardly seen her, let alone... you know...  _that_. And,  _no,_ before you say anything, I'm not stalling. I'm just... being cautious. And... you know, barely seeing her."

"Well, as long as you're happy, okay? And... you know, not  _just_ turning to humour to mask any real feelings." She smiles softly and continues her cutting, even though she can feel Mike's gaze on her. A moment later, however, he interrupts.

"My daughter has been in your ear, hasn't she?" He accuses.

"What? No!" Maxine says, a little too quickly. Mike raises an eyebrow in her direction. "Okay, well, yes. If I'm honest, the girls were in my ear."

"Girls  _plural?_ " He freezes, turning to her. "When did  _you_ meet Bridie?"

"My  _point-_ " Maxine interjects, hoping she hasn't just landed Bridie into hot water. "-is that they weren't saying anything I wasn't already thinking, Mike. I care about you. And... you know, it's nice to see you happy." She grins. "I mean, I'd be happier if I could meet this particular woman but all the same."

"Well, look, Rose and I are seeing her on Saturday. I'll try and organise something with her then, okay?" He returns once more to the frying pan, adding the meat. "Just a bit scared you two will conspire against me. But now it seems it might be you  _four_ against me."

Maxine flashes him a sly grin. "Bros before hoes, Mike. I got your back."

"Cheers." Mike laughs. A moment later there's the sound of footsteps and they both look up to see Rose, resting against the bench top.

"Hi Aunty Max." She greets. "Um... how's things?"

"You..." Mike interjects, moving over to Rose and ruffling her hair. "Are too damn nosy for your own good." He grins. "I love you, Kiddo."

* * *

"So, Cal didn't want to come?" Mike questions as he twists and turns, taking in the flashing lights and the cacophony of sound.

"She's here already. Just too cool to hang out with her big sister apparently." Kate sniffs, though the smile on her face tells him she's not really upset. "Here with some uni mates. I'm sure they'll find some way to turn it into a protest about something and get arrested but... oh well, let's enjoy our time while we can." Kate turns to the girls. "What's first, Bee?"

"Fairy Floss!" Bridie calls automatically, leading the way throughout the crowds of people towards a bright pink stall. Mike raises his eyebrow at Kate, but finds her looking just as excited.

"What?" Kate murmurs when she catches his gaze. "Fairy floss is amazing! It's a staple food at carnivals."

"Can we, Dad?" Rose pleads, sticking her bottom lip out.

"Come on, Mike. It's not a carnival without fairy floss." Kate bumps his elbow lightly and he grins.

"Fine." He agrees. "My shout."

While she and Mike break into an argument about who is paying for what, Bridie and Rose hang back to whisper in each other's ear. "The Love Tunnel." Bridie says in Rose's ear.

"The...  _what?"_  Rose frowns. "I don't come to carnivals often, Bee. What's that?"

Bridie's eyes bug out at this fact. "What? Mum and I come all the time. Look, there's always some sort of romantic ride with... I don't know... love hearts and swans and... and all kinds of stuff. We have to get them on that." She squeezes Rose's arm. "It's practically foolproof."

"Except for  _how_." Rose tips her head to the side. "I mean, it's kind of hard to just...  _randomly_ convince my father to go on some romantic ride." She bites her lip. "What about a rollercoaster. Your Mum will get all scared and lean into Dad and-"

"Mum loves rollercoasters." Bridie interjects, looking downcast.

"Even better." Rose grins. "Because Dad's scared of them." Trading equally devilish grins, they turn in time to get their fairy floss.

* * *

"I just can't believe you've never come to a carnival." Kate says again as she and Mike walk behind the girls. "Bridie and I go all the time!"

"I never even know when they're in town." Mike protests. "And... hey, you've never done putt-putt. Don't lecture me about incomplete life experiences." The girls slow and Mike rolls his eyes. "Oh my gosh, now there's a deathtrap." He stares at the rickety rollercoaster in front of him. Kate's smile widens. "No." He says simply. "No, no. Not in a million years."

Bridie turns, a wicked look in her eyes. "You two should go on it!" She looks at Mike in a pleading gaze. "Mum  _loves_ rollercoasters, Mike. And she never has anyone to go on there with her." Her eyes turn tentative. "I mean... unless... like, you're  _scared_ or something. Because that's okay. We'd understand."

Kate's grin widens. "You're not scared, are you?" She turns to Mike.

"I'm not scared!" Mike protests, a little too quickly.

Rose steps forward, resting a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay. Bridie and I are too short anyway. Maybe Kate will just go by herself if you're too nervous."

"I'm not nervous!" Mike protests again, stamping his foot just a little. "It's just..." He waves a hand at the contraption. "It... it doesn't look safe."

"It's up to code." Kate reports, her eyes scanning down the long paper on the side. "Passed all the inspections."

"I..." Mike flails for a moment, then hangs his head, turning to the attendant. "Two tickets, please."

Bridie and Rose watch them go, identical smiles on their faces. "Too easy." Rose mutters, high-fiving her best friend.

* * *

"I hate you for this, you know." Mike's knuckles are white on the handrail as the ride launches, a slow crawl around and a gentle climb. To the side, Bridie and Rose are indistinguishable from the crowd. "Why would anyone do this for fun?"

"Adrenaline?" Kate suggests, already grinning like an idiot. Catching Mike's incredulous gaze, she just shrugs. "Hey, I'm a firie for a reason, okay? I love this sort of thing." She smiles encouragingly at him. "Look, Mike... just scream."

"What?" Mike frowns.

"Scream." Kate repeats. "Don't focus on anything else. Just yell your heart out and go with it."

"I... oh shit." He looks over the edge then quickly sits back, paling.

"You didn't have to come on." Kate groans, wondering vaguely whether he's going to throw up on her.

"And let you tease me for the rest of our lives? I think not!"

Kate turns to face him. "Lives?" She frowns. It's not the actual concept that has surprised her. It's just that, coming from his mouth, the words seem much more... real.

"I..." The cart is almost at the top. "Yeah,  _lives,_ Kate. I love you."

Kate freezes. "What?"

"I... I said I love you, Kate." Mike repeats, and even though his voice wavers slightly, he sounds more certain.

"Okay." Kate hesitates. "If this is a deathbed confession or something-"

"It's not." Mike grits his teeth. "I love you. Also, I'm really scared-" They reach the top.

"Love you too." Kate says, in a rush. For a moment they look at each other, and then Kate grins. "You ready?"

"For... our lives?" Mike frowns.

"Nope." Kate grins, just as the cart plummets, Kate's laughter intermingling with Mike's screams.


	28. Chapter 28

"Just so you know, this is the most ridiculously awkward and cute thing ever." Cal muses idly from her spot cross-legged on Kate's bed, munching on a piece of celery dipped in peanut butter while Kate discards outfit after outfit. "You know, you  _have_ met the kid before. She's not going to care what you're wearing."

"Either help me pick something or shut up and eat your disgusting snack." Kate grumbles, tossing a t-shirt onto the ever-increasing pile of clothes on her desk.

"It's a trip to the shops, Kate. She's barely going to notice what you're wearing when she's in possession of her Dad's credit card. And I'll have you know peanut butter and celery is amazing."

"How are we related?" Kate mutters under her breath, huffing so heavily her fringe flies up around her face for a moment. She hates that her sister always looks totally flawless in whatever she's wearing, even when she's just rolled out of bed. "Callie, if you can find me an outfit, I'll never sneer at that monstrosity of a meal again. But everything I pick out has me looking like I'm either going to boot camp or like a total frump.  _Or_ isn't washed."

"You know there's more people here than just me who can wash, you know?" Cal folds her arms and clicks her tongue in a pointed sort of way. Realistically, Kate knows her sister is right, loathe as she is to admit it.

"But you make the clothes smell so much nicer." She half-whines.

"It's called fabric softener, a concept I  _have_ explained many times over." Cal rolls her eyes, before raising herself up slightly to scan Kate's room. "Wear the plain black t-shirt dress with my red belt and your red earrings. And flats. Shopping is a serious sport and you need appropriate footwear."

Kate laughs and tackles her sister, wrapping her in a tight bear-hug. "Thank you, Callie!"

"Oof." Cal groans, squirming out of her sister's reach. "Damn. Go jump your boyfriend instead you weirdo."

"You sure you don't want to hang out with us? You can watch the movie with Bee and Mike or come shopping?"

"Ha!" Cal lets out a dry laugh. "Hon, I'm not going to be paying HEX fees for the rest of my life so I can skip assignments galore. Shopping is just so low on my list of things to do right now. And I think I watched enough of those  _Pokemon_ episodes with Bee to have successfully filled my  _Pokemon_ related aunty-duties. I would much rather do assignments."

"And yet you're in my room eating celery and-"

"Oi!"

"A delicious snack in my room." Kate corrects primly.

Cal shakes her head sadly. "Well, I'm also an excellent procrastinator. But hey," She shrugs neatly. "You've finally found a guy you trust with your daughter after how many years? I believe there's hope for me in the end."

* * *

When Kate moves towards her daughter's room ten minutes later, it's to find Bridie already dressed in a pair of luridly patterned orange tights, a denim skirt and a t-shirt. "Well..." Kate scans Bridie's appearance. "You look cute." She turns to face the tights, poking one of the creatures on them. "Is he a Pikatchu as well?"

"He's a  _Pokemon_ as well, Mum." Bridie sighs, plucking the fabric and rolling her eyes in that patented McGregor way. "This is  _Charmander. This-"_ She waves a hand over the t-shirt sporting the yellow creature. "-is Pikatchu."

"Well..." Kate felt as though she should have gotten points for remembering  _one_ name, but lets it slide. "Are you ready to go? Or have you got more  ** _Pokemon_** accessories to sport?"

"I was ready  _ages_  ago." Bridie grins, before catching her mother's eye. "I'll be okay, Mum. Mike's been wanting to see this movie for ages and so have I. So he and I can watch it and you and Rose can go shopping and buy me lots of presents."

"Presents, huh?" Kate tips her head to the side, shuffling closer to her daughter and murmuring into her ear. "And what presents would these be?"

"If I said a  _Bulbasaur_ plushie, would you know what that meant?" Bridie grins, as they make their way to the car.

* * *

"So... what are we after today?" Kate grins, turning to the young girl walking beside her whose eyes are flicking between each shop name, mouthing each one silently. "Is there a game plan or-"

"Shopping  _is_ a serious business. Of course there's a game plan." Rose grins, much in the same way as Mike does before turning to Kate. "I hope you don't mind shopping with me? I guess you probably were keen at the chance to shop just by yourself but-"

"No, are you kidding?" Kate shakes her head profusely and drags a hand over her outfit. "I am a terrible shopper, totally reliant on either my sister or my daughter. Trust me. I'm glad I get to go shopping with you." Rose says nothing to this, but it seems to Kate as though the young girl walks just a little taller as they make their way towards Kmart. "So, are we looking for anything in particular?"

"I..." Rose fidgets with the bracelets on her arms, and as Kate glances down she sees it's a yellow and black threaded bracelet. "Well, I kind of just... wanted... some stuff that wasn't so..." She plucks at the t-shirt she's wearing and Kate turns her attention to it. Realistically, there's nothing wrong about it, but the sequined love-heart doesn't exactly seem to be Rose's style. And then, as though the words are tumbling out, she adds, "I just always go shopping with Dad, or Grandma, and it's nearly impossible to explain to them that I'm too old for stuff like socks with frills and love hearts everywhere. I just like to... to pick my own stuff. Like, I'm not saying I want... I don't know..." She makes a vague gesture across her chest. "Just something a bit more... me."

"Okay." Kate nods.

"I mean, it's not that I want to grow up too fast. I don't want... I don't know... miniskirts and  _real_ heels and all that. I just... I think I'm too old now for jeans with... flowers sewn onto them and rainbows and everything. Sometimes... sometimes I just want something a bit plainer. More... normal. But it's hard telling Dad that. And then he gets all embarrassing and calls me his  _little girl_ and..." She trails off, flushing slightly. "Well, you know how he is sometimes."

Kate barely suppresses her grin. "Yeah, I know." She agrees. "Look, Rosie, you should be able to wear whatever you want. As long as you're wearing it for you, okay? Not... not for what everyone else thinks. So you show me what you like, and we'll go from there."

Rose looks surprised, but smiles a bit wider. "Well... in here, I guess." They make their way to the 'tween' section, and Rose begins to flick through tops and pants uncertainly. Kate does the same, every now and then coming across something she thinks Rose will like and adding it to the handful of coat hangers in her hand. Once they've retrieved enough they make their way to the changing rooms and Kate waits outside as Rose enters a cubicle.

They're the only ones in the change rooms, and after a minute or so Kate calls out, "So... you're not into  _Detective Pikatchu?_ "

Rose lets out a laugh from behind the door. "No. I mean, Dad's been talking about it since before the first trailer was even out. He loves all that stuff. All that sci-fi and fantasy stuff. He got me into Harry Potter but failed when it came to Pokemon. I always used to get sad that they'd battle." Kate grins at Rose's words. "What about you?"

"I never understood it all." Kate admits, unable to stop the twinge of slight guilt that she's been unable to follow Bridie's interest with as much attentiveness as Rose has obviously tried to. "And Bridie gets annoyed explaining it to me all the time."

There's a scraping of a lock as Rose opens the change room door, holding her arms out uncertainly. "How's this?" All in all, it's not such a drastic change, but the jeans are a slimmer fit and darker, and the t-shirt slightly more of a flattering cut.

"What do you think?" Kate asks softly, not wanting to push Rose into anything.

Rose's face splits into a wide smile. "I like it." She grins.

"Well..." Kate grins, picking up her handbag. "I think we should get them then."

* * *

"So... have you had to dive into a car to rescue someone before?" Rose questions, her voice a little louder than normal to be heard over the chatter in the food court, before placing a chip into her mouth. "Have you driven the truck? Or... or caught a bad guy?"

"It's really not as dramatic as it looks on TV." Kate laughs, shaking her head softly. "Mostly it's little stuff like kitchen fires. Lots of back-burning when we were back in NSW in the mountains but for the most part it's small stuff or... or traffic accidents and stuff like that." Loathe as she is to put her profession down, she doesn't want Rose to get the wrong idea of what she does for a living.

"You delivered a baby though. What was that like?"

"A lot easier than pushing one out." Kate quips before she can stop herself, then catches Rose's eye. "It's fun. It's always something different. Challenging." Kate leans forward to take a sip of her drink. "Have you thought of what you might want to do?'

Rose shrugs, looking thoughtful. "I think sometimes maybe I'd want to be a vet. Or else a beekeeper. Run a farm, maybe? Something with animals, anyway?" She looks curiously at Kate. "Do you like animals?"

"You know, when I was in the mountains, Cal was a WIRES volunteer. So we always had injured possums or... or the odd joey. So I like animals a lot."

"Wow!" Rose grins. "Does she still do it?"

"I think she stopped when she went back to uni full time and got a part time job. But I know she wants to do it again soon."

"And... do you want more kids?" Rose tries to ask the question casually, but as she glances back at Kate before hastily avoiding her eye, Kate comes to realise the question definitely hasn't come out of the blue. Kate feels the corners of her mouth twitch.

"I... I guess that would be something I'd have to decide with... with the right person." She replies tentatively.

"And..." Rose sounds even more fake-casual. "Is my Dad the right person? Because, I know he's a bit of a dork sometimes, and... and he's sometimes  _totally_ embarrassing, but... he's pretty funny too and... I don't know, he likes you and I..." She blushes furiously. "I just wondered."

"Well..." Kate begins, smiling at Rose. "I'd say... he is a dork. But... I... I think he might... be the right person for me."

* * *

"It was awesome, Mum!" Bridie squeals as she bounces up and down on one of Mike's bar stools, grinning broadly. "The bulbasaurs were so sweet! And... and the Mr Mime was so funny! And... and-"

"Don't forget the Psyduck!" Mike interjects. "He and Pikatchu strapped into their little carseats! And Snubbull-"

"-The Magikarp-"

"-Jigglypuff-"

"-And Lickitung-"

"Oh my gosh!" Rose interjects, rolling her eyes at her friend. "You're just as big a dork as  _he_ is." She accuses. Bridie sticks out her tongue before leaning forwards.

"So! What did you buy? Show me?"

Rose looks meaningfully between Mike and Kate before scooping up her shopping bags. "Maybe in my room. Then we can... uh... listen to music?"

Bridie hesitates for a fraction of a second before her eyes widen slightly and she nods. "Oh. Yeah, okay! Sounds good!"

"Subtle, Rosie!" Mike calls as the girls nod and scurry away, shaking his head. "So, she didn't drive you mad?"

"No. It was... well, we had a great time, actually. She's... she's a very smart kid." Kate suddenly loses the battle she's been fighting since she saw Mike and finally cracks up laughing. "I'm sorry. I can not take you seriously wearing this." She reaches up and plucks the hat from Mike's head, examining it. "I mean, what are you wearing?"

"It's a Pokeball hat!" He declares defensively, taking it back and sitting it atop his head once more. "Ten seconds and you're already making fun of me. See! Knew I should've flirted with that other firie instead? Whatsisname? Dutchy?" He tuts in an overly dramatic way before he grins and closes the distance between them, kissing her. A moment later a little-too-loud music starts up, slightly muffled by the walls, and Kate pulls away.

"Little Ears are really unsubtle." She mumbles, tucking her hair behind her ears.

"Yup." Mike agrees, trailing a hand down her arm. "So... am I too broke to shout you dinner some time next week? Or has Rose actually broke the bank?"

"No, should be able to split... say, Subway?" Kate rests her head against his chest for a moment. "You've raised a good kid, Mike."

"Well, so have you." Mike agrees, and she likes that she can just settle herself in her arms and he can tuck his chin atop her head and she's  _safe._ "Bridie's an amazing kid. Smart too." He gives a soft chuckle that rumbles in Kate's ear. "But I reckon our kids have been conspiring. I wonder if you got the same talk I did today?"

"Well, what was yours?" Kate begins hesitantly.

"Well, mostly about your  _rampant_ foot fetish. And your secret love for One Direction. But  _mostly_ that time is short and we belong together, should pop some kids, all that." Although he keeps his voice casual, Kate feels his chin tilt slightly, and she knows he's seeking her out.

"Yeah, I... I got that same one." Kate concedes. "I mean, Rosie was basically telling me that you're afraid of clowns and if we go out, we can't go to any McDonalds because of an unfortunate incident involving you and a Ronald McDonald statue but... yeah. I got the same one."

"And... what do you think?" Mike murmurs.

"I think..." She sinks further into his arms. "I think I'm glad you're the right person for me." She settles on.


	29. Chapter 29

It's well past midnight when Kate arrives home, exhausted with smoke still stinging her nostrils. She's not surprised to find Cal and Bridie asleep on the lounge, the opening menu of  _Finding Nemo_ looping over and over again, a bowl empty but for a few unpopped corn kernels in front of them. As Kate mutes the TV, Cal opens her eyes blearily and waves. "Hey." She whispers, extracting herself from Bridie. Unlike the two of them, Bridie had always slept like the dead. True to form, Bridie gives an unintelligable mutter and sleeps on, while Cal leads the way to the kitchen. "You stink of smoke by the way."

"Yeah, gonna have a bath in a sec." Kate agrees, sniffing herself and wincing. "A very strong bubble bath." She flashes a smile at her sister. "So how was your night?"

"Well, Marlin found Nemo, so that's a plus." She flashes a grin. "We just watched movies for... well, ages. But hey, it's Friday night." She heads to the fridge and withdraws a glass container. "There's leftover pasta in there."

"Cheers." Kate mutters, transferring the dish to the microwave. For a moment, they stand, illuminated only by the dull orange glow of the microwave, both of them leaning against the counter top. Kate stops the appliance with a second to spare and she and Cal head mutely towards Cal's bedroom. Under the glow of the fluorescent lights, Kate stabs a fork into the dish. "Cal, I've... I've got to talk to you about something." Kate begins, transferring a mouthful of pasta into her mouth.

She's not prepared for the squeak that comes from Cal as she bounces up and down on the bed. "Oh my God, you're pregnant?!"

"What? No!" Kate splutters, burning her throat as she hastily swallows her mouthful. Cal's shoulders slump.

"Eh. Should've figured. You're bloody religious about your birth control." Kate rolls her eyes but otherwise ignores Cal's apparent eagerness for another child in the house.

"I... no. Definitely  _not_ pregnant. No, what it was is... well our lease is up in a month and-"

"And you want to move in with Mike and start making little Baby Flynn's?"

"Why are you on the baby train too?" Kate enquires, huffing so heavily her hair flutters, and hoping that Cal drops the subject.

"Well, wait? Who else is?" Cal frowns, thankfully taking the bait of the tangent and running with it.

"Well, Rose and Bridie for a start." She admits, rolling her eyes once more. "But... I just want to assess all my options."

Cal eyes twinkle in amusement. "That's not like you. You usually dive straight in. Head first. No thought whatsoever. But you,  _thinking things over_? Unheard of. Unprecedented. Unfathom-"

"You're hilarious." Kate mutters darkly, settling herself more comfortably on the pillows. "I just wanted to know if... if you'd be okay with us living with him? I mean... if. This is all... all  _if._ "

"So let me get this straight?" Cal begins, dragging a hand through the air as though outlining an invisible billboard. "You want to move in with your hot boyfriend and drag your little sister along for the ride?"

Kate scoffs. "Well I'm not just going to kick my baby sister to the curb."

"I'm almost 21, I'm hardly a baby anymore." Cal points out, heaving a heavy sigh.

"You'll always be my baby, Callie." Kate pouts childishly, moving closer to wrap an arm around Cal's shoulders.

"Look," Cal presses, holding her arms up in surrender. "A few friends from uni are renting a house and they're looking for a housemate. I was-"

"Cal, this is not me kicking you out!"

"I know." Cal assures her. "But I've been thinking about this for a week and I think I'm ready to see what I can do without... without hiding in a room all the time or... or throwing myself into studies or Bridie. I... I want to be better." She leans across and rests her hand on Kate's belly. "And I kind of want to be an Auntie again. Just sayin'-  _ow!_ " She laughs as she pulls her hand back, finally settling her head on Kate's shoulder. "Remember when she was born?"

"Vividly." Kate smiles softly. "I'd never been that scared before."

"Well, you did deliver your own baby on the side of the road. I'd say you  _get_ to be scared." She sniffs. "That kid's been in a rush her whole life. Wanted to run before she'd even learned how to walk."

Kate twists slightly and presses a kiss to the top of Cal's head. "I don't know what I'd do without you." For a moment, Kate closes her eyes and fragments of Cal growing through the years flood her mind, from the tiny baby to this beautiful woman now. "I'm so proud of you, Callie. Of everything you've done."

Cal squirms uncomfortably. "Well, it's all down to you. I mean, if you hadn't been there for me... who knows where I'd be." For a moment, both of them seem to get lost in the  _what-if_ s. Then Cal shifts, moving to wrap her pinkie finger around Kate's. "We got each other, okay? No matter where we're living. No matter where we are. It's us against the world."

* * *

The next day she makes her way to Mike's workshop, feeling more than a little nervous, but forces a smile she's not quite feeling as she opens up the door and steps inside. The smell of wood shavings and varnish linger in the air as she enters, and she realises Mike always smells like this, even though she's never really noticed. The realisation is oddly comforting.

"Hey." She greets, when Mike fails to notice her entering. He looks up from his sanding, grinning, and lowers his tools.

"Hey!" He smiles widely, moving over to her and pressing a quick kiss to her lips. "I wasn't expecting you today. I thought you were working?"

"I am." Kate agrees, feeling her heart flutter, and she inwardly curses. "I mean, later, obviously. Or soon. I'm just on my way there. But... um... I just wanted to talk to you for a bit."

"See," Mike grins. "I knew I was irresistible."

"Hmm..." Kate pauses, scrunching up her face, and this is easier, really, the teasing and the jokes. Much easier than- is she seriously standing here asking him to move in with her? "I wouldn't say  _irresistible._ More... painfully addictive. Like cocaine."

"You had a lot of experience with that, have you?" Mike flashes her a wide grin. Kate rolls her eyes. "You know you do that a lot." Mike muses.

"What? Cocaine?" Kate challenges.

"No." Mike shakes his head. "Rolling your eyes. You always seem to roll your eyes around me." He crosses his arms and pouts dramatically. "Why, a guy could get the impression the girl thinks he's ridiculous."

"Well, I don't know what would give you that impression." Kate whispers, stepping a little closer. "I mean, I kind of feel I frequently let you know how much I enjoy your company."

Mike's cheeks colour just a little and he grins goofily. "Bridie's at her grandmother's for the weekend if you wanted to stop by for a bit." He grins.

"Well, I guess that  _could_ be arranged. After all, I guess there are many other ways I could show you how much I-"

A small cough from the other side of the room makes Kate flush, and she looks up, spotting Rose with an eyebrow raised. "Yeah, she's... she's not there yet." Mike informs her much too late, and the grin on his face tells her he's enjoying this way too much.

"I hate you so much right now." Kate hisses into his ear before turning to Rose. "Hey, Rosie. Uh... what are you going to do at your Grandma's?"

"Probably a lot of therapy to forget  _this_ conversation." Rose quips, grinning at Kate's embarrassed face. "Nah, it's all good. Uh, probably just helping her out around the house and cooking and stuff. What are you guys going to do? Aside from... you know... gross sex stuff with my Dad."

Mike's cough is fairly unsuccessful at hiding his amusement. Kate elbows him. "Uh... I guess just some stuff around the house. I... I've got to look at new places actually. My... my lease is up." She hates the way her heart is pounding in her chest, and beating in her ears, and she can't help but feel ashamed that she's taken this easy way out, slipping it into conversation with his daughter of all people.

"Oh." Mike nods seriously, turning back to his sanding. "So... I guess you'll be too busy for Little Old Me, scouring real estate and the like. Just... uh... call me when you're free I guess."

Oh.  _Oh._ Kate swallows hard. "Yeah," She agrees, hoping she's more successful than she feels at injecting nonchalance into her tone. "Yeah. I guess so. Ah, listen, I've got to head to work. It was great seeing you both." And without another word, she dashes out of the shed.

* * *

Rose watches Kate go before rounding on her father, scooping up the pencil eraser from the desk and lobbing it in Mike's general direction. "Dad! You idiot!" She hisses.

"Hey!" Mike protests as the eraser hits him squarely in the back. Of course, it's not nearly big enough to have caused any real damage, but he instinctively raises a hand and rubs the area it had hit all the same, stretching in an way that puts Rose in mind of a gorilla scratching. However, the situation is too serious for her to crack a smile at this unfortunate image. "What was that for?"

"Are you seriously that oblivious?" Rose presses, taking a few steps towards him, feeling a twinge of satisfaction as he takes a few tentative steps back, lest she continue to throw things.

"What?" Mike repeats, raising his hands in surrender. "White flag, Rosie! I come in peace! What's  _wrong_?"

"She was trying to see if you wanted to move in together." Rose explains with the same tone she uses when she's tasked with explaining something complicated to her kindergarten buddy, barely suppressing another eye roll. "Seriously, Dad! You're so  _thick_ sometimes."

"What?" Mike splutters, shaking his head and glancing at the spot where Kate had disappeared from. "No she wasn't."

"She was!" Rose barely suppresses a shriek of irritation. "You're just too oblivious to notice. And now you've basically said to her ' _pfft, no, get your own place_ '"

"That's... that's seriously..." Mike bites his lip. "How did all  _that_ come of a conversation about her lease being up?"

This time, Rose  _does_ let out a frustrated cry, perching on the edge of a toolbox and glaring at him, speaking in the same tone she does when she's trying to talk her grandmother through connecting to the WiFi. "Because, you  _should_ have said ' _let's look together, because this is a decision that affects both of us_.'  _Instead,_ you basically said,  _'I don't care where you live, woman who means nothing to me beyond the physical'_."

"I..." Mike clenches his hands for a moment. "Rose, I don't understand women."

"That..." Rose declares, standing up. "...is obvious." She stares at him for a moment before rolling her eyes once more and jabbing a finger at the door. "Because otherwise you'd be running after her! Go!"

Mike pushes himself to his feet for a second, then hesitates. "Rose, I..."

"Oh, come on Dad. Bridie and I  _want_ you two to get together. Now is not the time for a deep and meaningful with me. It's the time to chase after your girlfriend and reassure her you  _do_ actually love her. Now  _go!_ "

* * *

As Mike dashes down the street he replays the conversation with Kate over and over in his head, barely suppressing an eyeroll himself. After all, how was he supposed to know what she meant? Why couldn't she have just asked?

"Kate!" He calls out as he catches sight of her retreating back several metres ahead, her shoulders hunched against the heat of the day. She permits to stop, but doesn't turn to face him. Mike moves around to get a better look of her face. "Kate? I-"

She shoulders her bag more securely on her shoulders and jabs a thumb vaguely in the direction of the firehouse. "Mike, I've got to get going and-"

"I didn't realise you were-" Mike begins, talking over Kate. He reaches out and goes to touch her arm, but she takes a step back.

"-it doesn't matter-" Kate shakes her head. "Mike, I've got to go."

"Please. I... I didn't understand what you were saying."

"My lease is up. That's all I said."

"So let's look at places together." Mike can't keep the hitch out of his voice. "I... I'm sorry. I thought... I  _wanted_ this to be a conversation. Because there's so much... so much we haven't talked about." For a moment, he sees Kate lying in that hospital bed just like Sarah had, but he shakes his head to rid it. "Your job scares me, and... and I'll always be overprotective. And we have our kids and Cal and... and there's so much we need to talk about but I want to live with you, Kate. I want us to be a family. I've just been treading lightly because... well, I didn't want to... to overwhelm you or... scare you away. And..." They both move back off the road as a car drives past. "This isn't the place we should be talking. But if you're asking me... I... I want a life with you. I'm all in, Kate. So... so let's figure it out together. I want to live with you."

Kate looks up and wrings her fingers. "I should have just said something instead of..." She hesitates. "I do have to go to work. But... can I come by after shift with Bridie? And we can... talk about everything. All together?" She sucks in a breath just as Mike exhales in relief.

"Yes." Mike agrees.


	30. Chapter 30

Kate's eyes fly open as her foot collides with someone. A moment later, conscious thought returns and she realises that she's kicked Mike in her sleep. Turning over to flash him an apologetic look, she just sees his silhouette as he shuffles. "Ouch! You bloody conduct orchestras in your sleep, you do." He grumbles. "That's like the fourth time you've kicked me."

"Sorry." Kate mumbles, unconsciously sliding a little closer to the edge of the bed to give him more space and snapping her feet together. "I'm a bit of a restless sleeper."

"A bit?" Mike challenges, and there's a scraping sound as though he's running his hand over his stubble. "I told you we should have gone to my house. At least I've got something bigger than a double bed."

"I'm sorry." Kate repeats, glancing at her clock and seeing that it's only just passed four in the morning.

"Don't apologise! I mean, it just baffles me that it was like filing myself into an envelope when I first got into this bed and now half the sheets are on the floor. Do you always flail like that?"

"I don't know." Kate huffs, tugging the sheet back over herself. It's hard not to take offense at his grumbling tone. "I don't normally ask for feedback. What about you and your snoring? Are we going to talk about that, or is it all just me?"

There's a moment silence, during which Kate is sure they are both glaring through the darkness at each other. And then Mike breaks it, in a more tentative tone than before. "Are we having a fight?"

Instantly, Kate softens. "I don't know." She scrapes a clump of hair from her face. "I just... I guess we've never really slept in the same bed before... and... just  _slept,_ you know?"

"Yeah..." Mike's silhouette shifts somewhat. She wonders whether he is just clinging on to his own side of the bed like she is.

"Do you think we're rushing into this whole moving in thing?" It's easier to ask in the darkness, easier to voice the deepest woes and not have to see the expression on his face. She doesn't think she could handle seeing him like that, full of pity or disappointment or anger.

"No." Mike answers quickly, before hesitating. "Do you?"

"No." Kate says, just as quickly. But she can't honestly say it's the truth. After all, she's done nothing but second guess herself this entire time and now… well, now it seems he's having the same doubts.

"I... I don't know." She murmurs before she can stop herself. And she hates how vulnerable she sounds. "It's just... I've never lived with a guy before, Mike. And... and there's so much we still..." She takes a deep breath. "I mean, the girls are all aboard and I guess for some that's half the battle but there's so much we haven't talked about. I mean, I'm... I'm near-broke and I'm... I'm dealing with all this shit about Maddie and... and Mike I know that I could die any day at my work and it's something I came to terms with a long time ago but... but have you?"

Mike hesitates for a moment, and all of a sudden she finds she  _needs_ to see Mike's face, even if it is flooded with all of her worst fears. Kate reaches out behind the mattress and flicks a light switch. In an instant, the fairy lights above her bed are illuminated, sending a soft white glow over the pair of them and the expanse of bedding in between. Like her, Mike is clinging to the edge of the bed.

He doesn't look surprised by her sudden need to see him. His eyes barely falter; even in the dark, he'd been staring straight into her eyes. "After the accident…" He begins, and unconsciously, Kate's fingers lift up to touch the scar on her head. "I don't think I'll ever come to terms with it." He murmurs, shifting closer to her and threading his fingers through hers. "It's your job. It's what you love doing and I'd never ever ask you to stop, but that doesn't mean that I'm..." His fingers clench, just a little. "Every time I smell smoke, I think of you trapped in a fire somewhere, hurt or alone and... and I don't know if I'll ever get over that. But... I want you to do the job you love doing. And I'd never want to make you feel like you'd have to stop."

For a moment, they lapse into thoughtful silence. Then Kate asks, "And... moving out of the house you lived in with Sarah?" She can't help but suck in a breath as she waits for his response, and she's not surprised to hear him do the same. "Mike, I'd never want to rush you into something you're not ready for."

"It'll... it'll be hard." He murmurs. "Maybe one of the hardest things I've done since I lost her. But... I think it's time?" He voices the words like a question, then swallows and corrects himself. "No. I  _know_ it's time. I know Sarah wouldn't have wanted me to wallow and... and I feel the same way. I don't want to wallow in a house of the past the rest of my life. And I don't want that for Rosie, either. And neither would Sarah."

"She sounds like an extraordinary woman." Kate murmurs.

"Yeah, she was." Mike agrees, and Kate doesn't push for more. But Mike turns to Kate and adds, "I need you to know you're not... you're not just a consolation prize or a... a distraction for me. This is real to me. I love you, Kate."

"I love you too." Kate moves into his embrace. "But… just because I need to move doesn't mean… I shouldn't have pushed you like that. I'll understand if you're not ready."

"I'm ready, Kate." Mike whispers, a hand trailing absentmindedly along her arm. "I'm all in. I want to live with you, Kate. Even if I have to wear shin-pads to bed. But..." He moves closer still, snaking an arm around her waist. "We're keeping my king bed."

* * *

"I'm telling you, it's perfect, Kate!"

Kate wedges the phone between her ear and her shoulder as she leans down to tug her pants on. "I just find it hard to believe you've found the perfect house after only a week."

"Well, the girls have already looked through it and they agree with me.  _And_ they've picked out their rooms already,  _and_ it's close enough that they won't have to change schools.  _And_ it's not too far from the fire house and-"

"And within our budget?" Kate presses. The silence on the end of the phone gives her her answer. "Mike, I told you. I want to be able to go halves." Movement in the change room catches her eye and she looks up to see 2Dads and Buffer watching her curiously. Rolling her eyes, she picks up the phone with one hand and straightens up. "Look, shift is starting. Can we talk about this when I get home?"

"Sure. Stay safe." Mike calls, hanging up. Shoving her phone into her locker, she whips around to see them still staring at her.

"What?" She challenges, holding her arms out.

" _Home_?" Buffer repeats, a curious look on his face.

" _Mike?_ " 2Dads adds, a mischievous grin splitting his features.

" _Budget_?" Charge supplies, popping up from behind a locker. "Don't tell me our reclusive Miss McGregor is getting serious with a  _boy_."

A buzzer sounds and they make their way towards the trucks. "Saved by the bell." Buffer mutters, slapping her on the back.

* * *

"From a male point of view..." Kate begins as she settles herself in the truck once more, wiping soot from her face. The fire had been a relatively small grease fire in a café kitchen, put out in no time, and they were all making their way back to the station, all tension from the initial call lost.

"Oh, here we go." Dutchy twists around in his seat so that he's looking straight at her. "Yes, I was wondering how long it would be before you  _finally_ came to me for advice. And  _yes,_ you are being ridiculous."

"You don't even know what we're talking about." Kate protests, rolling her eyes. "Geez. I go to ask you one thing…"

"Oh yes I do." Dutchy corrects. "You and Mike are finally getting your act together, but now you're being stubborn about allowing him to pay for more than half of the deposit on a house."

Kate  _just_ manages to keep her jaw from dropping. "How did you find out?"

"Overheard you whinging in the locker room." Dutchy answers frankly. "And you are completely overthinking things."

"No, I'm not." Kate argues. She makes to turn away but Dutchy reaches out and stops her.

"You're trying to keep things simple in case everything goes wrong." He interjects, and Kate freezes. As she turns back to face him he smirks, raising an eyebrow. "So am I right or am I right?" Kate  _just_ resists the urge to thump him. "Look, to the  _casual observer-_ " Kate snorts. "-it seems as though you're still planning for worst case with one foot out the door. But… the guy loves you. And he loves your kid, right?"

"Right."

"And you love him, and his kid?" Dutchy continues.

"Well… yeah."

"So... if you're intent on living this life together, then... what's the harm in him contributing..." He hesitates, waving his hand in the air, and Kate can tell he's trying to find the most diplomatic way to speak. "...funds proportional to his income while you do the same?"

Kate blinks as the truck pulls into the station once more, mulling his words over. Then she smirks. "Smooth." She concedes.

* * *

"Dad?" Mike jumps, very nearly tumbling from his desk chair as he whips around to peer at the doorway where Rose is standing. He hastily replaces the photo frame back on his study desk and turns to face his daughter, feeling oddly guilty.

"Rosie? Uh…" He clears his throat, pushing his desk chair back slightly, though still bumping into his desk. His monitor wobbles ominously. "What are you doing up so late?"

"It's only half past seven." Rose tentatively steps into the study, leaning against the bookcase. "Dad..."

He can't hide the tears prickling the corners of his eyes, can't stop the tremor in his voice. And his gaze gives him away as Rose follows it. Slowly, as though cradling a fragile baby, she picks up the photo frame and brushes a thumb across her mother's face. "I was… just remembering when we first bought this place." He moves next to her, so that he too can see the picture. "On the moving day it bucketed down and you had a terrible fever and everything that could go wrong did and… and by the end of it we were exhausted and you'd suddenly come good, giggling and running around the house and… and your Mum said that she never wanted to move again."

"Dad..." Rose begins again. "If you're not ready to sell the house-"

"No, it's… it's the opposite, actually. I am." Mike murmurs, smiling at the image of Sarah, looking exhausted, clutching the baby Rose. "But it's hard. Like I'm… saying goodbye to another part of her."

"It's not easy, Dad." Rose wraps an arm around him, resting her head against his arm. "I miss her too. And then... it feels silly to miss her because I can barely remember her. Just... flashes. Fragments and feelings. But you... you knew her."

"She was amazing, Rosie." Mike gently twists a strand of her hair around his finger. "And she loved you so much."

For a moment they both stand there, staring at the photograph. And the memory of that day seems a million miles away.

"Dad?" Rose begins again, her gaze still on the photo. "You know it's not... betraying Mum to be in love with Kate, you know?" Rose murmurs.

"I know. I know. It just..." He tears his gaze away from Sarah, turning to Rose. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Rose nods, and Mike is struck – not for the first time – by how very wise and mature she looks. "Dad, you've spent my whole life looking after me. And you've done an amazing job. But... you need someone who'll look after you." Rose squeezes him to her side for a moment. "And you forget... Bridie and I knew you and Kate were made for each other, even before you did."

Mike gives a small smile and clutches Rose to him. "You're an amazing kid, Rosie." He murmurs. "Just amazing."


	31. Chapter 31

"This one?"

"Too draughty."

"Well, what about this?"

"Too green! That garden will take us over in our sleep!"

"Well... this?"

"Too..." Kate hesitates, tipping her head as she flicks idly through the photos on display.

Mike reaches over and pokes a finger in her ribs. "Come on. What? Think of a negative! Come on!"

Kate lets out a huff so great, the loose hairs floating around her face fly upwards. "Okay.  _That_ one is okay. But I still maintain it's not perfect!"

"Hmmm..." Mike hums in a non-committal way, snaking an arm around her waist. Kate lets out a near-indistinguishable grumble, halfheartedly attempting to peel his hands away, but surrendering quickly as his lips traipse down her neck. "We should just live on a boat."

"You think  _I'm_ suited to live on a boat?" Kate scoffs, depositing the laptop blindly on the bed next to her, head tipping back slightly as he trails his lips along her collarbone. "Stop! The girls are in the lounge room."

"Watching TV." Mike points out.

"Wishful thinking." Kate mutters.

As if on cue, there's the sound of exaggerated footsteps accompanied by loud clapping, and Kate rolls her eyes as Mike pulls away as quickly as though he's been electrocuted. "You can come in!" Kate calls out; all three girls had begun announcing their arrivals into a room with as much noise as they could. Of course, there's nothing  _really_ wrong with them being in here. The door was open, they were both fully clothed (Kate tugs the hem of her shirt back down), and they'd only come in here to get away from the noise of the movie the girls were watching.

A flash of blue precedes Cal's entrance into the room; her latest hair colour. Then, completely at odds with her cautious entrance into the room, Cal takes a running leap and settles herself on the bed, squeezing in between Mike and Kate. "Sooo..." She coos sweetly. "How goes the house-hunting, kiddies?"

"About as fun as when we picked this place." Kate huffs, unphased by Cal's less-than-mature entrance. Mike, on the other hand, immediately shuffles over to give her more space.

Cal sucks in a breath and claps a supportive hand on Mike's shoulder. "Oops. You're in for it, bro. She's a  _terrible_ house-hunter."

"Am not!" Kate protests. "I just... like to be absolutely sure-"

"She looked up the building approval plans and made us review fire plans before we even set foot in the place!" Cal pokes her tongue out and Kate catches a flash of silver.

"Cal, have you gone and got another bloody piercing?" She frowns, dragging a hand over her face.

Cal's grin widens as she pushes herself to her feet. "Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies, Katie. I'm headed out." As she reaches the doorframe, she turns back. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

Kate huffs as she closes the laptop. "Come on." She murmurs, pulling herself to her feet. "Let's go watch the end of this movie."

* * *

"Still no luck finding a place, hey?" Dutchy quips as he and Kate go about their routine checks of all the equipment. "My mate's selling a place if you're interested. Not on the market yet but could get you a look in."

"Ha." Kate lets out a dry laugh, scraping a stray piece of hair behind her ears. "Alright, I'll bite. How many rooms?"

"Four with a study."

"We don't need four bedrooms." Kate shakes her head. "The girls are happy to share and-"

" _Errrr!"_  Charge enters the room, making a noise akin to a buzzer. He stops in front of Kate, holding a finger in front of her eyes. "No. You need a bedroom for each of them."

"They want to share!" Kate protests.

"Yeah, they might now, but when they hit the terrible teens, it'll be  _I hate you_ from dawn 'til dusk. Kids need their own space. Especially women." He gives a significant nod. "Trust me."

Kate is a little too concerned to argue back with him, and although she would never admit it aloud, she has to concede he might just have a point.

"Plus!" 2Dads chimes in, also appearing and throwing himself straight into the conversation. "What happens when the Kid-Kates and Mini-Mikes start arriving?"

Kate closes her eyes for a moment, turning her head skyward for a brief moment of piece before returning back to earth. "Who... who says I'm having more kids anyway?"

"Because you're in  _luuuurve!"_ Dutchy quips, dodging her punch easily as he jogs backwards, laughing. "Trust me! This house just  _screams_ you."

"I'm sure it-" Kate stops, catching sight of the lone figure outside the shed. Dropping the gloves she is holding, she freezes. "I'll be back." She mutters. And ignoring the curious looks following her, she makes her way towards it.

Savannah has lost weight since the last time Kate had seen her, alarming in itself as she was always quite slim to begin with. Her hair has none of its previous shine, none of the bounce and health it had once held. And her nails are bitten down to the cuticles. "Sav?" She doesn't quite know why she voices it as a question. After all, she'd know her face anywhere.

Savannah fidgets nervously, twisting her hands around and around. "Is there... is there somewhere we can talk?"

* * *

"Claire's just shut herself off from everything... since..." Savannah swallows awkwardly, hands cupping the as-yet-untouched mug of coffee in front of her. The break room was empty but for the two of them; everyone else was out cleaning and prepping still. "She's dropped out of school and... and she's barely eating and she's up at all hours. She's barely speaking. I just..." Savannah rakes a hand through her hair. "I don't know what to do to help her." She looks up at Kate. "I didn't want to burden you with this. I... but I just don't know who else to turn to."

"Is she in counselling?" Kate asks softly. "Sometimes another person to speak to... outside of it all... it can really help."

Savannah shakes her head. "No, she's refusing to go. She barely even leaves the flat." Savannah's voice cracks and she clears her throat drily, taking a sip of the coffee and barely supressing a shudder. "She doesn't want to stay at... at the house after everything that happened. I'm just in a flat with a few uni mates and... and she's just staying on the lounge at the moment." Sav's shoulders droop. "Not exactly the best environment I can offer my little sister. The girls I'm staying with are cool with her being there though. That's good at least." She sighs again. "I mean, half the time she slides into my bed in the middle of the night. I think she's having nightmares or something. But she won't say..." She trails off once more.

"I know some will do house calls." Kate suggests. "Maybe if she was in an environment she felt safe-"

"I thought..." The words tumble from Sav's mouth in a rush. Her fingers snag on a knot. "I don't know what I thought. I just... I can't get over  _how._   _How_ could he do something so... so evil? How could he live with himself? How could he lie to us all. And... and why just  _her._ I mean, I just wish it was me. I can't stand the thought that my little sister is suffering with this and... and I'd do anything to protect her and I just... I don't  _know._ I don't know how I can help her get through this."

"I think..." Kate begins. "Most days, the only reason I  _did_ get through was that I had to. I... I had to eat because of the baby. I had to sleep because of the baby. And then... when I got Cal out I had to be there for her too."

"He..." Sav's voice cracks. "With Cal... he never-"

"No." Kate closes her eyes and says a swift  _thanks_ to the universe for this fact. "No. He never touched her."

"Good." Sav nods solemnly. "Look, the reason I'm here is... I guess I was wondering if you'd be willing to... to try to talk to her?"

Kate hesitates. "Sav, I'm not a therapist. I'm not trained in psychology or any-"

"But you've been there." Savannah tightens her grip on the mug. "All Claire can tell me is that I don't understand and... and maybe I don't but  _you do._ Please, Kate."

And after a moment, Kate nods. "Shit. Yeah, of course I will, Sav."

For a moment, Savannah says nothing. And it looks as though she's lived a hundred years of misery as she sits, shoulders hunched and hands shaking. Then she says, so quietly Kate almost misses it, "I feel so guilty."

"None of this is your fault."

"I... I know he's done terrible things. I know what he did was... unforgivable. And I want to tear him apart for what he did to you and to Claire. But..."

"He's your Dad." Kate murmurs softly.

A tear splashes from Savannah, landing almost in the centre of the coffee mug. "He taught me how to ride a bike and... and how to swim. He would sit through all of those awful plays I did in high school and he... he was our  _Dad._ And part of me just..." She falls silent, shaking her head. Then, giving an apologetic sort of laugh, she hastily wipes her eyes. "I'm sorry. You're the last person that wants to hear-"

"He taught me how to drive." Kate interrupts. "Once I accidentally hit a pole trying to park. He just laughed and said it was only a car. That he trusted me." Kate turns to face Savannah. "You're allowed to be sad, Sav."

"I just never thought it was possible to hate and love someone at the same time."

"Neither did I." Kate agrees softly. And in that moment, Kate is sure that they both understood each other perfectly. And then, the moment is shattered as a voice interrupts.

"Ah, Kate?" Both women look up as 2Dads enters, looking slightly unsure. "Sorry. But we need you back."

"Sorry." Savannah pushes herself to her feet and swipes at her tears once more. "I'd better get going. Thanks for everything."

"Sav, you're welcome any time. Claire too, okay?"

Sav nods and makes her way towards the door for a moment, before turning back. "If it's alright with you, I'd... I'd like to meet Bridie. Properly. Get to know her. I mean..."

"Yeah." Kate nods. "I'd like that too."

* * *

"She wants to meet  _me_?" Bridie repeats, one finger fiddling with a hole in her doona while the other squeezes Kate's hand a little tighter.

"Yes." Kate nods. "If you want to."

Bridie nods solemnly, looking so completely beyond her years with wisdom. "But not the other one? The... Claire.  _She_  doesn't want to meet me?"

"Claire..." Kate hesitates for a moment, searching for the right words. "Look, Claire is struggling a bit. She's not ready to meet you yet. And... and she might never be ready."

Bridie nods once more. "Will she be okay?" She voices tentatively.

"I hope so." Kate murmurs. She knows she was one of the lucky ones. She had Bridie and Cal, already luckier than most. Kate moves slightly and wraps an arm around her daughter. "I hope so, Bridie."


	32. Chapter 32

Kate and Bridie both remain motionless, even though the car has long since been parked, and Kate wonders if, like her, Bridie had been taken aback at their car trip already being over. After all, they'd seemed to arrive in no time flat and now they were both froze, Bridie's hands clutching at her seatbelt as though prepared to fight anyone that tries to remove it, and Kate, knuckles white against the steering wheel.

But it's Bridie to break the silence. Always Bridie, so much braver than Kate, and even though her voice is wobbly she keeps going. "It'll be okay, Mum." She murmurs, and it's this - the bizarre role-reversal that snaps Kate into action.

"I know you've said you want to meet her, but if you've changed your mind," Bridie makes to open her mouth, but Kate ploughs on, "or you find when we're in there that you've changed your mind, then we can leave, okay? You only do this if it's what you want."

Bridie nods solemnly, and Kate spies a pair of bumblebee earrings in her ears that she realises must be a loan from Rose. Bridie's finger touches each one of them as if they are a talisman.

"And... and Claire? She... she's not..." Bridie trails off again, fidgeting with a hole in the upholstery of the car seat.

"I don't know, Bee. Sav was going to talk to her." Kate sucks in a breath as she turns towards the building, and it's odd, really, how imposing a building can be, even in the bright sunshine of Cairns. "I never imagined I'd be doing this." She admits before she can really think about it. She can feel Bridie's gaze on her and she digs her nails into her thighs because she has to be the strong one here. "I always thought... well, that this was... a part of my life I'd closed. I never imagined..." She trails off once more. A second later, Bridie's hand reaches over and rests itself on Kate's, and in spite of her nerves Kate stops digging her nails into her leg.

"You did what you had to." Bridie murmurs. "And now, I've got to do what I have to."

"You don't have to do this." Kate hastens to assure her. "This was never something that you should feel you have to-"

"I have to do it for me." And despite the slight shaking of her hands and the slightly-quieter-than-normal voice, Kate has never seen Bridie's eyes so determined. "It's something I have to do, Mum."

Kate can't cry. Won't cry. Has to be strong. And so she nods and grips her daughter's hand a little tighter. "Then we'll do it together."

* * *

There is no tearful greeting, no instant connection. The girl - woman, Bridie supposes - sitting in front of her is not in a million years anything that Bridie would have imagined to be a sister.

For the most part, Bridie sits and observes as her mother and Savannah talk, all the while peering at Sav and trying to detect any similarities between them. But everything about Savannah seems at odds with Bridie. Sav's hair is sleek and shiny while Bridie's is a curly mess. She drinks green tea while the mere thought of it turns Bridie's stomach. She nibbles daintily while Bridie usually eats with gusto. And it's not just that. When they get past the awkward introductions and Sav fills them both in on her life, it's clear she's smart, concise and confident in a way Bridie doesn't ever feel she'll be.

No. All in all, Bridie feels she might just have more in common with Mike Flynn than she does with this woman who is supposedly her half-sister.

Bridie knows if she was as romantic and poetic as Rose, she'd be able to wax lyrical to herself about making your own family, or about how blood is not always thicker than water. But she can't deny the small pang of loss.

And it's not as though she's really starved for company. Sure, she'd always dreamt of siblings when she was younger, but she'd always had her Mum and Cal, plus the family that always surrounds a firehouse. And now that Rose and Mike were in their lives she was happier than ever. But even so, it doesn't mean she hadn't hoped for something... something more.

"Bridie?" Kate's voice breaks through her thoughts and she jumps so much she very nearly knocks over her drink. "Are you okay?"

"I... uh..." She tenses, then forces a smile, turning to Sav. "Uh, can I please use your bathroom?"

* * *

Kate watches her daughter disappear from view and almost has to restrain herself from following. Her fingernails once more find her thighs and she relishes in the pain of it, because it keeps her grounded. Biting her lip, Kate turns back to Sav, and is taken aback to see tears swimming in her eyes.

"None of this should have happened." She murmurs, more to herself than Kate. And in spite of the vagueness of her words, Kate knows exactly what she means. "What he did was... was evil. Pure evil."

"But if he didn't, then I wouldn't have her." Kate turns her gaze towards the spot where Bridie has disappeared. "And I'd never wish her away."

"So I'm supposed to be sad that he didn't get my sister pregnant too?" Sav snaps back. Kate blinks, and a moment later Sav deflates. "Sorry." She mutters, dragging a hand through her hair. "I just... seeing her. It's... it's made it all so much more real."

"We can leave if that's what you need." Kate makes to stand. "If it's too much for you having us here."

"That's not what I meant." Sav turns her gaze towards the hallway where, Kate knows, Claire is closeted in one of the rooms. "How do I help her Kate?"

* * *

Bridie washes her hands and looks up, peering at herself in the mirror. Once more, she finds herself taking in her reflection, trying to connect her features to her mother and aunt. She traces a finger down her nose, her cheeks. She fingers her ears, her hair, examines the shape of her eyebrows and her knobbly elbows. Everything that she is, this collection of cells and DNA seems to suddenly be in question, and she finds herself wondering what her mother sees when she looks at her. Does she see herself, or does she see the face of the man that must surely haunt her memories.

The door is pushed open and Bridie jumps, spinning around so suddenly that she knocks a jar of handcream to the ground. "Crap! Sorry!" She mutters, stooping to pick it up. "I was just-" She freezes, because the face of the girl in front of her isn't that of Savannah or her mother. Claire is nothing like her sister, half-hidden behind dark hair and an oversized hoodie, and Bridie takes a step back. "Claire?"

Claire's hands reach out to grip the basin, staring at her fingers. "I didn't realise anyone else was in here. You didn't lock the door."

"Oh." Bridie takes a step back. "Sorry."

"You're... you're  _her_  aren't you?" She spits the words like poison, and Bridie takes another step back. " _His_ daughter?"

"He'll never be my father." Bridie's words escape her before she can stop them, and she's surprised at the venom in her tone. For a moment she and Claire simply look at each other, then Bridie gestures towards the door. "I'll leave you. Sorry to... you know... exist." She's unable to keep the bite from her tone as she makes towards the door, but before she's made it two steps, there's a sob, and Claire's black locks have whipped past her and out of sight.

* * *

Bridie leans against the wall in the bedroom, her eyes scanning the single bed pushed up against the opposite wall, and the nest of blankets and pillows beside it that Claire has sunk back into, still shuddering and shaking. The blinds are drawn, and the lack of light makes it difficult for her to discern whether Claire has reacted at Bridie following her.

She wonders whether she should just go back to get Savannah, or her own Mum. Anyone would be better at trying to speak to her, and yet there's some sort of pull she can't quite put into words that spurs her closer. Bridie stops at the pile of Manchester and tentatively kneels down. "Claire?" She murmurs. "It's... it's Bridie. Do... do you want me to get Savannah? Or... or my Mum? I..." She throws another look at the door, but no one else has come to rescue her. Edging slightly closer, Bridie rests a hand on Claire's shoulder, realising all too soon that this is a mistake.

"I don't need anything from you!" Claire snaps, and although her voice is muffled by the bedding, it does nothing to distinguish the anger.

Bridie swallows and withdraws the hand. "I... I want to help, Claire. I... I can-"

She doesn't even see it coming. One minute she is kneeling beside Claire. The next she is knocked flat on her back as a hand pushes her backwards, and she's faced with Claire's furious face. "You're a mistake! Don't you see that? You're worse than that! You're evil! Disgusting! And-"

"Claire!" A clatter of footsteps and several moments of confusion as people move all around her. "Claire, get off her!" The next thing Bridie knows is her Mum dragging her backwards, pulling her back into the hallway.

"Are you okay? Did she hurt you?" Kate turns Bridie's face to look into her eyes. "Bee, what happened?"

"I..." Bridie turns towards the door but catches only a glimpse as Savannah closes it behind her, disappearing from view.

"Come on." Kate mutters, tugging her by the hand back towards the lounge room. "Come  _on."_ She repeats, as Bridie hovers, looking back. Kate's hand is shaking, her voice quivering with fear. It isn't until they are standing on the front step outside that Kate wraps her in a tight hug, tears splashing into her hair. "I'm sorry, Bee." Bridie says nothing, still ridiculously numb. Taking in another shaky breath, Kate straightens up. "We... we need to go."

* * *

**_I'm so sorry, Kate. She's still getting overwhelmed, and seeing B was probably too much today. She's sleeping now. Thanks for making the effort. - S_ **

Kate pockets the phone without replying, her hands still shaking and barely comprehending anything else that is happening around her. A moment later a hand touches her and she flinches, very nearly spilling her coffee down her. "Shit." Mike mutters, taking a step back and holding his hands up as though she is brandishing a gun. "Sorry. Kate... I was just..."

She deposits her coffee none-too-gently upon the coffee table, liquid sploshing from the mug and settling upon the glassy surface. But she doesn't care. Can't bring herself to think about anything other than her daughter down the hall. "She got hurt."

"Bridie?" Mike frowns, kneeling in front of her and tucking a finger underneath her chin so that she looks more directly at him. "Kate, what-"

"Claire attacked Bridie. She said... awful things. And Bridie..." She sucks in a breath, eyes shut tight against the memories of the day. "I don't want her thinking that it's true."

"Bridie or Claire?" Mike questions. Kate twitches as though trying to shake off an irksome fly, not quite able to deduce just which one she feels more pity for, or which girl she feels more worry for. "Kate, Bridie knows you love her. Hell, I think it's the first thing she  _ever_ learned. And the words of someone who is..." Kate jerks her head up, ready to defend Claire against some slight upon her character. "Well, the word of someone who is suffering just as much as you did with nothing good to drag her from the darkness. You... you  _had_ to deal because of Bridie. But she... she's stuck."

"I can't help her." Kate murmurs. "I have no idea how I can help her."

"Sometimes..." Mike moves forwards and this time she permits him to hold her. "Sometimes Kate, all you can do is be someone who helps pick up the pieces."


	33. Chapter 33

He pulls at the front door without even waiting for an answer, even though he knows that if Kate is as bad as Cal has said, him entering her home without permission will just be another piece of ammo for her to fire at him. He's scared, has been working on autopilot ever since the call, dashing over still in his pyjama shirt to ask his neighbour to keep an ear out for Rose before speeding off.

Cal doesn't seem surprised to see him run in. On the contrary, she simply raises a shaking hand. "She's in there." Cal jabs a finger at Kate's closed bedroom door. "She's locked me out. She won't even talk to me, Mike." She rakes a hand over her hair and sinks lower into her armchair. "It's this thing with Sav and Claire. I should have gone with them. It's really freaked her out and... and I don't know what to do. I've never seen her this frantic."

"I shouldn't have left." Mike mutters, more to himself than to Cal as he mentally kicks himself. "I knew she was freaking out."

"It's not your fault. She... she panics sometimes. And hides. But... it's never been like this." Cal's eyes look different without the usual eyeliner around them, and he can tell that she's been crying. "I shouldn't have picked a fight with her. It's just... sometimes that works best. Making her angry..." She picks at a mosquito bite on her arm. "I've never seen her that mad."

"Cal... it'll..." He trails off, because he can't promise that everything is going to be okay. It's only striking him now how  _young_ Cal is, beneath the bravado and the make-up and the auntie status. Just a kid, way out of her depth. And he can't comfort her, even though Cal is looking at him as though begging for a solution. "I'll try and talk to her." He mutters, pulling himself to his feet and moving to Kate's door. For a moment he stares at the hard wood, brushing a hand against it as unwanted thoughts flood through his mind. What if he can't convince her otherwise? What if he loses her for good?

His knock is louder than intended, driven by fear and frustration, and it echoes throughout the otherwise quiet house. "K... Kate, it's me." He calls out. "I... can we talk?" He'd never fought with Sarah like this, never had her shut him out. The next moment, he wishes he could stop comparing the two. "Kate... please. Please, let me in. I..."

He doesn't expect the lock to click, but it does. A moment later the door is pulled open and, quick as a flash, Kate has dragged him in and relocked the door, shutting Cal out. "Don't want  _her_ in here." She mutters, and in the brief flash of light from the hallway, he sees that her cheeks are damp with tears, although a moment later they're plunged into darkness once more.

"Kate, what's going on?" He begins. A moment later, Kate's fairy lights turn on and he can see her, standing by the bed. She doesn't look at him. Instead, she seems to busy herself with the chain of her necklace. "Kate, Cal said you wanted a transfer. You can't leave. It won't achieve anything. And I promise, we'll keep Bridie safe."

He's sure that she's only pretending to fiddle with her necklace so that he won't see her wiping her face. But her continued silence is scaring him far more than her anger. Because he knows that bad things hide in silence, secrets are hidden, and he...

"Kate,  _please_ talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about." She mutters, still not looking at him. "It's done, Mike. I've made my decision."

For a moment, he just stands and gapes. Then he takes a step closer to her. "So that's it, is it? We're done and... and you're leaving town and you didn't even bother to talk to me?"

"I don't need to ask your permission for me to look after my own kid." Her words don't even sound like her, laced with a coldness he's never heard before.

"Can you at least  _look_ _at me_!" He snaps, taking hold of her arm and spinning her around. Her face is cool and impassive once more, and anger bubbles to the surface. "All we talked about? Buying a place together and being a family? That's all over, is it?"

For a moment, there's  _something._ Something in her eyes that has has him convinced she'll take everything back. But a second later it's gone. "I'm sorry." She murmurs. "Really, I am. But Bridie is my only concern right now."

"You-" He resists the urge to kick her dressing table, but only just. "This isn't  _you,_ Kate!"

"Maybe you just never really knew me, Mike." She hisses back. "Because this  _is_ me." She shakes her head and turns her back to him. "Look, I don't want to talk about this now. My mind is made up, and-"

"And what am I supposed to tell Rose?" He spits. "What are you going to tell Bridie?"

"I'm not Rose's mother." She murmurs, still not looking at him. "She'll... she'll be fine."

"And me?" He feels his voice shake. "Did you ever love me, or was this all some sick game?" He's so sick of the way she's keeping her back to him. "Can you please just freaking  _look at me_?"

"I never wanted to get into this!" Kate whirls around, hair flicking in front of her face. She pushes it away with an angry swipe of the hand, glaring at him. " _You_  chased  _me_ , Mike! You were the one who kept at me to have a relationship! I never wanted this!"

He has to bite his tongue to stop himself from saying the thing that flashes into his mind, the adjectives he longs to throw at her. Instead, he moves closer, and as she steps to the side, they begin to circle each other like feeding sharks. "Oh, so this is my fault?" Mike challenges.

"I didn't say that!" She cries out, raking a hand through her hair. "But I just can't... I can't do this right now, Mike! I can't deal with you on top of everything else. I have to think about Bridie!"

He shakes his head, unable to believe that this is the way the conversation has gone in less than sixty seconds. "I can't talk to you when you're like this! Coming here was a mistake!" He hisses.

"Then go!" She jabs a hand at the door. "I'm not keeping you here. Leave and don't come back!"

"Fine!" Mike snaps. He stalks to the door and wrenches it open, but at the last moment, he turns and looks back to Kate. And he's not sure whether he wants her to keep the argument going so that he can yell some more, or whether he wants her to beg him to stay.  _Say something,_ he mentally pleads.  _Anything._

But there's nothing.

She doesn't even look like the woman he fell in love with. And as he closes the door, he hears her lock it once more behind him.

Cal pushes herself to her feet as she spots Mike. "Well?" She prompts, as though she hadn't just heard everything they'd shouted at each other.

"She... I think..." He glances back at the door again, wondering if Kate is even remotely upset behind it. Or is she that strange version of Kate he'd just... "We just broke up."

"What?!" Cal splutters. "Mike, I..."

"I need to check on Rosie." He mutters, feeling dazed beyond belief. More than anything, he needs to get out of this house, away from whatever had just happened. "I... I'm sorry, Cal."

"But-" Cal begins, but he's already at the front door.

* * *

"But what  _happened_?" Bridie demands yet again, ignoring the plate of toast Cal had just deposited in front of her in favour of trying to catch her mother's eye. "I thought everything was good." Bridie looks even younger this morning, eyes wide and fearful as she glances between Kate and Cal.

"I told you." Kate sips at her coffee, avoiding both Cal and Bridie's gazes, and there's a detached sort of coolness to Kate's voice that seems so out of place. "We had an argument and we ended things. And I don't want to speak about it."

From her spot on the other side of the kitchen bench, Cal stirs her tea, even though she's sure the sugar granules at the bottom have long since dissolved. She can feel Bridie's eyes on her own, pleading with her to do something, provide more information or, better yet, talk Kate around. But Kate had made it clear that Cal was not forgiven in the slightest, and Cal feels as though she's standing in front of a cannon, waiting for the blast. Instead, she murmurs, "Bridie, if you get ready for school, I can drive-"

"No, we're going to take the day off." Kate interjects. "Spend some time together before my shift this afternoon. Then when you're done with class you can pick her up at the fire station."

"But-" Cal begins. It was so unlike Kate to insist Bridie skip school.

"You have Uni to worry about anyway." Kate continues coolly, pushing herself to her feet. "So, Bridie, get dressed and then you and I will hit the road. I'm going to brush my teeth." She stalks towards the bathroom without a backwards glance.

Bridie turns to Cal, looking uncertainly at her aunt. "She's not okay, is she?"

"Not in the slightest, no." Cal agrees, fiddling with her lip piercing. "I don't know what to do, hon."

"I wanted to see Rose and ask her what Mike said." Bridie continues, glancing at her school bag leaning against the lounge.

"I'll drive you to school if you want." Cal lowers her voice, but Bridie shakes her head.

"No. She's already mad at you. It'll only make things worse." Cal shrugs but knows that Bridie is right. "No, I'll stay with her today and maybe try to talk her around. I mean, she can't keep me away from school forever."

"Bee..." Cal begins tentatively. She's not sure if she wants to tell Bridie about Kate's determination to move, but a moment later Kate returns to the room and the chance is taken away from her.

"Come on." Kate flashes a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes. "The day is young. Let's go."

* * *

Bridie finds it hard not to drag her feet as she walks into the firehouse that afternoon alongside her mother. They're carrying at least a dozen shopping bags between them, and Bridie is quite surprised that her mother's credit card hasn't burst into flame from overuse. For her part, Kate hadn't seemed to notice that her daughter wasn't as involved in the spontaneous shopping day as she herself was, too intent on insisting upon buying Bridie purchase after purchase. Worse still, she'd dropped the news. They were moving.

Bridie is exhausted. She has the beginnings of a sugar headache pounding in her head after her mother insisted that they have an ice-cream, a juice  _and_ a milkshake each, not to mention the enormous lunch, and all she wanted to do was sleep. "There's some lollies and chocolate in my locker." Kate jabbers as she leads Bridie into the break room and deposits the bags on a table in the corner. "Or I could make you a smoothie. I'm sure Buffer stocked the kitchen with lots of fruit. Or-"

"No, no more food,  _please._ " Bridie whines, flopping into one of the armchairs and turning to face her mother. "Mum, just call him."

Kate averts her gaze, like she has done every other time Mike has been mentioned that day. "I'm going to have to go on duty in a sec and might get called away. But Cal is going to come and pick you up in an hour or so. Um... there's books and the TV and... and I think 2Dads left his XBox-"

"Mum-"

"So I need to go get changed and-"

" _Mum!_ " Bridie snaps. "This is crazy! You love him and he loves you and-"

"I've told you I am  _not_ having this conversation with you!" Kate slams a fist on the table, making Bridie jump. "It's over, Bridie. And I don't want to hear anything else about him. Now if you're done being a child, I need to get to work."

Bridie rolls her eyes and crosses her arms. "Excuse me for thinking this time would be different." She can't keep the bitterness from her words.

"This time  _what_?" Kate clicks her tongue impatiently. They never really argued much, unless her Mum got like this... so wound up she forgot everything else.

And Bridie is beyond angry. She's tired, she's scared and all she wants to do is yell and rage. So she pulls herself up to her fullest height and jabs a finger in Kate's direction. "That this time we wouldn't have to leave again." Bridie hisses back. "But it's fine. You bought me a few dresses, I guess. So I should forget about Mike and Rose and this school and this whole bloody town." She turns her head darkly. "It's the way it's always been with you."

Kate feels tears prick the corners of her eyes. "Bee, I-"

"McGregor!" Marshall's voice snaps from the doorway. "Shift's started. Get moving."

For a moment, Kate tries to catch Bridie's gaze, but the young girl won't cooperate. "I'm sorry, Bee." She whispers, before she leaves the room to get changed.

* * *

Sitting in the back of the truck, Kate doesn't think she's ever felt more guilty than she does now. She'd hated moving as a child. Hated each new town, hated the introductions, hated  _everything_ about it. And now... well, now, she was doing the exact same thing to her own daughter. Kate runs a hand through her hair and secures it with an elastic, barely resisting the urge to start tugging at it and screaming. She was no better than her own mother, running away.

But something in Claire had scared her. Claire isn't well, and Kate feels as though she's stuck between a rock and a hard place. Because she'll never forgive herself if Claire hurts Bridie.

"So I talked to my mate." Dutchy leans across to be better heard over the roaring of the siren, and Kate leans in, grateful for the distraction.

"About?" Kate frowns.

Dutchy looks puzzled. "About the house?" He supplies, then hastens to add, "Look, I know you said you really didn't think it was the right fit for you and Mike and the kids, but... just give it a chance. I really think you'll like it."

"Oh." Kate fidgets with her boots. "Look, that's kind of on hold at the moment." She forces a smile she's not quite feeling and turns to face Buffer, effectively cutting of Dutchy's words. "What's the situation?"

She ignores Dutchy's confused gaze and focuses instead on Buffer's words as he briefs them. "Car went forwards instead of backwards at a local rec centre. Small engine fire but we need to make sure the building is stable."

"Should be an easy one, then." 2Dads muses. Almost immediately, several cries are heard throughout the truck. "What?" 2Dads frowns.

"Mate..." Charge leans back in his chair. "You've just single-handedly guaranteed us the most hectic shift imaginable." He clucks.

* * *

By the time they arrive, Nikki and Chris are already checking over the driver, who was all the while swearing that he'd thought the car had been in drive, Kate and Dutchy head over to investigate the car. The engine is still smoking slightly, but the fire has long been put out. Thankfully, the car hadn't hit the main building, only the shed where the pool floats and lane ropes had been stored, and Kate sets about inspecting the building. "Bloody lucky he hadn't been parked anywhere else." Dutchy muses, kicking a tyre with a boot. "He either would have ended up in the pool or in the reception hall." Kate nods, her eyes itching from the chlorine in the air. She's never really been a fan of public pools, even when she was younger. She'd always preferred the beach. "Lucky there wasn't as many people around." Dutchy adds.

"Yeah." Kate agrees, glancing around. "Although..." She hesitates, looking up and down. There were certainly enough cars in the car park. It was, after all, a warm afternoon, and despite it being a school day, there were normally more people about. Kate turns to face the two patrol cops that had called the accident in. "Has the centre been evacuated?"

"We sent the other team in." He glances at his watch. "They should - should have been out by now." His words are interrupted by a cough.

"What are you thinking?" Dutchy frowns, as Kate takes a step closer to the pool shed. "Kate?"

Behind her, Nikki coughs. Kate turns to face her. Then her eyes widen. "Everybody get back!" She shouts. "Move, now!"

"What? What's going on?" Dutchy demands.

Covering her mouth with her wrist, Kate runs right up to the chain link fence and her heart drops. "Chlorine." She mutters, catching sight of the drums in the shed. "Chlorine gas is leaking everywhere."


	34. Chapter 34

"We need to get everyone back." Kate demands of the patrol cop, heart hammering in her chest. The cop, for his part, looks as though this could very well be his first week on the job, but Kate has no time to baby him. She's just noticed the way that the air is shimmering and the smell in the air that's getting stronger with every breath. "Don't get any closer to the shed though. Chris!" She whirls around to face the ambulance, where Nikki is still coughing, as though trying to clear her throat. "Get Nik on oxygen and get that rig away from here. Buff!" She turns to face Buffer, who is looking taken aback at her sudden orders. "We need to get in there. Get HAZMAT on their way but if there are people inside they don't have that long. We need to get them out."

"Gear up!" Buffer commands, and they all rush for their oxygen tanks, while Kate mentally catalogues everything she's ever read about chlorine gas. She knows that, in small doses, the worst that can happen is simply a bit of a throat tickle and sore eyes, but if the concentration is higher... "Any sign of danger, we get out. You hear me?" Buffer presses.

Kate nods. "We're gonna need more ambos too. And someone needs to check Chris and Nikki and those other cops. Make sure they're not exposed too heavily." She tugs her mask over her head and adjusts the tank. "Lets go."

* * *

It's eerie inside. Music is still playing, that standard summer mix that every single public pool seems to have on a loop. It's the type of music that should have laughter over the top, splashes and the noise of conversation. Not silence, and the light splashing of the water lapping along the edge of the baby pool.

They split up, Kate following Dutchy as usual. They always employ the buddy system, and today is no exception. And then, up front, Dutchy gestures, and Kate sees them. A lifeguard and a teenager, slumped over.

She springs into action. They're coughing, which at least means that they're still breathing, although for how much longer she's not sure. Hoisting the man to his feet, Dutchy gestures for her to take the teen, and she pulls them to their feet as they make their way to the exit.

* * *

"Hell... of a call." Nikki coughs slightly as she sits on the back step of the ambulance, an oxygen mask held loosely in her hand. She looks tired but otherwise seems okay, although she's still coughing every now and then.

"Will you just keep the bloody thing on?!" ET demands, pressing the mask to her mouth once more. She rolls her eyes, but takes the oxygen all the same. "Hell of a call." He echoes a moment later, and the corners of Nikki's mouth twitch. HAZMAT have arrived and taken over, and the victims from inside have all been carted off to the nearest hospital for treatment. "If you hadn't have realised..." His gaze flickers to Nikki and then back to the building, far at the end of the road now. "Well, it was good work."

"Owe... you a beer." Nikki manages, before rolling her eyes once more as ET flashes her an irritated look. A moment later she presses the mask back again and settles herself more comfortably where she's sitting. ET moves to sit next to Nikki, raising an arm and wrapping it around her, and she leans into his touch and closes her eyes, looking perfectly at peace.

Kate smiles, but the sight of Nikki and ET, so obviously in love, is making her ache. She pushes herself to her feet and heads back to the truck to scoop up her water. Charge moves next to her, leaning against the truck. "So, ET reckons this near-death experience calls for drinks at the pub tonight. Oh, and the boss called. Cal just took Bridie home. So," He adopts an awkward sort of dance. "no excuses this time! You saved a lot of lives today. This calls for a night out. Come on! Say yes!"

* * *

So that is how Kate finds herself sandwiched between Dutchy and Spider in a ridiculously noisy pub, wearing a top she hopes no one from Bridie's school  _ever_ sees her in and heels that send her  _somewhere_ in a normal height range. The music is loud, but the conversation and laughter from the station are louder, and despite her hesitancy, the teams' enthusiasm is infectious.

"Guava mojo!" Charge declares, returning from the direction of the bar carrying a plate of drinks to the table, and the rest of the station echo the words, throwing their hands up in the air as though the words are a war cry. 2Dads doesn't even wait for Charge to set the plate down, plucking one from the middle and taking a few measured gulps. "Oi!" Charge chastises, but 2Dads simply grins before moving off to dance with a group of women.

"What's in it?" Kate frowns as she accepts the drink from Charge. She has to lean in almost to Dutchy's ear to be heard over the pounding music.

"Guava Mojito, basically." Dutchy explains, leaning across too. "They're good. But dangerous." He takes a sip of his own and lets out a booming laugh as he seems to recall something, gesturing in RO's direction. "Had Robert arrested for property damage."

"That was a gross misunderstanding!" Robert shouts back, looking irritated at Dutchy spilling the story, before opening his mouth, perhaps to fill her in on every mitigating factor, but a distraction appears in the form of Nikki and ET.

"Hey!" Nikki squeals, folding herself into the small gap between Kate and Dutchy before wrapping an arm around each of them. "So, what'd I miss, my lovelies?" She calls out.

"Aren't you supposed to be in hospital?" Chris shifts to the very edge of his seat to be heard by her, frowning at ET.

"Hey, it's not his fault. I got the all clear!" She raises a hand in victory, before the hem of her dress further down her thighs. "I am  _alive,_ thanks to this lovely lady, and I am very ready to party!" She grins at Kate, a truly wicked glint in her eyes. "And I have just the thank you drink for you!"

* * *

Four hours later and Kate finds herself staggering down the street, arm in arm with Nikki. Both of them are spectacularly drunk and leading the way along the road, and she's  _pretty sure_ the guys were following, because they were all going... somewhere.

" _So you got the braaaains but have you got the touch?"_ Oh, yes! Karaoke! Nikki stumbles slightly and Kate just manages to catch them both, sending the two women into hysterical peels of laughter. A moment later there's the sound of clattering footsteps and Dutchy catches up with them, his gaze just as blurred as theirs.

"You could sing a song  _we_ could join in on." He suggests, pulling a face. "Shania Twain, though?" He looks to Kate, as though expecting that she would back him up, however Kate shakes her head and tips her head back slightly.

" _Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright_ _!"_ Kate joins in on Nikki's song, raising a hand as though greeting an audience. " _But that won't keep me warm in the- woah!_ " She curses as she stumbles slightly, her heel tipping slightly on a crack in the footpath, and Dutchy just manages to help her.

"You're fucking trashed, the both of you." He muses drily. Nikki continues singing, Kate pausing only to poke a tongue out at him before joining in.

" _That don't impress meeeeee much!"_

"So, I must ask..." 2Dads interjects, jogging to catch up to the singing duo and the bemused Dutchy. He too is unsteady on his feet, and just manages to right himself as the footpath levels down to the road. "Kate, were you this gone at your 21st?"

Kate looks to Dutchy, trying to imagine him as a 21-year-old, then realises that 2Dads is looking expectantly at her. "Me?" She lets out a derisive snort of laughter. "I had a two year old and a twelve-year-old! Was lucky if I drank a coffee that hadn't gone cone stold. I mean..." She frowns, and for the first time seems to recognise her surroundings. "Oh. We're here?"

"We're... where?" Dutchy frowns, squinting himself so that he can see the surroundings better. "The karaoke bar isn't for another block. We should have got an Uber."

"Noooo." Kate ducks out from under Nikki's arm and moves towards a laneway. "No. He lives down here!" Then, quite suddenly she stops, and clicks her heels together, before turning back to rejoin Nikki. "But I broke up with him. Because I'm an arsehole."

"Why'du go 'n do thatfor?" Nikki questions, and she too has to squint to focus on Kate's features. "Whoa! There are two o' you now!" Nikki shrugs and kicks a foot in front of her. "It's okay, though. 'Cos Josh 'n I break up all the time. And then we get back together. And the sex is great." She whips around and grins in the direction of ET. "Isn' that right, babe?"

"Okay. Maybe no more drinking for you both?" Dutchy suggests as ET lets out a sound that  _might_ be a victory cheer.

Kate looks at him inquisitively for a moment before shrugging. "Oh well." She sighs, then turns back to Nikki and resumes their singing.

"I think we should have confiscated their shoes." Charge muses, nodding to the women and their pointed heels. "Don't think I could walk in them sober. Let alone... ah... not sober?"

"Tattoos!" Buffer snaps his finger. "We should all get matching tattoos."

Dutchy glances around at the singing girls, 2Dads now throwing up in the gutter and Charge, Buffer and ET all carrying on conversations with themselves. "Should've gone home with Chris and Spide." He mutters to himself. "I'm the most sober drunk one here."

* * *

Kate grins as she staggers back to Nikki, very nearly tripping on her heels and grabbing Dutchy for support. He seizes her elbow, steadying her, and she can't help but laugh at the absurdity of it all. "Oops." She chuckles, flopping into the seat next to Nikki. "Think I'm a bit drunk." The words feel heavy on her tongue, and she has to concentrate really hard to stop them from tangling together.

"Yeah, no shit." Nikki calls back, leaning over to be heard over the music. "But then, hey, we all are. Plus..." Nikki jabs a finger into Kate's chest. "You saved my life today. So I reckon I'll be ob-obilgated to hold your hair back." She takes another swig of her drink and shifts closer to Kate. "So what  _did_  happen to the boyfriend? Thought you guys were pretty forever, you know?"

"I ended it." Kate shouts over the roaring of whatever guitar solo is playing in Charge's karaoke song. "He... he didn't understand."

"Didn't understand what?" Nikki frowns, and, geez, they're both sitting next to each other yelling backwards and forwards, but Kate feels the words tumbling from her.

"She attacked Bridie. And... can't stay here. Not when she's living half an hour away. Not safe for her."

"Y'know I don't know who she is, right?" Nikki frowns. "But does'at mean you're leaving?"

"What else can I do?" Kate reaches forwards and takes a shot from the table. She has no idea what's in them or who put them there but she downs it in one, relishing in the burning. "Bee's my kid. I have to... to look after her first."

"No!" Nikki reaches forward and grabs Kate's arm, as though she's threatening to walk out then and there. "Look, I don't get the whole kid thing. But... but that Mike guy looks like he can more than handle a bad guy or two, you know? Plus... do you want to end things with him?"

"No." Kate says before she can stop herself. Nikki raises an eyebrow, and Kate shakes her head, spinning the empty shot glass in her hands. "Ah, but it's complicated."

"Only if you make it so." Nikki points out. "Look at me and Josh. I mean, we work together half the time. And... and I almost died today and so did he. But we make it work. 'Cos if we overanalyse everything, shit falls apart."

"But you don't have a kid."

"True." Nikki concedes. "But he seems to love your kid as much as you do? So he's not an arsehole. And..." Nikki rakes a hand through her hair, scraping it off her neck. "Look, I'm drunk. I don't know what I'm saying. Follow your heart and... and all that shit. But... but don't walk away if it's not what you want to do, you know?" She rests her head on Kate's shoulder. "I'm glad you came to town. Nice to have another girl around in the bloody boys' club."

"Yep." Kate agrees.

"Well..." Nikki sighs, then pulls herself to her feet again, holding out a hand. "If you're leaving, we needa make tonight count. Come dance!"

"No." Kate shakes her head, pulling herself to her feet as well. "Another time. Promise. But I think I have somewhere I need to go."

Nikki grins, as though she knows full well where Kate is headed. "Well, you're not walking alone." She orders, waving her hands. "Buff, 2Dads. We need help!"

* * *

"It's this one!" Kate grins, stooping slightly to smell the pretty purple flowers next to the letter box, before finding she can't quite manage to get up again. She has to use the letterbox to pull herself to her feet once more, and Buffer hastens to assist her up the front steps, although he's not much steadier than she is and they both end up crashing heavily into the door. The resultant crash has Kate raise a finger to her lips and curse. "Shh. You'll wake Rosie."

"You're about to knock on his door." Buffer points out. "Won't that wake her?"

"Oh yeah." Kate hesitates for a moment, then drops quite suddenly into a sitting position, leaning against the brick wall and digging her phone from her pocket. She just manages to notice that her phone's wallpaper has been changed to a photo of 2Dads pulling a face. "So I'll call him. You guys go back. I'm fine. Prooooommmmmise." She sings the last word, opening up her contacts.

"Are you sure?" 2Dads frowns, glancing suspiciously at the house. "I think we should stay. The guy could be a weirdo."

"Or a Liberal." Buffer adds. "Or a dick. But I can beat him up if you need me to."

"He's not a weirdo or a Liberal or a... the other thing." Kate retorts, scrolling through her 'M's before remembering she'd put him under  _Arsehole_ anyway. "He's good. He's too good. He's... oh!" She lets out a grin as the door opens and there stands Mike, looking confused. Kate turns to the phone, then glances back at him. "I was just going to call you with my phone!" She explains. "But you found me."

"Yeah." Mike stares between the three people on his front porch. "Only because it sounds like someone was using a battering ram to break in."

"Oh no! It's late." Kate realises, dragging a hand over her face before turning to Buffer. "What time is it?"

"She's a bit drunk." Buffer explains to the confused Mike.

"We all are." 2Dads adds for good measure. "But... ah, she said she needed to talk to you."

"Yup. She's yours now. We're getting tattoos!"

"I'm not." 2Dads grumbles. "I told you that!"

"Did you want to come?" Buffer asks Mike.

Mike shakes his head, looking utterly lost for words. "Ah... no thanks."

Buffer shrugs and turns around, before spinning once more. "Okay, well, we have delivered her, but we know where you live, so don't hurt her."

"Or we'll burn your house down!" 2Dads pumps a fist in the air. Mike raises an eyebrow at the threat, then casts a weary look towards Kate. For her part, she doesn't look too concerned by the threat.

"We'd get the kid out first." Buffer hastens to add. "We're not monsters."

"RO is." 2Dads mutters. "You right, Kate?"

Kate nods, leaning against the brick wall next to his front door. "I wanted to see you." She mumbles, closing her eyes. The wall is surprisingly comfortable, after all, and- the world suddenly shifts. There's a clattering of the door and a hand catches her, and she looks up to see Mike. "Oh. Oh no."

"Kate, you're wasted." Mike mutters, wrapping an arm around her. "Come inside."

"Okay." Kate is starting to feel sleepy now, resting her head on his shoulder. "I wanted to see you."

"Really?" Mike frowns, closing the door behind them and leading her into the lounge room and into an armchair. "Why did you want to see me?"

"Because I'm in love with you, even if I lie about it. I will always love you. Hey, that's a song." She starts to hum tunelessly as Mike shuffles around in the kitchen. "Where are you going?"

"I'm getting a bucket, because you're going to be hurling your guts up any moment now." Something bright is deposited in her peripheral vision.

"Am not." Kate protests, closing her eyes because the world is starting to spin. "No. I needed to tell you that I lied and I love you and I love Rosie and I'm sorry and I think you were right?"

"Right about what?" Mike frowns, leaning in closer to her and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Right about me maybe potentially being sick."

"Oh." A hand on her shoulder pulls her upright (wasn't she sitting before anyway) and she lets out a groan.

"No! No more moving." She mumbles as he shifts her arms like she's a Barbie Doll.

"You're holding a bucket, Kate." He murmurs. A moment later his hands are pulling her hair out of her face as she vomits spectacularly into the bucket in front of her. "I'm sorry." She gasps between breaths, wiping her mouth with a piece of paper towel that seems to have materialised from nowhere. He sets the bucket down at her feet and fiddles with her hair while she feels tears prickling the corners of her eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come here and be sick. And I never wanted to leave you. I want to stay. But... but I'm scared. Claire hurt her, Mike. And... and I can't let her get hurt. And I know you said you can stop her getting hurt but... but all her life it's been me and I can't get used to someone as good and... and great as you. And..."

"Kate, it's okay. You don't need to explain now."

"I do!" Kate protests. "Because you're looking at me and... and I just threw up in your bucket and it was probably a good bucket that Rosie liked because it's yellow and I hurt you and I need you to know that I love you. That I'm in love with you and you're the only guy I've ever felt like this with and that's scary and I'm so tired and I'm sorry."

"Kate..." She feels gravity tip once more as she's suddenly hoisted up into his arms. "It's okay. I love you too. We can sort this out. But right now, you need sleep."

She has no idea where they're going or what's happening. All she knows is that she's safe in his arms and soon he's depositing her onto something soft. "Sleep." He murmurs.

Kate rolls over and immediately is comforted by the smell of him. "I'll stay." She murmurs, closing her eyes. "Will you stay?"

"Yes." Mike murmurs. "Just give me a minute." She's desperate for sleep, desperate for the bliss that unconsciousness will provide, but she is too aware of his absence to drift off. Soon, however, he's returning to the room and there's a clattering of something plastic and the chink of glass. "Here. Drink as much of this as you can." He instructs. The water soothes her burning throat, but does nothing to help her lurching stomach. She groans and he takes the glass back from her, before tapping the plastic something. "I've cleaned the bucket out. It's right next to you, okay?" He murmurs.

"Okay." She mumbles into the pillow. "But something is eating my leg."

Mike chuckles. "Seriously? It's me, Kate. I'm taking these heels off you. With my hands, I might add." Then her shoes are gone and the bed dips as he slides in next to her.

"Oh." Kate feels as though the very earth is rocking her to sleep. "I'm sorry, Mike." She murmurs.

"It's okay." Mike's breath tickles the back of her neck. "We'll talk in the morning."

"I'm sorry about Rosie's bucket." She manages.

Mike laughs again. "Kate, go to sleep." He whispers.

"Okay." She nods, settling herself more comfortably as his hand wraps around her waist. "Love you."

"Love you too." He whispers, before unconsciousness claims her.


	35. Chapter 35

"I'm going in there." Rose declares as she stills her drumming on the counter in favour of pushing herself to her feet. Every fibre of her being is on edge, so furious she's unable to sit at the bench any longer. "I'm going to bang some saucepans together and wake her-"

"No, you're not." Mike cuts in, taking hold of Rose's shoulder and gently pushing her back to the bench. The girl scowls at him, and if looks could kill, he'd already be dead. "You're going to eat your breakfast and then you're going to Maxine's for the morning." Rose mutters mutinously under her breath, although the words are inaudible to Mike. He thinks that he gets the gist of the muttering, however, because he settles himself in the seat next to her. "Rosie, it's between Kate and I. That's why I didn't tell you we'd..." He trails off, searching for the right words.

"Broken up?" His daughter supplies, clicking her tongue. Tact was never her strongest virtue. "And you  _should_ have told me! It shouldn't have been Bridie sneaking an email through her school account that was the tip off!"

"It's between Kate and I." He repeats, marvelling at how he can sound this calm on the outside when, on the inside, he's just as hurt and confused as the girl sitting before him. "Rosie, when we've figured everything out,  _then_ we'll talk to you both. Okay? That's why I didn't say anything. Because... we had an argument, and we're not entirely sure where we want to go-"

"Don't lie! You don't have to use the word 'we' to protect her." Rose spits darkly, glaring in the direction of Mike's room where Kate is still asleep. "Bridie already said it was her that ended it."

"Rosie, she is not the bad guy here."

"Well, she's certainly not being the good guy! Why does she get to make all the decisions?" Rose's voice grows louder, and Mike knows if he can't calm her again, it'll only be a matter of time before his daughter wakes up what he's sure will be a very hungover Kate.

"Rose. Please, just..." But he's at a loss as to what to say next. Maybe Rose knows something he doesn't. Maybe she would be of some help. But the next moment, he dismisses the notion. Rose's temper and Kate's volatility would be nothing short of catastrophic.

"I just don't get it." She sinks lower into her chair, resting her chin in her hands. "I mean, you still love her, right? And she still loves you?"

Mike's voice is barely a whisper as he fixes his gaze on the bench top. "It's not that simple-"

"But it is!" Rose explodes, slamming a palm against the bench. "It  _is_ that simple! You're just both too stupid and stubborn to realise. Which is  _why_ you need to wake her up and just talk to her!" She frowns at Mike, looking suddenly serious as a new thought seems to occur to her. "Did you sleep with her last night?"

Mike gestures to her toast, still sitting on the plate. "Eat your food, Rosie." Catching her gaze, he realises that she's taken his avoidance at answering as an affirmation, and he rolls his eyes. "I slept in the same bed as her, yes. Nothing else. Not that  _that_ is any of your business, either."

"But that  _means_ something!" Rose gesticulates furiously. Yes, it  _had_  meant something. Having her in his arms again had meant the world to him. It just wasn't real.

A moment later there's a knock at the door and Mike moves to answer it, returning a moment later with Maxine in tow.

"Hey!" Maxine greets cheerfully, taking a seat next to Rose and smiling with all the ease of a perfectly uncomplicated life. She looks by far the happiest one in the kitchen, with her sunglasses perched upon her head and a handbag flung over one shoulder. "How's it going, Kiddo?"

The warning look he throws Rose goes completely ignored. "Well," His daughter begins with a sickly sweet smile. "Uh... Kate broke up with Dad, then showed up in the middle of the night and... now she's passed out drunk in his bed." She tips her head to the side and screws up her face, as though thinking hard. "I think that just about covers the events of the morning. Anything new with you?" Maxine gapes. "No? Well then... I'm going to go get ready."

"Thanks, Rose." Mike growls as Rose stalks out of the kitchen, before a thought occurs to him. "And not one step into my room." He adds, addressing her retreating back. When he turns around, Maxine's face is a mixture of shock and amusement.

"We-ell." She stretches the word, leaning back against the counter. "A lot to unpack in that old sentence. Anything you need to tell me?"

Mike lets out an unintelligible noise and drops his head into his hands. "How much time have you got?"

* * *

"It's just stupid! Both of them!" Rose rants as she twists her necklace backwards and forwards. "I've seen them both.  _You've_ seen them both. They're mad about each other, but all of a sudden, it's over? And he's fine to play the doting boyfriend when she's showing up on our doorstep at who-knows-what-time in the morning, but doesn't want to talk with her when she's sober! And-"

"Rosie, I agree with you, hon! But you've been ranting for the last five minutes." Maxine flicks her indicator and slides into the right lane, easily overtaking a bus. "Look, I get what you're saying. But you're thinking with your head. Your dad isn't."

"Ew." Rose screws up her nose at the thought.

Maxine laughs. "Okay, so I hear now how that sounded, but I swear I meant his heart." She adds, smirking at Rose's expression before her expression turns serious once more. "Look, dating is hard. It's even harder when it's someone you're sure you could have a future with. And even  _more so_  after losing someone."

"I get that!" Rose assures her. "But if they'd just talk and figure it all out..." She sighs and trails off. "When Bee and I first talked about setting them up, it was because we wanted to be sisters. Nothing more than that. But then we both saw them together and... Bee and I can always be friends. But Dad might not get a third chance at love."

Maxine chances a glance at Rose, and feels a surge of pride in the girl. "You've got a good heart, kid." She murmurs, patting Rose on the knee and returning her gaze to the road. "But I think right now, all we can do is give the two of them some space and hope they work it out."

Rose hums in affirmation and rests her head against the window. "Doesn't make it any easier."

"Nope. That it doesn't." She throws another sideways look at Rose and a grin adorns her face once more as a thought occurs to her. She doesn't dislike Kate by any means, but Mike was her friend first, and she hates seeing him so upset. And so, as Maxine drives on, she adds a silent plea to the universe that Kate suffers from the worst hangover in the world.

* * *

"Ouch, my head." Kate moans as she is returned abruptly back into reality with all the grace of a giraffe on hallucinogens. Her skull feels as though someone is trying to shrink it, her mouth is dry and her stomach is churning. Her hand reaches out blindly in the direction of her dressing table, but finds only air. Confused, she slowly peels her eyes open and recognises the room in an instant.  _Mike's._

The events of the night come flooding back to her in a series of fragmented memories, and she wants to hide from the sheer embarrassment of it all.

_Dancing with Nikki._

_Drinks._

_Too many drinks._

_Drunk._

_I love you._

_Stay._

Pulling herself into a half-dignified sitting position, she takes the painkillers and water he'd left on the dresser for her and pads across the room to examine her appearance in the mirror. Her make-up has smudged so much that she looks more like a panda than a woman. Her boobs are half falling out of the-  _bloody hell, is that what I wore out last night?! -_ black strappy top and her jeans are wrinkled. The only thing that looks semi-okay is her hair, which has been scraped into a braid that she's sure she didn't do. A moment later, she remembers Mike pulling her hair from her face, and realises he must have secured it to keep it out of the way. Sighing, she fixes her top and smooths her jeans as best she can, before heading into his bathroom, intent on cleaning herself up.

By the time she's emerged and made her way into the kitchen she's feeling  _slightly_ more human. She's not entirely sure what to say to Mike, but she knows she can't hide in his room forever. With any luck, she'll have time to down some coffee and get her thoughts in order before she sees him and has to-

"Morning." Mike's voice seems to come out of nowhere, and she flinches, whipping around to face him and instantly regretting it as the world starts to spin again. "Or afternoon." He amends, checking his watch. "Nope, still morning for another three minutes and twenty-two seconds." He gestures towards the breakfast bar and she takes a seat, wishing she'd stolen some of Mike's mouthwash as well - everything in her feels disgusting.

"Morning. Uh... I'm sorry. Still a bit out of it." She murmurs, dropping her chin into her hand as she rests an elbow on the bench. Mike says nothing more though, moving to the fridge and pulling out a bottle of milk. She wants to say something, something to make him understand how sorry she is for everything she's dragged him through, but she can't quite find the words. Rubbing at her forehead with a hand, she mutters, "Geez, how much did I drink last night?"

"More than your fair share, I'd say." Mike raises his voice slightly to be heard over the coffee machine. "Judging by your behaviour last night."

"Oh God." She mumbles, cursing ever going out with the rest of the team.

"Don't think God was involved in any of your decisions last night." He mutters. He's saying all the quips he normally would, but as Kate peers at him there's none of the jovial humour she's come to expect from him. He's doing all the things he normally does every other time that she's stayed here, but as she watches him pull a mug from the cupboard and busy himself making her a coffee, all the usual warmth of the action is gone.

"I'm sorry." She repeats.

"Yeah. You said that a lot last night." The spoon clinks angrily against the edge of the mug as he stirs the beverage for her; she can feel the sound reverberating in her skull.

She winces. "Mike-" She begins, but he deposits the coffee in front of her.

"Drink." He instructs tersely.

She hesitates for a fraction of a second before bowing her head. "Thanks." She downs half the coffee straight away, the scalding liquid doing nothing for her nausea but helping her feel a little more human. When she looks up and finds him still not looking at her, she feels her resolve break. "I'm sorry, Mike. About what I said. I shouldn't have freaked out like I did." He bends over and scoops up the dish cloth from the sink, wiping down the coffee machine, and  _dammit_ she needs him to understand. "I didn't say what I did just because I was drunk. I do love you." Fear is bubbling away at her. "Mike, please... I hope that you still love me too."

He wrings out the dish cloth over the sink with a hopelessness she's never seen before. "It'd be fucking easier if I didn't." He murmurs, more to himself than to her. And he sounds so defeated that she wants to cry. "We're going around in bloody circles. You finally open up to me, and then something happens completely outside either of our control, and you want to run away. I can't keep begging you to be with me."

Tears are spilling down her cheeks. And what is the point of wiping them away, anyway? She doesn't care if he sees her cry. All that matters is that she fixes this, now. "Mike-" Her voice cracks, but he holds up a hand.

"No. Right now, it's my turn to talk!" She can feel the anger coming off him now. Fear is bubbling away at her. Not at what he could do to her - she knows he'd never  _ever_ hurt her. No. It's a fear that she's already stuffed this up for good. "You've made it clear that Bridie is your first priority. I get that! Rosie is mine. And I know it's been you and Bridie and Cal against the world. Just like it's been Rosie and I for so long. But if you truly love me and want to be with me, then you need to get your head around the fact that it won't be just the three of you anymore. It'll be five, Kate.  _Five_  people that help and support each other. Five people that don't take off when the going gets tough. And right now, you're just not prepared for that."

"I want to be." She whispers, and it's hard to keep the plea from her tone. "Mike, you know I do."

"Wanting something and working at something are two completely different things. And you never tried to work at that. Whenever something happened, you pulled away. Every time. You never..." His voice falters, but he pushes on. "You never saw me as someone who would help you. Who could help Bridie. And... and you were right, with what you said the other night.  _I_  pursued  _you_.  _I_  bugged  _you_  and pestered and pushed until you agreed to date me. But you weren't ready."

"I wanted to move in with you. To live with you and Rosie and... Mike, please. I didn't mean what I said! I want to be with you."

"But showing up drunk at my door at two in the morning declaring that you love me isn't proof of anything, Kate."

"I didn't just say it because I was drunk."

"But would you have come and said it if you were sober?" He challenges. "I know you! You never come back to me until you need help." His voice is growing louder now, but she can't find the words to make him stop. He's right. "That time that Rosie called you from school when she was scared and upset and alone, it... it just about killed me. But I trusted you. I trusted you with my little girl, because  _she_ trusted  _you_ enough to call you. Do you know how hard that was for me? Terrifying. But if the tables had been turned, would you have let me take Bridie?" She doesn't know what to say. She wants to scream  _yes,_ but in her heart, she knows she wouldn't have. He was right. She was too set in her own ways to reach out to anyone.

He seems to guess what she's thinking, and the smile he bestows upon her is full of sadness. His phone buzzes, and he glances down at it. "Your Uber will be here in five minutes." He mutters, breaking the tense silence. "Your shoes are at the door."

* * *

Cal is waiting in the kitchen, leaning against a bench top and picking at her nails, and for a moment, Kate is reminded of the time, months ago, when Cal had teased her about her 'walk of shame'. The first night she'd spent with Mike. And now...

When Cal hears the door close, she rises and folds her arms across her chest, looking Kate up and down. "How's your hangover?" She queries.

Kate lets out a deep breath. "Shit."

Cal hums in affirmation and takes a step closer. "How's your heart?" For a moment, Kate just stands there. Then the weight of the last few days crashes over her and she crumples, curling into a ball in the middle of the kitchen. In an instant, Cal is there, wrapping her arms around Kate. "Hey, hey. It's going to be okay." She soothes, wrapping her arms around her sister. "It's going to be alright."


	36. Chapter 36

"Earth to Kate? What do you think of this one?" Kate jerks herself out of her daze and turns to her sister as she stands in the doorway of the changing room, holding her hands out as though posing for a photoshoot. In her defence, Cal  _does_ look distinctly catwalk-ready in the tight black dress, but Kate can't squash down her nagging big-sister vibes.

"It's a bit short, isn't it?" She points out as Cal gives an elaborate twirl, piercings glinting as they catch the light. "You're a bit showy."

"Pot kettle black!" Cal scoffs, pointing an accusing figure at Kate. "I saw what you came home in from your little crew get together the other week!" Kate flushes at the memory, but knows Cal is only teasing. "By the way, any chance I could borrow that top one day?"

"Only if I can borrow this dress." Kate quips back as Cal heads back into the change room grinning. "Where would you even wear that?"

"Um?!" Cal adopts a tone as though she is explaining something very simple to someone very dim, raising her voice to be heard through the change room curtain. "Out when we celebrate my favourite sister's birthday!"

Kate lets out a groan and sinks into the boyfriend chair. "I told you, Callie. I don't want to do anything!"

"Come on, Sis! It's your Dirty Thirty! We need to celebrate!" There's a rustle from behind the curtain, followed by a thump. "I'm okay!" Cal mumbles, before speaking loudly again. "Come on! We'll… we'll go out somewhere together! We can bar hop and tell everyone it's your birthday so you get free shots." She tugs the curtain back, holding the dress in one hand and fixing her hair with the other.

Kate narrows her eyes. "You do that often?"

Cal's eyes light up mischievously and she gives a little shrug. "I'm had about five birthdays this year, Sis." She grins, before moving to the register to pay. Kate busies herself with examining the collection of hair ties, bracelets and keyrings atop the counter, though without Cal to distract her, her mind begins to wander back to Mike again.

"No! No no no!" Cal takes her shopping from the worker, thanks her, and quickly links arms with Kate. "We're not thinking about him! We are out, having an adventure and… and treating ourselves to retail therapy!"

Kate lets out an unintelligible grumble but permits Cal to steer her along. "I'm sorry, Cal. I know I've been…"

"Cocooned in your bed and watching an alarming number of Home and Away episodes on YouTube?" Cal supplies. Her poker face cracks when Kate glares at her and she laughs, sweeping her vibrant blue hair from her eyes. "I'm sorry! But, hey, it's true! You never even watched it when it was on TV."

"Yeah, well, it's harder to daydream if I've got to figure out what is happening." Kate grumbles.

"Kate…" Cal begins, but Kate shakes her head.

"No. No, it's fine, Cal. Really." She gives a smile she's really not feeling, hoping that Cal believes her.

Of course, her sister knows her better than that, but she says nothing more as they continue on their way through the shopping centre. "Yeah, well…" She slows as they reach a book store, following Kate's gaze. "Come on, Kate McGeeker." She sighs in a long-suffering sort of way, tugging on her arm. "Let's find you a nice shiny book."

* * *

"You know, I hope you're not absorbing the bad language in this film." Mike muses aloud as he glances between his daughter and the digital form of Elwood Blues on screen.

Rose's finger drums impatiently against the edge of the bowl of popcorn in her lap. "You say that every time we watch Blues Brothers!" She points out, holding the bowl out to her father. "And I've definitely heard you say worse."

"Eh," Mike shrugs lightly. "Got to instil all the parenting lessons before you get too old and cool to watch movies with your old dad every Friday night." She just rolls her eyes, but Mike finds himself gazing at his daughter instead of the screen, trying to figure out exactly when she had gotten so grown up.

Hell, he could remember the day she was born like it was yesterday, the exact expression on Sarah's face as she'd handed Rose to him, and never did he ever imagine that he'd be here, now, raising her alone.

Alone. Because Kate was gone.

"Dad?" He looks up to see Rose peering at him with a mixture of curiosity and pity. "Why don't you call her?"

"Who?" Mike murmurs, turning his gaze back to the TV.

"Meghan Markle. Who else?" Rose pokes a finger into his arm. "Dad, you miss her. You're so distracted you didn't even join in with the '106 miles to Chicago' scene." She jabs a hand in the direction of the TV as though to emphasise the point.

"Rosie, it's over, okay? She couldn't commit, and I ended things."

"But if you just talked to her." Mike says nothing, and Rose tries again. "It's her birthday soon. And you bought her that-"

"Rose, I said no!" More for something to do than any real hunger, he leans over and scoops a handful of popcorn from the bowl. "Please, Rosie. All I want to do is sit and watch a movie with you, okay?"

Rose looks as though she's speaking under protest, but she nods. "Okay." She agrees.

* * *

"He's still completely in love with her." Rose declares as she adjusts the giant red netball bib she's wearing over her sports shirt. "But as usual, he doesn't want to talk about her. Or to her, it seems." She flashes an apologetic smile at Bridie. "I did try, Bee."

"Yeah, well, not having much luck with Mum either." Bridie reports back glumly. "Not helping that Cal is firmly with Mum on Team Act-Like-Mike-Never-Existed. She's been trying to distract her, keep her busy. Not exactly helping me out but at least she's not moping around now."

"I don't know whether I should get Maxine to talk to him. Maybe she can help get him to open up."

"Maybe I should get my Mum drunk." Bridie counters glumly. "Seems to be the only time she lets her guard down."

"Girls!" Their PE teacher snaps suddenly, making them both jump. "Can we begin our game? Or should I wait for you to finish your conversation?"

* * *

It's just past midnight when Cal sneaks in, accompanied by the tell-tale rustling of plastic, and Kate wonders how many more nights like this it'll take before she's up at the dentist with a mouth full of cavities. It's nice though. Kate knows that Cal just wants to help, in her unique Cal way, plying her with sugary treats, or salted snacks, as though that will fill the gaping hole in her heart. But she cares, and... and it's nice not to be alone. So Kate shifts over and flicks the switch that turns her fairy lights on, bathing them in soft white light.

"Heard you moving around." Cal says by way of greeting, smiling at Kate. "Twizzler?"

Kate takes one of the offered lollies and nods. "Got a bit of sleep, at least." She reports with a smile that doesn't quite meet her eyes. "What's keeping you up?"

"Oh, you know..." Cal gives a nonchalant shrug. "Assignments. Politics. The slow degradation of our planet. The ushe." Cal settles herself upon Kate's bed, resting her head next to Kate's. "So, I have narrowed down your birthday celebrations to two places." Kate lets out a groan but Cal ignores it, ploughing on. "Now, we can say goodbye to your twenties partying hard at  _The Woolshed,_ drinks and table dancing and cute guys!" She digs a finger into Kate's ribs and she squirms. " _Or_ we could go to  _Flamingos Tiki Bar_ if you want a bit more of a tropical vibe-"

"And what if I want a 'stay at home' vibe?"

"Don't you keep that in your second draw?" Cal quips, eyes twinkling.

"Oh, fuck off." Kate laughs, jabbing a finger into Cal's ribs.

"Oh, come on! You know we've  _never_ gone out together?  _Ever!_ And I think that this is a gross oversight of my teenage years-"

"We went out for your eighteenth." Kate points out, still not convinced.

"You were deso! It's not the same. Come  _on_! I'll take you out." Cal leans over and takes another Twizzler, looking contemplative.  _"Or_ we could just have a nice dinner here. Could order you a sexy fireman stripper or something. Come to think of it, there's probably a few real fireman that would-"

"If I say I'll go out with you, will you  _shut up_?" Kate reaches over and grabs a t-shirt from the floor, stuffing it into Cal's face. "Just stuff that in your mouth and shh." They both dissolve into laughter as Cal and Kate both start poking and prodding each other. Both women are as ticklish as the other and eventually Kate breaks free. "Fine. Truce! Truce!" She squeals, holding both hands in surrender. "Geez, you're annoying."

"Yeah, well..." Cal settles herself once more upon the pillows. "I'm just like my sister." They both sit in companionable silence for a few moments before Cal speaks again. "You still miss him, don't you?"

"I thought we weren't talking about him." Kate fiddles with the hair tie on her wrist, stretching it and letting it go in sequence, relishing in the sharp flick as it connects with her skin. She goes to pull the hair tie out again, but before she can release it, Cal's hand encircles her wrist.

"Kate..."

"I miss him. Okay?" She can't meet Cal's eye. Even talking about this now is damn near killing her. "I miss him. But... he's right. I can't-" Her fingertips flail in thin air for a moment, trying to find the right words. "I can't hurt him again."

"You've spent your whole life putting other people's happiness before your own." Cal murmurs, her fingers squeezing Kate's hand tight. "Mine... and Bee's and even Mum's. But now, this is your chance. Your chance for happiness. And only you can decide."

It takes everything in Kate to meet her sister's gaze. "What if, after everything I've been through, I... I  _can't_ have a normal life? What if I'm just broken, Cal?"

"Kate-" Cal begins, but Kate shakes her head.

"No! I've always... always pushed people away from me. Lachlan and the team at the firehouse and... and Mike. Love shouldn't terrify, should it? It... it shouldn't be this hard. So... so there must be something wrong with-"

"No." Cal states simply, dismissing Kate's words as casually as though she'd been prattling about horoscopes.

"But-"

" _No,_ Kate! I... I've never been in love, okay? But... but I think that... that you wouldn't be this scared if you didn't love him.  _Being_ this scared to hurt him or... or screw things up... doesn't that  _mean_ something?"

Kate fixes her gaze on her lap. "I think he's the only guy I could ever see myself having a future with." The words hurt, because she knows now there will be no future. "But... but I can't."

"Kate, you  _can_ win him back. But... it has to be all of you. Mike doesn't just want you when you're happy or... or feeling safe. He wants to be there through the good times and the bad. He wants to help you and support you, and... and he wants you to do the same for him to. All this time you've been looking back for the emergency exit. If you want this to work, he needs to know that you trust him enough to let him guide you through."

Kate frowns. "Through what?"

"Life?" Cal frowns, before dismissing the thought with a wave. "I don't know! I'm not good with metaphors! I mean, I  _tried_ to tie it all in to the firefighting side of things with the emergency- you know what? It doesn't matter. You get the point, Kate. And the  _point_ is, you're in love with the guy and you want him back."

For a moment, the denial is on the tip of her tongue. The defence, the perfect disclaimer that will protect her heart. But then she realises that this is exactly what Cal and Mike are talking about. This, being vulnerable... she's always seen it as a weakness, as an easy way to get hurt. And, dammit, he might still turn her down. But she knows she won't be able to live with herself if she doesn't try. "Yeah." She agrees. "I do."


	37. Chapter 37

Mike thinks about her as he sands down his latest boat. In his workshop, away from the rest of the world and Rosie's all-knowing stares, he can afford to lose himself in his thoughts. And the sanding is quiet, mindless work really. Easy to drift off with.

He'd always fantasised about taking Kate out onto one of his boats. He was sure that the love of the sea would be in her blood too, just as it was in his, and he could just imagine her hair flying about her as she stood out on the deck, flying over the waves. Kate seemed to go hand-in-hand with the sea, after all. Stubborn, ever changing. Beautiful.

Now, it was never going to happen. Never, because she couldn't just let go and trust that he would be there. Never, because he was too stubborn. Never, because he'd pushed her away.

He knows that in his heart of hearts it was the right call. It just didn't make it hurt any less.

"You right there?" Maxine's words tear him from his thoughts and he whips around to see her leaning against his workbench, a six pack of beer held in one hand. "You look like you're going to sand that until it's nothing more than dust."

He stills, hands hanging loosely by his side for a moment. Then he nods at the beer in her hand. "That for us?"

* * *

"You could just call her." Maxine points out, taking a swig of her beer and fiddling absentmindedly with a screwdriver in one hand, turning it over in her fingers. She's always been like that as long as he's known her, always needing something to fidget with.

"You know why I can't, Max." Mike responds dully, fingers trailing in the condensation on his bottle. "She needs to make the effort too."

She looks at him pensively for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, I know. I just..." She hesitates for so long that Mike has to prompt her to keep speaking.

"Just what?"

Maxine swallows hard and continues. "It was just nice... to see you happy."

He doesn't know what to say to that. What else  _can_ he say? Yes, he was happy. And so was she. But it was a happiness built on a house of cards. Destined to sour. He flicks at the bottle cap beside him, sending it skidding across the dusty concrete floor. "I really thought we had a future, Max." He feels embarrassed, even to admit that aloud. And, God, he hates the look of pity upon Maxine's face and the intensity of her gaze, but he needs to talk about this with someone or he feels like he's going to explode. "After Sarah, she was... I've never felt that way about anyone else. And Rosie... Rose deserves someone in her life. Someone other than me. But... she wasn't all in. And I had to. Because otherwise, it would have ended, wouldn't it?"

"I don't have all the answers, Mike." Maxine murmurs. She reaches out and squeezes his arm. "I wish I did. It would make things a lot easier. But... you did what you felt you had to. And that's something, isn't it? I mean, it wasn't some spur of the moment decision. You thought it out."

"Yeah." He agrees. "Doesn't make it suck any less."

"No, it doesn't." She agrees.

For a moment, the two of them just sit there, slowly sipping their beer while the world outside lives and loves. But sitting in misery wouldn't change his situation. So he draws in a shuddering breath and turns to Maxine. "But you didn't come here with a six pack to hear me prattle on about Kate. What's up?"

Maxine lets out a humourless laugh and takes another swig of her drink. "Just a small midlife crisis. Officially making me feel super old, my son now has a girlfriend."

"You came around with a six pack to tell me that?" Mike chuckles as he spots the tense look on Maxine's face. "Oh, come on Max! You're only a few months older than me. What's the crisis!"

"Hey," Maxine throws her hands in the air in an exasperated fashion. "You have your crisis and I'll have mine, thank you very much! I'm allowed to need beer for this!"

"Fair point." Mike acknowledges, wincing as he realises that the dating scene is only a few years away for Rosie. "So what's she like?"

"Her name is Jess and she is like the human form of a My Little Pony." Maxine quips, taking another sip. "And eyes as bloody wide as tennis balls. But sweet, I guess." She rakes a hand through her hair. "Urgh, I just... he's my little boy. And now he's fifteen and dating and... no. It's too much!" A small smile adorns her face. "Mind you, I don't know who was more embarrassed when he was telling me. The poor kid could barely get the words out. He didn't want to give me her last name at first. I think he thought I'd run a background check on her."

"You can't tell me the thought never crossed your mind."

"Yeah, well..." She sighs and leans back against the work bench. A moment later, however, her words escape her in a whine, as though she's an overemotional toddler. "He's my  _baby!_ " She flashes a dangerous look at him as he continues to laugh. "Oh, piss off Flynn. You just wait 'til it's Rosie out til all hours."

"Hey, Rosie's a good girl!"

"It's the quiet ones you need to watch the most." Maxine warns, eyes twinkling as Mike stares at her aghast. "Only a few more years." She pulls herself to her feet and ruffles his hair. "Then bye-bye brown and hello grey!" She drops the beer bottle into the box that's serving as the recycling bin and makes her way towards the door. "Thanks for the beer and  _un_ sympathy. Tick tock, Daddy!"

* * *

In truth, Kate's get-Mike-back plans hit the backburner, pun definitely not intended. With the temperatures and winds both soaring, Kate spends much of her time travelling from call out to call out, the scent of smoke permanently etched into her nostrils.

"You need a holiday..." Cal declares as Kate returns home one night and promptly flops upon the lounge. Cal sniffs at the air for a moment, then adds, "...and a shower."

"Funny." Kate stretches out and closes her eyes for a moment, before glancing at the TV Cal has just muted. Along a banner at the bottom, news of other fires across Australia are being headlined. "I'd hate to be back in the mountains for this one."

"Have you heard from any of the guys?"

"Heard from Hocko and Stainsey but that's about it. They've been working basically non-stop for the last few days." Of course, that was nothing new for weather like this back home, and Kate remembers the sleepless nights spent behind a hose, or tossing in an uncomfortable bunk.

"I've been watching it on the news. It's crazy." Cal shifts in her armchair. "I was remembering all those times you'd send me to a motel with Bridie just to keep us away from it all. And then watching the news and knowing you were right out in the thick of it..." She trails off. "I hate the smell of smoke." She finishes, somewhat lamely. Kate nods mutely, hearing a satisfying pop in her joints as she stretches. "Sometimes I wish you'd just worked in retail or something."

Kate lets out a dry laugh as she imagines herself behind a cash register. "What? Me in customer service? No thank you." She nods at the hallway. "How's Bee been?"

Cal throws a quick glance behind her to check that the girl in question was not eavesdropping, even though it's nearing midnight, before answering. "She asked me if I'd take her to see Claire again."

"What?!" Any tiredness that Kate had been feeling disappears in an instant. Sitting bolt upright, Kate shakes her head. "No! No, Cal, I won't-"

"Give me some credit, Kate!" Cal protests, holding her hands up to stem Kate's words. "Of course I said no. I told her it was something she'd need to talk to you about."

"Why?" Kate mumbles, dragging a hand through her hair. "Why would she want to go back after what happened last time-"

"Because she's... she wants to help." Cal suggests. "And I guess, there's the pull, isn't there? I mean..." She lowers her voice, as though she's about to say something completely awful and cruel. "Well, I just mean... they're family, sort of. Aren't they?"

There is no right answer. Technically speaking, Cal is right. But the idea of Bridie having any familial ties to that family is to dire a thought to consider. Dragging a tired hand through her hair, she curses under her breath. "Geez, I've been a shit mother."

"No you haven't!" Cal protests.

"I've just been so busy at work and then with Mike and not properly talking to her and all this-"

"Kate!" Cal interjects. "She'll be okay." She squeezes Kate's hand. "You'll be okay."

* * *

Despite only managing to get a few hours of sleep that night, the next morning Kate drags herself out of bed before seven and makes both Cal and Bridie a packed lunch. It's not as if either of them really still need her to make their lunch for them - Bridie is more than capable and Cal... well, even more so. It's just that Kate doesn't quite know how to make it up to them for the way she has been over the last few weeks, only that she needs to make a start.

When Cal moves into the kitchen, Kate is already on her third mug of coffee and in the midst of preparing grilled cheese sandwiches for breakfast. "Ooh! Fancy!" Cal teases as she perches on the bar stool and takes the offered plate.

"Hey, I tried!" Kate sticks her tongue out at her younger sister. Grilled cheese was about the extent of her cooking talents. She'd learned from a young age that she mostly did okay without the involvement of any heating elements, but that it quickly went downhill from there. The sandwich toaster was the only element Kate hasn't ever accidentally started a fire with.

"And I love you for it. Delish!" Cal pulls the toasted sandwich away from her, stretching the string of cheese until it breaks and grinning goofily like a child. "So? What has you up this early?"

"I couldn't really sleep." Kate perches on the bar stool next to Cal and leans against the bench top. "So I thought I'd get up and take Bridie to school and let you get some assignments done."

"Are you sure?" Cal looks at her with an air of unease. "I mean, you look a bit... knackered?"

Kate throws her hands up and exhales heavily. "Hey, sleep is for the weak. Plus, I have coffee!" She grins and hoists the mug into the air. Cal rolls her eyes.

"You're cracked." She announces, just as Bridie makes her way into the kitchen.

"Who's cracked?" Bridie asks as she settles herself onto the other kitchen stool. "You made breakfast?" She turns to Cal and jabs a thumb over her shoulder. "She really  _is_ cracked."

"Oi!"

* * *

"You know, this is probably considered child abuse in some countries." Rose glowers at him as she clutches the freshly signed note tightly in her hand.  _"Please,_  Dad can you  _just_ rewrite it?"

"No. It's the principle of the matter." Rose aims a kick at a rock. It skitters along the footpath before hitting the trunk of a nearby tree with a dull  _thwack. "_ Don't get cranky, Rosie. I told you..." Mike warns, even though there's a wide smile on his face. "If you're going to keep losing your permission slips, then I'm going to rewrite them how I choose."

Rose mutters something inaudible under her breath and unfolds the note once more, glaring down at it. Mike touches her elbow and steers her out of the way of a cyclist she'd missed. He distinctly sees her mouth the words  _my little girl_ as she reads over the note once more.

After that, Rose stops talking to him. It's a tactic she's used many times before, but he knows that she'll forgive him by the end of school. At least, he hopes so. As they make their way up towards the school gates, Mike finds himself walking slower. Even when she was giving him the silent treatment, he still loved Rosie's company. Resigning himself to another day with just him and his thoughts, he turns to say goodbye to Rose, only to spot the woman behind him.

"Kate." She's leaning against the school gate next to Bridie and chatting away. And he feels a twinge of resentment that she gets to look so carefree and calm while he is there with his heart breaking and his head all over the place. Hell, she even looks like she's had time to put makeup on. He runs a hand nervously through his hair, trying to flatten it.

She looks up at his involuntary shout and for a moment he could almost swear... was it a flicker of regret in her eyes? Or was it just wishful thinking. A fumbling beat of a heart and then she smiles politely and makes her way towards him and Rose, Bridie trailing along behind.

"Hi." She greets. "Hi, Rosie."

"Hi Kate." Mike doesn't look at his daughter, but he can feel her gaze on the back of his neck, and he knows she's willing him to say something,  _anything_. He can't though, can't make the words, and Rose ploughs on. "Can you tell Dad that  _this_ is just completely mean?" She hands the note over to Kate, who unfolds it and reads aloud.

"' _To the dear and fair Miss Brownstone, please forgive my little girl her losing your beautifully written permission slip for the excursion tomorrow. I can only hope that this mad rambling suffices. I, Mike Flynn, Rose Flynn's good looking father, give my permission for my Rosie-Roo to attend the excursion to Cairns Aquarium, and have enclosed the $28 fee. I ask only that you hold her hand around the sharks. She is a sensitive girl, and the last time we took her to the sharks, I fear she didn't come through it too happy. If there are any concerns, please feel free to call me at any time. Yours Most Sincerely, Michael Flynn.'_ " Kate finishes reading and looks to Rosie. "I am so sorry, hon. That's terrible." She rounds on him, but despite her stern nature, the corners of her mouth are twitching. "That's cruel, Mike."

"I thought you'd be on my side!" Mike protests, smirking. "After all, you and your sister are the greenies. You know how many permission slips she loses. I was saving trees by refusing to allow her to collect a third."

"And flirting with the teacher?" She challenges.

"Well, that's just all part of my charm." He can't help but smile at her, and she's smiling back, and he wonders if this will ever be enough, whether he'll ever be content with just having her in his life as a friend. Or will there always be that regret, that loss? Will he always feel the twinge of sadness every time he sees her smile. There is no playbook, no rules to dictate how to act around her. No timeline to say when he would be able to look at her without having to pretend he wasn't daydreaming about the hours of yesteryear.

No. The smile fades, and so does hers. Too soon. "Uh, we're gonna head in." Bridie's voice interrupts, and he starts. He'd almost forgotten that they were there. "Or we'll be late."

"Yeah." Rose agrees, and Mike forces himself to look at his daughter, to concentrate on her. Even if he had nothing else in the world,  _she_ was enough. Rose smiles at him in a reassuring way before turning to Kate. "Don't suppose there's any laws about firefighters being legally allowed to forge people's signatures?"

"Sadly, no." Kate smiles sympathetically. "But you can always sell his Pokemon cards on eBay as revenge." She gives Bridie a hug, and waves the girls off as they make their way into the school. Leaving the two of them alone.

"How have you been?" He asks before he's had time to think about it. "With the fires I mean." He gestures around. "It's been so smoky, I figured you'd have your hands full."

"Oh. Yeah, it's been... pretty crazy. You?" They fall into step as they make their way along the footpath. Is she holding her breath, tensing her shoulders and obsessing too much about where to place her feet as well? Or is she so over him that she's actually able to talk to him without having a complete meltdown.

"Good. Uh. Busy? Well, not really. I-" He stops, forces himself to think. "A few more canoes and stuff, but that's about it."

"Mike," She opens her mouth as if about to say something else. But he suddenly finds himself faced with the bleak reality of their situation.

And he can't be around her any more. "I need to go." He interrupts, and before she can say another word, he has already turned away.


	38. Chapter 38

"He doesn't feel the same, Cal. I don't know why I even bother." Kate just manages to make herself heard over the pounding bass of whatever club Cal had dragged her to. Her whole body is on edge, crackling as though flooded with electricity. It's more than just embarrassment. She's angry. Angry at herself and at Mike and Patrick and every other moment in her life that has aligned to turn fate against her. "He doesn't love me. Hell, he could barely look at me." She swipes angrily at the wetness in her eyes, blinking furiously. She won't cry for this.

"Kate, stop!" Cal reaches out, but Kate twists her body, so that she's well out of Cal's reach.

"Don't try to talk me out of this one. I should never have done this." She catches sight of her reflection in the shiny metal of the mirror behind the bar and stills, staring at herself. Unlovable. Unwanted. And she heaves a heavy sigh. "No." She turns to her sister. "Look, it's better this way, right?"

"Um..." Cal begins, looking unnerved at the sudden change of heart.

"No." Kate shakes her head. "I was never meant to be with him, Cal. He was just... a distraction. A blip. But... I'm  _me_ now and... I should be celebrating, right? I mean..." She lets out a bark of laughter. "I'm thirty! I'm at my prime.  _Ish_. What is he, really?"

"Sis, you sound like a mental patient..." Cal says bluntly, sliding a shot glass across to Kate and downing her own without so much as a shudder. "And I'm sure he-"

"No!" Kate waves a hand, forcing a smile. "No more talk about him, alright? It's better this way." She downs the shot, then winces as the drink (if you could call it that; Kate has no idea exactly  _what_ was in it, but it seems more like gasoline than anything) burns its way down her throat.  _"Fucking hell,_  Callie." She has to fight the urge to gag, shaking her head profusely. "No. I'm not going to waste any more time on him."

"You do realise you just did a complete 180, right?" Cal rolls her eyes, slamming the glass upon the bartop with such force, Kate is surprised it doesn't break. Cal looks unabashed, however, nodding absentmindedly to the music playing. Kate finds her mind starting to wander as her gaze flicks around at the people around her. Most of them are closer to Cal's age than her own; indeed, Cal has already greeted at least three uni friends.

Kate is saved the trouble of retorting as Cal is approached by yet another, and by the time Cal has said goodbye to them, she seems to have forgotten her previous train of thought. "Okay, so new plan!" Cal calls out several minutes later, tapping at Kate's arm over and over again to get her attention. Kate hums in affirmation, resting her chin on her hand. "And this is a super awesome plan so you can't dismiss it, okay?"

"Come on, Callie!" Kate groans, putting her own shot glass back down on the bar with a little more grace than Cal. "I don't need you to fix my love life."

"What?" Cal frowns, before her eyes widen. "Oh! No! I was thinking we should get matching tattoos!" She brushes a finger over the skin of Kate's wrist. "Right here..."

Kate snatches her wrist back, rolling her eyes. "I am not nearly drunk enough for you to convince me of that." She points out, though she must admit she's certainly feeling the alcohol, especially as Cal signals the bartender for another round.

"It's her birthday!" Cal calls to him, flashing him a flirtatious smile and winking.

"Shut up!" Kate pokes her sister hard in the ribs, and she twitches, always overly ticklish on her stomach.

"Oi! Not fair." Cal tugs her dress lower down her legs, mumbling inaudibly under her breath. The bartender sets two more shots down in front of them, looking Kate up and down with interest and flashing them both a smile that tells Kate he's definitely enjoying the attention.

"On the house." He winks. "Happy Birthday!"

* * *

She's determined to have fun. To forget, just for a little, that her life is spiralling. And she does...  _almost_  forget. Cal does her best to keep her distracted, dragging her up to dance and drink and beg the DJ for their favourite songs. Cal tries and fails to talk her into getting a tattoo, but after last time with the crew, Kate had made a point to watch her alcohol content, and she just shook her head at her younger sister. She trades $10 into coins at the bar and together, they hit the arcade games in the kids club, failing splendidly at the claw machine but leaving with both their handbags stuffed full of chocolate from the chocolate machine. Then they head for the racing arcade game, although the race quickly descends into sabotage as Kate and Cal both poke and prod each other or jerk rival steering wheels.

None of the digital distractions seem to quell Cal's enthusiasm at having Kate meet new people. She downloads Snapchat and Tinder onto Kate's phone before she can so much as protest, and sets about scrolling through the nearby men. "Uh, I don't need  _that,_ Cal!" She groans, trying and failing to grab her phone back before catching sight of a profile of a man who looks to be at least in his fifties. "Wow. He is so not twenty-six!" But she has to admit it's entertaining enough to flick through.

"Of course, we could have just gotten the bartender's number and have done with it." Cal giggles as they leave the club just after one, Kate's eyes itching with tiredness. "He seemed quite keen on you."

"Piss off." Kate quips back, as they slide into the back of an Uber, smiling softly to herself.

* * *

"So, how was your night of sinful indulgence and shirking of parental responsibilities?" Bridie enquires idly as Kate makes her way to the kitchen the next morning. Admittedly, she's not feeling as terrible as she'd feared, but the slight headache at the edge of her skull is uncomfortable nonetheless.

"Your aunt is a terrible influence." Kate reports, bustling about making herself a coffee.

"Cheek!" Cal grumbles from the lounge, still in her clothes from the previous night. She'd plonked herself onto the lounge the previous night and declared she wasn't moving anymore, so Kate had let her be. "Kate hooked up with the bartender!"

"No, I didn't!" Kate protests, dropping two Nurofen purposefully onto Kate's forehead, so that she jerks and flinches. "The most wild thing I did was dance with Cal. Your aunt is also a liar." Kate aims a flick at Cal's ear for good measure. Cal groans unintelligibly, but takes the offered medicine, and once she's sure that there is no planned revenge, Kate turns her attention back to Bridie. "How was it with Mrs Baxter?"

Bridie lets out a tired groan. "Urgh, can I  _please_ stay home by myself next time? Mrs Baxter just wants to watch Miss Marple with the subtitles on. Has it occurred to you that I'm old enough to be by myself without a babysitter?"

"Not for a night." Kate shakes her head. "But trust me, I think Cal is done for a while. No more nights out for me either. At least not until I turn forty. So you're free from Miss Marple for a while, yet."

"Good! Well, in that case,  _Happy Birthday."_ She slides over a gift bag and deposits it in front of Kate. Kate opens it and pulls out a beautiful maxi-dress, all shimmering blues and purples. Bridie grins as Kate holds it up to her body, smiling.

"Oh, Bee, this is beautiful." She exclaims, swishing the fabric around.

"Yeah." Cal agrees, still not sitting up. "Your bartender would like it."

* * *

If there's one thing she hates more than anything else, it's having everyone's eyes on her as they sing  _Happy Birthday,_ and, most unfortunately, Cal seems to be intent on singing it one word at a time the whole day. Cal trumpets the first  _Happy_ after the painkillers kick in, and Kate doesn't hear the last  _You_ until she's in the locker rooms at work changing for her night shift, her voice trumpeting through the Snapchat message Kate had just opened.

Deciding that her sister had more than won their little war today, Kate quickly silences her phone (Cal has set the damned video to repeat), but Nikki's excited gaze tells her that she's already lost. She says nothing though, and Kate has just began to entertain the possibility that she didn't understand the message, when Charge emerges holding a cake laden with candles. They sing the whole damn song for her again.

After cake, Kate spends the rest of the afternoon idly checking out rental properties online, scrolling through the limited choices available to her as she nibbles on her lip in an offhand sort of fashion. It's been a slow shift, and after cake and the limited options for wearing off their sugar, 2Dads starts his jokes again.

"I want to buy an owl off you, RO!" 2Dads calls out, barely concealing his grin as he spots Robert sitting dutifully at him communication desk.

RO narrows his eyes in confusion and mistrust, as though he knows that the whole thing is a joke but just can't work out the punchline. Charge has turned around to give 2Dads an equally confused look, and the rest of them turn to observe the rest of the interaction. "I don't sell owls, 2Dads." Robert settles on simply.

"Really? Somebody told me you were selling owls." 2Dads persists, staring eagerly at RO. He looks like a kid anxiously opening a Christmas present, practically bouncing on his feet.

RO hesitates for a moment before shaking his head dismissively. "No one would have told you that."

2Dads' hopeful look starts to fade, but he persists. " _Somebody_  did."

RO irritably shuffles the papers on his desk, scowling. "2Dads, I refuse to continue discussing this."

"Just ask him  _who!"_ Dutchy interjects, pushing himself out of his chair. "Geez, we'll be here all day, 2Dads!"

"Dammit." 2Dads shakes his head at Dutchy's outburst and RO's continued confusion. "You're supposed to ask me  _who,_ and then I get to say I heard one. Geez, RO, you suck all the fun out of-" The buzzer goes off, alerting them to a traffic incident, and Kate thanks the heavens that the squabbling stops.

* * *

The truck cuts its way through the city streets, sirens blazing, and Kate finds herself, already full of sugar from a double helping of cake, quite on edge. The job itself is a simple one though, just using the jaws to cut through the frame of a car to free a trapped passenger, and then working on the clean up. It's enough to distract Kate entirely however as she spots the police officer on the cordon.

For a moment, she considers hiding from the woman. Then, she realises that the notion is childish. She was a professional, dammit, whatever her issues with Mike. So Kate takes a few steps closer and smiles politely. "Maxine."

Maxine looks so different in uniform. Sterner, perhaps. More polished. Scarier. She regards Kate for a moment, then smiles too. "Kate." She grins. "Lovely to see you again." They both turn to face the accident now being swept away.  _Lovely_ wasn't exactly the word she'd use. "Bit of a mess, hey?"

"Yes." Kate agrees, wishing she had thought of something of substance to add before making her way over here. Dammit, she was just standing here like some gormless robot nodding when- "How's Mike?" The question escapes her before she's even really considered the ramifications of it all. She flushes. "Sorry. Stupid question. I-"

Kate's half-expecting Maxine to shout her down for hurting her friend. But she also knows that any lecture, she will deserve. But when Maxine speaks, her voice is softer than Kate expects it to be. "You're not too late, you know." She murmurs.

"What?" Kate whips around, completely taken aback. "I..."

Maxine glances around, as though making sure that they're not being overheard. Then she adds, "Fight for him. Mike still loves you. You're not too late."


	39. Chapter 39

_It's not too late. It's not too late._

She's never needed to believe in anything so badly. Maxine's words echo through her head on the trip back to the station, her mind so distant that she is simply on autopilot as she restows her gear and makes her way down to the locker to pull out her mobile phone.

_It's not too late._

She still has no idea how she can fix it and no idea what to do, but the mere reassurance of Maxine's words has rekindled the determination in her, and she finds herself pacing up and down the locker room after shift, chewing absently at a hangnail. This whole thing was new to her. She'd never been in a serious relationship before, had never been one to talk about her feelings and put herself on the line. But Mike had made her want all that.

She just hadn't been enough for him. But now, here, was her last chance to prove to him that she could be, that they could complete each others' lives and be happy and...

And be a family.

The family that they both craved, both deserved.  _All_ deserved.

* * *

As she unlocks the door, she's immediately confronted by two guilty looking faces eating icecream. Momentarily thrown, she stills, taking in the scene. "I'll buy you more, I promise." Cal interjects before Kate has even noticed the two empty Crunchie wrappers beside them, or the fact that they're using them instead of spoons to dip at their ice cream.

"Thief." Kate accuses, flopping sideways into the armchair, so that her feet hang over one of the arms. But she says no more on the matter of the stolen chocolate and, after a few moments, Cal and Bridie return to their eating.

"So..." Cal says between alternate bites and slurps. "How was work?"

"Oh, the usual." Kate sighs, one hand absentmindedly freeing her hair from its plait. "2Dads stirring up RO, Dutchy stirring up me. Nothing new." She rakes a hand through her hair, so that it flops in waves around her. Of course, Dutchy really hadn't been stirring. Just asking her again if she'd found a place to live yet. Which she hadn't. She only hoped that Cal was having more luck. But that was a problem for another day. "I... I saw Maxine." She voices the statement as calmly as she can, even though inside, her heart is pounding. On the trip home she'd gone over dozens and dozens of possibilities of what to say to him, of how to even address this, each considered and dismissed in turn, until she'd mercifully found herself at home. "You know..." She presses, focusing her gaze on a spot of peeling paint above her. "Mike's friend." She can feel Bridie and Cal's eyes fixed on her, as though waiting for her to cry, or jump up or some other ridiculously out of character emotion.

"Hey, Bee, can you-" Cal begins, tentatively, but Bridie forestalls her.

"Find an excuse to disappear, yeah yeah." She concedes, standing up and making to move away. However, Kate sits up.

"No." They both freeze, staring at her, and Kate forces herself to keep talking. "This affects all of us. We're... we're a family. Bee, I... I need you to help me too." Bridie looks confused but settles herself back down, and Kate takes a deep breath. "Maxine reckons it's not too late. She... she says that Mike still loves me."

"Well, duh!" Bridie throws her hands in the air, scooping up another lump of icecream. "I could have told you that  _ages_ ago, Mum!"

Kate ignores the dig. "I still love him, and... and if there's any way I can make it work... but-"

"If you are asking us for permission, Kate McGregor, I just might hit you." Cal interjects, rolling her eyes. "But the real question is, why are you here? Why aren't you boomboxing  _Careless Whisper_  under his window or riding that man-" Kate coughs pointedly, nodding at Bridie, and Cal changes tact. "Look, I'm in. Bridie's in. Rose is in. We've all just been waiting for you to be ready."

Bridie reaches across and squeezes Kate's hand, and it strikes Kate in that moment just how grown up her little girl is looking. "You've sacrificed so much to make sure we're happy, Mum." She whispers. "Now, it's your turn for a happily ever after."

* * *

Maxine wonders if it's possible to damage your eyes from over-rolling them as she sits on her lounge, flicking idly through the Saturday morning channels on the TV while Ryan video chats to Jess. With constant declarations of love flying from both directions, and many fond petnames coming from her son's mouth, Maxine feels as though she needs to watch a slasher movie to escape from all the mushiness.

"Aww, Jess... I can't wait to see your beautiful eyes." Ryan murmurs in a sickening voice, and she flicks the volume up louder on the Czech news, throwing an irritated glance at Ryan's half-eaten cereal that was probably now just mush, sitting abandoned where he'd left it. Whatever happened to their 'no phones during meals' rule anyway? Okay, so it wasn't as though she was begrudging the relationship. Jess was a sweet enough kid. But hearing her son called 'sugar' by a girl Maxine has only met a handful of times is nauseating to say the least.

A beep from her phone has her instinctively scrambling for it, praying for a distraction. She only feels a  _twinge_ of hypocrisy at her earlier thought about phone restrictions, quickly stifled by her justification that she'd finished eating long ago, and so she answers the unfamiliar number.

"White." She greets tersely, not sure whether she wants her weekend off to be interrupted by work or not. She'd hoped to actually get to spend the weekend with Ryan, rather than the Ryan-and-Jess show it had been ever since they had started dating. And hell, they'd seen each other the night before,  _and_ were going out to dinner! What more could they have to say? ' _Hey babe, I dreamed about penguins last_   _night?_ '

" _Maxine, it's Kate."_ Kate's voice comes through the phone, and despite the slight fear in her voice, she sounds more certain than Maxine has ever heard her before. " _I know you don't owe me anything, but I was wondering if you could help me."_

Listening to Kate's plan, the corners of Maxine's lips twitch, and she feels her opinions on romance shift, just a little.

* * *

"Alright!" Maxine declares five minutes later, after hanging up with Kate. She moves quickly to Ryan, resting her head on his shoulder and waving to Jess. "Sorry, Sweetie. Loverboy has to hang up! We've got a relationship to save."

* * *

Mike backs his car into the last available spot in the carpark and looks around at the rest of the cars. "None of these are Max's. I don't know why she wanted to meet here of all places." He puzzles to Rosie, twisting around to get a look at her, frowning. "And why do you think she wants to meet here by the water? She's going to be getting all antsy at people breaking maritime law and all that."

"What are you on about?"

"Oh, come on, I had one beer fishing and I thought Max was gonna breathalise me. I hope she's not like that today." He adopts a mock look of terror. "Unless she's gone over to the dark side. Oh no! She could be a dirty cop?"

Rose, for her part, seems unmoved by Mike's jokes, and scoops up the bag before he has a chance to look any closer at it. "Come on, Dad. She said to meet here. And she probably walked. She only lives fifteen minutes away, and you know how impatient she gets trying to find a parking spot." She clambers out of the car without a backwards glance and making her way along the path towards the water.

"Kids." Mike muses to the empty vehicle, before following, wondering what 'Cheer Up Plan' Maxine has concocted for him this time, following Rose along the footpath. Despite the unseasonably cool day, several families have already set up underneath each of the adjoining park's gazebos overlooking the water, celebrating birthdays and baby showers and who knows what else. He lets Rose lead the way, meandering along behind her, and his eyes catch upon a sailboat in the water beyond, carving its way through the waves. It was a beautiful day for the water, and he'd been considering taking Rose on one of the boats around the harbor before Maxine had called.

Very nearly tripping over a rock with his focus so far away from his current self, he forces himself to refocus, looking around for where Rosie has gotten to. And his jaw drops. Because it's not just Maxine waiting for him just ahead.

Of course, she's there, Maxine's arm resting loosely on her shoulder, Ryan next to her. But they're not alone. There too, are his parents, standing next to a group of people he recognises as Kate's fire crew, with Bridie and Cal.

And Kate.

And even though he feels his gaze flickering between them all, trying to figure out what the hell was going on, he keeps coming back to her. "What..." is all he can manage. "Max-"

Kate inhales sharply and steps forward, but even though he can see her picking at her nails, a sure sign of nerves, he notices that the look of fear and apprehension that was so often in her gaze is gone. Instead, her eyes are ablaze with determination as she closes the distance between them. And, God, she's beautiful, even in a simple blue dress. "I kind of roped Maxine into this." Kate looks over her shoulder momentarily, giving her a small smile, before turning back to Mike. "I needed her help."

None of this is making sense, and if he'd been presented with either this or an alien invasion as the two possibilities of the day, he knows it would have been the latter he'd take to be the most likely. His throat has gone dry, and it takes him a moment to regain the use of his voice. "And what did you need her help for?" He knows he's failed to sound cool, calm and collected.

Kate takes another step forwards. "Because, I wanted to tell you, in front of your family and mine, your friends and my friends, in front of the family I hope can be  _ours_ , that I am totally in love with you. And if you give me another chance, I'll never let you go again."

He looks at the people that she's gathered, none of whom look surprised at her words. He wonders how much effort this is costing her, to say this in front of everyone, and despite himself, he reaches out to take her arm. "Kate, I-"

She shakes her head, refusing the supportive hand. "I screwed up big time, Mike. And I let you down. I let me down and Bridie and Rosie and my friends and yours. I get that now. So this time, I'm not just promising you. I'm promising them too. You said that it was about more than just us, and you were right." She swipes impatiently at a tear in her eye. "I will stand and declare my love from the rooftops, or... or scream it at every passing car. Whatever it takes for you to believe that I am all in, Mike. I love you. And I want to be with you. I want to live with you. I want to have a family with you."

He clears his throat, his heart beating very fast in his ears. "I... I don't know what to say."

"I have spent every single moment since I told you to leave missing you, and beating myself up because up until I met you, I thought family was blood. But you taught me it is so much more than that. You're the first person... the  _only_ person I ever envisioned a future with. You're the only man I'd trust to love my daughter as much as I do. And you're the only one for me. And I'm here because someone told me it wasn't too late. And I've spent every moment hoping that's true."

"Kate..." He doesn't register taking a step forwards, or tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"I will never push you away again." She vows. "Please, just give me a moment to make you believe me."

"But I want you more than for just one moment." Mike murmurs, and he closes the distance between them. And he doesn't register the applause from their family, watching on, or the stares or the sun or the air or oxygen. Just her, back in his arms again, where she belongs.


	40. Chapter 40

_Epilogue_

* * *

"I am late! I am  _so_ late!" Kate gabbles as she jumps the last few steps and dashes into the back room. "Hey, Mike, where's my-"

"Here." Mike interjects, holding up her phone charger, a smug grin on his face. He's still in his pyjamas, and has already tried to coax her back to bed several times. (Okay, so he'd succeeded twice, which was why she was so very  _late!_ ). He seems to be enjoying her panic and disorganisation though, peering at her with an annoyingly serene look on his face as he rests a hand on each of her shoulders. "Remember, organisation is the key to success."

Kate casts a quick glance over the boxes strewn across their new living room. As Kate had oh-so-smugly teased that she was 'the only one with a  _real_ job', Mike had taken up most of the responsibility of packing up both houses. However, his warped sense of humour had not exactly made things easy when it came to unpacking, with boxes labeled things like  ** _Clothes Kate Looks Super Hot In_** or  ** _Kate Seriously How Do You Have This Much Stuff In Your Wardrobe - We Need To Marie Kondo This Your Next Day Off._**  The girls had certainly not helped things, packing up their own things with enough care, but then labeling others as  ** _Random Junk Box #5._** In fact, as far as Kate could see, the only box that was actually labelled correctly was the new collection of  ** _Pool Toys_**  that Mike and the girls had bought as soon as they'd put the deposit on a house with a swimming pool.

"Mike, I love you, but I haven't had coffee yet, so tread carefully." Mike stands up straighter, and mimes zipping his lips shut. Kate rolls her eyes. "You right to find the girls' uniforms, or is that too much responsibility?"

Mike gives an enormous yawn and examines the land of boxes around, looking unconcerned. "Nah, the uniforms are in the  ** _Boring Crap_** box. I'll sort them out."

Kate resists the urge to chastise him over that particular decision, knowing that she is running late. "Alright, I gotta go." She takes the phone charger from him and presses a quick kiss to his lips, just because he can.

"See you tonight." He calls after her, like a promise.

* * *

On the way to the station, she calls Cal. It's not as though she particularly  _needs_ to call her sister after only twelve-odd hours since they last spoke, but she can't quite quell the protective streak in her that is freaking out about living away from Cal after all this time.

"I promise, I still haven't joined a cult, gotten pregnant, dropped out of uni or started taking hard drugs." Cal says by way of greeting, and Kate can practically see the mixture of smugness and exasperation on her sister, even though it's simply a phone call. "You do know you don't need to keep checking up on me."

"I'm not!" Kate protests automatically, indicating a left turn. She can practically feel Cal's judgement through the phone, and she corrects herself. "Okay, so I might have been simply making sure you're okay. I'm allowed to be protective! My baby sister is all by herself-"

"With three other housemates." Cal points out, though she sounds amused.

Kate drags a hand through her hair and sighs softly. "I just miss having you around, is all."

"Miss you too, Katie. But you don't need to call me twice a day."

"I know." Kate agrees, dragging a hand through her hair and trying to tug it one-handed into some semblance of neatness.

"Speak to you tonight." Cal replies, laughter in her tone.

* * *

"Robert, my PC is running really slow." 2Dads whines, chewing on a gingerbread man he'd gotten from who-knows-where.

RO looks to Kate as she walks in, as though begging her to save him, but she simply flashes him a  _you-know-it-won't-stop-him_ sort of look and moves to sign in. RO glares at her for a moment before turning his look of disdain back on 2Dads, brushing gingerbread crumbs from the desktop. "Take it to a computer shop." He instructs moodily, turning back to his work.

"But I did!" 2Dads presses, biting another leg off of the gingerbread man. "They said I needed to disable my cookies, but I've been biting the legs of these friggin' gingerbread men all day and it's done nothing!" A wide grin suddenly splits his face as he looks to RO for a reaction. Dutchy and Kate both let out a snort of derisive laughter, but RO remains stony faced.

"I do  _actually_ have work to do." He hisses, turning his back on 2Dads once more.

2Dads looks faintly disappointed, but hides it well, pulling himself back to his feet and trudging over to the locker rooms. "So, let me get this straight?" Dutchy begins as they begin to stow their possessions and get ready for shift. "You bought gingerbread men... for that joke... for  _Robert_ of all people?"

"No. I didn't buy them." 2Dads finishes the rest of the biscuit and rolls his eyes moodily, confessing in a rush, "I couldn't find any gingerbread men in store, so I baked them. They taste all wrong, too." Rolling her eyes at the lengths 2Dads will go to mess with 2Dads, she quickly gets into her uniform and moves to the kitchenette to grab a much needed coffee.

* * *

The day doesn't improve from there. 2Dads spends most of his free time trying to get  _some_ reaction out of RO. At first, Kate had thought he was trying to annoy him into shouting, but lately she's been getting the funny feeling that 2Dads is trying desperately to elicit a laugh from him. She's not entirely sure  _which_ of these is the better goal, but between this and the sheer amount of stupidity out today, plus significantly less caffeine than she would have hoped, she is at the end of her tether.

First, they are called out to a fire outside a busy shopping centre, and spend much of the trip there tense and prepared for casualties. When they arrive, however, it's to find a single rubbish bin out the front smouldering. "Probably from a lit cigarette tossed inside." Buffer muses, dousing the flames. "Barely worth our bloody time."

After that, they had cleaned up fuel and broken glass at a road range incident that, from what Kate could make out in among the cursing and shouting, had originated because one driver had winked at the other driver's girlfriend in the passenger seat.  _Then,_ barely two minutes after sitting down to eat lunch back at the station, a window washer had gotten himself stuck in his harness while cleaning apartment windows because he'd been too busy checking out the woman inside. Kate had drawn the short straw for abseiling down and freeing him, and after listening to his gabbled explanations ("But honestly Babe, you should'a seen how smokin' hot this chick was, but!") had to refuse to give him her  _own_ number after he began hitting on her.

"Why are all the crazies out today?!" Kate groans, half-an-hour later, as she settles herself back in the truck, rubbing at her sore temple.

Charge gives her a supportive pat on the back, and it's all she can do to hope that, when she returns, Mike has unpacked her bath bombs and wine.

* * *

Even as she pulls her car up in the driveway and gets out, she can hear the splashes and laughter coming from the backyard. Conceding that it's entirely possible that Mike has spent the whole day in the pool and that her house  _\- their_ house - will be in just as much disarray as before, she huffs and forgoes the front door, moving up the side gate of the house.

They'd bought it after seeing it together; yes, okay, so it  _was_ the house Dutchy had been talking up ever since he'd found out they were first moving. It wasn't perfect. The back deck needed to be completely redone, the walls all seemed to need a fresh coat of paint, and the garden surrounding the pool was more akin to a jungle than a backyard. But it had screamed  _home,_ for all of them, and they were happy. The girls each had a room to themselves - a whole floor in fact, with the attic rooms being split into two, though with a small secret hatch in between the two so the girls could talk whenever they wanted. It was close to the school, Mike's workshop and Kate's work,  _and_ there was a spare room for Cal when she wanted to visit.

So despite the tough day that she's had, she finds herself relaxing as she stands and watches them laughing together. She can't  _quite_ make-out the aim of the game, but Mike is astride a bright pink inflatable flamingo and holding a pool noodle like a joust (and shirtless, which definitely sends a flush to Kate's cheeks.) The girls are at the other end of the pool, Bridie on a boogie board and paddling towards him, Rose right behind on an inflatable pineapple lilo.

"See you guys are working hard." She calls over the pool fence, just in time to see Bridie slap the edge of the boogie board into the water and send a wave of water in Mike's direction, causing him to splutter.

Mike shakes the water out of her eyes and beams at the sight of her. "Hey! The girls are picking on me! Get your cossie on and come and join us!" He gestures to the line, where her swimming costume is still hanging from yesterday. Kate looks at it, realising that a swim is just the thing she needs right now. "Come on!" He presses.

* * *

Three quarters of an hour later sees Kate cursing that moment of self-indulgence. Now, not only is she faced with unpacking, but she also has to find her shampoo and conditioner. They drip-dry in the fading sun, then wrap themselves in towels and make their way to the back door. Kate takes the lead and opens the door, the kids right behind. Expecting to be faced with the same old boxes, she feels herself stop in the doorway. At least half the boxes are now gone, with the living room looking a lot more... liveable. There are cushions on the lounge, their TV is setup, and pictures line the walls - of herself and Bridie, Mike and Rose, of Rose and her mother, and Cal and Kate and Bee, and Mike and Kate. All memories of their lives before  _and_ after they met. "Wow, Mike." She murmurs in awe, looking around and making her way slowly into the kitchen. When they first got there, they'd just unpacked the plates and cutlery.  _Now,_ the cupboards were full of all of their utensils and pots and pans, the pantry stocked with sugars and flours and  _coffee._

"It's not all finished." Mike warns. "I've really only tackled our clothes,  _plus_ the kitchen and the bedding." He shrugs modestly. "But it's a start, hey? Starting to look a bit more like home." Kate moves forward and fingers a picture of Cal and Kate together that she's sure she's never printed. "Oh," Mike follows her gaze. "I stalked Cal's insta." He explains, grinning.

She kisses him, because everything about this day has just gotten better. The girls make fake gagging noises in the background. When they've pulled apart, Kate turns to Mike. "Well, I guess it's into the shower and Bee, make sure you wash your hair. We can try and get the knots out while it's still wet."

"Oh..." Mike looks abashed. "Yeah, I totally haven't gotten the rest of the girly... hair stuff... out yet." He turns to the kitchen, water droplets trailing down the back of his neck, and begins to rummage in a drawer. "Uh, if you find that, I'll get a start on dinner, hey?"

"Urgh, Mike..." Kate turns back to the boxes. "I have no idea  _how_ you've sorted any of this stuff."

"Well," Mike grins at her, still rummaging in a drawer. "You obviously haven't been paying attention to my super-awesome packing classification system, then." He winks at the girls, who both giggle.

"Oh, for goodness'..." Kate trails off, turning boxes around in frustration to reveal their labels.  ** _Mike's Cool Toys. Christmas Decorations for Decking the Halls. All The Crap from the Laundry Cupboards of Doom._**  "Mike!" She calls out in frustration, turning another box around. And then she leaps back, hands over her mouth, staring at Mike's words across it and decorated with hearts and stars.

**_Marry Me, Kate._ **

"What the-" She whips around, expecting to see Mike's teasing face laughing at her gullible self, or else still digging around in the kitchen. But he's not. Mike is there, bent down on one knee, hands clasped around a small box in his hands.

For a moment, she's simply frozen, and stupidly aware of how her hair is still dripping down her back, and she's wrapped in a towel and he's in board shorts and the girls are blue-lipped and smiling widely, admiring the scene. "Kate," He begins, and she notices that his hand is shaking slightly as he opens the box to reveal the ring inside. And, God, she has no idea about carats and stones and cuts, but it's beautiful and perfect and so is he and- "I've loved you since I met you. No one has ever... intrigued and captivated and dazzled and infuriated me like you do. Will you marry me?"

She lets out a sound somewhere between a sob and a laugh. "You... you decided to propose by... annoying me?"

Mike shrugs, looking uncharacteristically nervous. "It... it felt right. After all, I'm pretty sure I just annoyed you into dating me, anyway. Well, that and my irresistible charm." Kate lets out another laugh, and takes a step forwards, still in shock. "Is it working?" He presses, biting his lip.

"Honestly?" Kate begins, taking a step forwards and pulling him to his feet. "Yes." She answers, closing the distance between them and leaping into his arms. "Of course I'll marry you!"

* * *

_The End_


End file.
